Chapter 30
Ashlyn
“I want to see the badgers,” Demi says, and both Cal and Zane look at her like she’s nuts.
“Why would you want to see badgers?” Cal asks.
“Aren’t they mean?” Zane asks.
“Very mean,” Cal agrees.
“Just because they are a little spicy does not mean they are mean,” Demi argues as she puts suntan oil on.
When she’s got it good and lathered on her hands, she passes it to both Zane and Cal, who do the same.
And meanwhile, I’m over here rubbing both me and Bentley down with sunblock, 50 SPF.
I guess that’s how to tell you’re the only one in the group that’s not a supermodel or an ex- reality TV show star.
“Listen,” I say as I pull the sunshade over Bentley’s stroller. “I want to show Bentley all the animals at the zoo. Elephants, tigers, giraffes, and badgers.”
“Thank you,” Demi says, smiling at me and tossing a look at Cal.
“Even though they’re jerks,” Cal mumbles, and Zane chuckles.
“They’re not jerks!” Demi argues. “They eat fruit.”
“And squirrels,” Cal adds.
“They can also run up to twenty miles per hour,” she says.
“Making it easier for them to attack. Because they’re jerks,” Cal says, and Demi groans. Zane laughs, and I start walking.
“Let’s go, guys. We have a lot to see and not a lot of time,” I say.
“What are you talking about?” Zane asks. “The zoo closes at five.”
“And Bentley gets grumpy around two,” I say. “And you do not want to be around when that happens.”
“You heard her,” Zane says. “We’re on the clock, boys and girls, now move!”
Bentley is having a great time, even though the only animal he is interested in is the seagulls, and they aren’t even a part of the zoo.
Zane is holding him and pointing out the giraffes, orangutans, and badgers, but all Bentley wants to watch are those birds.
It is funny watching one of them aggressively try to steal some lady’s sandwich.
“Bentley, Bentley, look,” Zane says. “It’s a lion!”
“I think he likes birds,” Cal says, popping a handful of trail mix in his mouth.
He doesn’t eat the M&Ms, because, like Zane, he has to watch what he eats.
Demi helps him with the chocolate. Every time he pulls one out of the bag, he hands it to her, and she takes it with a small smile before they return to their normal banter.
“Birds are lame,” Zane says. “Especially those ones.”
“Why don’t we take him to the bird sanctuary?” I suggest.
“Because birds are lame,” Cal parrots Zane’s words.
“I think you guys are lame,” Demi says, snatching another M&M.
“Yeah, but Bentley is one of us,” Zane says, walking closer to the glass of the lion habitat where a male lion is sitting facing away from us. “Isn’t that right, little man?”
The lion turns around slowly to face us, and Bentley’s face goes from uninterested to a whimpering pout, and Zane backs up.
“On second thought, I bet those birds are super underrated,” he says. With that, we move on to the bird section of the zoo.
As it turns out, Bentley is enthralled by the rest of the birds that the zoo has to offer, especially the African Spoonbill and the Black Crowned Crane. Not that I’m shocked. Any kid who thinks seagulls are cool will obviously be super into birds with a spazzy yellow mohawk.
“Check it out, Little Man,” Zane says, pointing in the air. “That one is a vulture. It eats squirrels.”
“Maybe it’s friends with the badger,” Cal nods at Demi with a smirk. She tosses him a look, and he walks over to Zane, leaving Demi and I sitting towards the back.
“He’s really amazing,” Demi says quietly with a smile.
“Who? Cal? Do you like him?” I ask.
“What? No! I meant Zane. He’s amazing with Bentley,” she says.
“Oh, right,” I nod, and then I smile too. “Yeah, he really is. It’s wild considering that just a couple of weeks ago he didn’t even know he was a dad.”
“It’s so crazy,” Demi says. “What kind of mom would just drop him off on Zane’s doorstep? Is there any update on that? If she comes back into the picture, can she take him back?”
“Well, considering she literally abandoned him, I think there would be legal repercussions she would have to face,” I say. “But as far as I know, she hasn’t come back around.”
“And what about you?” she asks. “How do you feel about all of it? I mean, you went from paparazzi photographer to fake girlfriend of Zane Calloway, which, by the way, that’s shot to hell, I think.”
“What do you mean?” I ask with little to no success, biting back a smile.
“I mean, if your best friend can tell you got it bad for one of the sexiest men alive…you have it bad for one of the sexiest men alive. And his kid.”
I open my mouth to argue, but as I watch Zane holding Bentley with one hand while pointing at birds with the other, I realize I have no response to that. Not an argumentative one, anyways.
“Yeah…I guess I do,” I admit.
After we are finished looking at birds, we make our way out. Demi and Cal argue about which way we should go next, and Zane hands Bentley off to me.
