Chapter Seven Ryder
Chapter Seven
Ryder
If I considered myself mad before, I was seething angry after having read Seraphina’s file. Now that I knew her life, even if only in bullet points, I could figure out why she’d taken such risks to work for Ezra Sokolov.
She was brave and clearly had a death wish. That terrified me, especially since she didn’t have the full weight of the US government behind her and was being hunted by them instead.
I was also mad at myself for letting her go.
For not holding her hostage. For not convincing her to come clean to me.
Most importantly, I was mad as a motherfucker because I couldn’t save the dead, and what if she already was?
What if there were crickets on Ezra’s end because he’d found her shortly after she’d texted me, so he didn’t need to dispatch a team to search for her?
“Fuck.” The word snapped from my mouth, drawing Reed’s eyes.
He was sitting in the armchair by the window in my hotel room, reading over the file. He’d remained eerily quiet while absorbing every last detail inside.
Seraphina, born and raised in California.
Seraphina, top of her class at Stanford, graduated with two degrees, one in mathematics and the other in accounting with a specialty in forensic accounting.
Seraphina, thirty-two as of last month in August, never married and no kids.
Seraphina, Seraphina, fucking Seraphina. Her name kept playing in my head like song lyrics you couldn’t forget. I wanted to hear her name. Hold on to it. Taste it. Live in it.
Seraphina, whose life got flipped upside down when—
“This is heavy.” Reed’s comment jarred me loose from nearly spinning out, and that’s what I was doing.
Losing my damn mind.
This wasn’t like me. I didn’t do this. I compartmentalized. Adjusted course. Always stayed in control.
I didn’t obsess. I didn’t overthink. I didn’t want to smear another man’s blood all over my hands the way I wanted to do with Ezra’s, who I had every intention of going after once I tracked down Seraphina.
“She’s resilient.” Reed blinked a few times, setting aside the folder. “Maybe that’s not even a strong-enough word.”
“ Crazy ? How about that?” Now I was mad at her. For risking her life like this. For not letting me risk mine.
At the knock on the door, I assumed it was Alex, so I went over and swung it open without checking first. You know, top of my game and thinking clearly. “You send Beth on her way?” I asked him, stepping aside so he could get in.
He didn’t budge, remaining in the hall, eyeing me. “You said it was urgent, so yeah, I did. But this better not be some bullshit to prevent me from making a mistake.”
“At least you admit spending time with her would be a mistake,” Reed said from behind me, and I was with him on that.
“Just tell me what’s going on.” Alex shouldered past me, not convinced I hadn’t set him up to stop him from a casual hookup with that demon of a woman I hated.
“We’ve been tasked with finding Anna,” I cut to it, shutting the door behind him. “She was an informant for the DEA. And her real name is Seraphina.”
“What?” Alex spun around, nearly colliding with me.
“Told you it was urgent.” I rolled my eyes, then pointed to the file.
“Lainey assigned us to the case, of all people,” Reed added, standing to offer Alex the file so he could play catch-up. “I’m sure she strong-armed the director on that.”
“You’re kidding me, right?” Alex looked back and forth between the two of us. “You’re telling me we’re going after the woman you can’t stop thinking about? That’s our new mission from DHS?”
“Who said I—”
“You didn’t have to say shit. We’re both well aware you’re obsessed.” Alex focused back on the file as Reed dropped into the armchair by the window. “Never seen you like this. And now your ex is asking you to find this woman.”
I ignored his comment because he wasn’t wrong: I was beyond obsessed. I was two levels above that. “Just read it. Let me know what you think.”
“Are we assuming someone blew her cover at the DEA?” Alex asked.
“Maybe.” Lev’s, too, more than likely. “But the very small handful of people who knew their real identities are denying culpability. No links to Ezra or evidence to prove they’re lying.”
“Well, I still don’t blame her for breaking protocol and not reaching out to her handler after we rescued her,” Alex said.
Unable to stop myself, I took the file from him, needing to look at her again. It wasn’t like I hadn’t already spent the last three days staring at the few photos of her as Anna on social media like some sick fuck.
The DEA had pulled two images from the CCTV footage outside a twenty-four-hour storage center only ten minutes away from the safe house we’d been at.
