Chapter 76- Fear of the Unknown
I opened the house door and walked in with a sigh as I removed the shoes I was wearing. It was such an exhausting day.
“ Hey, welcome," Bella said and I turned to the sitting room to see her watching one of our favorite television shows.
“ You're still awake," I said as I walked to her and hugged her.
“ Yeah, I was waiting for you, Mom's asleep,” she said and I nodded before I sat down on the couch.
“ How was it today at work?" She asked,
“ Was good, what can I say? You know you were right and Cole wasn't so pleased when he saw that I came to the office,” I said and she chuckled,
“ I told you so, by the way, the food you ordered is on the kitchen counter, Mom actually made something you should have called me," she said,
" Oh really? I just wanted Korean food, that's all,” I said as I walked to the kitchen to carry the food then I returned to the couch as I opened the package.
“ Kimchi, I'm going to eat," Bella said happily and I couldn't help but chuckle.
We both started eating as we watched the show, Bella ended up eating more and I didn't mind. I was lucky she was with me afterall.
“ Aren't you sleepy yet?" I asked and she shook her head,
" Okay, I'll quickly shower and be right back, I have something to tell you,” I said before I stood up, taking the empty kimchi container.
“ We can just talk while you shower, it's even more fun," she said as I faced palm, that's my best friend for you, as long as it had to do with any information, she didn't have the patience, she hated being anxious.
“I won't be long,” I said, already making my way to my room.
I opened my room door and walked in as I closed it behind me. My phone immediately vibrated with a message and I knew it was from Cole.
‘ Did you get home safely?’ The message read,
‘ Yeah, I'm about to take a shower,’ I typed before pressing send.
‘ Alright, go to bed early, goodnight my love, see you tomorrow.” I don't know if it was just me but there was something about the way he sent the message that made me feel like he was angry.
‘ Okay love, goodnight,’ I replied as I dropped the phone on the bed and made my way to my bathroom.
He needed to realize that this isn't any of our fault, we found ourselves in this situation, love brought us together and we don't have a way of coming out. He should understand that I want to do all the things he wants us to do but I just can't, not in public.
I removed the clothes I was wearing as I dumped them in the laundry basket and then I took my toothbrush to brush my teeth.
When I was done brushing I walked into the bathroom to shower. I just couldn't help but smile when I thought of Cole, showering with him always makes me feel special, it wasn't only about our intimacy, it was the way he took care of me, he'd wash my hair, running his fingers gently through it. Sometimes I'd have to fight him off when it comes to washing my body. He was just a blessing, Derick never treated me that way.
When I was done showering I walked out of the bathroom to get dressed. I decided on a pink tee-shirt and pink sweatpants.
“ I thought you would have fallen asleep," I said to Bella with a laugh as I walked to her and sat beside her on the couch.
“ Was that why you took so long? So I'll be asleep by the time you're out, you should know me by now, as long as you have something to tell me I'll wait. So what happened?” she asked and I just sighed,
" Cole is not really cool with this secret relationship stuff and all, he wants to be romantic and all but you know how things are Bella? I don't want him to be dragged by the media because of me so I'm doing the right thing keeping us a secret and you should have seen his father today,” I said,
" Wait, you met with his dad today?” she asked,
" Yeah, he came to the office, God he was so scary,” I said as I hugged her and hid my face in the crook of her neck like a child trying to get away from a mean adult.
" Ow my bestie, what is love doing to you?” she said as she combed her fingers through my hair.
“ I'm scared Bella, I'm scared that I'm in love with Cole so deeply that I can't get out, I just want every moment with him and it scares me that something might separate us," I said as I wrapped my hands around her.
“ It's going to be fine, have faith, remember that if it's true love it would always work out," she said,
“ I know but the thought of anything happening just scared me, I don't want to be separated from him,” I said,
" You worry too much, nothing is going to happen. Believe in the love you have for him,” she said and I nodded.....“ We should go to bed already, it's pretty late,"
" Alright,” I got up from the couch as I helped her sit on her wheelchair and then I pushed her to her room, with her laughing.
" Quiet, you don't want to wake Mom,” I said and she covered her mouth.
I opened my room door and pushed her inside before closing the door. Since her accident she has been sleeping with either me or Mom so we could take care of her in case she needed to use the toilet.
I helped her get into bed before I got in bed too.
“ Good night Bella," I said,
“ Good night Anna," she said,
I closed my eyes as I got comfortable in bed waiting for sleep to come welcome me into its embrace.
As I tried to sleep, there was just one thought in my mind.
Just for how long do I intend to keep hiding?