“That was cute,” I tell him.
“What was?” he asks.
“I didn’t know you liked birds so much,” I say with a smile. “I mean, I really do prefer lions,” he says. “But not after what he did to Bentley.”
“He looked at him,” I say flatly.
“He terrified him! Did you see that little lip? It broke my heart. Fuck that lion.”
I start laughing. But all of a sudden, I stop. “Do you hear that?” I ask.
“What?”
I crane my neck to listen harder, and after another couple of seconds, I confirm it.
“That music,” I say. “Come on, let’s go! He’s going to love this.”
I head off with Bentley toward the music, and everyone else follows. After following the path through the trees, we round a corner and come to an opening, and I stop.
“It’s a merry-go-round,” Cal says.
“A carousel,” I say.
“Like the mobile above the crib,” Zane chimes in.
Yes, just like that.
“Well, I think we need to ride it,” Cal says. “All of us.”
With that, he tugs Demi towards the entrance and pulls her up onto the platform, and helps her onto a zebra despite her protests.
Zane helps me and Bentley up, and we sit in a chariot. As the music starts to play, the ride spins and Bentley’s eyes grow wide as he watches the animals and the lights. Meanwhile, I can’t stop smiling.
“I feel like a kid again,” Zane says.
“I do too. I think we all feel that way. This has been really fun,” I say.
“I think we needed this,” he says. Then he turns to me. “So I gotta ask, what’s the obsession with carousels?”
“You picked up on that?” I ask, and he gives me a look.
“You’re slowly decorating the entire nursery in circus themed stuff,” he says. “It’s kind of hard to miss. So, what is it?”
“Well,” I say, but he cuts me off.
“Wait. Let me guess. You haven’t been close to your parents in years. It’s part of why you want to be a mom so badly. And your favorite memory with them was at a carnival where you begged them to take you on the carousel and proceeded to ride it until the park closed for the night.”
“Close,” I say.
“Really?”
“No. Not even a little,” I say, and he laughs.
“My parents and I talk every Sunday on the phone. They live in Tucson near my grandmother and I usually go there for Thanksgiving or Christmas every year. I have no negative childhood memories, and the only reason I like carousels is because of a tacky little Christmas decoration I found at a yard sale. I keep on a bookshelf year-round because something about it has always made me happy.”
Zane laughs, a real laugh that comes from somewhere deep inside him. “Well, for what it’s worth, I love that you love them,” he says. Then, with no second guessing, we both lean in and kiss, not caring if cameras are flashing or anything else.
After we get off, I look at the time. “I think we should probably head out soon if we want to get Bentley home before his timer runs out.”
“Good lord, I think one of his timers already did run out,” Zane says. “The one in his drawers.”
“Uh oh,” I say, reaching for him. “Does someone need a new diaper?”
“I can do it,” Zane says, and I let my arms drop to my sides. Then he grabs the diaper bag and heads off toward the bathroom.
“I don’t know what you did to my boy,” Cal says, watching Zane disappear into one of the family bathrooms. “But it looks good on him.”
“What looks good on him?” I ask.
“Happy,” he says.
Suddenly my phone starts to ring, and I answer it, still grinning. But the smile fades when I answer it.
“Too busy having fun to answer your phone, I see,” Deborah’s voice comes through the speaker. At first, I’m in so much shock, I don’t even know how to answer. Deborah has never called me directly before. That’s what she hired Prudy for.
“No, Deborah, I uh–”
“Stop stuttering and let’s get to the point. The media are exploding right now with photos of you, Calloway, and the baby,” she says cooly.
“Oh. Is that bad?” I ask.
“Of course not. Any publicity is good publicity as far as Sigma is concerned. But it’s not enough. Have you managed to take any photos inside? Like we talked about?” she asks. I press the phone closer to my ear and step off to the side while Demi and Cal joke back and forth.
“I did. I turned in photos of him posing in his room, remember?” I ask. I sent her the black and white bedroom shoot.
“A couple of pictures of Zane Calloway sitting on the edge of his bed aren’t exactly going to make waves considering that’s what every photoshoot he’s ever done looks like,” she says.
“Those were the best I could get,” I say.
“You live in his home, Ashlyn. I have a hard time believing that was your best. But if it was, I think you had better start looking for a different job. Failing an easy assignment won’t be tolerated.”
The phone goes dead, and I swallow hard before turning back around just as Zane walks up.
“Well, I think it’s safe to say you were right about that timer,” he says as Bentley starts to fuss. “You ready to go home?”
“Yeah. Yes,” I stutter.
“You alright?” he asks.
“Of course,” I answer. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
Zane studies me for a moment, but all I offer him is a smile. And as we pack up to leave, I think I have him fooled. But Demi is also watching me, and considering how long we have been best friends, I think she knows better.