Chapter 38
Lyra
AS IT TURNS OUT, I’M the one who hurts from the epic runeball game against Aric. Poppy returned to the dorm to warm up and dry off, but Maeve, Alina, and I stayed to wage battle against the orc. And we lost spectacularly.
Even now, bouncing along in Alina’s carriage days later, my muscles are still sore.
“We made it through,” Maeve says as she slumps against the plush cushions. There are dark circles under her eyes from staying up too late this week studying. We pulled a couple all-nighters in prep for our finals, and I think we’re all feeling it.
Except for Poppy.
She didn’t need to pull any all-nighters—in fact, I’m pretty sure she didn’t even have to study and just wanted to sit with us during our companionable suffering. Even now, she looks rosy cheeked and well rested, sitting tall beside me, looking out the window as the Mistwood rolls by.
“So, what’s the deal with your community service?” Maeve asks. “Are you starting again next semester?”
Next semester.
Our finals haven’t been marked yet, but somehow, I get the feeling I passed. I should be more excited and relieved, but all I feel is . . . numb.
Isn’t this what I’ve been working so hard for? To control my magic, to cling to my place as a student at Coven Crest? So, why do I feel so disheartened?
Cairn’s face hovers in my mind. Finals helped to distract me from my thoughts of him, but now that they’re over and we’re returning to Wysteria for our holiday break, I worry that he’s going to be constantly on my mind.
“I think so,” I say. “That’s what Moonhart said, at least.”
But will Cairn be gone by then?
I recall what he said last time I spoke to him, about the conservatory wanting him to start this coming spring. Does that mean he’ll be gone by the time I return to campus?
The realization sweeps over me like someone just dumped a frigid bucket of water onto my head.
Alina reaches over to touch my knee. “You okay? Your cheeks just went white.”
I pull my knee away from her, leaving her hand hanging there in the space between us. “Fine. Just exhausted.” I look down at Juniper, who’s perched in my lap, grooming herself. “I’m just ready to go home.”
In my periphery, my roommates exchange looks, but they say nothing.
And I keep quiet the rest of the ride back to Wysteria.
HOME. I’M FINALLY HERE.
Alina’s carriage dropped Poppy off at the café first—I was tempted to run inside and buy something sweet to eat—then me.
Now, I wave as the carriage starts away, with Alina, Maeve, Iris, and Yuki looking out the frosty window at me.
When they’re gone, leaving nothing but tracks in the snow, I turn and start up the cobblestone walkway to the house, the one I grew up in and know like the back of my hand.
After stepping inside, I push the door closed behind me, set my bag down on the floor in the hallway, and take a deep breath. The air smells of woodsmoke, strong coffee, and cedar from Papa’s workshop.
Even Juniper seems comforted by the smell, given the way she crawls onto my shoulder and sniffs at the air. “Think he has any of those glazed donuts?” she asks.
Papa has a soft spot for donuts, and he usually keeps them around to have with his morning coffee.
“I hope so.”
After wiping my boots on the mat by the door, I walk into the kitchen. Papa isn’t there, but the donuts sure are.
“Yes!” Juniper says.
A smile pulls on my lips as I snag a donut for myself and rip a big chunk off for her.
The vanilla glaze makes my fingers sticky.
Then I move through our tiny cramped house, glance into Papa’s bedroom—it’s empty—and continue into the narrow yard in the back, where his workshop is.
The snow underfoot has been packed down by Papa’s boots, so I know he’s been coming and going from his shop, as usual.
I pull the roller door open, and Papa looks up from what he’s working on—intricately carved corbels, by the look of it. As soon as he sets eyes on me, his mouth pulls into a grin, and he crosses the workshop in just a few wide steps.
“Ly!” His arms come around me, though he’s careful not to squish Juniper in the process.
I hug him back, breathing in the smell of sawdust and coffee that clings to him everywhere he goes. “Hi, Papa.”
“Oh, I’m so glad you’re home.” When he pulls back from me, there’s moisture in his eyes, and I laugh a little as he reaches up to wipe the tears away.
“You miss me that much?” I ask. “We’ve gotta get you a girlfriend, Papa.”
He pinches his lips and ruffles my hair, probably getting wood shavings in my curls. “What? You mean to say you didn’t miss me?”
The humorous smile falls slowly from my lips. Now I’m the one whose eyes are going glassy.
“Of course not,” I say with a barely concealed sniffle. Then a couple tears fall onto my cheeks, and next thing I know, I’m wrapping my arms around his middle and pressing my head to his warm chest.
His laughter rumbles in my ear. “Come on. Let’s have a bite to eat, and you can get me caught up on everything you’ve been up to. And you too, Juniper. Did you find those donuts I left out?”
Juniper crawls from my shoulder onto Papa’s shoulder, where she can often be found when we’re at home. She snuggles her face against his cheek, and he laughs.
“Yup, I can smell the sugar on you already,” he says.
Papa slings his arm around me, grabs his mug of strong coffee off his workbench, and takes me back to the house, where he proceeds to pour me a cup of tea and serve me another glazed donut.
And despite how messy everything is in my heart right now, it comforts me. Being here, being with Papa, feels safe and familiar.
But I still can’t get Cairn’s face from my mind, no matter how hard I try.