Chapter 20
20
N avya reread the last few messages she’d exchanged with Armaan.
Armaan, I’m going to Cub Poseidon with Ananya. I miss you. I wish you were here with me.
I wish I was there too. Miss you…
Why have we never gone out at night? Why haven’t we gone on a real date ever?
You want to go out on a date?
Yes.
Why?
Of course, he’d ask her that. She hadn’t given him too much confidence after she’d told him she would think about his proposal. He’d looked so lost after she’d asked him for more time. She breathed out. What was wrong with her? It’s not like she wasn’t already invested in him. She was. But the words—commitment, long-term, and promises—made everything more real, thus increasing the possibility of her getting hurt. After all, didn’t all the problems in a relationship start once you got committed.
She quickly put her phone in her bag. From beside her, Ananya was ordering their drinks at the bar. They were upstairs, in the private section of Club Poseidon. She assembled her thoughts while waiting for Ananya to get free.
She thought through everything. She had genuinely wanted to spend a night with him. They hadn’t ever done that. And it was probably selfish of her to suggest that right now, when so much remained unanswered between them. The truth, however, was that needed him around to think—to gain clarity. The only time everything made sense was when he was around. Maybe spending the night with him would have given her the push she needed to jump off the cliff and explore the frightening unknown with him.
Her heart sped. And just like that, all her old fears resurfaced, overwhelming her. This was what happened each time she analysed their relationship when she was away from him. She was terrified of getting hurt, of being a dreaded casualty of the consequences of love, just as her birth mother had been. The easiest solution to her dilemma would be to stop meeting him. To tell him it was over and that she didn’t want anything more from him. But then, even the mere thought of letting go of Armaan made her chest hurt badly.
He had wound his way into her life so deeply that even imagining a day without him was so hard now. Her heart clenched. Which meant that there was only one option left. It was one thing to have a secret romance with him, but telling everyone… meant the beginning of more. She exhaled. She needed to talk to someone, and that is why she’d insisted on a sisters’ night out with Ananya.
She had to confide in Ananya, and she’d wanted to do it away from home, somewhere outside where Ananya wouldn’t create a fuss. Of course, Ananya would, in all possibility, get mad at her, but she was less likely to create a scene in public. Nevertheless, Navya needed her elder sister’s help in understanding what she was going through. Ananya had been in a relationship once, and she’d definitely be able to help her navigate this situation with Armaan.
Sighing, Navya looked around. Club Poseidon was packed as always. In fact, tonight, it seemed busier. The bartender was taking a long time to get them their drinks.
Ananya finally handed her a vodka soda. “So, why the sudden plan to come to Club Poseidon?”
“It’s a Friday night, and I just wanted some sister time,” Navya said.
Ananya sipped her drink. “Honestly, I’m not complaining. It’s been too long since I’ve done anything like this. This feels good.”
Which was true. Ananya rarely ever went out anywhere these days. She was too immersed in her work all the time.
Club Poseidon was easily one of their favorite nightclubs in Dubai, especially considering their brother owned the place. Her eyes coasted over the crowd. In the distance and below her, she could make out people dancing on the floor. Around her, the VIP section was also more crowded than usual. There were a lot of foreigners around. Her eyes paused on a couple dancing near the railing in front of her. The man had his back to Navya. The woman with him had her arms wrapped around him, whispering in his ear as they grooved to the music, looking totally lost in each other. How would she and Armaan look dancing like that?
Her chest pinched. She looked at the couple again. She and Armaan had never, not once, gone out in public together. God. Suddenly, she ached for him to be here. She ached to spend an entire night with him in his bed and wake up in the morning with him. She wanted to begin and end her days with him. Her chest constricted. Oh, what was happening to her? It was all so damn confusing.
The couple she’d been staring at parted. The man returned to his group and the lady looked in her direction, her eyes meeting Navya’s. Navya recognized her in an instant. No wonder Navya was curious about that particular couple on the dance floor. It was Rehana with some man—maybe the elusive boyfriend she had been talking about these last few weeks. Seeing Navya, the model approached her.
Navya stood from the barstool to greet her. Rehana air kissed her cheeks.
