Chapter 15 Aspen
ASPEN
MAY
Parker is a really nice guy.
Conversation has been easy all night, chatting and laughing along with Sage and Oakley, who are both so bubbly and excited about life, it's impossible to be anything but happy around either of them. Parker seems very smart, and even though he’s more quiet than Oakley, he seems just as laid-back. I think we could be great friends.
More importantly, I think my plan might actually work.
Despite all the polite compliments and his genuine interest in getting to know me, I haven’t gotten any vibes that Parker is actually interested in dating me.
There have been no casual touches, no lingering stares like I noticed between him and Oakley at the gym.
I think my initial assumption that he’s into his best friend might be correct.
When they approached us during our workout, I was a little thrown off by how flirty Oakley seemed to be. I’d thought maybe the men were hiding their relationship by the way I’d seen them interact, but Oakley’s flirting was real enough for me to believe they aren’t together.
I quickly latched onto Parker because he seemed far less interested.
The connection I’d noticed between them had to be real, though.
I wondered if he might be in the exact same situation that I am—stuck pining after his best friend.
As much as I wouldn’t wish that fate on anyone, I’m still hoping I might have lucked out and found someone who’d be willing to pretend to date me.
If my theory is correct, we could keep up the double dates and not lose any time with our best friend too.
That would be even better than the fake relationship I’d initially pictured after telling Arthur that I’d find someone in Chicago.
“Haven’t you been on it before?” Parker asks when he notices that I’m lost in my thoughts as we prepare to board the Ferris wheel.
“We’ve been here for years already, but I can’t say we’ve actually been on it,” I admit.
“Don’t worry, Ferris wheels are statistically very safe, especially permanently constructed ones like this,” he says. I think he’s trying to reassure me, assuming that I was so quiet because I’m afraid. “Plus this one is enclosed, so there’s little risk involved,” he adds.
I love how nerdy his pep talk is, and that he’s trying to be so supportive. I don’t bother to correct him that I’m not nervous. “I think I’ll be safe with you,” I answer honestly, winking as I give his arm a little squeeze.
Oakley helps Sage step on first, and Parker offers me a hand as I leap inside. There’s bench seating on two sides of the private gondola, and I scoot in close to Parker, wanting to confirm my assumption that he won’t make a move as we sit across from the others.
“I’ve always wanted to kiss someone at the top of one of these,” Sage admits, looking right at me, and I can’t help but laugh at her not-so-subtle suggestion before she turns to face Oak.
“I think that can be arranged,” he promises with a wink, putting his arm around her.
As much as I hate to admit it, they do make a great couple.
I might wish that things could be different, that I could be the one making Sage look so full of joy, but I know that could never happen.
I want her to be happy, and Oakley seems like he could be a great partner for her.
When we’re at the top, he leans in for a kiss, and I don’t hide my laughter at their cheesy display. I offer Parker a warm smile when he doesn’t suggest we do the same.
“I don’t want to overstep by suggesting this, but I had a fantastic time tonight and would love to do it again,” Oak says when we’re finally back in the lobby of our building.
“So would I,” Parker adds, smiling at me.
I look at Sage, already sure what her answer will be, and smirk at how eager she looks as we both agree.
“Do you want tonight to be over already?” Sage asks Oakley coyly, and the flash of jealousy in my gut is so strong I have to grind my teeth to keep my smile in place.
“Well, I didn’t want to assume anything,” he answers her with his own grin.
I want her to be happy. Oakley could make her happy, I remind myself. I take a deep breath and force myself to ignore those ugly feelings and continue on with my plan. “Come on, show us your place,” I suggest as I take Parker’s hand and lead him into the waiting elevator.
They give us a quick tour of their penthouse, and holy shit, I thought our place was nice, but it’s ridiculous.
It isn’t long before Sage and Oakley excuse themselves to his room, already making out before his door is fully closed.
The flame of jealousy in my gut roars to life once again, but I ignore it.
Alright, time to get a fake boyfriend.
“Do you want anything to drink?” Parker offers, reminding me once again why he could be so perfect for this. He seems like such a great guy. Plus he isn’t trying to get me in his bed. He hasn’t tried to touch me all night.
