25. Lila
25
LILA
A s soon as I stepped through my door after work, I fell against it, shutting it with my back and sliding down to the ground. Max greeted me, stepping between my legs and leaning in for slobbery kisses on the cheek. I hadn’t realized tears were slipping free.
I was exhausted, more so than when I’d been having mind-blowing group sex all day. This was a different kind of exhaustion, though, as if I was emotionally hanging by a wire.
My heart ached, there was this weird tugging pull, and I felt lost, or as if I had lost something. The moment I stepped into the house, though, their scents had surrounded me, and I just deflated.
My phone rang, and I smiled when I saw who it was. “Hey.”
“You will not believe the hell I’ve been through today,” Emma said. “Take him back, please . It was so peaceful without him here. Even though all hell broke loose.”
I swiped my tears away. “He’s not being mean to you, is he?”
“No, he’s just grumpy and short-tempered.”
I chuckled. “Just say you’ll do something.”
“What do you mean?” she asked suspiciously.
“Like, if he has a lot on his plate and there’s something you’re able to do, tell him you’ll handle it. That you’ll take it over. Sometimes he likes to know it’s not all on his shoulders.”
“Lila, do you know what he does? There is nothing on his list I can—” She was interrupted.
On the other end of the phone, I heard a door bang open and Kage talking about something, snapping at people. I just sat there and strained to hear his voice. Picturing what suit he would be wearing today, wondering how deep his scowl was right now. Emma should boop his nose. I bet that would throw him off.
“Um, Alpha, I can do that,” Emma said. A growl started in the back of my throat, surprising me, and I quickly cleared my throat to get rid of it.
“Do what!?” Kage snapped nastily at her.
“Well, I can color code the files to make it easier, and I can organize them so that—”
“That’s completely unnecessary.” He spoke quickly, clearly walking away from her, but his voice was softer, not as menacing.
Emma sighed. “There is nothing I can do for that wolf. My skills in his field of expertise are zilch.”
I wondered if it would be weird of me to ask her to follow him and put the phone on speaker so I could hear more of his voice. Yeah…probably. I stood up and lay down on the couch, breathing in the spicy whiskey scent.
“What’s Rainor doing?” I asked.
“His normal minion stuff. Trailing around and taking all of Kage’s orders, making things happen.”
“And Weylin?”
Emma paused. “I think he was about to ask a gamma out for some coffee.”
This time, there was no holding back the ferocious growl that ripped out of me.
Emma chuckled. “Just come live here, you can room with me. Or there are two other condos on my floor, and they are both empty.”
“You lied!” I accused her.
“No, but yes, I did. He’s not with anyone. I haven’t even seen him all day, he’s been working in the arena. I just wanted to see how bad you had it. When they all came back without you, I thought they rejected you or you rejected them. But your scent is literally all over them. I know you didn’t claim them, but you might as well have.”
My wolf fluffed her tail, proud that we had covered them in our scent and another female knew they belonged to me. “How did you know I didn’t claim them?” I asked.
“Oh, if you had, you’d be inseparable. To the point that stretching too far would be painful.”
This is painful , I thought as I rubbed my face into the cushion. But this just was the way it had to be. They were city businessmen, and I had my house in a small town. I had my job here and everything. It wouldn’t work out. Maybe I could use them for the next cycle, though. I was already looking forward to it.
Kage
I stared at the clock in front of me. Three a.m. Only days ago, I was sleeping in until nine, sometimes even noon.
In fact, in this very bed, I had slept in until noon, woken by Lila trailing her hands along my erection. Her scent had bloomed around me while another wave was starting. I remembered opening my eyes and seeing how flush her skin was, so rosy and absolute perfection. Her blue eyes had been staring at me.
The moment was a quiet, unfiltered beauty as I allowed Lila to push me onto my back. Her sweet pink tongue came out, running around my now rock-hard cock, and her hair spilled along my thighs. I thought I might come right in that moment as she licked the pre-cum from the tip of my cock. I told her to let me take care for her, but her eyes lit up as she straddled my hips.
She told me to lie back and let her take care of herself. For me to just relax. I placed my hands behind my head and watched the most gorgeous sight unfold before me. Lila slid down my cock, her pussy so wet and hot, taking me like it was made specifically for me.
