Chapter 16
Chapter Sixteen
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T IERNEY
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“I honestly don’t know why I’m even crying,” I say to the tub of caramel fudge I’m devouring. “It’s so stupid. Just because they took my virginity and fucked me to the moon and back didn’t mean I had to go and catch feelings.”
Catch feelings . Yuck. It sounds like some highly contagious disease that’ll make you itch in your butt crack. No, thank you. I’m going to eat my tub of ice cream, then eat the other tub of ice cream in my freezer, and then I’m going to write my book. Possible titles besides Keep the Sex Light On are maybe Sex Essential. Or Sexsential .
I finish my ice cream, attack the second tub, and go straight to my desk, uncaring that my hair is still pretty much wet from my hour-long shower and drenching my pajama top. Yes, it’s in the middle of the day. I don’t care.
Right, let’s get this book started. Okay, but where to begin? Notes, I say, clearly high on sugar. I grab my tablet, scan my words, and bawl my eyes out again.
The only thing I said about their cocks? Yummy. Delicious. Addictive. More. When they were touching me and eating from me, a couple of squiggly lines. Something that looks like I was trying to write ‘sublime’ and ‘ultra-sublime. Divine. Celestial.’
All those mind-bending orgasms, and I have no notes to show for it.
Everything is a colossal mess. I get up from the chair and throw myself face-first into the soft, puffy cushion on my sofa. Sweetpea has been an absolute darling, and she’s not even here right now.
She’s with Clem and Honeypot and Haley and Cass at The Lone River Ranch, hosting a massive blind date party for Colter, Nolan, and Jace. I may have planned everything, but when the time came to show up and watch Sweetpea pair them up with the loves of their lives—of course, provided the candidates I chose had a chance in the first place—I could not go.
I also texted them this morning, around 3 hours ago. I thanked them and told them they were off the hook now since I have everything I need. They read my texts but didn’t reply.
I don’t even stir when my doorbell rings. “Go away, whoever you are,” I say, like I’m drunk. I don’t want to see anyone.
“Tierney,” a deep voice says on the other side of the door. “Are you going to open the door, or are we going to have to break it down?”
I shoot up onto my knees. What are they doing here? They were supposed to be at the grand party at their ranch where the finest babes of New York are gathered to meet them.
What are they doing here?
“Open up, beautiful. We have Sweetpea.” And on cue, Sweetpea starts to bark, but not her usual bark when she wants to get my attention. This bark sounds a little coy.
I’m far too disheveled, and unless I’m doing a complete makeover, doing one of two things is not going to improve my appearance. Ice cream stain on my pajama top. My socks are mismatched, and the dry bits of my hair stand to attention in the wrong direction.
Focus. They have Sweetpea. What if something happened? I don’t wait a moment longer to unlock my door. My breath catches en route from my lungs and never makes it out as I take Sweetpea from Colter.
The fur bundle did not want to give up her spot against his chest. Traitor. Sweetpea is clearly fine, and now I turn my attention to them. And all I want to do is start crying all over again.
Did they have to look so deliciously sexy and handsome and rugged and just so beautiful? Wait, they’re wearing suits?
“What are you doing here?” I ask again, then smooth my hair down with one hand while holding Sweetpea in my other. It doesn’t help. It’s still a mess. Sweetpea wriggles her way out of my arms and races to her bed. My hands are now free, so I attempt to make myself decent again and this time pull down my tattered pajama top with such grace it might have been a designer shirt.
“You’re supposed to be at your matchmaking party.”
They were supposed to arrive from Wyoming and walk straight into the blind date party.
“We’re right where we want to be, Tierney,” Colter says.
“What? I don’t understand.”
Seriously, Tierney? Maybe I got my time mixed up. Maybe the party is already over, and they’re returning Sweetpea because she helped them find the loves of their lives. It was probably Justine, Olivia, and Ellie. Stunning. Smart. Sophisticated. And not anything pink in sight.
My heart breaks all over again because I’m me and could never be like them, no matter how much I pretend otherwise. But I know I need to apologize.
“I need to apologize. I know I come on strong, and this is no excuse—”
“Tierney,” Nolan says, but I hold up my hand.
“I need to say this so I can move on. When I was in seventh grade, I had to give a speech at a school function. I looked out into the audience and got the worst case of stage fright you can imagine. I needed help getting off the stage. My parents had to come and help me, and my dad had to carry me off the stage.
“And I was teased mercilessly by this guy, Adam Fletcher, whose father was a senator. He called me Stage Fright Tierney, very original. I decided that the only reason I got scared was because I stopped to think. I hated being that way, so I stopped myself from thinking and now just do everything blindly and all at once.
“It helps with my confidence. If I think too long on something, I’m going to talk myself out of it, so I’m sorry for crash-landing in your life and basically extorting your time and your... cocks while I dangled some land in front of you. I’m sorry for all that. I wasn’t thinking,” I say with a derisive laugh.
“Are you done?” Jace asks.
“I am. And you’re just returning Sweetpea. Thank you. I hope you’ll be very happy together with your brides and, you know, can you send me some pictures of your honeymoon—”