Chapter 4 #2
“I will admit to you that I have feelings for you, which undoubtedly you don’t share, but perhaps you could one day.
It would be my dearest wish. But I want to make you a proposition.
I think that your life will be very difficult without your father.
You’ve enjoyed great freedoms and protection because of him, many of which you will lose now, as a single woman.
If you feel that marrying me would make your life easier, I would marry you as an arrangement, with no wifely obligations on your part.
It would be a marriage of convenience to protect you, with no expectations on my part.
I know you don’t want to marry. But you may find your life too hard as a woman alone now.
I would marry you on your terms, whatever they are, so you can enjoy the protections your father wanted for you.
I can provide them. You don’t even have to live with me if you don’t want to.
You can live in London, and I would live in Manchester.
We could be friends and nothing more, although legally married.
Or, if you think you could develop an affection for me one day, nothing would make me happier than to be your husband, to the degree you wish.
I’m falling in love with you, Victoria, but I don’t dare hope that you could reciprocate my feelings.
It’s entirely up to you. The age difference between us is enormous.
Your father didn’t seem bothered by it, and I have no idea if you would be.
I love you, and I will do whatever you wish,” he said, and fell silent as she stared at him in amazement.
“You would do all that for me, because my father told you to?” she asked in a hoarse whisper.
“No, we had no time to go into detail. I’ve thought of most of that myself.
He asked me to take care of you, and he told me to marry you.
He said that you’re a wonderful woman and we would make each other happy.
That was about all we had time for. I was as shocked as you look now.
I’m thirty-nine years older than you are, which must make me seem like an old man to you.
My birth is of lower rank than yours. But I’ve never met another woman I loved since my wife died thirty-two years ago.
I know I love you, and I would be deeply honored to be your husband.
I love your mind and your ideas, your thirst for life and knowledge.
I would love to make you happy and to take care of you for the rest of my days.
I can provide you with a very comfortable life.
You could spend as much time as you want in London.
You can keep the house there and your father’s estate.
I’ve thought about all of it very carefully, and I think your father was right, we would make each other happy, if you don’t mind being married to a man that much older than you. ”
“I don’t want children,” she said in a choked voice with a look of panic in her eyes. “My mother died having me, and I don’t want to die to have a baby.”
“That’s entirely up to you. If you don’t want to marry me, I won’t marry anyone else.
I haven’t thought about it in years, so you can take as long as you want to decide.
And if you decide against it, I hope we can still be friends, and I will come to see you whenever I’m in London.
I don’t want to lose what we have between us now.
I am offering you a marriage that you can design, according to what you want and what suits you.
I love you. I want to take care of and protect you, and I want to make you happy,” he said simply, as she stared at him in the moonlight, still in shock from everything he had said, and the information that her father had literally ordered Bert to marry her, moments before he died.
It was his final wish. She could easily understand why.
She thought Bert was wonderful too, she just didn’t know if she wanted to marry, even as an “arrangement.” But if she did, she couldn’t think of a better man to be married to than Bert.
He was a lovely, honorable, kind, very smart man, and she loved talking to him.
She was attracted to him as well. She just didn’t know if she liked the idea of marriage.
She never had. It sounded like slavery to her, but Bert didn’t portray it that way, and was willing to accept marriage on her terms, even living in another city if she preferred.
He couldn’t have been kinder or more generous.
“Can I think about it for a bit?” she asked him hesitantly.
“I’ve just never liked the idea of marriage, but you make it sound very appealing.
I don’t want to be like my friends, shut away in the country, while their husbands play in London, and they have a baby every year.
I was much happier at home with my father. ”
“I can see why,” he said calmly, smiling at her. “That wouldn’t appeal to me either.”
“If we get married, would you teach me about your business?” Her question startled him and he looked surprised.
“Would you like that?”
“I think it sounds interesting and I’d love to learn more about it.”
“I’d like that very much.” He always ran out of subjects to talk to women about. Her interest in his business delighted him. “I’ll teach you anything you want to know.” He was smiling. She hadn’t been offended or horrified, and he could tell that she was giving it serious thought.
“I could spend time with you in Manchester, and still come to London, if I keep Papa’s house. And what about the estate in Hampshire?”
“That’s entirely up to you. You don’t need to change anything for me except your name.
The rest is all your decision.” She couldn’t have had a better offer, tailored entirely to her.
He respected her ideas, her fears, and her mind, and understood who she was.
If she did want to marry, he would be the perfect match for her.
Her father was right. She didn’t care about Bert’s social status, or his age, both of which seemed irrelevant to her.
He was so relieved he kissed her hand, and then ever so gently her lips, and she didn’t back away or avoid him. Then, very shyly, she looked at him.
“I have feelings for you too. I just never expected to marry. I didn’t think it would suit me,” she said honestly.
“The kind of marriage you describe wouldn’t.
I think you’d be bored and unhappy. But I believe we could have fun together.
I hope you wouldn’t hate Manchester too much.
My house is very comfortable, but it’s an industrial city, and doesn’t compare to London.
It’s very small, with a rather dreadful social life I try to avoid. ”
“We’d have London for that,” she said confidently.
“Don’t be so sure. Doors will close to you, if you marry me. Your blue-blooded friends won’t approve of you marrying me. They will consider it a betrayal of everything you were born to, and they won’t tolerate that.”
“Then too bad for them.”
“Don’t underestimate their reaction, Victoria. They’re the people you grew up with.”
“And that I don’t want to marry.” She smiled up at him, and he kissed her again.
They went over to the deck chairs and sat holding hands in the moonlight, not speaking for a while, thinking of everything that had been said.
She had an important decision to make. His offer was very tempting, but she still wasn’t entirely convinced that she couldn’t have a pleasant life as a spinster.
It was how she had imagined her future, not as a married woman.
Bert had turned everything upside down, but in the nicest way.
He had opened new windows into the future.
The most startling thing of all was that Alfred had told him to marry her.
It had been her father’s final wish for her.
So she knew he approved. In fact, he had picked her husband.