Chapter Thirty #2
“Third time in a week,” he complained, still slightly breathless from whatever nightmare had been plaguing him.
He barely ever remembered them when he woke, which was a blessing. Still, though, James knew that they were about the sinking. He wondered when or whether he’d ever be free of them. He never could fall back asleep easily after he had one.
Cassian pulled him in for a backward embrace and kissed his shoulder. Guilt twisted in James’s stomach as he settled back against Cassian’s chest.
“I should start sleeping in a separate room,” James said.
“Absolutely not,” Cassian said, hugging him even more. “I like our middle of the night cuddling.”
He let out a yawn, and James frowned.
“You’re exhausted, though.”
“I’m perfectly fine. You have to forgive me for seeming a little sleepy considering the fact that I was sleeping mere moments ago.”
“You still ought to be sleeping. It’s not fair of me to keep you awake like this.”
Cassian pressed another kiss to James’s shoulder and then one to his cheek before burying his face in the crook of James’s neck and mumbling something that sounded like “lifeboat.” Rolling his eyes, James let out a fast breath through his nose.
“Ridiculous,” he said.
Only moments later, as James was taking a couple of cleansing breaths, he heard the lovely sound of Cassian’s soft snores.
Poor man. James shut his eyes and prayed that sleep would somehow find him.
Minutes passed. More and more of them. Finally, James thought he might as well slip out of Cassian’s hold so that Cassian could lie down properly.
As soon as he moved, though, Cassian woke.
“I fell back asleep, didn’t I?” he asked.
“You did, but I was happy to see it.”
“No, no, I should be holding you.”
“You are holding me.”
“Holding you and keeping you company.”
James sighed.
“Should we read something?” he suggested. “Like last time?”
“Yes. Actually, no.” Cassian pushed James off of him. “No, I have a better idea.”
He rolled out of bed, his feet sounding heavy when they hit the floor, and then switched on the lamp. He began to fumble for his robe.
“What are you doing?” James asked.
“Getting something from the first floor.”
James rubbed the sleep from his eyes.
Yawning, he said, “I brought up more lubrication already.”
Cassian let out a low chuckle. “Not that. Believe it or not, I’m perfectly satisfied from our escapades earlier this evening.”
“Alright, what is it then?”
“You’ll see.”
James flopped back onto the mattress as Cassian left the room. Folding his hands atop his chest, he listened to the floorboards creak as Cassian walked to the stairs. Minutes later, Cassian returned with the notebook he’d been writing in earlier.
“Here you go, my James,” he said, handing James the notebook as he clambered back onto the bed. James sat up. Immediately, Cassian pulled James in for another backward hug, encouraging James to use him as a pillow. “Now you can write more of that sailor and pirate story for me.”
James wrinkled his nose.
“But we lost the whole first part of it in the sinking,” he complained. “You know how I feel about writing ahead of what I have.”
Cassian said, “Open the notebook.”
James opened it to where Cassian had placed a pen. Scrawled across the page was what looked like a poorly written, bastardized version of the first chapter of his story. James’s eyes filled with tears, a swell of fondness rising in his chest.
“You wrote this?” he choked out.
“You have to fix it later, but yes, I wrote it. I wrote it so that you could continue from where we left off back in the stateroom,” he said. “I’d like to know what happens.”
James shifted his positioning so he and Cassian could share a kiss. After only half a second, though, he broke it and let out a small sob, some tears finally escaping.
“You rewrote it. I can’t believe you rewrote it,” he said, sniffling. “And you rewrote it so poorly.”
Cassian pinched James’s stomach, causing James to startle as he laughed through another sob. But then Cassian chuckled a bit, too, obviously not irritated by James’s insult.
“I love you,” James said. “You’re always, always surprising me somehow.”
Rubbing a thumb across one of James’s cheeks, Cassian said, “Such a sensitive soul.”
He said it like it was both an insult (albeit a playful one) and a compliment, and James had to fight to keep himself from crying some more. After a couple more swipes of his thumb, Cassian picked up the pen and put it in James’s hand.
“Alright, now that you’ve composed yourself a little, I’d like for you to continue on with the next chapter,” he said. “What happens to the sailor after he pleasures himself to the thought of our handsome Frederick?”
Sniffling once more, James smiled and looked back at the page.
“Uhm, well, I think it’ll be morning. And maybe Frederick can come visit him?” James said. “But they’ll only talk, though. I can’t have them be intimate so soon.”
“So, maybe this is when the sailor will see that the pirate isn’t all bad?”
James looked back at Cassian, and they smiled at each other. James’s stomach swooped as Cassian squeezed him tighter, and then James laughed warmly.
“Yes, I think so,” he said.
Cassian pressed a kiss to his cheek.
“Go on and write something,” he said in a slightly commanding tone, one that still had the power to make James swoon a bit. “I’m not letting us stay awake the whole night.”
With a playful roll of his eyes, James began to write.
Never before had he felt so loved.