Chapter 27 JACOB
Chapter twenty-seven
JACOB
The night the three of us had together was foremost in my mind over the next couple of days.
It had been ridiculously busy, and I had to put two weeks worth of appointments into a few days so I could go to the dude ranch with Joe.
I finally had a chance to talk about it with Dusty—the horse—getting it out there often made things seem clearer.
“I think I love them both,” I said while I rubbed his face. “They are so different from each other, and the three of us get along so well.” I cut one of the apples I had with me and offered him half.
He nuzzled me for more. “How did this happen? What do we do, Dusty? Is all of us dating each other viable?” I sighed and gave him the other half of his apple.
“You and I could run away together and forget all about men. What do you think about that? If you could give me a solution to this problem, I’d appreciate it.
” I knew that Dusty would tell me what to do if he could talk, but the best I got was comfort.
While I groomed him thoroughly, I told him about each man and explained why I liked them.
As I finished up, I gave him his second apple, then kissed him on the nose.
I felt better saying a lot of these things out loud, even though he didn’t give me any solutions.
“How are you doing, Gentry?” Martin Wilson’s voice boomed from the other end of the barn. “You’re leaving town in a few days?”
“Yeah. I really appreciate that you are letting me go with Joe.” Nodding, he gave me a look I couldn’t quite interpret.
“Joe is a good man, and I will feel better knowing he has someone who cares about him protecting him.” He winked at me.
“Hey, did you see the eagle family? The three of them are doing really well. They have two eggs, and they are all sharing the brooding duties. It’s nice that it’s worked out for the three of them. ”
“Nature is amazing, how it can figure things out. I’ll take care of Joe, I promise.” I liked Martin, but it was weird how obsessed he was with the eagles.
He walked over and put his hand on my shoulder. “I know you will. Trusting you with his safety is easy for me because I trust you. Treat him like you do when you are collecting for me.”
I rubbed my forehead. His point was valid, but sometimes what he said made things more complicated.
I wasn’t sure what he knew about our situation.
Likely, he was aware of my reunion with Dusty and had probably heard that I was more than just friends with Joe.
Yet Martin was still encouraging me and trusting that I wouldn’t fuck this up, even if he did just compare Joe—my boyfriend? —to semen collecting.
“That’s really something to think about, and I appreciate your trust, Martin.”
If he trusted me, then that was a good thing. There were more things I wanted to say, but I couldn’t find a way to put the words together. I gave him a smile, and he pulled me in for a hug.
Throughout the week, I sent Dusty and Joe text messages. I missed them both, my mind always on one or the other. I had asked Joe about dinner a few times, and he would reply late at night or come up with an excuse. It felt like he was avoiding time with me.
We needed to talk, but it would have to happen on the way to the dude ranch.
At least we were staying in a hotel the night before, and the horses would stay with some friends of the Wilsons until morning.
We hadn’t had any time to talk about the night all of us were together, and maybe there was a problem that we needed to discuss.
It was finally the day we were leaving for the dude ranch, and after Dusty was loaded into the trailer, I triple-checked that I had everything I needed. I sent a text to Martin letting him know I was leaving. As I got in the truck, he walked over to me.
“You have a good time out there. I know that you are leaving the horses at the Penbrook farm overnight. They will have a package for you to bring back.”
“I’ll make sure to get it. Let me know if you need anything. All the animals in my charge should be fine. Earl promised to take care of them, and nothing should come up while I’m gone. One of the younger ranch hands will also keep an eye on everyone.”
“Perfect. Enjoy yourselves. You should get Joe out here to take some pictures of that eagle family. Those three are amazing to watch working together like that.”
That was a good idea. People loved pictures of eagles I bet they would sell on his website.
“I’ll do that.” He shook his head and walked away like I was missing something. I headed out to pick up Joe and Amber for our trip.
Joe and I finally got to the hotel around 6:00 p.m., and we were both tired from the long drive.
Even though we had been together for a little more than two hours in the car, nothing serious was discussed.
It wasn’t tense or awkward, but it felt off.
I hated that the natural rhythm we had was missing.
In the room, there were two double beds. Once we had our dinner, I got the nerve to talk about something other than the weather and his customers.