In slow, teasing movements, she rode my cock, grinding her clit down every time she hit the base, clenching and gripping me. It took everything in me to keep my hands beneath my head and not grip her hips or dig my fingers into those sweet thighs.
Her tits teased me just as much as her pussy did. They were so lush, demanding to be licked, sucked, and fucked.
I came to the sight of her taking her own orgasm from me. The afternoon light filtered into the room, the warmth from her heated skin on mine seared my skin and did something to my desolate heart. However, when her body cooled down, I was reminded of what could never be.
Now I lay alone in my bed, nothing but an empty coldness filling the room, her scent no longer on my blankets and sheets. The darkness of the night created a cold blue hue on everything in the room. I wish I had stayed longer. I wish I’d held her through her chill instead of running. I wasn’t like the others, though. Lila would never find comfort in me.
Cock in hand, just thinking of her had me close to coming. She didn’t even have to be in the same room. I gripped my shaft, ready to stop my release when those pretty blue eyes flashed in my mind once more. “Little alpha…” I whispered as I continued to stroke myself. “Why do you do this to me?” It wasn’t long before my cum was shooting up across my chest, coating my stomach.
I sighed.
So…this is awkward. Weylin spoke through the link. Kage, buddy, maybe don’t project how perfect Lila’s tits are the next time you jack off to thoughts of her.
Out of my head , I growled.
I honestly feel like we’ve reached a new level of brotherhood, and I don’t think I’m comfortable with that , he continued.
I have to agree with Weylin , Rainor chimed in. I’m not sure how I feel about what just transpired .
You too, Rain? Damn, she's good, got all of us creaming ourselves from miles away.
I shut myself off from the link.
My phone rang as I got up, grabbing my cotton shirt and cleaning myself off. With an exasperated breath, I answered.
“It’s not yet four-thirty,” Rainor said.
“I’m going to the arena.” I glanced at the side table. “Where’s my watch?” My words came out in more of a grumble than I had intended them to.
“I don’t know. I’ll meet you at the arena, though.” He fell quiet.
“You too?”
“I keep staring at the cameras. Fairly sure her surveillance team thinks I’m micromanaging them, at this point. I just wish she had left the cameras that were inside her house.”
“Can you find more discreet ones? Replace them?” I asked.
“Already looking into it.” Detecting he wanted to say more, I walked into the bathroom, ready to take a shower while I waited for him to say whatever he was pondering. “Does it hurt you too?” he finally asked.
“Yes.” I was ashamed to admit iy.
“And we are still not claiming—”
“No.” I ended the conversation right there. “There is still too much we don’t know. Has the council gotten back to us?”
“No, not on the alpha case or inquiries about Scarab Pack.”
Hm. “Well, freeze their stipends, and if we don’t hear back from them in the next forty-eight hours, we’ll pay them a visit. I want the commanding tactile team to accompany us.”
“Yes, Alpha.” Rainor hadn’t called me that in a while. Back to formalities again.
Rainor
“I want Weylin to attend the first two meetings I have scheduled.” Kage continued on the phone. His request might be problematic.
“If we can pull him from the arena. Last I heard, he worked his men until they all about dropped, and then he spent the night in the bunks down there. He hasn’t been back to the condos since leaving Lila.”
I stood in front of the coffee maker in my condo, staring at the two cream, one sugar coffee I had just made. I didn’t normally take sugar at all; most days, I drank it black, if I had any.
“He’s going to have to get over it, or I can find a new guard. The pack comes first.”
The pack comes first? I wanted to raise Kage’s father from the dead and ram those words back into his fucking mouth so hard, his dried-up, dusty brain popped from what was left of his decomposing skull.
“The pack comes first” didn’t mean we sacrifice everything in order to uphold the pack. It meant we worked together for the better of the pack. Did Kage not see us losing our mate as a potentially weak link?
A stabbing knife twisted in my chest, as it had been since I said my goodbyes to Lila. Every instinct told me I was supposed to be with her, not some damn tactile team. It was me who was supposed to be guarding her.
From what? I wasn’t sure. Weylin was feeling the same thing; he did little to mask it from the link.
