Chapter 31
A note from Hilldale arrived on Monday afternoon to announce that Marie had delivered a son who was named John Reginald to honour his grandfathers.
It was no surprise Marie’s first child was a son, as her father had sired three sons and only one daughter with his first wife, and so far, only four sons with his second wife, coincidentally also named Georgiana, like the late duchess had been.
With little John’s birth, the continuation of the Matlock Earldom was assured. Of course, had Marie and Hilldale not been blessed with a son, the first son of Jane and Richard birthed would have been the heir after Hilldale.
Shortly after Marie was churched, and a little before little John reached his second month, he was christened.
Jane and Richard, along with Robert Darcy, were his godparents.
The most recently married couple arrived a sennight before the christening.
They, like Darcy, had accepted the honour of standing as John’s godparents without delay.
Since their arrival at Holder Heights on their return from the Lake District, Elizabeth had noticed a glow about Jane she had never seen before.
When she asked what the cause was, aside from telling her it was her felicitous marriage, Jane refused to say anything else, even though Elizabeth was sure her older sister was not being completely open with her.
Jane and Richard departed for Rosings Park on the fourth Monday in October, about a fortnight after the christening.
With Jane married and little John’s christening over, all attention turned to Elizabeth’s coming out after her next birthday when she would turn eighteen on the fifth day of February 1809.
No matter how much she disliked the hooped court dress, she had to get used to walking in it, curtsying in it, and then back away in it without ending up on the floor.
There was a little reprieve from the preparations for her presentation around Christmastide when, as they did most years, the Carringtons travelled to Netherfield Park, where they were joined by the Fitzwilliams—sans Marie and Hilldale, as they would not travel with their son yet—and the Darcys.
On the day after they arrived, Charlotte invited her mother to call, and it was then that she and Jamey informed both of their mothers that she had felt the quickening recently, and the babe was expected in April or May of the coming year.
The grandmothers-to-be were equally joyous, and when their husbands and the future aunts and uncles were informed, there was much celebration of the news.
As pleased as Elizabeth was at the prospect of a niece or nephew, the attention paid to the good news had interrupted her practising for her presentation, something she could not repine. Unfortunately, Mrs Annesley had her back to practices the next morning, so the reprieve was short.
Elizabeth was granted a longer break from practising and thinking about her presentation when she was informed that there would be no more from the Saturday of Christmas Eve and they would resume on Monday, the second day of January.
As much as she did not like all the rehearsing, Elizabeth understood why it was needed.
It would not do to commit a faux pas in front of the Queen and disgrace her whole family.
Understanding did not mean she had to like the experience.
Having Jane in the same house again was a boon for Elizabeth even though things had changed significantly.
She was sanguine with the changes regarding what chambers they slept in.
It was not as if she were lonely; she had Mary in the bedchamber Jane used to occupy at Netherfield Park like it was at Holder Heights.
Also, like now when Anna was in residence, the latter shared the bedchamber with Mary.
What Elizabeth noticed was she was no longer Jane’s confidant as she had been for all the years as they grew up. On that subject, she decided to seek Mamma’s counsel.
“What troubles you, Lizzy?” Edith asked. She had seen Lizzy trying to puzzle something out and had waited until her middle daughter asked to speak to her, which she had done that morning. Mother and daughter were ensconced in the master suite’s private sitting room.
“Do you think Jane is upset with me?” Elizabeth enquired.
“If she is, I have seen no evidence of it,” Edith responded thoughtfully. “What caused you to think so?”
“She no longer confides in me like she used to, the way I still want to share everything with her.” Elizabeth cogitated for some moments, thinking about what she had seen over the years between her parents and other married couples in the family.
She also considered that things were different between her and Charlotte.
She came to a conclusion. “It is what happens when one marries, is it not?”
