Chapter 15
CHASE
Dylan is my first unofficial coaching client—unofficial because I haven’t quite finished my course yet.
There are still three modules, plus the certification exam.
I offered to coach him for free for the next three months while I finish everything and get settled, in exchange for an honest testimonial to help me attract future clients.
Dylan refused, though, so we settled on a reduced rate for my services.
It’s weird, this feeling of excitement over my work. I wait anxiously by my computer each afternoon until it dings, letting me know Dylan has completed his run. Even though he doesn’t provide comments immediately, I always open it right away to check how he did.
So far, it’s been a great relationship. He’s a hard worker, laid-back, and funny. Even when his workouts don’t go according to plan, he has a good attitude. I’m happy to be working with him. Happy and work aren’t usually words that I use in the same sentence, unless there’s a not connecting them.
It won’t always be this way. There’ll be some clients I don’t get along with, and weeks where entering workouts into a system, calculating paces, and doing all the administrative work feels more burdensome than anything else.
But I can honestly say I’ve never felt this way about a job before.
That has to mean something. At least, I hope it does.
Between coaching Dylan, getting through the coursework to earn my certification, setting up a website, and putting in twelve hours a week working at Tannenbaum Tales, I’m starting to feel like I have a purpose in life again.
It doesn’t hurt that Nix has restored a lot of that purpose to my life. He’s a great guy and an even better boyfriend. He’s patient, kind, and sexy—all the things I’ve ever wanted in a partner. He’s been working hard to make sure that I see Sleighbell Springs for what it is.
We even went to a drag show at Sleigh Queen.
There’s another set of words I never thought I’d utter.
I’ve, of course, heard of drag shows, but this was my first time going to one.
It was both more and less exciting than I thought it would be, and because it’s Sleighbell Springs, of course, there was a little bit of Christmas cheer to it. In June.
Maybe it’s because the other parts of my life have made me so happy, or maybe this ridiculous town is growing on me, but it wasn’t so bad—either the Christmas aspect or the drag.
If Russ gets out here to visit, we’ll have to take him.
He’d love it. Plus, I think he’d enjoy getting to see how much I’ve grown in my time here.
Trying new things. Not being such a stick-in-the-mud.
As much as I hate to admit it, his throwing me out of his living room was the best thing that’s happened to me in a long time.
Maybe ever. Without it, I never would’ve come to Sleighbell Springs, would never have reconnected with Nix, and probably would have taken a lot longer to figure out anything about myself, like I have since I’ve been here.
I check my watch and close my computer for the rest of the day.
Nix’s plumbing got fixed, so we’ve been spending the night back at his place.
As much as I love the studio, it’s small and sterile.
Nix’s home works much better for us. Now, I only spend time here during the day, so I have a place to study.
Time to head downstairs for my shift. It’s a good thing, too, because I miss Nix.
It’s only been a few short hours since he left for the day, but I already feel the loss.
If someone had said something like that to me before, after only a week of dating, I would’ve called them needy.
Well, I guess I’m needy. The good thing is that Nix likes me that way.
“Come on, Nick. Time to earn your kibble.” The big cat looks up from his spot on the couch at the word kibble.
Yeah, I know the secret words to get his attention.
I might not have any of those Churu treats he loves so much, but he knows that if he follows me downstairs, I’ll check that his bowl is full.
Nick races in front of me on the stairs, practically taking me out in the process. “Is that necessary?”
He glances back at me with a disdainful expression on his face. Guess that’s my answer.
My phone starts vibrating as I hit the back room. A string of text messages. The only person who messages like that, one incomplete thought after another, is my brother.
I owe him so many conversations and explanations.
I’m not avoiding him, per se. It’s more than I don’t know what I’m supposed to say to him.
He’d be happy for us. Probably. But there’s also this small part of me that knows how protective he is of Nix.
What if he thinks I’m not good enough? Certainly, I haven’t done much to prove myself to him over the last few years.
Russ Haywood
Hey! Where are you?
I’ve got big news!
NIX
This year is extra special. I get to take Chase to his very first Pride. Well, maybe not his first, but the first where he gets to see himself and his sexuality represented. It’s a big honor for me, and I plan to make sure he gets to soak up every minute of it.
Yesterday, I made a quick shopping trip to pick up a bunch of fun items for both of us. Face paint, some t-shirts, and rainbow sunglasses. It’s a bit over-the-top, but I hope that Chase can relax and enjoy the event.
When my phone rings, I know it’s Russ before I even take it out of my pocket.
We’ve missed the last few mornings of phone calls.
Entirely my fault. The guilt makes my stomach churn.
Not only because I’m skipping out on talking to my best friend, but because I’m doing it to spend a few more minutes naked in bed with his brother.
“Hey, Russ. Sorry for the busy week.” I barely get the words out before he interrupts me.
“I have a surprise for you.” Even through the phone, Russ’s excitement is clear.
“A good surprise?” With my best friend, I have to ask. It’s a lesson I’ve learned over and over again.
