30. Muster
Chapter 30
Muster
Haley
I ’m using Calvin’s bare chest as a pillow. And it feels so domestic, like it’s Sunday morning and we’re going to lie in bed and read. But this is Calvin, and the only reason he is lying asleep behind me is because he kept the fire and watch going all night.
What would it be like to have Calvin as a boyfriend? He’d probably be an early riser, no pancakes and sleeping in. No, he’d have the garage cleaned and the lawn mown by nine a.m. I laugh out loud. Me with a lawn?
Last night, nestled between Easton and Zane, shoot, I wanted to move. I wanted to rub myself all over both of them. But the sun, wind, and big meal all made me so sleepy I fell asleep before anything happened.
But now I’m not tired.
“Good morning,” Calvin says into my ear, close enough to be a kiss. I lift my head, and our lips are inches apart. I don’t move away. I want him to kiss me.
“Good morning. How was the night shift?”
He lifts his head, giving a bit of distance. “More of nothing.” He squeezes me to him. “How were the sleeping arrangements?” Calvin’s hand lands on my bare back, where my shirt has ridden up. His thumb rubs lazy circles on my back, and I know I should get up. But as long as he’s rubbing circles, I’m not moving. I’m mesmerized by his touch.
A low moan rumbles, and it takes a minute for me to realize I’m the one making it. This might be the first time I’ve been comfortable since I left Fort Lauderdale. No, longer, since in Florida I was too busy crying over seeing fucking Steven and his new girl at my favorite diner. Now I can never go there. I laugh, because I can never go there again anyway, or to any other restaurant. Not when I’m stuck on a deserted island with four guys who watch me like they either want to fuck me or tie me up for safety. Or maybe just tie me up. I shouldn’t find that so hot, but I do.
I hitch my leg up over Calvin’s, and he moves his large leg in between my thighs.
Oh, it feels so good. Not even moving, the pressure my own weight is putting on my clit pushed into his leg is enough to send me almost over the edge.
“Take what you need, little one.” His voice rumbles through his chest.
My eyes widen. He can’t mean what he’s saying, can he?
His teeth scrape along his lip. Our skin is glowing red from the light coming through the raft cover. He lifts his leg, changing the angle against my clit. I let out a moan.
“Take it.”
I slide my hand down his chest toward his cock.
But he snags my wrist, holding my hand to his chest. “Take it, Haley.” His deep, thick voice has me rock forward. I catch his intense eyes. “That’s it. Do it.” He says it the way one dares someone to shoot back a shot or stuff three hot dogs into their mouth. He doesn’t know it, but I’m not one to leave a dare on the table. I rock forward. The first thrust of my hips has me shaking. I want to run away, but Calvin holds my hand at his stomach. “We all have needs, Haley. You’re not going off into the woods to hide behind a tree.”
I lift my head, and my body follows. More friction against my clit. “Is that what you do?”
“No.” His smile melts me, and at the same time I’m ashamed. “Haley, I don’t hide from anyone. Roll over.” It’s a command, not a request.
I freeze for a second. Am I drawing a line in the sand? Am I picking Calvin above all the other guys?
“Roll over. This is about you, not me. Roll over.” His voice is like a rough wave over me. “I’m getting you off, not asking you to go steady.”
My insides are shaking at how matter of fact he is. Like it’s a task on his list: get firewood, carve utensils, make a boat, and finger Haley. But my body rolls on its own. And his hand slides down my chest. His hand is rough, and when he slides it under the elastic of my panties, I turn away. The doubt shows on my face. His other hand grasps my chin, turning my face to his. He kisses me. His lips pull at mine, his tongue demanding entrance. When I let him in, he circles my clit. I mew into his mouth. My hips lift to his hand.
I want more. His kiss is firm. Demanding. I want to touch him too. When I try, he releases my chin and grabs my hand before I can, pinning it above my head. He breaks the kiss.
“This is about you.” His fingers are still stroking my clit. He stares at me. His eyes are purple in the filtered light of the raft’s canopy. “Understood?”
I nod, unable to speak. I tilt my pelvis up to him again.
And he laughs. “What do you want, Haley?”
“More.”
“More what?”
“Move your finger.”
He takes his finger out of my pants. I turn my head. I should get up. Go anywhere and finish myself.
“What should I do with my finger?” he asks.
“Fuck me with it.” I bite out the words.
