Chapter Six #2
‘It’s okay, I’m quite proud of how I managed it, to tell you the truth.’ Elspeth frowned and continued, ‘But as much as I wanted to put Fraser in his place, there was Sabine to consider. I know you wanted their wedding to go ahead but I was convinced it would be a disaster if it did.’
‘You were right,’ Mack said with a heavy sigh. ‘Fraser has some serious growing up to do before he’s ready to settle down with anyone.’
‘There was another reason I agreed to step into my twin’s shoes.
..’ Her gaze came back to his. ‘Because of my allergy, I’ve spent most of my life with my mother hovering anxiously over me in case I ingest a peanut.
I only moved out of home a month ago and I’m twenty-eight years old.
If I checked my phone right now I swear there will be fifty missed calls or texts from her.
I have to turn my phone off most of the time otherwise it drives me crazy.
The last time I tried to have a weekend away, she turned up.
I was so embarrassed having her fussing over me.
I decided switching places with Elodie would be a chance to live a little.
To experience things I’ve only ever dreamt about before. ’
‘What sort of things?’
Her gaze drifted to his mouth. ‘The first and only time I was kissed when I was eighteen, I ended up in hospital with anaphylactic shock.’
It took a moment for Mack to realise the import of her confession. ‘You mean you haven’t been kissed until now?’
Elspeth gave a self-conscious grimace. ‘I know, pathetic, right?’
He took her by the upper arms again. ‘It’s not pathetic.
It’s... I’m just gobsmacked that I’m the first person to.
..’ He shook his head as another thought occurred to him.
She was so inexperienced. He was the first person to kiss her in a decade.
He was shocked and yet strangely touched.
Honoured that she had allowed him to be the one to be the first. ‘Does that mean you’re—’
‘A virgin? Yes. That’s even more pathetic.’
Mack released her to score a hand through his hair.
She was a virgin who had only been kissed once before.
How could he think of having a fling with her now?
He was used to sleeping with women who were at ease with casual relationships.
Sleeping with a sweet, shy virgin was not in his game plan.
‘No, it’s not pathetic at all. But it changes everything between us. ’
Elspeth looked at him in alarm. ‘What do you mean?’
He waved a hand to encompass their intimate surroundings. ‘We’ll stay the night here because it’ll soon be too dark to go back to the castle but we won’t be sleeping together.’
‘I see...’ Her expression became masklike but he could sense the disappointment in her. The same disappointment he was experiencing. A bitter disappointment that was hard to swallow. ‘Can I ask why?’
‘For God’s sake, Elspeth. You’re a virgin and I’m a freaking playboy, that’s why.’
She held his gaze with straight-shouldered pride. ‘I hardly see how that’s a problem. If anything, surely it would be an advantage? You know what to do and can help me.’
Mack rubbed a hand down his face, the sound of his palm raking across his stubble loud in the silence. ‘It’s not going to happen. I’m not the right person for you.’
‘I’m not asking for a commitment, Mack. I just want to experience sex with someone I desire. It can be just the once. I just want to lose my virginity to someone who will treat me with respect. I know you will do that.’
Mack let out a swear word in Gaelic. ‘I don’t want to talk about it any more.’ He stepped back to the table where he had left the box of food. ‘We’re going to have a drink and a light supper and go to bed. Alone.’
Her gaze drifted to the queen-sized bed through the open door of the bedroom off the living area. ‘But there’s only one bed.’
‘I’ll make do on the sofa.’ His back began to ache at the thought.
And not just his back but other parts of his anatomy that would have preferred sharing that bed with Elspeth.
But how could he do such a thing? She was so innocent, so inexperienced and he had no right to be thinking of taking her in his arms. She was off limits.
He had to be strong, in control of his desires, to be honourable and steadfast. He could do that, of course he could. He would have to.
‘It won’t be very comfortable for you. I’m not as tall—maybe I should sleep there instead.’
Mack shook his head. ‘No. You have the bed. I insist.’
‘But—’
‘No arguments.’ He injected his tone with a note of intractability, more for his own benefit than hers.
He had to be strong. He had to ignore the chemistry that filled the crofter’s hut with unbearable tension.
He had to ignore the throbbing need in his body.
He had to be out of his mind to even contemplate sleeping with her now he knew about her inexperience.
‘Fine. We’ll do it your way.’ Elspeth swung away and stalked off to the bathroom, clicking the door shut behind her.
Mack let out a ragged sigh and stared at the bottle of champagne in his hand. He had never felt less like celebrating.