Chapter Eighteen #3
Garret could see that he was getting through to the man.
“I would wager to say that de Nantes wasn’t even your father.
It could have been any number of nasty French bastards but your mother was an opportunist for telling Henry that his brother, Geoffrey of Nantes, was your father.
We all know the story and we all laugh at it.
Still… you do not look like a member of the royal family to me. You look like a beggar’s son.”
Enraged, Jago charged towards Garret but Rickard held him back. Garret snapped at his brother.
“Why do you hold him?” he demanded. “If he wants to fight me, let him come. You have no right to hold him back, Rickard. You will not interfere.”
Rickard looked at his brother with a pained expression. “Be still, Garret,” he hissed, turning to Colchester. “My lord, go inside. Go inside and remain there. Let me deal with my brother.”
“Rickard,” Garret said, his voice low and steady. “Do not make this between you and me.”
Rickard could hear the hazard in his tone. He turned to look at Garret. “Do you not understand, Garret?” he asked. “The moment you came to challenge Colchester, it became between you and me. As Colchester’s champion, you gave me no other choice.”
Garret knew his brother was only doing his duty but he was pained to realize that Rickard was choosing his duty over blood. “Is that what you will do? Fight me because he pays you to?”
“I am sworn to him.”
“You have been my brother longer than you have been sworn to him.”
Rickard’s frustration boiled over. Garret was trying to provoke a fight. More than that, he was trying to force Rickard to forget his oath. He was trying to make a fool out of him. Leaving Colchester, Rickard marched on his brother, getting in the man’s face.
“Can you not let me have a position that is as good as something you have?” he hissed.
“You are the great one, Garret, the great knight of Richard, so great that the king made you the Captain of the Royal Guard at Westminster. And what am I? I do not have half your skill. Everyone knows that. I am your older brother but I have spent my life listening to praise for you. You are the one father is proud of; he has never been proud of me. You are the one everyone admires and looks up to. So I took a position with a duke, an unscrupulous duke at that, in the hopes of having some measure of achievement that was as good as yours. And now you try to take that away from me?”
Garret felt as if he’d been struck. “Rickard…,” he began, stopped, and then started again.
“You are my older brother. When father dies, you shall inherit everything. I will inherit nothing. You have a beautiful wife, a child on the way… did you ever stop to think it was I who was always trying to live up to you?”
Some of Rickard’s anger subsided at Garret’s brutally honest words. “I will never achieve half of your greatness,” he said, pain in his voice. “What you are asking me to do now… you are asking me to relinquish my honor by refusing to protect a man I swore an oath to.”
“Nay, I am not.”
“Aye, you are. That is exactly what you are doing. Do you really want me to step aside and let you kill Colchester? Because that makes me look like a coward. Would you truly do that to me?”
Garret couldn’t believe what he was hearing, but in the same breath, he understood what Rickard was saying perfectly. God, it hurt his heart to hear that.
“I would never try to make you look cowardly, Rickard,” he breathed. “I am sorry if you feel that way. But I must punish Colchester for what he did to Lyssa. If I walk away, I will be the coward. I will not be worthy of being called a man.”
“Then we have a problem.”
“It would seem so.”
“Will you really fight me? You know I am not the warrior that you are.”
It was so painful to hear Rickard admit that. In fact, the whole situation was turning hugely painful. Rickard had to fight for Colchester or be dishonored, and Garret had to fight his brother because it was a matter of honor for him, as well. Someone had to back down. But no one would.
They were at a stalemate.
“Aye, I will really fight you,” Garret finally said. “But before you lift a sword against me, remember that you were not so loyal to Colchester when you came to Westminster yesterday morning to tell us that he had allied himself with the prince.”
Rickard knew that was true. “That was in a private forum, with only a few men to know,” he said.
Then, his gaze moved to the mass of men that Garret had brought with him.
“But now… there is an audience to see what I will do. Will I stand against you and do my duty? Or will I fold and allow you to shame me?”
Garret understood. “Then this is about public perception.”
Rickard shrugged. “A man’s reputation is something that can be seen by all, especially in something such as this.”
“Then I put you in this position.”
“Not deliberately, no. But we find ourselves in this position nonetheless.”
Garret understood about the pride of a man, and especially the pride of his brother now that Rickard had confessed his feelings of inadequacy against his mighty brother. No, he wouldn’t take that away from Rickard. But there were things he needed to know.
“Then I will tell you what is going to happen,” he said. “I am going to fight you and I am going to disable you. Then, I am going to kill Colchester. If you believe that will dishonor you, then I am terribly sorry. I truly am. My heart is full of sorrow for this moment. But I must do as I must.”
Rickard seemed to sink a little, his shoulders slumping as he became aware that Garret had no intention of backing down.
He knew he couldn’t beat him in a fight but, much like Garret, he had little choice.
It was damnable, foolish honor and damnable, foolish pride for them both. There was no other choice.
It had come down to this.
“Then I will meet you in the bailey,” he said, feeling more fear than he cared to admit. “I must gather my weapon.”
“Then go,” Garret said, his mood depressed as the reality of the situation settled. “But there is one thing.”
“What?”
“Gavin is here. He wants to know what has become of his sister.”
Rickard’s gaze traveled to the knights in the darkness, catching sight of Gavin standing with the group. “She was part of Colchester’s carnage but I believe she will survive,” he said. “You will tell him that.”
“I will.”
“And, Garret?”
“What is it?”
“Be… kind. I should like to see my child when he is born.”
Garret almost lost his composure then but he fought it, holding as steady as he could. “Where is your wife?”
“In our chamber. I told her to remain there.”
“That is good. She should not see this.”
Rickard couldn’t bring himself to respond.
He turned for the manse, ignoring Jago as the man pounced on him and tried to tell him how to coldly murder his brother.
He shut down to any and all advice from a man who wanted to see his brother dead.
In fact, perhaps this battle between them was for the better, because of it was Jago fighting against Garret, then Garret would be facing an opponent who truly wanted to kill him.
Rickard did not. All he wanted to do was survive.
He wanted his brother to survive, too.