Afflicted

25. Juliet

The first signthat something weird is going on comes in the cafeteria. Someone bumps into me, making the coffee cup on my tray wobble, brown liquid dribbling over the edge. I turn towards them, muttering an apology out of habit, and I stop short when I see their face.

The man, Jeff I think his name is, looks terrified. His brown eyes are wide as he backs away from me.

“S-sorry,” he stutters, sweat visibly beading on his forehead.

“No problem, it was an accident.”

The others walk past me with their heads bent, avoiding looking at me, almost scurrying away from me. I shake my head, heading for a place near the window. When I sit down on the bench, the people nearby shuffle away from me.

What the fuck?

Gina sits down opposite me, and a few heads shoot up, eyes full of alarm. I meet her gaze, and she’s frowning.

“What is going on?” I ask quietly.

“I was hoping you’d tell me,” she replies, leaning across the table to take my hand.

“What do you mean?”

She clicks her tongue. “Come on now, I saw what that feeder was doing to you the other night.”

“He wasn’t doing anything to me.”

Gina squeezes my hand, leaning forward, her brow furrowing with concern. “Baby, I know you’re young and you want love, that’s normal. We’ve all seen how close you and this vamp have become.”

I yank my hand out of her grasp and cast a glance around the cafeteria. Eyes shoot down to plates, heads snapping away from me.

I look back at Gina, my jaw dropping. “Everyone’s weird with me because of Silas?”

“They all think you’re his favorite or his pet or something.” Her eyes flicker from side to side, and she leans closer. “Some people are saying he’s feeding off you.”

I cough out a laugh. “Oh my god, this is ridiculous. Everyone knows they’re not allowed to bite us.”

“They’re not allowed to have sex with us either.” She reaches across the table to try and take my hand. “I saw him take off your panties. He was lying right on top of you.”

I bury my hands in my lap, leaning back away from her. “You didn’t see that, that’s not what happened.” I can’t look at her as I lie. I cast my eyes down to the table, and I can feel her gaze burning into my face.

“Peque?a, what is going on?”

“Nothing.”

She sighs heavily, throwing her hands in the air. “Baby, I can’t help you if you won’t talk to me. You’d think you’d have had enough bullshit with that other asshole.”

“Silas is nothing like him,” I snap, and when I look up at her, she’s crossed her arms over her chest and is giving me that Mom look. That look. Like she knows. She knows exactly what’s going on. “Silas cares about me, OK? He’s my friend.”

“A friend who wants to screw you in a dorm full of sleeping people?” She tilts her head. “Baby, he’s not good for you. He’s your goddamn prison warden.”

“He’s not like that. And he wasn’t going to screw me.”

“How can you let a predator like that touch you? After everything you’ve gone through.”

“He is not a predator!”

“He threatened me.” Gina emphasizes the word, and a few heads turn in our direction. “That’s what you like, is it? A friend who chokes me out because I caught you two-”

“You didn’t catch us!” I spring to my feet. “Nothing happened! Alright? Nothing!”

Gina leans back, shaking her head. I look around at all the staring eyes. There’s looks of disbelief, fear… and disgust. They all think I’m some vamp whore. I can’t take them all just staring at me. I can’t take them all judging me like this.

I push out of the cafeteria, into the rain, mumbling something about needing fresh air to the vamp at the door. He doesn’t stop me, and now I really am wondering if I have Officer’s Whore privileges. For some stupid reason, the thought sends tears pricking at my eyes.

I dash them away as I head across the grass. It’s a misty morning, and the damp clings to my cheeks, coating my throat as I breathe in deeply to try and stay composed. I walk down to the garden, my mind racing. The humans see me as a traitor? All because I’m friends with a vamp?

Friends.

Silas and I aren’t just friends anymore. As much as I wanted to lie to Gina, as much as I’ve tried to convince myself it’s not true, we want each other. We’ve been toeing a line that’s loaded with 10,000 volts, waiting for the shock, like it’s going to catch us by surprise. But even if we feel it now, we’re both ignoring it. We’re in too deep.

I tried so hard to push him away, so terrified I’d cause him to get caught, and hurt. But that night, the night he caught me, the thoughts of him and what I wanted him to do to me were too much. The shock I felt when he was suddenly lying over me, the thrill I felt when he touched me, when he pulled my panties down…

Just thinking about it now makes my stomach clench with desire.

