Chapter 5 Senssssational #2
“Then at least go sit on the other couch,” I said.
“Why, am I bothering you, Conner?” he asked.
So we were playing that game again. I couldn’t believe a man old enough to run for public office thought it was that funny to pretend to forget other people’s names.
Curtis corrected him, but he did it again, then I corrected him, adding, “Whether or not your behavior’s bothering Curtis, it’s starting to bother me. ”
Naya tried to help, saying, “Ross, shouldn’t you be working on some PR thing for your film or something?”
Curtis’s eyes got wide, and he turned, excited, as if he’d just heard the revelation of the century. “Wait a minute…are you Jack Ross?”
Jack responded smugly, “Yeah, why? You got a problem with it?”
“A problem? Hell no! I love your work!” Curtis gushed.
Great. Just great.
I rolled my eyes as I observed the malevolent satisfaction that overtook Jack’s face.
Surely Curtis noticed, too, but he didn’t mind my nerves.
He continued, “My friends and I used to love your YouTube channel! But since you never showed your face in your videos, I didn’t realize it was you.
The last time I was here and they said something about you being a filmmaker, I didn’t put two and two together, probably because everyone calls you by your last name. When’s your movie coming out again?”
Curtis almost blushed when Naya informed him, “In two weeks!”
“I’m buying tickets now!” Curtis exclaimed. Then, almost guiltily, he looked over at me. “I don’t know if you’re planning to go, Jenna, but I could get one for you, too.”
“Whatever,” I responded. “I hate movies anyway.”
The silence that followed was as uncomfortable as could be, and when Curtis picked up on all the negativity, he stood and walked to the restroom. Once the door shut behind him, I grabbed a couch cushion and threw it at Jack’s head. He ducked and stared up at me, murmuring, “What the…?”
I told him to leave Curtis alone. He protested he hadn’t done anything.
I reminded him he’d been calling him by the wrong name on purpose.
He just chuckled, and Naya told us to lower our voices.
I told him he was scaring Curtis, intimidating him, making him feel uncomfortable, and to hurt my feelings, Jack responded, throwing the pillow back at me, “I don’t know, he seems to like me better than you. ”
“Does not!” I protested, hurling the pillow back.
“He said he was my fan!” Jack responded.
“He’s just being nice. Your YouTube videos, your movie, I’ll bet they’re all trash!”
He threw the pillow at me again as he shouted that his film was the shit, and I told him I was going to put it up on the internet where people could download it for free so nobody would bother going to see it at the theater.
We continued bickering back and forth until Curtis emerged, holding his phone, and announced, “It’s getting late, I hadn’t realized.
Sorry, Jenna, but I need to go. It’s been a long day, and I’m dying for a shower. ”
“Sure,” I said, “I’ll send you an email with all of our notes.”
I followed Curtis out, and when Jack tried to stand, I pressed a finger into his chest, hard enough to elicit an ouch. He tried to swat my hand, but I dodged him just as Curtis, who hadn’t noticed a thing, said, “Hey, it was nice hanging out with you guys,” and Naya responded, “Likewise!”
Jack rolled his eyes and got one last dig in: “See you round, Curly.”
I smacked him with the pillow again. I didn’t care if Curtis saw. Instead of tossing it back, Jack grabbed it and held it to his face, his shoulders moving up and down with laughter.
On his way out, Curtis murmured, “I’m dying to hear you guys’ full story, just so you know.”
“Buy me a burger and maybe I’ll tell you,” I replied.
“That’s all? Sounds worth it.” He gave me one of his comforting hugs. “We could make it tonight, if you want. I was going to ask you if you wanted to come bowling with the guys anyway. The two of us can hang out after.”
“I’d love that.”
He patted me on the cheek and said, “Cool. I’ll text you.”
I shut the door behind him and stomped back to the living room. Naya looked uncomfortable, Jack looked smug, and I tried to ignore them both, but when I made it down the hall to the bedroom, I couldn’t help but turn around and growl at him, “I hate you.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment,” he responded. Why was he so good at provoking me, and why was I so bad at giving it back to him?
“You’re a child,” I fired back. “Curtis will probably never want to come back here again.”
“Oh, no,” he said. “Poor Curtis. I’m sooo sad.”
I told him I’d never say anything if he came here with one of his girlfriends.
He told me he’d never disrespect me enough to do something like that.
