Date Thursday 18 May Time 7.20pm
My thoughts and reflections:
So, I’ve had a pretty significant day today; the kind of day that prompts you to write and record (even if you’re not actually manifesting) and acknowledge that maybe it’s not the worst idea to surrender to the Universe…
I met with Kelly (Harry Piles’ replacement) last week and shared some of my ideas with her.
She was super-excited about my ‘Break Into and Break Out Of’ non-fiction pitch for a fast, responsive, trend-driven series giving teens insider / expert information and tips about how to break into things like publishing, TV, football, exam success, dating, etc.
, and how to break out of things like toxic relationships, negative thoughts.
I showed her trending clips on TikTok and the market research I’d done and the potential for us to create social media content and package existing content.
So excited that she called in Drunk Stephen and started talking about design straight away and if he thought this was the type of project he could add value to.
And obviously he did, because I’d already bored him senseless with it and he’d not only helped me (in fact, he kind of inspired the idea in the first place with the Break Into Publishing talk he did at the local secondary school) but got pretty enthusiastic himself.
So she set me and Stephen the task of putting everything together, in a wish-list sort of way, and to think big.
Which we did. We consumed a lot of margaritas along the way but we came up with a fucking solid plan even if I do say so myself.
Anyway, today, Drunk Stephen and I were invited to a meeting with Kelly and Guy to catch up. Drunk Stephen thought it was hilarious. ‘What if you forget yourself and accidentally fellate Guy?’ he said.
‘Ha,’ I said. ‘So funny. I think you should be more scared that he’s found out you know about us and is going to send me – and you – to Scotland.’
It was, of course, as awkward as you’d expect it to be.
Guy was polite and formal with me (because he’s still a bit annoyed that I wasn’t more grateful for his offer to keep shagging him and also have lunch with his adult child), and I was so careful to give the impression that Guy was only a scary boss to me that I practically called him guvnor and curtsied.
However, then Kelly said, ‘Guy and I have some news we’d like to share with you. Cara is leaving.’
‘What?’ I said, genuinely taken aback.
‘It won’t be until the summer,’ continued Kelly, ‘but she’s very kindly let us know now so we can think about succession planning. In fact Cara has been instrumental in the succession planning.’
‘But, why?’ She’d been so worried about losing her job during the merger. Plus, I’d become quite good friends with Cara and she hadn’t mentioned leaving to me.
‘It’s the right time for Cara. Now her mother is doing so well in the care home, Cara’s planning to rent out her house, and take the gap year she never had.’
‘ Oh.’ It made sense now, all the questions about Astrid and her gap year. ‘Good on Cara.’
‘Fucking ridiculous,’ said Guy Carmichael.
‘So she’s coming back after a year?’ said Drunk Stephen.
‘Well no,’ said Kelly.
‘And we offered to keep her job open,’ said Guy.
‘Cara’s moving in a different direction,’ said Kelly. ‘I think she’ll do superbly. The point is, we find ourselves with a vacancy. A senior role.’
‘Okay… ’ said Drunk Stephen, looking over at me uncertainly.
‘We’ve decided not to seek a replacement for Cara,’ said Kelly.
‘Instead, Cara, Guy and I have spent quite some discussing and planning, and we’re all agreed that the best way forward is to grow what we have here.
Including the design department, which we need to bolster if we’re going to create the kind of rapid publishing ideas you’re coming up with, which Guy and I genuinely believe could be transformative for the overall P&L. ’
‘That’s where you two come in,’ said Guy. ‘Providing you don’t piss off on gap years.’
‘We’d like to create two new flexible roles,’ said Kelly.
‘Editorial Director and Art Director, and we’d like you both to take these.
You’ll each have responsibility for a small, discrete team, probably only of one or two to start with, but that can grow.
You will work together to ensure continuity and effectiveness and to lead a brand-new imprint.
You can come up with the name and logo – I’m sure you’ll create something amazing. ’
‘You want us to be… directors?’ said Drunk Stephen. ‘With our own list?’
‘We do,’ said Kelly. ‘Guy is keen to expand and I’m going to have a lot on so I’d quite like to hand this fast, responsive, TikTok-style imprint over to you. You’ve both raised your heads above the parapet and we think you can do this.’
‘Um. What about Yaz?’ I asked.
‘Don’t worry,’ said Kelly, ‘she’s being promoted too. But she’ll stay in the main non-fiction team – you guys will have your own stream.’
‘There’d be more money of course,’ said Guy.
‘It’s a once-in-a-career opportunity,’ said Kelly.
‘You’re drooling, Alice,’ said Guy.
‘Sorry,’ I said. ‘You’re going to promote us?’
‘Yes,’ said Guy. ‘If you’re not having a stroke.’
‘Can I just check,’ said Drunk Stephen, ‘is the job based here, in London?’
‘Where else would it fucking be?’ said Guy. ‘Of course it’s here.’
I am letting go of:
Feeling bad for Cara. She looks like a weight has been lifted.
She’s told me that so long as her flat stays rented out, it not only pays for the mortgage, but the nursing home and the letting agency fee.
Plus Carsons are paying her notice period and letting her leave next week.
She said this is the first time she’s had the freedom to do this because she knows her mum is being cared for properly, and is healthy enough to safely leave.
‘If I don’t do it now, Alice,’ she said, ‘I never will. As Mum gets older it will only be harder to leave her.’ She said she’s been inspired by hearing about my sister, that manifesting is about the here and now, and she wouldn’t be surprised if gap years for women in their forties take off.
And when she comes back, she’s going to become an agent.
She’s decided she wants to grow and invest in individuals, and manifest success for people.
I told her I think she’ll be brilliant. Look at all she’s done for me.