25. Heath
CHAPTER 25
heath
W hen a man screwed up as epically as I had, the damage control was massive.
I’d handled Daniel, but that had been a crime of opportunity, so to speak. I needed to talk to Alexa, but before I did that, I needed to sort things out with my daughter, who had refused to give me more than single-word answers since last Saturday—when I lost my shit with Sable.
“Yes.”
“No.”
“Okay.”
“Thank you.”
And her favorite. “ Whatever!”
I watched Juno from the couch as she sat across from me in the armchair, her legs curled up under her. She was scrolling on her phone, completely engrossed as if this wasn’t about to be the hardest conversation I’d had with her since I’d told her that her mother and I were getting divorced.
“Juno,” I started.
She glanced up, raising an eyebrow. “Yes?”
I took a deep breath, running a hand through my hair. “I need to apologize.”
Her phone went dark as she set it down on the arm of the chair, giving me her full attention. “Whatever!”
“Come on, Junebug, give your old man a chance, will you?”
She crossed her arms and rolled her eyes. “Whatever.”
I assumed this whatever was her way of saying, “ Fine, talk. ”
“I want to start by saying that the way I treated Sable was wrong. I should’ve talked to her privately.” It was humbling to find that I, who prided myself in being fair, had fucked up so badly with the woman I’d realized too late I was in love with and my daughter, who was more important to me than my own life.
She straightened and waited.
“I should’ve also gotten all the details before I went off on her,” I admitted. “I screwed up.”
She didn’t say anything; she just tilted her head as if she knew I had more to say.
“I will not criticize your mother in front of you because that puts you in a bad place and?—”
“Saying someone is wrong when they’re wrong is the sign of a healthy relationship,” she cut me off. “I already know what Mama did was wrong. You pretending it wasn’t makes me trust you less. ”
Ah, fuck! This kid.
“Okay,” I agreed. “Your mother was wrong and has been wrong in going after Sable and her tavern because we were dating.”
“That’s on you, too, Daddy.” Juno wasn’t ready to give an inch. “You had your head in the sand.”
“I know. Sable told me that Alexa was?—”
“Not about that , about how Mama wanted to get back with you. I told you. Mama told you. Aunt Natasha told you. Grandpa and Grandma told you. Instead of talking to her and telling her never gonna happen , you just went about being friends . I mean, you two got along so well, even I, who witnessed all the yelling and screaming while you were married, sometimes forgot why you got divorced.”
“How old are you?” I marveled at her maturity.
Juno’s lips twisted into a small smile. “I know why you did that. I know you wanted me to have parents who got along—and that’s something I want, but I also don’t want you both to…I don’t know, do shit like this where you’re…crushing me in between.”
My heart clenched at her words.
For all my efforts, I’d ended up bringing Juno in between her mother and me. And I’d done the same to Sable.
“How can I make this right with you?”
She shrugged sadly. “I don’t know.” Now, she sounded like a child. “I’m just so tired of being angry with you and Mama.”
I rose and took a few steps to reach her. I crouched in front of her, taking her hands in mine. “How about we let the anger go? Please forgive me so we can move forward.”
She nodded. “Okay.”
And then she threw herself into my arms, and I hugged her tightly.
“How do you feel about ice cream?” I asked after a long moment.
She sniffled as she laughed. “Yeah, Daddy. That would be good.”
We went into the kitchen, and I gave her two scoops of vanilla ice cream and took one for myself. Sometimes, you just needed comfort dessert.
“I’m going to talk to your mother today.”
She nodded. “I’d like to talk to Mama, too. So, I’d like to be there…for part of it at least.”
I wanted to refuse her request, but I knew this was important for her. Both Alexa and I had failed her, and she deserved to say her piece. If she needed me with her when she spoke to her mother, I’d be there.
“Okay. I promise, Juno, I’m going to try and fix what I broke.”
“With Sable?”