“Navya, habibti ,” Rehana chirped. “There you are. I’ve been looking for you. You’re late.”
Shit. Navya had completely forgotten that she’d gotten entry for Rehana and her friends here for tonight.
“Hi, Rehana. I hope you managed to get in easily and that you’ve got a good table as well. Are you enjoying yourselves?”
“Yes, yes. Many thanks. We are having a great time,” Rehana said. “This VIP section is fabulous, and the DJ is just awesome.” Her eyes swept past Navya and landed on Ananya.
Navya ushered her sister forward. “This is my elder sister, Ananya. And Ananya, I’m sure you know Rehana Haddad, the famous model.”
Rehana extended her hand out. “You seem familiar.”
“I’m the owner and editor of Noir Fashion Magazine,” Ananya said.
Rehana gave Navya a scathing look. “You failed to mention this when we were discussing this magazine a few weeks ago.” She turned to Ananya. “I read your article on the top models in the world. Why was I not featured in it?”
Oh no. This was why Navya needed to pay more attention to everything around her. Had she remembered that Rehana would be here tonight then she wouldn’t have brought Ananya to the same nightclub. Rehana had a solid temper and an ego the size of a hill, and Ananya enjoyed sparring with people with huge egos and putting them down a notch or two. An altercation between Ananya and Rehana was the last thing she needed when Navya’s career was going so great, thanks to this one model.
Before she could say anything, Ananya smiled. “Well, my next article will be on the top models in the Middle East, and if you’re willing, then we could do a cover with you.”
Rehana’s eyes glittered, and then her blood-red lips curved. “That sounds fine. Navya has the contact of my assistants. You can get in touch with them to schedule a discussion.”
“I look forward to that,” Ananya replied.
That was easy. Navya had barely breathed a sigh of relief when Rehana ran a cutting gaze down Ananya and said, “You’re too thin. However, you have good bone structure. You should use your sister’s assistance to dress better.”
Ananya’s face hardened at the model’s derisive comment, but before she could give an equally biting reply, Navya stepped up. “Rehana, was that your boyfriend back there with you?”
Rehana pointed to the railing, where a tall man was leaning, looking into the crowd. “Yes, that’s him.”
Navya couldn’t see him clearly through the glaring lights of the club. The man turned his head to the side. She squinted. Something about him looked familiar.
Before she could lean to get a better look, Rehana said, “Talking about boyfriends, where is Armaan? I thought he’d be coming tonight. Weren’t we to double date?”
From next to her, Ananya choked on her drink. She gave Navya a thunderous look. Shit. This wasn’t the way Navya had wanted to announce her situation with Armaan.
“Armaan couldn’t make it. I think your boyfriend is calling you,” Navya quickly told the model.
Rehana left them with a cheerful goodbye and more air kisses. The second she was gone, Ananya dragged her to a side corridor near the washrooms. The sound of the music was relatively muted here.
“I knew it,” Ananya fumed. “I knew that something was up when you kept insisting on going out. Is he coming tonight? Are you using me as an excuse to meet him?”
“Wait, why will I need to do that? I can meet him whenever I want to.”
“I don’t know what you’re thinking, Navya,” Ananya scolded.
Navya wiped her suddenly clammy hands on the folds of her dress. “I have to tell you something, and you have to promise not to freak out because I’m freaking out already as it is.”
Ananya pursed her lips. “My mind is conjuring up various scenarios. None of them nice. So, talk fast.”
“I kind of slept with Armaan.”
Ananya’s eyes narrowed. “Kind of? What the hell is kind of? Can you be more specific?”
Navya exhaled. “I slept with Armaan, and it wasn’t just once.”
Ananya’s eyes rounded. “What?” She shook her head. “Bloody fucking hell. What is wrong with you? Have you lost your mind?”
“I told you not to freak out.”
“And I told you to stay away from him. Yet, here we are.”
“I couldn’t stay away from him. I tried, but…”
“…but you couldn’t resist his bad boy charm. How long has this been going on?”
“A couple of weeks, no a month maybe,” Navya said.
“Why?”
“What do you mean why?”
