Sunrise
St. Albans — 5:42am
Neither of them admitted they were avoiding sleep.
That would've made it too real.
Instead they stayed curled together beneath blankets on Leah's sofa while London slowly shifted from night into early morning outside the windows.
Because in a few hours, Elle would leave.
Back to New York.
Back to six-hour time differences and FaceTimes freezing halfway through conversations and missing each other in quiet moments neither of them could explain properly to anyone else.
So they stayed awake instead.
Talking.
Touching.
Memorising.
Leah lay stretched across the sofa now with Elle half on top of her, head resting against Leah's chest while soft music played quietly from somewhere in the apartment.
"You know what's evil?" Leah murmured sleepily into her hair.
"What?"
"You leaving."
Elle smiled sadly against her hoodie. "Bit dramatic."
"I'm serious."
"I know."
That was the dangerous thing.
They both knew.
The distance had stopped feeling exciting now.
Now it just hurt.
Leah tightened her arms slightly around her instinctively.
Like she could delay the morning physically if she held on hard enough.
"You realise," Elle murmured softly, "normal people would've slept."
Leah looked down at her. "Normal people aren't in love with girls flying back to New York in four hours."
Silence.
The words sat between them immediately.
Heavy.
Real.
Because that was the first time Leah had actually said it.
Not almost.
Not implied.
Love.
Elle slowly lifted her head from Leah's chest.
Leah looked mildly horrified with herself now, which honestly made it worse.
"I—"
"No," Elle whispered softly.
Leah stopped instantly.
Morning light had started creeping faintly through the apartment windows now, pale and blue against tired eyes and tangled blankets.
And God.
Leah looked heartbreakingly real like this.
Messy blonde hair. Barefoot. Emotionally exhausted from staying awake all night trying not to think about goodbye.
"You love me?" Elle asked quietly.
Leah swallowed once.
Then nodded.
Tiny.
Terrified.
Completely honest.
"Yeah," she admitted softly. "I do."
The vulnerability in her face nearly broke Elle apart completely.
Because Leah Williamson said important things like they physically hurt her to admit.
Like love was something precious and frightening she only handed over carefully.
Elle kissed her before she could get self-conscious about it.
Slow.
Warm.
Emotional in that dangerous early-morning way where everything feels too raw.
When they pulled apart, Leah rested her forehead lightly against hers and laughed weakly under her breath.
"Well," she murmured. "That's inconvenient timing."
Elle smiled instantly despite the ache in her chest.
"You're unbelievable."
"I'm trying to be emotionally vulnerable here."
"You literally dropped an accidental love confession at sunrise."
Leah groaned dramatically and hid her face briefly against Elle's shoulder while she laughed softly.
God.
Elle loved her too.
That was the terrifying part.
Not slowly either.
Suddenly.
Completely.
Like somewhere between Instagram messages and New York rooftops and football stadiums and four-in-the-morning conversations, Leah Williamson had quietly become home.
"You know what's annoying?" Leah murmured against her shoulder.
"What?"
"I had this whole plan."
Elle smiled softly. "For what?"
"Telling you properly."
"Oh?"
Leah nodded once, still hiding slightly.
"There was supposed to be better lighting."
Elle laughed quietly and pulled back enough to look at her properly.
"Leah."
"What?"
"This is perfect."
The emotion that flickered across Leah's face after that nearly undid her entirely.
Outside, rain had finally stopped.
London sat quiet and grey beneath early morning skies while two exhausted girls stayed awake on a sofa because neither of them wanted to waste a single second before goodbye.
Eventually silence settled softly between them again.
Not awkward.
Just sad now.
Because time was moving.
The clock on Leah's oven read 6:03am.
Three hours until Heathrow.
Leah noticed Elle looking toward it and immediately tightened her hold around her waist again.
"Nope."
Elle laughed softly. "That's not how planes work."
"Don't care."
"You're very clingy for an England captain."
Leah looked at her seriously. "You are literally leaving the continent."
Fair point.
Elle kissed her again slowly.
And maybe that was the worst part about this whole thing:
every goodbye already felt like losing something important.