3. Finn
3
FINN
Now
“It’s a good thing I love you.”
She’s not saying that to me, but feck… If she was, I’d reply that I love her too, more than anything in the world. I love her with the lusty energy of Irish grass and the deep intensity of the stormy sea, despite having barely met her. Apparently when you meet your soulmate, you just know.
“This is for the best,” she tells me. Or Noah. “You’ll see.”
Easing myself back, I slide to the side and ensure my face isn’t lit by the streetlights as I make myself comfortable.
“You’ve been gambling so much, I’m surprised you’re still employed.”
And yeah, she’s right. Her brother has been a problem. Though, to be fair, I’ve been a touch distracted myself recently. And it happens that I have some sympathy with obsessions that are unhealthy.
“I’m sorry that your job is going to be at risk since you’re not turning up for work tomorrow. I’ll phone the pub and explain. Maybe they’ll understand?”
I consider interrupting her. There are a number of points that she’s very wrong on, and that she thinks I’m her brother is not even the most significant.
She thinks she has kidnapped someone who doesn’t want to be here, and that she has to save her brother. When in fact, I’m all too eager to be with her, and I’ve dealt with her brother.
Ever since I first saw her across the bar in one of the many Kilburn pubs I own, I’ve been compelled to find out everything about her. Following her hasn’t been enough. Befriending her brother, who is a decent guy with a gambling addiction and a lot to learn. Checking on her at her work at the hospital. I’ve been looking for a way to get further into her life, and what she doesn’t know is that we were going to talk tonight, and she’d have come home with me, even if she hadn’t made this reckless move.
I love that she did this for me. For us.
“I met your boss the other day.”
The air is sucked from my lungs.
“He seemed…”
She pauses.
It takes everything in me not to reach over the seat and demand she continue speaking.
“I dunno. He’s a mafia boss, but I didn’t die.” She laughs a bit. “People say he’s a charming playboy with a side of psychosis, but he was…” That thought gets left unfinished, but there’s a note of wistfulness in her tone that gives me hope. “Maybe he’ll keep your barman position open, or give you another.”
His job is safe, and it physically hurts to not be able to reassure her on that point.
“It’s a long drive if you won’t talk to me,” she interrupts my thoughts. “You’re not going to ask where we’re going?”
I am curious about that, and the edge to her voice suggests her brother would have guessed.
“Nothing, Noah?”
She’d be as fierce a mother as any Irish Mammy. She’d be a queen by my side, and I bet she’d be a minx in my bed. I’d already wanted Millie, but now? So much more.
A decent man would tell her everything, and save her the drive to wherever we’re going.
But I have been an amoral bastard from birth, the son of a bad man and stubborn woman. But they’re all in Ireland, and sometimes I feel that lack of family.
Recently more than ever.
It’s since I met Millie. She brings out all the longing for connection rather than more money and power.
There’s a silence, and I fill the time with the fun little challenge of getting the cuffs off. Pretty straightforward, since she didn’t do them up tight. Soft-hearted.
They’re fecking fur lined, which is adorable.
“We’re going to the beach cottage for a week…” That must mean something to Noah, as she doesn’t elaborate.
But a house by the sea sounds excellent. And small will be ideal for us. Somewhere Millie and I can get to know each other? This couldn’t be better if I’d planned it myself.
“It’ll be our last trip.” Her voice trembles. “I don’t think I could bear to come to Northumberland and not go to the cottage.”
I wrack my brains for where we’re going. Northumberland is on the East coast of England, just before you get to Scotland, I think.
“We have to sell it,” she says eventually. “Because of your gambling debts. This is what your addiction has done, Noah. This is why I’ve asked you, and begged you.”
What ? Noah said he had loans, and I arranged for them to be paid, of course. But my sweet pet is making this sacrifice? She’s amazing.
“Are you not even going to reply?” she says, with a touch of annoyance.
I keep my head low and shake it. No.
Not because I don’t feel anything, I do. But because she’s talking to me, and I don’t want that to stop.
“Our parents’ cottage. It’s all we have left of them, and you took it from us.”
My poor pet. I’ll fix this for her, of course I will, just as I’d sort everything she let me.
“Are you not even going to say you’re sorry?”
I should have guessed Millie would have done what was needed to help her brother. My chest aches for her. So strong, despite being tiny. I’d love to see her use that resilience to deal with more pleasurable challenges, not debt and heartbreak. That strength would be perfect for a mafia boss’ wife.
For my wife.
Would she let me give her a family? I’d like that a lot. Her brother is a gobshite, and she deserves better.
She falls silent again, and eventually sighs deeply.
“You might as well sleep.”
As she directs, I lie down. But I don’t sleep. Just listening to her breathing, catching the scent of her apple shampoo, and feeling her presence close by is soothing in a way I’ve never felt before.
I think forward to when we stop.
She’s going to freak out. She accidentally kidnapped the kingpin in control of the part of London she lives in. I have the luxury of being able to plan, and I need to, since a smart girl like her will try to run from me.
I tried charm and seduction when we met, but she’s drained me of any ability to think in her presence. I’m just a morally-grey kingpin, standing before a girl almost half his age, asking her to love him.
Not likely.
But if I insisted. If she thought I was exactly the sort of deadly mafia boss she took me for when I told her my name…
The seed of an idea sprouts and flourishes. What if I turn this kidnapping around? Would she forgive me?
Probably. Orgasms can wear a person down.
She turns on the radio after a while, and apologises. But it only takes a few songs before she’s singing along to Taylor Swift and I’m lying on my back, grinning.
Listening to her is a new joy. I’ve watched from afar, and kept track of her via a hidden app on her phone that her brother kindly and inadvertently passed on when he messaged her. Being close and hearing her voice fills my tattered soul.
I’ve never been kidnapped before. I’ve been missing out.
This is the most fun I’ve had in years.