Chapter 7
Brendan
My heart beats with a slow and heavy rhythm, my eyes sweeping up and down the length of Ky’s naked body. Last night we spent our first night together, sharing my worn-out old bed, laying in these thread-bare sheets.
Everyone is out—Daisy’s gone on a bender, and Bruce is up in Sydney moving product.
Even Stacey isn’t here, staying at her friend’s place for the weekend.
The house is empty and quiet for once, which unnerves me as much as it calms me.
Me and Ky are truly together now, and there’s no denying it.
If I’m being honest, I’ve been falling for him since the first day we became mates.
But that night on the beach six months ago, when we started kissing, well, since then, I’ve known for sure how I really feel.
Ky makes me feel alive and wild and reckless and I hate it as much as I love it.
This is the first time we’ve been fully naked in front of each other. The first time fucking without a shred of clothing to hide behind.
Although Ky’s had me stripped bare for so long now. He slithered beneath my shirt and took up residence under my skin. He never asked permission and I sure as fuck didn’t give my consent. But that’s how it is, even though we don’t talk about it.
His body fascinates me—his sun-kissed golden skin and the long lean muscles.
The V defining his hips and the ripples of his washboard abs.
It’s all ridiculously perfect and I can’t believe I’m gifted this moment to just drink him in.
Drown, get drunk. Because I’ve never been able to truly look before.
We normally steal moments with our jeans still around our ankles, using shadows as cover.
But last night was intimate and tender and I thought I might actually die from my racing heart.
I’d laid down on my back with my legs spread wide, shoving down my shame because I wanted him that damn much.
Then Ky’s weight was on top of me, and he cradled my face and captured my eyes with his.
We’d kissed and kissed as we’d fucked, and then I’d watched his beautiful face as he’d come undone.
Ky’s still sound asleep, lying on his back with one knee bent, foot resting against his calf.
One arm rests on the pillow above his head.
I smile. He’s gonna have some serious pins and needles when he wakes.
My eyes settle on his long blonde eyelashes and the few faint freckles across the bridge of his nose.
He’s got the prettiest lips, and I want to reach out and trace them with my finger.
But not yet. Right now, I feel peaceful, as if time is standing still.
We had a perfect night, and my sore ass is a testament to that. I like the residual pain because I can take it away with me. It’s my secret as I go about my day, thinking about how I felt with him deep inside me.
I bite down on my bottom lip, a blush creeping up my neck at the thought of the things we did to each other. Ky’s seen every part of me and has laid his fingers and tongue and mouth upon them. Gently and lovingly and hard and wanting.
The fear of being caught is always with me, but there’s no playing safe anymore.
There’s no going back to the way it was.
I can’t keep Ky at arm’s length anymore.
He’s always pushing, always wanting more than I can give.
But that’s Ky, whose eyes can change from a cold, ice blue to warm, sparkling aqua depending on his mood.
But no matter the shade, he always looks at me like no one else does—like I’m someone—and that shit’s addictive.
I inch a little closer, looking at the blonde hair on his legs.
His legs are so fucking long now. When did he get so tall?
Ky’s changing before my eyes, transforming into a man.
He’s in metamorphosis, and I think he will emerge as something far beyond my reach.
Jaw widening. Strength increasing. Ambition soaring.
He always holds me tight when we fuck, like he’s scared I’ll make a run for it.
I snort. As if I’d ever run from Kyle. To Kyle, maybe.
I never wanted anything until I wanted Kyle Davies.
I was content with my shitty lot in life, and he ruined that.
Now I want what I can’t have, and that’s dangerous. But this, right now, is perfect.
I didn’t kiss Ky for the longest time because it seemed too gay. And I was right all along—kissing is for fags. When I started kissing him, that’s when I knew for sure. I’ve got no control when it comes to him. I belong to him with his feverish kisses that make me forget my own fucking name.
We kissed so much last night—before, during, and after. I still try to pretend I don’t like it or need it, but Ky knows. Whether it’s in the desperate grasp of my fingers or the burning heat of my skin, I give myself away.
With my arousal building, I know it’s nearly time.
I need him again—just like an addict needs a hit—so I can breathe and feel alive.
I want to kiss his lips, and bite, then make my way down until I circle my tongue around a soft, pink nipple, feeling it rise under my touch.
I want to give him so much pleasure that no other man will ever compare.
But mostly, I want to rid myself of that void deep inside me.
Make the pain fade. And there’s only ever been one person who can do that, and it’s Ky.
Reaching out, I stroke the hair from his forehead, then let my fingers glide over the angles of his face.
Ky sighs at my touch. He’s beautiful and I want to keep him, now that I’ve fallen stupidly and dangerously in love.
One day I’ll have to own it—man up and say it out loud—because it will demand to be said, something this strong, this unyielding.
But not yet. I’ll keep it to myself a little longer, where it’s safe and can’t be taken away from me.
Tucked deep inside where no one can see, not even Ky.
I lean forward and connect our lips. Ky’s mouth is lax, and that feels odd, but it’s also soft and pure.
Licking delicately across his bottom lip elicits a sleepy moan.
I kiss again, sucking his bottom lip into my mouth.
His hand slides up my spine and settles firmly on the back of my neck.
I wrap my fingers around his shaft, and it seems to harden almost instantly under my touch.
“Bren,” Ky sighs before slipping his tongue into my mouth.
“Mornin’ Davies. You ready for round two?”
Ky stares up at me, eyes soft and heavy-lidded. “Always ready for you.”
Laying down on my back, I pull him on top.
Soon he’s inside me, holding me tightly and thrusting with long, slow strokes.
Our eyes remain locked on each other, and I don’t think I can survive how open and exposed I feel, because Ky sees all of me.
My mind soars free as my body explodes with pleasure.
I know I should tell him that I’ve fallen fucking head over heels in love. But not yet.