“I don’t think she’s going to forgive me,” I said, my throat tightening as I admitted it out loud. “And honestly, I don’t blame her. But I still want to help her. Her business is struggling because of all this drama. I have a plan to help her. Even if it doesn’t fix anything between us, I owe her that much.”
Juno was quiet for a moment. Her brow furrowed like she was working through her thoughts. Finally, she spoke. “I’m proud of you, Dad,” she said simply.
I was caught off guard.
“You made a mistake, and you’re owning it. And you’re trying to fix it. That’s what matters. Well, that’s what you’ve always told me.”
The knot in my chest loosened at her words, and I gave her a small, grateful smile. “Thanks, Junebug.”
Her eyes filled with tears. “I’m sorry for being mean to you.”
“It’s okay. I deserved it.”
“I love you, Daddy.”
“I love you, too, kiddo.” I hugged her again and took the win. I had my daughter’s respect and trust back, and I intended to never lose it again.
I texted Alexa, making sure she was at home and telling her we were coming over to talk. I wanted her to be prepared, so I added, “ Juno wants to talk about what happened .”
Her reply was: You don’t need to tell me when my daughter wants to talk to me .
Okay, so Alexa wasn’t ready to help put this behind us. Well, that sucked. I let my daughter know that Alexa might not see what she’d done as wrong and that Juno needed to be prepared for that.
As we walked into Alexa's house, I could feel the tension radiating from my kid. Juno used her key, but I did ring the doorbell to let Alexa know we were here.
My ex was in the living room, wine glass in hand, looking like she didn’t have a care in the world. But I knew her , and I knew she was scared. Alexa was a lot of things—and so many of them, lately, I’d discovered were not great—but she loved Juno and was a decent mother when she wasn’t crazy with jealousy.
Alexa had positioned herself on her couch, every detail calculated like she was posing for a feature in Architectural Digest. It was all a facade. Beneath the polished surface, she hated the idea that her daughter had issues with her—and even more, that she might be the reason for them.
“You both look like someone killed your puppy.” Her tone was flippant, but I caught the tremble in it.
What happened to the woman I’d married? The one who had been nice. I knew a little now about how she’d been as a teenager, but people outgrew that—however, it felt like once we were in Aspen, she’d regressed, gone from mean girl to mean ex-wife.
“We need to talk about?—"
“Oh, here we go,” she cut me off, rolling her eyes.
“Mama,” Juno snapped, surprising both of us. She rarely raised her voice, especially not with her parents. “ Stop . Just stop.”
Alexa blinked, looking genuinely taken aback. “Excuse me?”
“You’ve been awful.” Juno’s voice shook with anger and sadness. “To Sable, to Dad, to me . And for what? Because you’re jealous? Because you can’t stand the idea that he’s moved on, and you haven’t?”
“Mind your tone, young lady.” Alexa tried the disappointed mother tone. I could tell her that wasn’t going to work. Juno was done putting up with her bullshit, and if Alexa were paying attention, she’d have known. I couldn’t help either of them with this, so I let it play itself out.
“Mama, you called another person trash in front of me and said I’d turn into trash, too,” Juno accused.
Alexa’s eyes shuttered, and I saw guilt and shame sparkle in them. She knew what she’d done was wrong, but she didn’t know how to admit it and backtrack.
“Well, I am right about that.” Alexa dug in.
Juno shook her head. “What you are, Mama, is mean. Really, really mean and cruel.”
“How dare you talk this way to me?” Alexa protested, but her voice lacked confidence.
“Because…,” there was a wealth of sadness in Juno’s voice, “you’re my mother, and you are supposed to be better than this.”
Juno’s words hit harder than anything I could’ve said, and for once, Alexa didn’t have a comeback.
“You’re hurting people, including Daddy and me,” Juno continued. “And it’s not okay.”
Alexa looked down at the coffee table in front of her and set her wine glass down, all bravado gone.