I claw my hands through my hair. This is wrong. I’m not supposed to feel like this. I should be afraid of him. I should be repulsed by him. I shouldn’t want to have anything to do with him. Gina said it herself- he’s a predator, a monster.

But he’s nothing like Matt. He’s nothing like Braun. He’s beautiful and dangerous and looks at me in a way no man has ever looked at me before.

I like him. I like him a lot.

I stop in the orchard, the trees around me bare of fruit and leaves. I tip my head up to the rain, taking a deep breath. A shiver runs down my back, a warm, familiar rush. That shock tingles at my fingertips.

“I know you’re there.”

Silas’s footsteps move to my side. I open my eyes and turn my head towards him. Rain is pearling on his face, dripping from his hair. He gazes down at me, softness and darkness all at the same time.

“You alright?” He asks.

“No.”

“What’s wrong?”

I bite my lip, trying to decide what to ask first.

“That night you dragged me off to the shower, after you caught me with Matt. Why did you do that?”

He sighs, his eyes dipping to the floor. “Come on, we should get you out of the rain.”

“Answer the question.”

His gaze flashes back up to me. “Why do you think?”

I swallow hard. “You were jealous.”

“Something like that.”

“You could smell him on me.”

“Yes.”

“And you couldn’t take it.” I hug my arms around myself. “The others, they all think I’m yours too. Like I’m your pet.”

He growls. “They have no idea. Fuck what they think.”

“Yeah, fuck them.” I tilt my head to give him a side glance. “Speaking of fucking…”

His gaze is pure lust and shadow as he looks back at me. “Speaking of fucking?”

“The other night, in the dorm… When you caught me…” The words hang in the air, sparks passing between us as we test that line.

His mouth shifts into a crooked grin. “I could smell you, getting yourself off.”

My cheeks burn at the thought, and so does my clit. Holy fuck, the heat between my thighs almost takes my breath away as he gazes at me. I lick my lips, because suddenly everything feels hot and tight. He watches the sweep of my tongue, and his eyes start to change color.

“There was a night, when someone stood over my bed, and smelled me after I got myself off. Was that-“

My question is cut off as he grabs my arm, pulling me into one of the wooden work sheds at the edge of the garden. He slams the door behind us, and has me against the hard edge of a bench. I catch myself on my hands, breathing hard as I look up at him.

His arms cage me in place on either side of the bench, and his body is so agonizingly close. He’s stunning and terrifying at the same time. He could snap me in two, split me in half, so easily.

Fuck, I hope he does.

“That was me, that night.” His eyes wander over my face, his jaw ticking as though he’s fighting some internal battle with himself. “And every night since. I’d stand over your bed, and smell you, and think of all the things I’d do to you if you were mine.”

I raise a hand to reach out to him, but he jerks his head away from my touch, his eyes staying on my face.

“I need you to understand something about me,” he says in a low voice. “I want you, so badly it fucking terrifies me. I’ve never wanted anyone as much as I want you.”

I open my mouth to speak, to protest, to tell him that I want him to, but he seizes my chin.

“I want to fucking own you.” His eyes drop to my lips as his thumb sweeps across them. “I want to own every fucking inch of you. I want to kill every man who’s ever touched you before me. I want to fuck every trace of them out of you. Because I want you to be mine.”

My lip trembles under his touch, and his jaw sets. Self-loathing twists his face, his eyes filling with a sort of quiet yet furious defeat. He’s expecting me to be disgusted by him. He’s expecting me to shove him away, to run and tell him to never come near me again.

“And what if I want to be yours?”

It’s like we both stop breathing for a second. I lift my hands to his face, stroking the backs of my fingers down his cheeks. His eyes flicker for a moment, and he exhales heavily.

“I want you, Silas.” I cradle his face in my hands. “I knew the moment I got out of that lake. It wasn’t just whatever you drugged that blanket up with. It was you. I’ve wanted you ever since. You’re all I think about.”

“I’m not a good man, Juliet.”

“Was Matt a good man?” I shake my head. “You expect me to see nothing but a monster when I look at you. But I don’t. I know that you’ll never hurt me. You could have plenty of times. And you never did. I know you’ll never hurt me. I trust that.”