“Why are you dating him?” Ananya asked. “Why are you sleeping with him? It couldn’t have been on a whim.”
“I think I like him, kind of.”
“Again, kind of? I hate it when you’re vague like this. It’s misleading and annoying.”
Navya threw her hands up. “I’m confused, Ananya. That’s why I brought you here, to talk to you. To seek help from you on what I ought to do next.”
Ananya studied her. “Navya, what are you saying exactly? Are you in love with him? Is that why you are confused?”
Her heart twisted.
“I don’t know what is happening to me. I don’t know what I feel.” She shook her head. “I can’t be in love with him. He’s everything I don’t want in a man. He’s too fucking rich, too damn arrogant, and too damn stubborn. But he’s also so damn gorgeous, and his body… uff, when he touches me, I totally lose my mind. But…”
Ananya cut her off. “You forgot to add that he’s a known womanizer, and you’re what, his current lover? Do you really believe he will give you a forever? That he won’t betray you with another woman? Do you really believe that he won’t be like your birth father? Do you trust him not to hurt you? Do you trust him to let you go if you don’t want to be with him? You know he’s dangerous.”
But he was also thoughtful, tender, and caring. He was actually perfect, so Goddamn perfect that it made her worry if he was too good to be true. Shit, what if he was presenting her a fa?ade? What if the fa?ade disappeared and, like her birth father, he showed his true colors once she’d fallen completely in his trap? Her chest hurt even thinking about that. She didn’t want to be a victim like her birth mother had been.
A stone dropped in her stomach. She didn’t want to live with the bitter trauma of being hurt by the person she loved the most in the world. It would destroy her, just like it had destroyed the woman who had birthed her.
Her heart stumbled. Her fears swamped her, taking over her mind. Memories of her traumatic childhood overwhelmed her so much that she couldn’t breathe.
“What is wrong with me?” she rasped. “You’re right. He’s a known philanderer, a heartbreaker. Of course, he will cheat on me. A man like him doesn’t know how to be faithful. Oh God. I can’t fall for him. I won’t love him. I am not in love with him, and he’s not the one for me.”
“Then what the hell are you doing with him?” Ananya asked.
“I’d like an answer to that as well.”
Navya whirled around, her chest tightening at the sound of Armaan’s stilted voice. He was standing right behind her, his arms crossed on his chest, a mixture of hurt and anger flashing on his face.
She moved toward him, and he backed a step away.
“Stay where you are and answer your sister,” he barked.
She tipped her head to stare at him. He was vibrating with fury, his expression rigid, immovable. This wasn’t the Armaan she’d gotten to know in the past weeks. He was replaced by this cold, hard man who was staring at her like she was a stranger. She hated it. She wanted the other Armaan back, the one who always smiled at her, the one who looked at her like she meant more than the sun, the moon, and the stars to him. The one who made her happy. And she had been happy with him. Deliriously so.
Memories of the past few weeks spent with him flashed in her mind’s eye and with that came a profound realization. She pressed a hand to her rumbling chest. Her heart was telling her that it was at ease now that he was in front of her. That it always felt at ease around him. That being with him felt like coming home. That he made her feel safe, protected and cherished. That she was utterly happy when she was with him. Only him.
Oh God, Armaan was her home. He was her safe place—a haven to rest at the end of a long day and a place where she could voice her innermost feelings without the fear of being judged. Maybe, she ought to have thought through everything properly before speaking the way she had, because the truth was that his mere presence eased her doubts and worries. All the questions she battled with when she was away from him vanished into thin air. What remained was the intrinsic belief was that he was important to her, and that perhaps, she was wrong about everything.
Meeting him had been the most pivotal moment of her life. For years, she hadn’t forgotten him, and then fate had put her into his path again. She and him had been preordained by the stars. It was kismet, and now, standing in front of him, she was finally beginning to realize this.
At her silence, he turned, walking away. Something poked against her ribcage. It was her heart reminding her that a crucial piece of her was leaving. And if she allowed him to go, then the world would never be the same again.
Which meant… it meant that… Fuck, she was in love with Armaan Oshnov, and right now, he believed the complete opposite.
She was such a fool.