“My pleasure.” His hand is back in my underwear, drawing lazy circles around my clit. And then he has two fingers in me, or maybe it’s one, his hand is so big. His other hand is on my breast. My eyes are shut. It’s too much. Too much sensation everywhere. He pinches my nipple and then leans across my body. He sucks my nipple through my shirt.
I’m trembling. He’s everywhere. And something happens that never does: all thoughts stop; it’s only his body doing things to mine. My lists of things I need to do are gone, along with plans for the future. I have no longing, no past, no trepidation about the future. It’s only this moment, with how he is playing my body, that has any meaning. My body shakes with the rhythm of his hand, and I shoot off, the euphoric sensation unlike any orgasm I’ve ever had.
I’m sweating from places I didn’t know could sweat. The plastic of the raft sticks to my back from where my shirt has ridden up. I’m destroyed and wrung out.
Calvin leans over me, his body blocking the rose-colored light. He’s extraordinarily proud, and there’s almost a smile on his face. He kisses my nose, wiggles his eyebrows at me, and sticks his fingers in his mouth, licking them.
I suck my lips into my mouth and watch him.
“Feel better?”
I nod. My throat is too dry to speak. He smooths my hair down. I’m reliving the last few minutes. “Did I scream?”
Calvin’s pulling up his shorts. “No.”
I exhale.
“But if you’re asking if the others heard, I say yes. But it’s like I said, Haley—everyone has needs. And I’m sure they’re all off taking care of theirs.” He does smile this time. And it almost makes me reach up and grab him around his neck, pulling him back to me. If they heard, I might as well do it all the way.
But Calvin is too fast. He’s already out of the raft. A second later, he sticks his head back in. “You should rest a little more. I’ll have Dante bring you some breakfast.” And he drops the flap on the door.
I stare at where he disappeared. What the heck have I done to myself now? I could go back to sleep, but I should tend the fire. That’s something I can do sitting down. I twist my leg. The silly ankle is still tender, but the swelling is dropping. At least, I think it is. I straighten myself out and crawl to the opening.
Easton’s there. “I thought I heard you... crawling out.”
“Nice save.” I purse my lips. His handsome grin has the flutters returning.
He laughs. “Can I help you out?”
“Please.”
Easton scoops me out of the raft, and Dante’s there with my crutch, placing it under my arm. There’s a scowl on his face. “Sleep well?” he asks, sarcasm dripping from his lips.
“I...” I settle on one of the sitting rocks around the fire, taking the fire-tending stick from where Dante is sitting.
“Relax, Haley, Dante’s being a dick.” Easton hands me a cup of water.
“I do have one, you know. We all do. But I think Haley knows that already.” Dante tends the coconut on his rock grill.
“Seriously Dante, don’t be a douche.” Easton looks at me and back at Dante.
Calvin and Zane aren’t on the beach, unless they are on the little part of the beach I can’t see hidden behind the raft. The ocean is calm today. The sky is light blue with big fluffy white clouds. There’s nothing out on the horizon. Just like there’s been nothing out on the horizon for the past few days. I focus on the water in the little cup. The cup is only mostly waterproof, and the water drips out, puddling in my hands and dripping down my leg.
“I’m going to get more water from the stream.” Easton points at Dante. “Don’t be an ass.”
“But that’s my specialty of the day: coconut, pork, and ass.” Dante looks up at me.
Easton pauses, one of the two plastic water pitchers we have in his hand. “I’m going to go. Unless you want me to stay?”
“I’m fine.” I give Easton a fraction of a smile. He nods and heads to the opening in the woods. I watch him go and then glance at the ocean. I want to get cleaned up, but it’s low tide and the water is far away. My ankle doesn’t look as good out in the daylight. And I really want to be healed by the time we’re rescued. “How’s the smoked meat?”
Dante stands up straighter. His hand goes to his head.
“Whoa. Are you okay?” I reach for him.
“Yeah, my head is still throbbing. And the ringing in my ears is not going away. I’m a little lightheaded. But you tell Easton and...” Dante points at me with a large wooden spoon.
I put my hands up in surrender. “I won’t. I swear.”
“Good.” He takes a small bundle of banana leaves from a new log that’s behind him. “We’re finishing up the rest of the fresh meat today. I want to save the smoked meat for when it’s raining or something. But here, try a piece.” He places a small sliver of the meat in the middle of my hand. “It’s not a beef jerky you get from a convenience store.”