“I would never hurt you, angel.” His arms move around my waist. “I swear it. I’d kill anyone who hurt you.”

“I feel safe with you.” I wrap my arms around his neck, leaning my body into his.

“I killed Matt.”

The air rushes out of my lungs. I’d suspected. I’d wondered. It had all been too odd, too convenient. Now I understand the way he reacted when he’d held me in my hospital bed, guilt eating him up as he thought he’d driven me to do what I did. Not understanding that he was what was saving me.

He keeps his eyes on mine, watching me carefully.

“I killed him because of what he did to you.” His hands on my back don’t waver, still holding me to him. “He had to die. The way he talked about you, what he’d sacrificed you for… I couldn’t let that go unpunished.”

“The way he talked about me?”

His jaw feathers as he closes his eyes, seeming to take a steadying breath. When his eyes open again, they’re blazing crimson.

“I’m not a good man, and I’ll keep not being a good man if it means I can protect you.” One of his hands runs up my spine, until it rests at the base of my skull, cradling my head as he leans over me. “Do you know how hard it is, watching you and not being allowed to touch you? Not being allowed to take what I want from you?”

“I wish you could.” I pull him closer to me. “I’d let you do whatever you wanted to me.”

His eyes flare. “Is that right?”

“I know you’d make me feel good.”

“I’d make you feel so fucking good, angel.” His lips graze mine.

I close my eyes, feeling a rush as his hand flexes on my back. I almost moan at the touch, and I feel his lips turn up in a smile.

“Silas,” I murmur. “If you don’t kiss me now, I’m going to go crazy.”

His hand moves under my sweater, over my heated skin. “I like the idea of you going crazy. I bet you’d be a lot of fun crazy.” His grip on the back of my head becomes firmer as he holds me in place. His body still has me pinned against the bench, and I gasp as his hand cups my breast. “I want you crazy. I want you fucking unraveled at the seams for me.”

“Most guys tell me they’ll be gentle,” I say, sucking in a breath as he pinches my nipple hard.

“I’m not going to be gentle with you, angel.” He chuckles darkly against my ear. “Because I can feel you’re desperate to be destroyed.”

My pussy is flooded with heat at his words, and I buckle a little in his grasp. “Silas, please.”

In an instant he lifts me up and places me on the bench. His hips push my thighs apart, and I wrap myself around him as his hands hold my head. His mouth descends on me, and fire rushes through me because he’s kissing me, he’s finally kissing me. His fangs prick my lower lip, but the pain just turns me on even more. His tongue strokes inside my mouth and all of me opens up for him. All of me wants him, any way he wants me.

I’m melting against him. No one’s ever kissed me like this before. The shock zaps through my veins, because the line we weren’t meant to cross, we’ve stormed past it. There’s no going back now. This isn’t allowed, this isn’t allowed, this isn’t allowed - the words reverberate through my head over and over, but any sense I might have had, any self-control he had, it’s been obliterated.

“What will they do to you?” I murmur as he releases my mouth.

He shakes his head. “I don’t care.”

“But-”

“If this is all we have, I don’t care. If this is all the time we have together, I don’t care.” He kisses my neck, his fangs raking hard against my skin, and the pain makes my toes curl in the best fucking way. I yank at the buttons on his shirt, our fingers frantically fighting to get his clothes off.

He throws off the shirt and tugs my sweater off over my head. He cups my breast, lowering his mouth to my nipple. My heels drag up his legs as I moan, locking my legs around his waist. I’m trying to stay upright, catching myself on my hands, then my elbows as his body leans over me. I can’t resist. I don’t want to. His fangs brush against my nipple as he sucks hard, his other hand moving down over my stomach into my pants.

His groan echoes against my skin as his fingers stroke over my panties. “So wet for me, angel,” he says, lifting his head. “This needy little cunt is so desperate to be fucked.”

I move to shuffle my pants off, and Silas hooks his fingers into my waistband, tearing them down my legs. I’m lying on a bench in a garden shed, totally naked, in front of a vampire who looks like he’s pondering which part of me to eat first. He runs his hands up my thighs, and I quiver under his touch.

“I want to see you too,” I gasp, pushing myself up on my elbows. “I want to see all of you.”