I told him that there would be no issue, that I was mature enough to understand the entire world didn’t revolve around me, probably because I hadn’t been raised with a silver spoon in my mouth.
“Loser,” he replied.
“Dumbass!”
“Loser.”
“Dickhead!”
“Loser,” he repeated.
“Moron!”
Jack turned to Naya. “I think she loves me.”
Naya smiled and said, “I promised I wouldn’t get in the middle of this.”
I called him an idiot one more time, and he told me I was breaking his heart. As I slammed the door to the bedroom behind me, I heard him shout: “I love you, too, idiot!”
A few hours later, Naya was sitting opposite me on the bed with her legs crossed and rollers in her hair, which made her hard to take seriously. She was supposed to be going to dinner with Will that night. But in that moment, she was more concerned with digging into my friendship with Curtis.
“So…you two are going on a date then?”
“It’s not a date. We’re going bowling with some friends and then we’re grabbing a burger.”
“Riiiight.” I tried to ignore the implication as I looked through my suitcase for something to wear—I still hadn’t completely unpacked.
Her stare like a hawk’s, she asked, “You don’t like him, though?
Not just a little bit? Because he’s nice, he’s charming, he’s attractive.
I mean, you know how I feel about Will, but if I was single, I’d sure as hell bite. ”
“Yeah,” I admitted, “Curtis is cool, but… I don’t know. He’s just…”
“He’s not Ross, right?”
I didn’t respond, instead just plopping down beside her.
I hadn’t gone out in ages and I was stressing about what to wear.
The whole process was getting on my nerves so badly that I wanted to just give it up.
Naya sighed and continued, “It’s normal, Jenna.
You guys had a very intensive relationship.
I can imagine it’s hard to turn the page. ”
“It’s not really about turning the page, it’s more like we’re in totally different worlds and we can’t even beam a message to each other.”
“Does that bother you?” she asked, confused.
I didn’t know. Should it? I mean, he was supposed to be my ex-boyfriend.
I wasn’t supposed to have feelings for him, good, bad, or indifferent.
So why would any of this matter? Naya could tell I was getting uncomfortable, so she turned to my pile of clothing, fished out a skirt, and tried to change the subject.
“You should put this on! And your black sweater with it! And some tights, obviously, so you don’t freeze. ”
I wasn’t sure a skirt was the best thing for bowling, but she told me since I’d suck at it, I might as well look good.
I laughed and snatched the skirt away, shoving her.
She shoved me in turn, and we cracked up as we got into a pillow fight.
Then the door opened, and all of a sudden, Sue was there shouting at us to stop acting like a couple of six-year-olds.
I guess we’d been a little louder than we’d intended.
Naya mimicked her: “Stop acting like a couple of six-year-olds!”
“You wanna die?” Sue asked her.
“You wanna die?” Naya repeated.
Sue told us we sucked, and Naya responded, “Come on, you love us. Why don’t you grab a beer and come in here and hang out?”
“I’d rather die. Or what’s worse, I’d rather hang out with Mike, who’s actually in the living room right now,” she replied. “Thanks for the offer, though.”
Will peeked in behind her and asked, “What’s going on in here?”
As Sue stomped off, she grunted, “Nothing, they’re just reminding me of why I don’t want to have kids.”
Confused, Will stared at us, and before he could react, Naya jumped up, pulling him down onto the bed and planting a hard kiss on his cheek that left behind a big streak of one of the many lipsticks we’d tried on.
He wriggled away from her, but I helped hold him down while she tickled him, kissing him all over the face and neck, until he announced, “I’m starting to understand where Sue was coming from. ”
Mike walked in and exclaimed, “Have I died and gone to heaven? Don’t stop, girls, just move over and make a little room for me!”
Naya told him to get out and threw a pillow at his head.
I glanced at the clock. I only had about ten minutes left. I lay back next to Will, who was trying to wipe the lipstick off his cheeks as Naya chuckled and told him it looked good on him. “Maybe you should add makeup to your daily routine. More and more men are doing it.”
“Very funny,” he responded. She pinched his cheek, and he smiled and blew a kiss at her.
They were so cheesy, they made me want to vomit.
The way they looked at each other… I was probably jealous, but I didn’t want to admit that to myself.
She told him I’d been trying to pick out clothes for that evening and showed him which outfit I’d settled on, and he recommended a red sweater instead of a black one.
When I said, “Great, so I’ve got two stylists now,” Will told me, “Yeah, and we charge by the hour.”