“I think you’re going to like it. You’ve been asking for it for years.”
I rack my brain trying to think what he might be talking about.
He does go to antique sales occasionally.
Maybe he found one of the books on my list of wants.
Most of them are pretty hard to find, especially since I want them to be in decent shape.
That part makes it especially difficult for the early editions.
Most of them have been, I’d say, well-loved by their previous owners.
“It’s me.”
“What?”
“Me!” he repeats. Am I the one not making sense? It’s possible, given the whirlwind of the last week. “I’m coming to Sleighbell Springs.”
“What? When?” I’ve told Russ so much about this place that it’s hard to believe he hasn’t been here. When we chat, he knows everyone who lives in town. It’s almost like he’s here with me.
Almost.
“I get in on Sunday afternoon. Any chance you can pick me up at the airport? Or let Chase borrow your car if you need to be at the store.”
Sunday? That’s two days away. Chase and I haven’t really defined anything in our relationship at this point, other than the fact that we’re dating.
I haven’t pushed him either. This is still temporary for him.
I love it here. Love being part of this town.
Love my bookstore. Sleighbell Springs in my life.
Chase’s is out there somewhere else. He might not know where he’s going next, but he’s sure there is a next thing. As much as I want him here, where we can make a real go of things, I also want him to be happy. Could a place like Sleighbell Springs ever offer enough for him?
“Did I lose you?”
“Sorry, I was just thinking. Yeah, we can pick you up. I mean, one of us will pick you up.”
“Okay, just let me know. I’ll be on the lookout for your car. I can stay with you, right?”
Technically? Yes. Now that the water’s back on at my house, there’s no reason not to let him use the guest room. There are still areas of my place that look like a construction zone, but they’re mostly out of sight.
I’ve gotten used to having Chase next to me at night. Sneaking around behind Russ’s back will be nearly impossible. And there’s no good reason why I would sleep in the apartment when my bedroom is in perfect working order.
Ugh. I’ve been begging him to come here for years. Why did he pick the one time I need him to stay away?
“Nix?!”
“Sorry.”
“Do you have customers? I can call back later.”
“No, it’s fine. I’m just a little tired. Of course, you can stay with me. I’ll fix up the guest room for you.”
“Great. I’ll see you soon.”
“I can’t wait.” Two days. Two days until Chase’s brother is here. Two days until my best friend in the whole world arrives.
My mind is still reeling from the conversation when Chase comes barreling through the front door, holding his cell phone high over his head. “Did you know about this? That Russ is coming here? On Sunday?” His voice gets higher with every sentence.
“He just called a few minutes ago.” I point toward the cell phone on the counter.
Chase’s face goes from bright red to practically white.
“Hey, let’s sit down.” I practically run around the counter to guide him to a chair. If he passes out, there’s no way I’ll be able to get him back up. “Put your head between your knees.” I’m not sure what that’s supposed to do, but I’ve seen it on TV. “Take a few slow breaths for me.”
Chase does as instructed while I rub his back. “It’s a shock to me, too. But it’s going to be okay.”
“What will we say to him?” Chase’s voice is muffled in this position, but I can work out what he’s asking.
“We can tell him whatever you’re comfortable with. Or nothing at all. He doesn’t have to know anything.”
Chase sits up straight. A little of his color has returned, which must be a good sign. “I’m not embarrassed.”
“I know.” I do, as much as I would love to confess the whole thing to Russ over the phone before he arrives, this is about Chase.
Telling him about whatever we’re doing is different for me.
Russ already knows I’m gay. He’s known for as long as I have.
He doesn’t know that his brother is bisexual.
That’s not mine to share. “You know Russ loves you, right?”
“I know. And I know that he’ll accept me no matter what. So will our parents. I mean, Russ did all the hard work. Coming out as trans and then gay. It still feels hard, though.”
“I know, sweetheart. Don’t worry. We’ll get through this together, okay?
I’ll follow your lead on what we do and don’t say to him.
Trust me, the two of us can find plenty of things to talk about that don’t include you.
” That part is very true. We can spend hours on the phone talking about nothing and everything at the same time.
“Are you sure? I don’t want you to lie to your best friend.”
“He’ll understand.” At least I hope he does. “Feel better?”
“A little.” The color slowly returns to Chase’s face, enough so that I’m not afraid he’s going to pass out on me. “Why don’t you go for a run? That always makes you feel better.”
“I’m supposed to be working.”
“Yeah, well, your boss thinks you could use the time off. The store is dead today, so there’s not much to do.” We both don’t need to be here ruminating over the weekend.
“Okay, if you’re sure.”
“I am. Go put those shorts on that I like so much and get out there.” That comment does the trick. His cheeks turn a rosy shade of pink before he stands, slowly, and heads back up to the apartment.
“Nick, what are we going to do?”
Nick purrs and rubs himself against my leg. It does nothing for my situation, but it does earn him a little treat. As soon as he has what he wants, he prances off, likely heading for one of his comfy beds.
“So, no good ideas?” Me either.