“Indeed, it is. When you were younger, all three of you girls have heard me speak of how a woman cleaves to her husband when they marry. That does not only refer to where a married woman lives; it is also with regard to all levels of the relationship. When you and Mary find and marry the person you love, and there is respect as well as love, then you will be true partners, which means you will share with each other first,” Edith explained.
“This is what Jamey and Jane have both found in their partners. That does not mean that Jane will no longer confide in you about anything. However, the first person she will speak to is Richard, and in a good and equal marriage, there will be no secrets between husband and wife.” Just then a dreamy look came over her.
“It is exactly what I have with your papa. You know, I am very close, and have been for close to forty years, to Aunts Elaine and Anne, do you not?”
“Yes, Mamma, I am aware of that.”
“No matter that we are sisters of the heart, the first person I speak to about anything is your father. The three of us do discuss much, but nothing like we used to before we married. That does not make us any less close to one another than we have always been. Lizzy, dear, it is a lesson you will learn, especially when you find that special someone you want to spend the rest of your life with; all will become clear. As you will remember our talk word for word, go over it in your head once you are engaged or, better yet, married. Review my words, and they will make sense to you.”
“Thank you, Mamma,” Elizabeth averred warmly. She stood and hugged Mamma before leaving the sitting room, feeling much better.
~~~~~~~/~~~~~~~
As Elizabeth’s eighteenth birthday approached, her feelings for William deepened.
She could no longer fool herself into thinking she was not falling in love with him, or possibly already in that state.
Because of that, two days past, the day after they had removed from Hertfordshire to London, Elizabeth had asked Mamma how she would know if she was in love.
As she did with everything else, Elizabeth could remember the conversation word-for-word.
She had found Mamma in her private sitting room and requested that they speak.
“Lizzy, you know I am always available for one of my children,” Mamma had replied.
“Sit, dearest, and tell me what it is that is bothering you. I have seen that at times you are trying to solve some great puzzle, but I did not want to approach you until you were ready to seek my counsel, as you are now.”
“You know me so well,” Elizabeth had said as she took a seat on the settee next to her mother.
She had paused as she gathered her thoughts.
“I know that I have very tender feelings for William, and I have had for more than a year already, but how do I know if I am in love with him, or for that matter, if he is in love with me?”
“That is an age-old question. I have not asked William about his feelings, and neither has your Aunt Anne, but we both believe he loves you and not as a cousin. As to your feelings, allow me to pose some questions.”
“Mamma, you may ask me anything you desire.”
“Lizzy, when William is not in your company, do you find yourself thinking of him, wondering where he is and what he is doing?”
“Yes, Mamma, I do. William fills my thoughts and dreams if I am not busy.”
“When you are in his company, do you feel fluttering in your belly, does your heart rate speed up, your breathing as well, and do you blush in his company far more than with any other?”
Elizabeth had nodded, acknowledging that all her mother asked occurred regularly.
“Now, my darling daughter, the most important and telling question. Is there any version of your future you can imagine where William is not at your side? Could you think of any other man who would be a good substitute for William? Do not forget that you will be exposed to many new men after you come out. The question though, is do you have the inclination to seek another man? Or is that a waste of time because William is the only man you desire to be your partner?”
After cogitating about what her mother had just asked, Elizabeth had known what the reply was as clearly as anything she had ever known before.
“No, I cannot think of a future without him. Also, I care not how many men I meet when I am out in society; none of them will ever replace William in my affections.”
“Then, dear daughter of mine, you are in love with William. It is the only explanation for the replies you have given me.”
“Mamma, will you and Papa tell William that if he is so inclined, he need not wait for my full season to pass before he declares himself? I do not want any other man to think that my eye will fall on him as a possible suitor.”
“Yes, Lizzy, your father and I will have that discussion with William after your coming-out ball. And before you ask, yes, he will be permitted to dance two sets with you. Even though Papa danced the opening set with you at the ball before Charlotte and Jamey’s wedding, he will still claim your first set when you come out in London society. ”