I stare at the shriveled piece of meat, but then I pop it into my mouth and chew on it. It’s tough but tasty. “It’s good.”
“You don’t have to lie to me, Haley. It’s edible. But I know I can do better.”
I lean forward with my elbows on my knees. “Thank you. Are you sure you shouldn’t have Easton take a look at you again?”
“What’s he going to do? I’m not going to take any more of the pain pills. We need to save them. I’ll make do.”
I nod. If this had happened on the boat, I would have a pocket full of ibuprofen. But it’s a sprain; it hurts, but it will get better.
I poke at the fire while Dante scrapes the coconut and some meat into a coconut shell. He holds it out but doesn’t let go when I put my hand around the bottom. “Thank you.”
He’s standing over me. “I know you and I got off on the wrong foot. No pun intended.” He glances down at my ankle. “But if something happens that you don’t want, I will rip that person apart. I don’t care if they’re faster than me or built like a truck—I will end them. Do I make myself clear?” His eyes are wide, and when he lets go of the bowl, my insides are shaking. I’m caught completely off-guard and have no idea what to say.
He comes back with a spoon and hands it to me. I take it from him, and he nods. He moves a few pieces of wood next to me, piles coals on top of his cooking rock, and adds a few other logs. “Can you mind the fire? I’ll be back in ten minutes.” He almost smiles at me. “Probably less.”
“Sure. I’m happy to help. I can keep it going if you want to lie down?”
His eyes flash like he wants to ask me something else, but he doesn’t. “I’ll be right back. Unless you don’t need me? Then I might poke around and see if there are any edible plants.”
“Oh, I’d love to help you with that.” I shrug. “Some other time, though. Have fun.” My heart is thudding in my chest. I eat my breakfast slowly. I’ve got a bit of a headache too. But that’s most likely my caffeine addiction smacking me across the head. I find myself reaching for my phone, but it’s in the water bag in the raft. Turned off.
I follow a pattern: eat a few bites, watch the horizon. For a second, I think I see something. But it’s gone. A log or a whale maybe, but it’s gone not long after I look. Fire, bite, watch, over and over.
I’m eating my last bite when Easton comes from the woods, the container of water in one hand and arm full of firewood. He drops the firewood next to the empty smoking racks. “Hey.” He gives me a chin nod.
“Hi.”
“How was breakfast?” Easton puts the water on the rock and covers it with the little scrap of fabric we’ve been using to keep bugs out. It’s amazing how fast we’re developing systems. We’re all drinking the water from the stream now, since we don’t have a way to boil the amount of water we need. The raft wasn’t stocked with supplies for in case you find land.
“Really good.” I hold the little cup upside down.
“Good.” He reaches for the cup.
I don’t give it up. “It’s fine. I need something to do.”
“It’s no problem.” The way he says it tells me he’s been assigned babysitting duty.
“Right. What’s going on? Where are Calvin and Zane?” I shake my head, looking back at the woods, not letting go of my cup. I can wait for the tide to pull the water in.
“They’re gathering firewood. They’ll be back soon.” Easton puts another log on the fire.
“Fine.”
Dante’s gone most of the morning. Easton bustles around the beach, building the help sign bigger, checking on the mound we have ready if we see something. The flare gun is near me since I’m watching the horizon. But Easton makes a few more grease-dipped fire starters for the cold pile of the signal fire. Around lunch, Zane shows up and Easton disappears.
Zane gives me the same answer. “Nothing, bird, we’re just gathering firewood.”
I squint at him, and he sits next to me. I’ve been yachting too long to not know when I’m being left out of something. But asking him if they’re in the woods jacking off isn’t going to happen.
Calvin trades with Zane, but instead of moving firewood, Calvin catches us two fish. The silly things practically jump onto his hook. He guts them on the rock next to me. He’s back to mostly grunting at me.
The sun is dropping out of the sky by the time everyone is back and we’re eating the fish and coconut in our little bowls, with a few scraps of pork. The guys are silent.
“What the hell is going on?” I look up from my fish, which is amazing. I’m grateful, but I’m not going to live like this, with them keeping secrets.
“Well, are you going to tell her?” Easton puts his hand on my leg.
“Tell me? Tell me what?” I glare at Calvin.