Chapter Seven
Chloe
Once Trystan can move again, he hauls me into his arms, plastering me against his chest. I cling to him, listening to the way his heart beats a frenzy beneath my ear.
My whole body still tingles. If my shoulder or my ankle still hurts, I don't feel them.
I just feel a sense of satisfaction that runs bone deep.
I think it's the same for him. He's sweet beneath me, periodically dropping kisses to my crown, running his fingers through my hair, or down my back. He's still inside me, still mostly hard. But it's just…so damn sweet.
We don't say anything for a long time, but silence isn't my natural state. It never has been. And I've got a lot on my mind. So many questions, so much I never said to him, and so many things I've never heard from him.
"Just say it, Coco," he says before I manage to put my thoughts in order.
I peek up at him to find him smirking at me. "What?"
"You think loudly, baby. Just say whatever is on your mind so you can relax again."
"I don't think loud," I mutter, but we both know it's a lie. So I huff, pause, and then bite my bottom lip. "I guess…I guess I'm just wondering why you've treated me like a problem for so long if you felt this way."
His hand pauses on my back. "You think I treat you like a problem?"
"Um, yes?" I stare at him with wide, dramatic eyes. "Don't pretend you haven't, Tryst."
He sighs because he knows he can't really deny that I'm right here. "Your brother is my best friend. My brother is in love with your sister. We were raised as family. I never wanted to cross a line and fuck things up for our parents and siblings."
"You think I didn't worry about the same thing?" I whisper. "My parents love you. I've always been afraid that if they knew how I felt, it would change everything." I snort softly. "I think my mom knew anyway. She's smart like that."
"Yeah, she is."
"Do you…do you still feel like being with me will mess things up for everyone?
" I ask, my voice so soft it barely carries.
I need his answer, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't afraid of hearing it.
We've always put everyone else first. If that's what he wants to keep doing, it's going to break my heart, because that's not what I want.
I'm tired of living for everyone else and pretending that what I want doesn't matter.
It does matter. It matters a whole hell of a lot.
But…does it matter to him the same way?
When the only response I get is his silence, I think I have my answer. He wants me, but just not enough. I'd risk everything to be with him, but he'll never risk the same for me. I shouldn't be surprised…but it hurts anyway.
"Well, I guess that's that then," I mutter, swallowing the lump in my throat as I try to disentangle myself from his arms as delicately as possible. I won't cry. Not now.
God, I should have demanded this conversation before I fell into bed with him.
I knew there was a possibility I'd get this answer.
Maybe that's why I didn't push it. I wanted one perfect moment with him, just one to sustain me or satisfy me or…
something. Just one moment where he was mine and nothing else mattered.
It was stupid. Because now I've had that moment, it isn't nearly enough, and everything else matters more than I wished it did.
"Chloe, stop," he says, grabbing for me before I can haul myself out of his arms.
"Let me go, Trystan."
"Hell no," he growls, rolling until I'm pinned beneath him again.
I try to push against him, to fight him to let me go, but the man is a brick wall, forged in the damn dirt of the vineyard. He doesn't even budge. He just gently gathers up my hands, pinning them above my head.
"You don't get to do this," I seethe, glaring at him.
"Do what?"
"Make me your secret!" I cry. "You don't get to fuck me when no one is around and then go back to the way things were when everyone is looking. If you want to treat me like a problem, then that's what I'll be to you. Just a damn problem."
His eyes meet mine, wild and full of frustration.
"You are a problem," he rasps, unflinching.
I try to knee him in the thigh, but it's impossible when he's still inside me.
"Jesus, baby. You're the problem I've never been able to stop thinking about.
You're the problem who keeps my cock hard.
You're the problem that has me losing my fucking mind on a daily basis. All I've ever thought about is you."
"You think it isn't the same for me?" I cry up at him. "Even when I didn't want to think about you, I did. Even when I wished I could hate you, I couldn't! But you'll never choose me, Trystan. And I won't be your secret shame."
"My shame?" he growls, something dark and volatile in his eyes. "You think I'm ashamed of you?"
I just shrug in response.
"You were always the best part of my life. Even when I thought you fucking hated me, you were the best part. I already chose you, Chloe," he growls. "I chose you years ago. But it was never my choice that mattered. It was always yours. I've always been waiting for you to make it."