“Stop acting like he’s replaceable,” I said in a hushed tone. Talking back to Kage wasn’t something I was afraid of. I respected most of what he had said, but it pissed me off that he fought so hard for the better of the pack, yet his choices and words could be what harmed the pack. Those little comments pointing out that Weylin was not pack born was going to push Weylin further away. “We’ve given everything for this pack, and now you ask us to give up our mate. I get that you’re taking your anger out on him, but if you keep pushing, you will drive us apart.” I felt the tinge of guilt before Kage swallowed it up.
“I can’t find my fucking watch,” he growled, ignoring everything I had just said.
“I’m heading to the arena.” Sleep was lost to me now. “In case you missed the message, Kage. We aren’t okay, but we are following you. Don’t fuck us up more than we already are,” I snapped, hanging up.
I pinched the bridge of my nose with my thumb and forefinger. What the hell did I just say? And why did I say it?
Weylin
I closed my eyes as the hot water came down on me, burning and stinging the multiple lacerations that covered my body. The fat lip and black eye were already healing. Blood fell from the cuts, mixing with the water that pooled at my feet.
No matter how many times I’d pulled back, or how often I’d yelled at my men not to hold out, the pain they’d inflicted was still nothing in comparison to the ache in my heart. It had fucked up my whole day. I’d missed the meetings for Kage, and I could barely focus on my normal duties.
I stood in the shower where I first tasted my mate, angry I couldn’t pick up her scent here but glad that no one else could, either.
Something has to change. Either she has to bend or we do . I spoke into the link.
Our mate? Give in? Rainor said. She will never bend. He was searching for something back at Kage’s condo.
The fates did this to cause the death of us , Kage said.
It will only be the death if we choose to ignore their plans.
Rainor gave up his searching. Then, we do the only logical thing. We give in to the fates.
We surrender? Kage scoffed. To an imaginary force?
No. We surrender to our mate. I wasn’t sure if I had projected the words loud enough for the others to hear, the thoughts an echo in my mind . Cridhe never surrendered.
If she will take us , Rainor whispered. She has just as much power to reject us as we do her.
Lila
Two days had passed without a call from any of them. I tried my best to get on with life, like they obviously had, but when I got home from work and their scents were fading, it wrecked something inside of me.
I lay on the couch but was disappointed when the strongest scent on it was mine. I rushed to the bedroom, breathing in Rainor and Weylin, but at most, it was a faint dusting. Even the pillows they had used were fading. The knife in my heart began twisting, taking my breath away.
Max walked into the room. “I hugged them too much,” I complained to him, indicating the pillows. Max let out a huff of air, as if he understood me and was flabbergasted. I mean, I knew I could call them as easily as they could call me, but I shouldn’t be obsessing over them like this.
I was Lila Evans, damn it! Detective Evans. With a deep breath, I shoved the emotions and pain deep down inside. It could fester there while I thought about what I wanted to do with it.
“I’m Lila Evans. I’m Lila fucking Evans.” I got up off my bed and marched into the kitchen. “Hungry, Max? I’m hungry. There’s a shit ton of food going bad. Let’s make dinner.” I was pretty sure I snapped. I felt like I’d snapped. This was it—this was my breaking point where I refused to break. I would just smile and pretend I had all my shit together.
Opening the fridge, I started yanking out ingredients for food. I took my phone out and searched for a recipe to make with what I had.
I was elbow deep in the recipe—two frying pans were going, and I had a roast in the oven and potatoes boiling in the pot—when there was a knock at the door. What? I never got visitors.
I was halfway to the door when the scent hit me, causing my heart to leap. I yanked open the door to find a scowling Kage. He came back for me? I didn’t think I had ever breathed in someone’s scent so deeply before. The stabbing in my chest ebbed away just a little.
“I forgot my watch.” He pushed himself into the house, forcing me to take a step back.
I frowned as I closed the door behind him. “A watch?”
“Yes. A wristwatch. It was a family heirloom, and I wish to have it back.” He began walking around the house in search of the watch.
“I haven’t seen anything like that around here. I would’ve called you if I had.”
He ignored me and continued his search, the grumpy ass. Whatever.
“Do you smell smoke?” he suddenly asked.
“My roast!” I ran back to the kitchen. One pan was smoking, and the potatoes were boiling over, foamy water spreading beneath the pot.
Kage cursed and pushed me aside. “Perhaps it would be safer if we removed your stove altogether. Do you think you can handle a microwave?”