Seraphina had my shirt on over her red dress, and I’d never be able to rip the image of her wearing it from my mind.
“Since you didn’t let me finish reading, fill me in,” Alex grumbled, finally catching my eyes. “Go on.” He rolled his wrist, motioning for one of us to talk.
Reed waited for me to speak, probably curious whether I’d be able to hit control-override and return to normal operating mode. You know, be a Tier One guy again.
I couldn’t believe it, but all it took was a woman I’d spent a handful of minutes with last weekend to bring me to my knees when Al-Qaeda, ISIS, and the Taliban combined never could. Nor the US military-industrial complex, if I was being totally honest. They’d tried. Oh, how they’d tried.
“Well,” Reed said, picking up on the fact I couldn’t speak right now unless it was a string of curses, “Seraphina was undercover, working for Ezra as his accountant. Because it was too risky to check in often, she only did so once every two weeks. Her mission was to figure out who was heading the overall operation, as well as learn as much as she could about their trafficking routes and who they were working with overseas.”
“Guessing she never did identify the head of the snake?” Alex asked him.
“Not that we know of,” Reed answered. “She was supposed to make contact with her handler yesterday, and when she didn’t reach out, he started digging into what might have happened. Then Lev’s body also turned up.”
“My guess is they killed Lev the same night we were at the house, and they’d been planning to kill her next.
” But we stopped them. Thank fuck. “Her handler at the DEA found footage from Saturday night of Seraphina at the storage unit she kept.” I held up the photo taken of her that night, my stomach squeezing at the sight of her in my shirt all over again.
“So that’s where she went after going out the window and disappearing on us.” Alex folded his arms, staring at the image.
She texted me that night. I never told them. Not sure why I kept it to myself, but I did. Like it was my own dirty secret, buried deep, right along with all the things I’d imagined doing with the woman. God, I needed help. Probably therapy.
“She left the site with a backpack.” I showed Alex the other image. She’d changed before taking off from the storage unit, wearing a ball cap, sneakers, jeans, and a black tee. No longer in my shirt. Did she throw it away there? That’s irrelevant, dammit.
“I assume her handler gave her a backup alias and passport if her cover was ever exposed.” Alex looked at me for an answer that time. “And she didn’t use it, or we wouldn’t be the ones tasked with finding her now.”
I closed the file and set it down. “Right.”
“She must have had her own contingency plan she kept from the DEA. Another alias to use to escape the city—and more than likely, the country—if she was ever in trouble. There must be someone out there she trusts who’s helping her,” Reed surmised.
“My question is ... if someone’s really dirty at the DEA, why’d they sit on information about her and Lev? ”
“Maybe it’s not someone that’s DEA,” I pointed out. “The joint task force with the FBI was only recently created. Intel may have been shared with the Feds that they already had people on the inside.”
Alex lifted his chin, eyes on the folder. “I’m guessing that information wasn’t in the file. A possibly corrupt FBI agent on their task force working for Ezra.”
“Right.” Who the hell were we supposed to trust at this point? Made sense Seraphina wasn’t so sure, either. “Could also be that Lev was only aware there was a second insider, and he fed that information to Ezra in hopes of saving himself.”
“Yeah, can’t exactly trust a criminal to do the moral or right thing,” Alex remarked.
“Well, regardless of who may have sold her out, we need to find her ASAP. I want a location within forty-eight hours.” My gravelly tone was probably as rough as the look on my face.
“You always were an overachiever.” Alex cocked a brow, smirking. He strode over and gave me the firm nod of reassurance I needed. “We’ve got this, boss. Don’t worry.”
I didn’t bother to correct him on the boss stuff. Not this time. I may not have deserved that term with how unraveled I’d become at the idea that Seraphina was alone, with the likes of Ezra and his men searching for her, but oh-fucking-well.
“After we find her, are we really turning her over to your ex?” Reed asked me. Something I hadn’t wanted to think about yet.
“I don’t know.” Defy orders, or defy whatever logic was currently guiding both my head and heart? “But one thing’s for sure: I’m not letting her out of my sight this time. Even if I have to personally escort her to the Pentagon myself.”
“See. Told you. Obsessed.” Alex’s smile stretched. “And it’s a good fucking look on you, boss.”