His belt buckle clinks as he flicks it open, and my breath catches a little as his dick springs free from his pants. He’s huge - I already knew that. But his dick is pierced. Two metal balls adorn the blunt head, and he grins at me as my eyes meet his again.

“Makes it better for both of us, trust me.”

I let out a breathless laugh, and he advances on me. He leans over me, his hands splayed over my breasts as his mouth moves over my stomach. His lips are soft, but every now then there’s a sharp scratch of his fangs, and the combination sets me totally on edge. Who am I fucking kidding, I’m already on edge. I moan and writhe under his hands, under the hot breath washing across my skin. I can’t tell if the thundering in my ears is my own blood roaring or the deafening rain on the roof.

“Are you going to bite me?”

He straightens up, running his hands down my body. “I haven’t bitten anyone in years.” His eyes meet mine. “I want to taste you, angel, but fuck if I do that now, I’ll make you come harder than you’ve ever come in your life, and I want to feel you first.”

His words make my heart race almost painfully against my rib cage. I exhale heavily around a moan as Silas presses himself to my entrance, but instead of pushing inside me, he teases my clit with the head of his cock. His piercing strikes me over and over again in just that way, and my thighs squeeze around his hips.

“Oh fuck, fuck, Silas, holy shit.” I’m panting, my back arching off the bench as he continues to fuck my clit. “Ah, oh my god.”

“That’s it, angel. Fuck, I want to hear you.”

My thighs begin to tremble, clenching either side of him, my orgasm building. “Don’t stop,” I moan. “Oh god, don’t stop.”

I look up at him, at his blazing red eyes, and cry out as my climax shatters through me. Silas barely gives me a second to catch my breath, running a hand up my back and pulling me upright. He looks down, his breathing hitched as he pushes his cock inside me. God, he’s so hard. I whimper and moan as he pushes, more and more. Oh fuck, I still haven’t taken all of him.

“You’re too big,” I gasp, and his grip on the back of my head tightens. His eyes meet mine, and he pulls out a little.

“You can take it, angel.” He pushes my thighs further apart, keeping his eyes on me as he slides back inside me. This time, he pushes all the way in, and holy fuck. He kisses me, swallowing down the cry that leaves my lips. “OK?” He asks, gently biting my lower lip.

“Yeah.” I’m more than OK. I’m so much more than OK right now, filled with him, his body so hot against mine.

“You should have told me to stop, angel.” He groans as he thrusts into me.

“No, never.” I press him closer with my thighs. “I need you.” I whimper as he thrusts again, and his brow furrows as he pants against my lips.

“Am I hurting you?”

I growl as I nip at his lips. “Fuck me til I’m sore. Please.”

That dark, threatening chuckle rumbles through his chest. “Such a dirty fuckdoll.” He withdraws from me, pulling me down off the bench and spinning me around. He bends me over, running his hand down my back as I press my hands flat, looking over my shoulder at him.

When he does sink back into me, we both moan. I reach back for him, and he twists my arm so it’s pressed against my back. Oh fuck, yes. I curl my other arm back so he can hold me down completely. With his other hand he grips my hair, winding it around his fist. I want to be at his mercy. I want him to fuck me and use my body and make me come.

I want to feel like I’m his.

He fucks me hard, hitting me so deep inside that it almost hurts. But when I breathe out, relaxing into the feeling and surrendering to him completely, it feels so fucking good. I close my eyes, opening up for him, letting him push into my body over and over again.

The line is miles away. There’s no going back now.

And I don’t ever want to.

“Fuck, so fucking tight,” he murmurs as he slams into me, grasping my arms and pulling my hair. “Fuck.”

My toes curl, lifting me up against him, making me even tighter, and I feel my next climax building.

“Ohhh, god, Silas, I’m going to… Oh god.” My legs are trembling, and I can barely keep myself upright.

“Let go for me, angel, let that pussy come all over my cock.” He hisses in a breath.

Even as wet as I am, there’s still friction, and the drag of his piercing right against my g-spot - how can sex feel this good?

Silas is gasping and moaning, I’ve never been with a man who’s given his pleasure a voice like this. It makes it all so much hotter, hearing just how much he’s enjoying this. How much he’s enjoying me. His grip on me doesn’t release, not even a bit, and it makes me come even harder. My second climax crashes through me, and coming with him inside me, feeling the pulse of my body around his cock, heightens every single sensation.

