Chapter 19 #3
Kennedi turned the heat down and faced her fully. “Of course. What’s up?”
Monroe was quiet for a moment, then, “Are you gonna tell Uncle Ro what happened today?”
There it was. The question Kennedi had been waiting for all evening.
She moved around the island and sat on the stool next to Monroe, turning so they were face to face. “Do you want me to tell him?”
“I don’t know.” Monroe’s voice was small. “He’s gonna be so mad. Like, really mad. And he’s already dealing with so much.”
“Monroe, look at me.” Kennedi waited until the girl’s eyes met hers. “Your uncle loves you more than anything in this world. You are not a burden to him. Ever. You understand?”
Monroe nodded, but her eyes were glassy.
“What happened today wasn’t your fault,” Kennedi continued. “Your mom showing up at your school, making a scene—that’s on her. Not you.”
“I wish she would leave me alone. I miss Daddy and Granny too.”
Kennedi pulled her into her arms. “I know, baby. You got a lot going on. A lot of big girl emotions. We’re going to get through this together.”
“So that means you’re sticking around?” Monroe asked, hope glittering in her eyes.
“I hope so. Your big-head cousin is coming soon, so yeah, I think I’ll stick around.”
Monroe was quiet again, processing. Then, softer, “Do you think she meant it? About getting clean?”
Kennedi considered the question carefully. This was the hard part—navigating hope and reality with a kid who’d been let down too many times already.
“I think...” Kennedi chose her words carefully. “I think your mom probably believes she means it when she says it. Addiction is an illness. So wanting to get clean and actually doing the work to get clean are two different things.”
“So probably not.”
“I don’t know, baby girl. I hope so. For your sake, I hope she gets it together one day.” Kennedi paused. “But you can’t wait around for that to happen. You’ve got to accept who she is right now. If not, you’ll set yourself up for disappointment.”
Monroe nodded, tears spilling over now. “I wish she was normal, you know? Like, why can’t she be a regular mom?”
Kennedi hugged her tighter, and Monroe collapsed against her, shoulders shaking. “I know. I’m so sorry, Roe. I’m so sorry.”
They stayed like that for a while, Monroe crying into Kennedi’s shoulder while Kennedi rubbed her back and let her get it all out. When Monroe finally pulled away, her eyes were red, but she looked lighter somehow.
Truthfully, Kennedi didn’t want to tell Rolani, but she was sure he already knew. He’d threatened the school last time, and he’d put the fear of God in them. Someone had probably called him the second Monshay stepped foot on campus.
Little LA started moving, a flutter that grew into a distinct kick. Monroe’s eyes widened.
“He’s moving!”
“Yeah, he’s been active all day.” Kennedi took Monroe’s hand and placed it on her belly. “Feel that?”
Monroe’s whole face lit up as another kick landed right under her palm. “Oh my God, that’s so cool! Does it hurt?”
“Not really. It feels weird. Like he’s doing somersaults in there.”
They sat there for a moment, Monroe’s hand still on Kennedi’s belly, waiting for the next kick.
“Roe, can I ask you something?” Kennedi’s voice went softer.
“Yeah?”
“Are you happy about the baby?” Kennedi watched her carefully.
“I mean, I know you got a lot going on with your mom and your dad being gone, and now Uncle Ro’s got a whole new situation happening.
I... I don’t want you to feel some type of way about it.
Like you’re being pushed to the side or replaced or anything. ”
Monroe’s eyes met hers, surprised. “What? No. Ken, I’m so happy about the baby.”
“You sure? Because it’s okay if you’re not. Or if you have mixed feelings. That’s normal.”
“I’m sure.” Monroe’s smile was genuine. “I’ve been the only kid for forever. It’ll be nice to have someone else around. Plus, Uncle Ro deserves to be happy. He’s been taking care of everybody else his whole life. Now he gets to have his own family.”
Kennedi felt her throat tighten. “You’re his family too, you know that, right?”
“I know. But it’s different.” Monroe shrugged. “This is his baby. His girl. Like, his own thing that nobody can mess up for him. He needs that.”
“You’re really wise for fourteen.”
“I’ve had to grow up fast.” Monroe pulled her hand back. “But for real, I love him already. I’m going to be the best cousin ever.”
“I know you’re not going to play about him.”
“Not at all.” Monroe grinned, then looked at her straight. “I like you for Uncle Ro. He needs someone to make him smile too.”
“He deserves it, huh?”
“Yeah. He’s been through a lot.” Monroe stood. “I’m going to text him and tell him about today. Before someone else does.”
Kennedi’s eyebrows raised. “You sure?”
“Yeah. I’d rather he hear it from me than from the school or somebody on the street.” Monroe grabbed her backpack. “Plus, I don’t want him thinking I’m hiding stuff from him.”
