Date Monday 6 March Time 7.10pm
My thoughts and reflections:
Weird coming in to work today. Everything is, essentially, the same but very slightly different.
Lydia was on security but instead of her suit jacket being on the back of the seat, she was wearing it buttoned up, and instead of a scowl, she was wearing a smile – well, at least until she saw it was just me.
Yaz’s desk was pristine and devoid of food and there was a fruit selection in the kitchen.
Even Drunk Stephen had sharpened up his skin fades, which shouldn’t be possible considering they’re always immaculate.
His trainers were a dazzling white that would rival the brightest Turkish veneers.
‘Wow,’ I said, ‘someone’s made an effort. ’
‘I always look good, Alice,’ he said. ‘Nothing out of the ordinary here.’
Except, of course, for the notice which had been stuck to the meeting room door: Clare Atkins, LL Group.
Guy’s assistant, Iris, was wearing lipstick and had put a bunch of battered fake flowers on the desk. ‘Nice flowers,’ I said.
‘They’re dusty,’ she said. ‘I took them from the bathroom at home but every little helps, doesn’t it?’ I noticed her hands were shaking as she tidied papers on her desk.
‘Iris,’ I said, ‘I don’t think you’ve got anything to worry about. You’re a lynchpin round here.’
‘It’s hard not to worry, Alice,’ she said, ‘when you’ve got cats to feed. I don’t want to let them down. They need me.’
‘I’m sure you won’t let them down, Iris.’
I didn’t mention that she had lipstick on her teeth because she seemed quite wobbly as it was.
Guy strode past without pausing at my desk and went straight to his office. ‘Christ, Iris,’ I heard him drawl, ‘did you do your make-up in the dark? You’re going to scare the consultants.’
Cara called a quick meeting in one of the side rooms and told us we all had this and to carry on as we normally would. She said we’d been clearly told that that the LL Group were an independent third party and that we needed to accept this at face value and feel confident.
Nervous Jane said, ‘But they’re firing us.’
‘No,’ said Cara patiently. ‘Carsons are.’ Then as Nervous Jane’s face crumpled, Cara hastily added, ‘Some of us! Only some of us.’
‘Is this Clare Atkins in the main meeting room already?’ whispered Yaz.
Cara didn’t know. No one seemed to know. ‘Just get on as normal,’ Cara repeated, her voice only slightly strained.
So we got on as ‘normal’, and there was a sort of hive of activity and industry, but the door stayed shut, and I felt like I’d been on the Red Bull.
Just before lunch, Guy came out of his office, knocked on the meeting door room, waited and then opened it. There was a sudden hush as everyone watched. ‘For fuck’s sake,’ he said. ‘She isn’t even in there,’ and then he told Iris to keep a fucking eye whilst he took an early lunch.
‘Someone’s stressed,’ said Yaz under her breath.
A moment later, my phone buzzed with a message from Guy, saying this whole merger process was making him hungry, and asking if I had plans this lunchtime or if he could eat me out. I didn’t know if it was a typo, but said yes.
FYI: Clare Atkins from LL Group didn’t turn up all day.
FYI 2: It wasn’t a typo.
I ask the Universe:
To let me get my meeting with Clare Atkins over and done with quickly.