“Are you mad about the night the three of us were together?” After the words were out, I was no longer hungry, because I was terrified of his answer.
With his hamburger halfway to his mouth, he turned and looked at me, those blue eyes got glossy like he was about to cry, then he turned away. Looking down at his food for a long time, I started to feel sick. This was a problem because I hurt him, and I would never want that.
“No.” Then he said nothing else. He hadn’t finished eating, but stood up and put his leftovers in the bag the food had arrived in. “I’m going to go shower, then get some sleep.”
“Joe. We need to talk.” There was so much pain in his eyes, my stomach cramped, and I was afraid I would get sick on the floor. What was wrong?
“There isn’t anything to talk about. Being with you and Dusty was perfect. Having a couple of guys to hook up with regularly is incredible. Someday I hope to find someone who looks at me like you and Dusty look at each other.”
As he walked toward the bathroom, he pulled me up against him and kissed the side of my head. “It’s going to be a long week. I want to get to bed soon.”
With that, he walked away and quietly closed the door.
It was sweet what he said about Dusty and me, but I think he was missing that I look at him the same way.
My heart hurt especially when he made the comment about someone he was hooking up with regularly.
There was more between us, I knew it, but now he was acting as if we had only been hooking up.
JACOB
Have you talked to Joe lately?
It took less than a minute before he responded.
DUSTY
Yes. A little. Only a few times.
No flirty texts, no memes, no nudes.
It's a little weird.
JACOB
Something is wrong.
DUSTY
What do you mean? Is he hurt?
JACOB
No. He is physically okay, but there is something else.
He is pulling away from me.
And I think you too.
DUSTY
Oh. But.
It does feel like he is pulling away.
Jacob, what's going on? He means so much to me.
JACOB
Yeah. I have feelings too.
We are at the dude ranch tomorrow.
I’ll text again as soon as I can.
I promise to figure it out.
DUSTY
Okay. ILY
JACOB
ILY. Miss you. <3
Joe walked out of the bathroom, his hair damp, and he didn’t wear a shirt. I wanted to hold him, love on him, show him what he means to me. He went to the other bed, pulling the comforter down.
“Sleep in this bed with me? I’ll keep you warm.”
He continued to get the other bed ready for sleep. “I’m tired.” Then he climbed into bed and turned away from me.
I went to the bathroom and washed up. When I returned to the room, I turned off the light, but could still see Joe. Watching him for the longest time, my heart beat hard and then flip-flopped when I thought about how much I wanted him—needed him. How can I fix this?
Getting into my bed, I rolled so I looked at his back. I wanted to reach out. This sucked. Emotionally, I ached because losing him was the worst thing that could ever happen. At 2:00 a.m., I woke up to Joe standing between the beds looking at me. I lifted the covers and made room for him.
There was a huge sense of relief when he climbed into bed with me.
Tears slipped down my cheeks as I wrapped my arm around his waist and pulled him tight against my chest, not planning to let him go.
His hand slid up and linked with mine. Now I could sleep because this was how it was supposed to be.
The alarm woke us around 9:00 a.m. We didn’t have to be at the ranch until 11:00 a.m., and Joe would start by taking pictures of the guests as they arrived.
I hoped that things would feel better today.
This wasn’t the time or place to tell him how I felt, and I still had no idea how that would fit with my feelings for Dusty.
We had the week to work and interact with each other, maybe we will find the words over that time.
The drive to the Apple Creek Dude Ranch was pleasant, but we only discussed what was happening over the next week.
This ranch catered to the rich, and you could see that as soon as you pulled in.
All the ranch hands were dressed in matching clothes and promptly waved me toward the stables.
Joe got out of the truck and went to the front desk.
I unloaded Dusty and Amber and got them settled in a stall together.
Tonight we would sleep in one of the guest rooms, and then be on the trail at 8:00 a.m. tomorrow.
After Joe met with the owner about the pictures they needed, we were handed a bag filled with BBQ to take to our room.
As I set out our dinner, I missed Joe even though we had been together all day.
He hadn’t talked to me, other than things absolutely necessary.
“Are you excited about tomorrow?” He looked up at me.