"W…what?"
"You heard me. Fuck our families. Fuck your brother.
Fuck what's going on with Jax and Jade. Fuck right or wrong, or what we should or shouldn't do.
You're mine, baby. I don't give a fuck if claiming you destroys everything.
No one is taking you from me now that I finally have you right here.
" His lips come down on mine, his kiss hard, unrelenting.
I choke on his name, choke on his taste on my tongue. My mind is reeling, trying to make sense of everything he just threw at me. But he doesn't give me time before he's moving inside me again, his hips slamming into mine like he's trying to prove that I belong to him.
I wrap my legs around his waist, rocking with him, as wild and desperate as he is. He won't release my hands, so I bite him.
"Fuck!" he roars, fucking into me hard enough to steal my breath. It feels so damn good, like I'm flying and falling at the same time.
"You and this pussy were made for me," he groans against my lips. "I'll tear everything down before I give you up now."
"Trystan," I sob, already on the verge of shattering into pieces for him. But he isn't finished reordering my world yet. Oh, no. Not by half.
"You made your choice when you touched yourself last night, knowing I was listening. You don't get to take it back now, princess. I'll plant my baby in you before I let that happen."
My core clenches at his threat, and I know he knows how much I like it.
His dark chuckle tells me clearly that he knows.
"That's right, princess," he groans, slipping one hand between us. "I want you carrying my kid. That's how certain I am in my choice. That's how much you're mine."
"No," I manage to gasp. "That's how much you're mine, Trystan."
"You doubt it?" His gaze flicks to mine, his lust-dilated eyes holding mine captive before he places his lips against my ear. "I've always been yours, Coco. No one else even exists to me."
I think part of me knew that already, but hearing him confirm it? Yeah, that does something to me. Suddenly, he isn't the only feral one in this bed. I am, too.
I manage to rip my hands out of his hold. Manage to flip us so I'm on top of him now. This time, he doesn't fuck me. I ride him, holding his gaze as I bounce on his lap.
"Fuck yeah," he grunts, his fingertips digging into my hips as his head kicks back. Sweat beads along his abs, a single rivulet dripping down the center. "Fuck me just like that, princess. Take what's yours."
I do. I lift up and slam myself back down again and again. My nails rake his chest and abs, leaving behind marks. Every single time, he just growls for me to mark him again.
"Don't take those fucking claws out of my skin, Chloe," he orders. "Not until you're coming all over me."
It doesn't take long for his filthy mouth and the intense pleasure to get me there. He's so damn deep, I can't breathe. I'm hovering on the edge, sobbing his name every time I land against his lap.
"You look so pretty when you're full of me," he rasps. "Christ, I'm never going to get enough of you like this, Coco. You're every dream I've ever had."
"M-me too," I whimper, slamming down on him again.
He pinches my clit, sending me shooting over the edge. I fall with his name bursting from my lips in a desperate crack of sound. He growls when he hears it, bucking into me wildly as he falls too.
We shake and moan our way through it, with him holding me down on him and my nails in his skin. It's just as intense as the first time, just as perfect.
I collapse against his chest, wrung out and trembling. His arms close around me, keeping me captive against his heart.
"This right here is where you belong, Coco," he whispers. "I've just been waiting for you to figure it out." His lips brush my forehead. "Would have waited a lifetime if that's what it took."
I don't have to ask to know he means it. I hear the truth resonating in his voice. Trystan Goodson was always willing to color outside the lines for me. He just needed my permission first.
"We've missed so much," I whisper.
"Hey." He crooks a finger beneath my chin, tipping my head back until our eyes meet.
"Don't fill yourself with regret when we're finally where we should be.
Maybe it took us a while to get here, but we were always traveling this way together.
Sometimes, it just takes a little longer to reach the destination. "
"You should stay here and rest your ankle."
I roll my eyes, already slipping into a pair of shoes. "My ankle is fine, Trystan. It doesn't even hurt now."
The rest of me is deliciously sore. Not even the hot bath he demanded I take eased all of my muscle aches, but I'm not complaining. It's like a little reminder of what we spent half of the day doing.