He opened the oven, and a large puff of black smoke came out. He quickly closed the oven and gave me a pointed stare. “What the fuck is that?”
It was the roast. I guess turning up the temperature on the oven wouldn’t, in fact, cook it faster. I crossed my arms. “None of your business. I’ve changed my mind, you can leave now.”
“Obviously, we can’t. You need one of us around at all times to prevent you from burning down the place.” He went to work turning off the burners. “The potatoes might be salvageable. But whatever was in the pans isn’t. We’ll have to do a rotating schedule.” He started talking to himself. “Weylin, Rainor, and I, of course. I wouldn’t put my men through the risk of being here.” As he kept speaking, I found myself relaxing, only slightly, though. He was talking about one of them always being with me and switching that person out, almost like joint custody.
“You know”—I walked up to him and gave him a little bump with my shoulder—“you can say you want to be with me without belittling me. That is possible.”
Kage met my stare and turned towards me, giving me his full attention.
“Just because you don’t like owning up to your feelings doesn’t mean you have to go and make mine feel small.”
His lips twitched. “I apologize.”
It was on the tip of my tongue to call him a liar.
“Would you like me to take over, or would you like to continue cooking?” he asked.
I took in a deep breath before quickly letting it out, hitching my chin up in a small display of defiance. “I guess you can take over.”
Kage’s only response was to grab hold of me, one hand on the small of my back and the other at the base of my skull. He pulled me up and in close, so he didn’t have to bend down as he captured my lips with his.
I melted into him, throwing my arms around his neck and giving him as much of the possessive, dominant energy as he was giving me.
There was a knock at the door that had me pulling away. His lips traveled down my outstretched neck as he slowly set me down. “Hold that thought,” I said, praying like mad I was going to get laid again tonight, as if the last stint with him wasn’t enough sex to last me the next few years.
I opened the door, and Rainor stood there, looking as devilishly handsome as usual. His black hair was in such contrast to his skin tone, his red eyes were soft, telling me it was all him and no beast. He wore a black suit, pants, shirt, and jacket, and it reminded me of the time he and the beast had me pinned on the couch. His nostrils flared as I recalled that particular memory.
“Hey,” I said. Because what else should you say to the man who had fucked you in every opening, both tenderly and savagely?
“I forgot my tablet. Have you seen it around?”
I opened the door wider and let him in. He didn’t seem surprised at all to see Kage in the kitchen. “I haven’t seen it. Do you remember where you last had it?”
He glanced at the couch—it was definitely not there. The way I had been rolling on the thing trying to pick up every particle of Kage’s scent was embarrassing. You’d think I was going into heat again.
We started looking there before searching around the house. Each time Rainor got close to me, I would lean in and take a breath until finally he stopped what he was doing and held his arms out to me.
Sheepishly, I walked into his arms, wrapping mine around his waist and burying my nose into his chest, taking deep drags of his smoky, woodsy scent. “The pain in my chest… is that a mate thing?” I asked.
“Yes,” he said, his cheek resting on the top of my head. He had needed this hug as much as I did.
“It feels better when I can smell you.”
A low growl of satisfaction, almost like a purr, rolled through him. “I share the same sentiment,” he whispered and I smiled.
When I pulled away from Rainor, he joined Kage in the kitchen, assessing the damage. Then he poured me a glass of wine and I sat back and watched them fuss over making something to eat. The roast went right into the garbage, Kage stated he wouldn’t even feed it to Max.
I kept glancing at the door, holding my breath and waiting patiently.
Finally, there was a knock, and I jumped up, quickly making my way over before throwing it open.
Weylin stood in nothing but a pair of grey suit pants, his chest heaving, his eyes wild and hair windblown. I raised an eyebrow at him. “Forget something?”
“Yeah! My fucking mate!” He stepped through the door, bending to grab my thighs and lifting me up against him. I quickly held on to his shoulders, my legs wrapping around his waist as he pinned me against the wall.
Weylin buried his face in my neck, breathing in my scent and running his lips along the sensitive skin. Goose bumps spread as the scruff along his jaw tickled and teased me. “Staying for supper?” I asked.
He pulled back, his blue eyes shining. “Only if you’re the main course.” He grinned.