“Juno.” I gently rested a hand on her shoulder. “Why don’t you go wait up in your room? I need to talk to your mom alone.”
She hesitated, glancing between us, but eventually nodded and left without another word.
For a long moment, Alexa and I sat in silence .
“How can she say such things to me?” Alexa’s mouth wobbled.
“You know how.” I felt bad for her because I knew how hard it was to have your daughter be disappointed in you, reprimand you, and turn the tables on who’s the adult and who’s the child.
She looked up at me, her eyes brilliant with unshed tears. “Do you have any idea how hard this has been for me, Heath? Watching you move on, watching you be happy with someone else?”
“I can imagine,” I empathized. “But that doesn’t excuse what you’ve done. You’ve hurt me, you’ve hurt Sable, and now you’re hurting Juno. Why?”
Her face crumpled, and she looked away.
“I don’t know,” she admitted. “I just...I didn’t want to feel like I was losing everything. Like I was nothing.”
“You’re not nothing,” I consoled. “You’re Juno’s mother, and you’re you .”
“It doesn’t feel like enough,” she snapped.
“Regardless, you’re a grown-up, and you have to deal. So, the gossip, the sabotage, the drama, all of it needs to stop. For Juno’s sake, if nothing else.”
“You’re behaving like you’re not to blame for any of this,” she shouted, angry, helpless, and frustrated. I understood those emotions well.
“I am, without a doubt, at least partly to blame,” I confessed, shocking her. “I should’ve been clearer with you about how we’re never going to get back together. I should’ve steered clear of you socially and kept the lines clear. Instead, I let them blur. We can’t eat dinner once a week as a family—not now, not when you’re hoping that we’ll get back together, and I have no idea why you’d want that.”
“Because I love you, Heath, and I know you love me.”
I shook my head. “I don’t love you, Alexa. Not anymore.”
“No,” she whimpered. “Don’t say that. I’m your wife. I…thought sure we’d get divorced since…you were so adamant, but then you agreed to move here and?—”
“I had no choice, Alexa,” I explained. “You were taking my daughter away, insisting on moving. It would’ve torn her apart to have to fly back and forth between us. What did you expect me to do?”
“I expected you to mean it when you said till death do us part.”
I sighed. “I wanted to very badly. But we grew apart, Alexa. These things happen. Do you remember the last five years? They were a shitshow. We fought all the time. We had different priorities. We were raising Juno in a home where there was conflict all the fucking time.”
“It was your fault.” She didn’t entirely believe it, but she felt it. Since I was the one who asked for the divorce, in her mind, the responsibility—whether fair or not—fell more on me than on her.
“Regardless, we’re here, and whose fault our divorce was doesn’t matter.” I took a deep breath. “Our marriage is over . All we can be is co-parents.”
“Because of her ?” she sneered.
“No, Alexa,” I asserted softly but clearly, “because of who I am and who you are. Our marriage ended years ago, long before I met Sable. Our breakup has nothing to do with her. Dragging your father into this, asking him to threaten Sable and me, that’s not cool.”
She just stared at me, disdain dripping from her.
“I mean it, Alexa,” I added sharply. “You need to stay away from Sable. No more rumors, no more interference. If you keep this up, you’re going to lose Juno.”
She flinched. Grief replaced anger in an instant.
“I never meant to hurt Juno,” she whispered.
“I know, but you need to prove that to her just as I need to show her that I’m not an asshole who disrespects a woman in public like I did.” I stood up. “Let this go. Move on. Because I have.”
She didn’t respond, and I didn’t wait for her to.
I called out for Juno, who tentatively came downstairs. I smiled at her, and she nodded. “Should I say bye to her?” she asked softly.
“Give her time,” I reassured her. “You’re back here next week, and by then, things should be fine…well, at least fine-ish.”
At least I fucking hoped that Alexa would get her head out of her ass and not fuck up things with our daughter more than she already had. But if she didn’t, her regrets would be hers to carry. I couldn’t do any more than I already had.