“No, thank you. I was hoping that we could talk in your room?” I suggest, not wanting to risk Sage or Oakley interrupting our conversation.
He leads me to his room, and I make myself comfortable on his bed, sitting cross-legged with a pillow on my lap as I look up at Parker awkwardly standing in the middle of the room.
I’m not sure where to begin, but I inhale deeply to steady myself and just go for it.
“Parker, I like you,” I start. His eyebrows pull together like he’s confused, and it’s kind of adorable to see the giant man struggling to follow my train of thought.
“Thanks, I like you too,” he answers.
My stomach is full of butterflies as I prepare to admit my biggest secret, but I don’t want to draw this out.
“But I don’t like you the way that you probably think I do.
The way Sage likes Oakley,” I admit hesitantly, nodding in the direction of the wall they share where music is failing to drown out the sounds of their hookup.
“I’m so sorry if I made you think you had to stay tonight…” the sweet man starts, making me like him even more.
I cut him off, not wanting him to stress, offering what I hope is a reassuring smile. “No, don’t worry. You didn’t pressure me at all or do anything wrong.”
He lets out a deep breath, obviously relieved, though still looking very confused.
“Parker, can I trust you?” I ask, suddenly worried that this is going to blow up in my face and end with him telling Oakley and Sage everything.
He pauses to think, and I appreciate that he seems to understand the gravity of my question.
“You’ve only really known me for a day, so I’m not sure how much you should believe me,” he starts.
“If you’re asking as a polite way to protect sensitive information, though, I can assure you I’m trustworthy, and I give you my word I won’t share your secrets,” he promises.
I laugh at his formal answer, both relieved and genuinely amused by how literal Parker is at times. “You’re going to be fun,” I mutter. “Can you sit down so we can talk?”
Once he’s seated in his office chair facing me, he sits up straighter and nods. “Alright, what would you like to tell me?”
“I’d just like to start off by saying that I really did have a great time tonight,” I ramble.
“Me too,” he agrees easily.
I hesitate, biting my lip. What if I’m wrong. What if he says no? But I won’t know if I don’t ask. “I really liked that we could all hang out together, and it’s clear that you and Oakley are really close, like Sage and I.”
“Yeah, it’s nice to have someone who understands our friendship,” he agrees.
I look at him expectantly, hoping that maybe he’ll admit his feelings for Oakley without me even having to ask, but he doesn’t.
I take one final steading breath and go for it. “Fuck it, I won’t know if I’m too afraid to say it, so I’m just going to ask. Parker, do you have feelings for Oakley?”
Luckily he doesn’t seem offended by the question, although the amusement on his face and the short laugh he lets out aren’t what I was expecting either.
“No, Aspen, it’s not like that, and it never has been,” he says. “I thought that you of all people, with how you and Sage are, would understand that just because two people are really close, it doesn't mean they’re in love with each other.”
Fuck.
That isn’t the answer I was hoping for. I twist my ring nervously as I wait for him to connect what I’m implying.
After a few moments, it finally clicks. “Oh. You wouldn’t understand, would you?” I shake my head a few times, still smiling as I try to hide how fucking nervous I feel right now. “Because you are in love with Sage?” he clarifies, and I slowly nod, gauging his reaction.
His expression falls, and maybe I misread his lack of interest because he does seem disappointed. But that still doesn’t feel right.
“Thank you for trusting me with that,” he starts, and those words calm my racing heart just a bit. He isn’t about to yell at me for lying to him or run into the next room to tell Sage. “Does she know?” he asks gently.
“God no, I can’t tell her,” I rush out.
He thinks about that for a moment before answering. “Are you worried that she won’t feel the same way?”
I wish that were the case.
I wish that any part of me could believe that she might feel the same way.
That hope would be so much better than the reality.
I never even had a chance. “I know she won’t, she isn’t…
” I trail off, looking around the room as I try to think about how to explain everything.
“Even if she did think about other girls that way, which she doesn’t, we’re both from traditional southern families.
They would never approve, and I’d never ask her to give up her family or their money for me. ”
“Your family would cut you off if they found out you were dating a woman?” he repeats.