Silas releases my hand, pulling me up against him by my hair. His fangs brush against my neck, like he’s hesitating.

“Please,” I murmur. “Do it, please.”

With a groan, he strikes, just as he fills me again.

I knew the bite would feel good, he’d told me that. He’d said it would make me come. But I wasn’t prepared for his bite to send the most violent orgasm I’ve ever experienced coursing through me. It peaks over my last climax, lighting up my whole body, sending it crashing and shattering, falling apart for him. He drinks down my blood, his tongue lapping it up in long, hot sweeps over my skin.

His fangs pull out of my neck, and he grinds into me as I ride out the high, as I feel him tense against my back. I feel him come inside me, feel his heat fill me, spilling out of me. He groans out his release against my neck, turning my face towards his, kissing me so I taste the copper of my blood that’s glazing his tongue.

He pants against my mouth, muttering out curses and praise, telling me how beautiful I am, how fucking sexy I am, how I was made for him. I settle into the euphoria, that post-fuck haze that makes my heart thump and my blood sweeten. His fingers are still tangled in my hair, his other hand wrapped around my throat, his cock still seated deep inside me. I feel utterly possessed and strangely whole, in a way I’ve never experienced before.

“Fucking hell, angel.”

“Can we do that again?”

He laughs dangerously, pressing kisses down my throat. “My needy little fuckdoll.”

I moan, rolling my hips on him.

“You like the names, don’t you?” He growls against my skin.

“Yeah.” He’s still hard, and I rock my hips, bouncing myself on him. “I-I only like it from you. I don’t - oh fuck.” I whimper as he holds me still, wrapping his arms around my waist. “I don’t want to stop.”

“Me neither, but I need to.” He withdraws from me, turning me around gently in his arms as I quiver. Blood lines his lips, and his eyes are still that blazing crimson. He strokes his fingers over my pulse, over the spot where he bit me, and inhales heavily. “I nearly bit you when I came, and…”

Bad memories. I wrap my arms around his waist, drawing him close to me. I nuzzle into his broad, warm chest, dark with tattoos. “I told you, I trust you.”

He brushes his hands over my hair. “I know, angel.”

Thunder rumbles overhead, and suddenly tears are biting at my eyes. I sniffle and Silas’s whole body tenses, tipping my face up to his.

“What’s wrong?” He raises his eyebrows, his fingertips running over my cheeks. “Jules, what’s wrong?”

My lips tremble. “I want to stay with you. I want to be with you, and I can’t be.” I throw my arms around his neck, sobs bubbling up my throat. “I fucking hate this life. I hate this place. I hate that we can’t be together.”

He pulls back from me, taking my arms and removing them from around his neck. I panic for a moment, thinking he’s pushing me away. But then he raises one hand to his mouth, tenderly kissing my palm. He repeats the action with my other hand, his soft lips pressing against my skin.

I start to cry harder.

His eyes are fading back to their normal rusty color when they meet mine again. “If you think I’m going to regret this, I won’t. Even if that makes me selfish.”

I shake my head, hot tears cascading down my cheeks. “You’re not selfish. I don’t regret it. I just want… I want more than what we have. More than just this.”

“I know.” He pulls me close to him, wrapping his huge arms around me. It’s the safest I’ve ever felt in my life, skin to skin with a predator who could tear me to shreds.

“Maybe you could tell them I am your pet.” I laugh cynically, brushing my tears away with the heel of my hand. “We’re not really people are we? We’re just bloodbags. What would it matter if-“

He cuts me off, punishing my mouth with a bruising kiss. “Don’t say that,” he mutters, shaking his head. “Don’t fucking say that.”

I let him hold me, slumping against him, taking in all the heat of his body and letting him warm me up. He keeps kissing me, hard but slow, and with each stroke of his tongue he claims another part of me. I’m his, forever, whatever that means. But even as he draws me back into that warm haze, even as I wrap myself around him and swear to never let him go, I know. I know that trouble lies ahead. I can feel the storm clouds crackling on the horizon.

We may have crossed the line - but reality is going to keep tugging us back, back, back. Until the shock finally catches up with us.