Chapter 27
Cooper
It is almost twelve hours since Luna kissed me (and I kissed her back) in my house, but my phone has no messages or calls from her.
I almost want to go to Kingston to see her in person, talk it out with her and let her know that I made a mistake letting her go all those years ago.
But I don’t. I want to give her space to process everything that happened between us and think about how she feels, but I am also afraid that the kiss last night was a momentary act of nostalgia and that she doesn’t still love me or want me back.
I shake my head and hope that I am able to shake the thoughts out of it, too, but I open my phone moments later and go through the photos of Luna and me from when we were together.
We looked happy and young, and in love. I lock my phone and groan, realising that I am a grown thirty-year-old adult male going through the photos with my ex-girlfriend and yearning.
My therapist would not be thrilled to hear about this.
I need to wait this out for a few days and contact her so that we can talk about this like adults.
I go through my morning routine like a well-oiled machine and pack my bag to visit the gallery for a couple of hours.
Today is my day off, to work on painting new art in my studio – with the high-quality paints that Leo ever so kindly gives me a staff discount for, even though I don’t work there anymore – but I get out of my house to get fresh air and distract myself from the recurring thoughts of Luna and her lips.
I spend half an hour returning emails from buyers, and I simultaneously ignore the constant requests to buy my painting of Luna titled ‘Her’ that I had hung up in my gallery until a few days back.
I decided to give Luna the painting, and it belongs to her, whether she wants it or not.
I package the other paintings which have been sold and give a hand to my team of four amazing employees whenever they need me.
I text Shiva to catch him up on the catastrophic updates of my love life, and his supportive responses soothe my wounds.
The day goes by painfully, and Leo comes into my office with a strawberry milkshake in one hand and a banana milkshake in the other. ‘Well, well, well. Look what the cat dragged in.’ He snarls at me.
I grab the strawberry milkshake from his hand and sip on it to soothe my anxiety. ‘How did you know I was here?’
‘The concerned messages I was receiving from your employees, saying they saw you come in to the office on your day off with a long face, might have helped.’
‘Right.’ I let out a long sigh.
‘Are you ready to stop pouting and actually go talk to her?’ His tone reminds me of a teacher talking to their student.
‘I don’t want to push her into talking,’ I respond.
‘Okay, fair. You are not helping anything by being here either. Will you please go back home and give yourself time to process things?’ He is moments away from grabbing me and walking me home.
‘Okay, I will. And, thanks for the milkshake.’ I stand from my chair and put my laptop into my bag.
‘I got you, Coop.’
I walk back home; my mind still riddled with questions about Luna. Once I reach my doorstep, I look down to pull my keys from my pocket, but my eye catches on the envelope lying on my doormat, addressed to me. I pick it up warily, wait until I unlock the door and get inside, then open it.
I get the knife from the kitchen and swipe through the seam of the envelope. I unfold the letter and immediately recognise the handwriting.
Hi Cooper,
I am sorry for running away from you multiple times. I was running away from a lot of things internally, and I had to come to terms with them.
The truth is, I still love you, of course I do.
I don’t think that was ever a question. You were the first person to make me feel seen and loved and gave me space to slowly open up, after Apollo’s death.
Even in these two days we interacted (after seven years of not talking), you have made me feel safe and understood.
I was furious at you, thinking that it was easy for you to let go of me, but now I understand that it was a choice that you believed had to be made.
I don’t want to deny the fact that your choice caused me pain, but I can find it in my heart to forgive you.
Why is why I can’t do this in person. But I can’t go without telling you either. I am leaving tomorrow for my mission. I am scared out of my mind, but maybe I can find comfort in the fact that you will watch over me from your balcony.
Thank you for showing me the painting, Cooper. It was cosmic. I will always be proud of you and will root for you to become more famous and for more people to love and cherish your work, as I do.
I will always think of you.
With love,
Luna <3
My brain runs a million miles an hour; emotions overwhelm me. I grab my car keys, lock the door behind me and run down the stairs. My phone almost slips out of my hand as my finger rapidly clicks the buttons to call Luna’s Dad. I need to find her before it’s too late.