“That’s really mature of you, Roe.”
Monroe shrugged. “I learned from the best.” She paused. “I’m gonna eat upstairs and finish my science project. Is that cool?”
“Of course. I’ll bring you a plate when the food’s ready.”
“Thanks, Ken.” Monroe paused at the bottom of the stairs. “And seriously, thank you. For today. For everything.”
“Anytime, baby girl.”
Monroe disappeared upstairs, and Kennedi heard her bedroom door close softly. She turned back to the stove, stirring the spaghetti sauce and trying to process everything that had happened today.
Her phone rang. Spirit’s name flashed across the screen.
Kennedi answered. “Hey.”
“Hey.” Spirit’s voice was tight, controlled. “Y’all good?”
“We’re fine. Monroe’s upstairs doing homework.” Kennedi lowered the heat on the stove and moved to the living room. “You good? You left kinda quick.”
Spirit was quiet for a beat. “I needed to get out of there before I did something stupid.”
“Like what?”
“Like go find Monshay and finish what I should’ve finished years ago.” Spirit’s laugh was bitter. “Seeing her today... It brought everything back, Ken. All the shit I thought I was over.”
Kennedi grabbed her water and settled onto the couch. “You wanna talk about it?”
“Not really. But I probably should.” Spirit exhaled hard. “You got time?”
“Yeah. Monroe’s good, food’s cooking. I got time.”
Another beat of silence. Kennedi could hear Spirit moving around.
“Robin and I grew up together,” Spirit started, voice quieter now. “Like, literally grew up together. With Giovanni and Rolani being friends, it made sense. We were best friends before we even understood what that meant. Me, him, and Monshay.”
Kennedi’s stomach dropped. She already knew where this was going.
“Monshay came later, of course. She moved here during our seventh-grade year, and we did everything together. But somewhere along the way, it changed for me. I started seeing Robin differently. He got taller. He got a mustache. Shit, a fifteen-year-old girl starts noticing.” Spirit paused.
“I was gonna tell him at prom. I had this whole plan—I was gonna take him to our spot and tell him how I felt. Spill it. I even wrote it all down.”
“What happened?”
“Monshay happened.” Spirit’s voice went hard.
“I let her read it. I told her how I felt about Robin. Mind you, no one was checking for his nerdy ass. Anyway, she was my best friend, and I trusted her with it. Told her I was in love with Robin, that I was gonna tell him and give him my virginity. Repeating this all feels so childish now...”
“It’s okay, sis. Get it out.” Kennedi kept her voice steady. “I assume she—”
“She told Robin she was secretly in love with him. She basically stole my damn everything. She slept with him.” Spirit’s words came out sharp, cutting. “She saw what I wanted and took it to prove she could.”
Kennedi closed her eyes. “Spirit...”
“Robin didn’t know. About how I felt, I mean. At least I don’t think he did.” Spirit’s voice cracked. “I never got the chance to tell him because two weeks before prom, Monshay announced she was pregnant. And Robin, being who he is, stepped up. Did the right thing. Committed to her and the baby.”
“Did you ever tell him? After?”
“Yes.” Spirit’s voice went quieter. “Years later. I came home from college, and he wouldn’t let me exist here without telling him why our friendship ended the way it did.
I told him the truth about Monshay, and I could tell he felt the same about me, but.
.. I don’t know. That visit only complicated shit more. ”
“Spirit, why didn’t you tell him sooner?”
“What was I supposed to say? ‘Hey, I know you’re about to be a father, but I’m in love with you’? That would’ve been selfish as hell. So I kept my mouth shut. Watched them playhouse. Watched Monshay destroy him piece by piece.”
Kennedi heard the pain underneath the anger, the years of holding this in. “That’s why you left.”
“I couldn’t stay here and watch that bullshit. I couldn’t watch him love someone who didn’t deserve him. I couldn’t watch Monshay play in his face over and over. Because even at the end of the day, Robin was my best friend, and he needed me to be neutral, not make shit harder for him.”
“And now you’re back.”
“And now I’m back.” Spirit laughed, but it held no humor. “And the first day I’m back, Monshay shows up. Like the universe is testing me or some shit. I wanted to kill that bitch all over again.”
Kennedi’s mind was racing, trying to piece it all together. “So, you still have feelings for him.”
It wasn’t a question.
Spirit didn’t answer right away. When she finally spoke, her voice was barely above a whisper.
“I don’t know. I thought I was over it. Thought I’d moved on.
But seeing Monshay today... It all came rushing back.
And I hate it. I hate that after all this time, all this distance, I still feel something. ”
“I feel like you aren’t telling me something.”
“Is this the journalist shit everyone is talking about?”