Chapter 29
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Callum
Lena disappears from the clearing and into the woods, running in the opposite direction of campus.
It hits me; this was Boden? He planned this with Connor.
“Boden, what the fuck!?” What has gotten into him?
This isn’t the Boden I know. Sweet, strong, responsible Boden would never subject another person to this kind of embarrassment.
He’s under a lot of pressure with his Challenge approaching and Lena’s return to our world, but this? Who is he to treat her like this?
This goes against everything he wants to be, all the plans we made for a better, kinder realm. Guilt shines in his eyes. But right now, I don’t give a fuck if he regrets his actions. This was too far. I wrench my arm from his grip and chase after Vladlena.
Once I’m a few yards deep into the woods, I start shouting for her. It’s dark out here. No one should be alone in this forest. It’s easy to get lost, even for earth fae.
“Lena? Where are you?!” I shout into the ether. “Are you alright?” I hear her sniffling and stomping through the underbrush to my left.
“Lena, oh my Suns, are you okay?” She’s half dressed, covered in dirt and scratches from the brush. There’s a particularly nasty gash on her knee. She must have fallen.
I reach for her, and she jerks away from me. “No! Just leave me alone!” She clutches her torn dress and begins shouting at me in…is it Russian?
“Lena, I’m sorry I don’t understand.” I softly reach for her again. “Let me help you,” I beg.
“Help me?” she scoffs incredulously. “Did you and your friends enjoy the show, Callum?” She says my name with such loathing, I flinch.
“I didn’t know they were going to do that. I wouldn’t have allowed it.”
“Well, you didn’t stop it either.” She glares at me with wet eyes.
“You’re right, I’m sorry,” I say as tenderly and earnestly as I can manage.
“Why is everyone so fucking awful?” she yells.
“Look, I’m sorry, I am. I feel bad for my family’s part in the death of yours.
I do. But I had nothing to do with that.
I’ve never even met most of them. All of this because of my assumed parentage?
” She gasps through tears. “And you’re not the only people who have lost someone.
You and Boden are not the only people who had to grow up without parents. ”
Her body crumples, and I catch her, pulling her into a tight hug. She sobs into my shoulder, and her tears quickly soak me.
“I know, I know,” I whisper into the top of her head, stroking her soft hair. “I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry, darling girl.” I lower her to the ground, and she curls into me, crying.
We just sit on the damp forest floor, her whimpering into my neck, my cheek pressed to the top of her head. Me rocking her, while I rub her back, offering whatever comfort I’m able to give.
“Oh, sweet girl, it’s alright, I’ve got you.” My phone keeps vibrating in my pocket, probably the group chat blowing up after posts of tonight have undoubtedly made it to social media.
After a while, she sniffles and looks up at me, her long lashes clumped together with tears. She looks so heartbreakingly beautiful, like a disheveled fallen angel—scraped, bloody, and broken by her fall.
“Do you hate me?” she whispers, so softly I almost don’t hear her.
“No. No, I do not,” I murmur and brush stray tears from her cheeks.
“I thought I should hate you. But I don’t think I could if I tried.
” How could anyone hate her? Someone so earnest, so ardent?
We all have our own ways of dealing with tragedy and trauma.
Life could have made her cold like Nik, or fastidious like Kian, or a perfectionist like Boden, or overly discerning like me.
But instead she’s like Teariki; she’s managed to maintain levity—like a ray of sunshine amongst all this dark. I think I may like to keep her.
“Because of my family?” She untangles her arms from around me, settling close to my side.
“That and you seem to have captured quite a lot of Teariki’s attention.” I offer her a sad smile.
Her brows pinch together. “Why would—” She bites the soft edge of her lip. “Oh. You and him?”
I hum in agreement. I figure I should give her some small piece of me, having just witnessed so much of her. And having done nothing to stop it.
“How can you…” Her question trails off. But I know what she’s asking. How can we be together? The answer is pretty simple, we can’t. I’m just not ready to admit that out loud yet.
“It’s complicated.” I wrap my arm around her exposed shoulder, and she settles deeper into my side.
She’s cold and clutching her tattered dress.
“We care for each other, but we aren’t committed or anything—it can’t ever be more serious.
” The fog swirls along the forest floor.
I’ve never talked to anyone other than Ariki about this.
“That seems…hard.” She offers me a sympathetic smile. We sit in silence, both lost in our thoughts. She eventually sighs quietly. “How can I make Boden not hate me? Or at least leave me alone?”
“He doesn’t hate you.” I push a stray curl out of her eyes.
“He just hates… Well, it’s not my story to tell.
” In truth, he doesn’t hate her, he hates himself.
He’s always had survivor’s guilt from losing his mothers and three siblings in the Dark Sun’s attack.
By trying to atone for it, he takes on too much responsibility for things he has no control over.
I’ve always gotten the sense that he thinks that if he’s perfect enough, it will somehow make everything worth it.
She’s silent for a moment. “What about Katri? Why does she actively go out of her way to pull this kind of shit? It seems like so much effort.” Lena twirls the stem of a yellow leaf between her fingers.
“Ah, well, that’s a long story. One, I guess, you should know.
” I rub my thumb over her shoulder where my hand rests.
This night turned out so shitty. “Katri’s mother, Veera, died shortly after the Sun Wars.
Unlike most other noble families, the Astors managed to avoid battle.
Regent Astor is a lifelong politician and was a close advisor to Boden’s mothers, but not much of a warrior.
And while Veera was known for her proficiency with light magic, she also never answered the crown’s call for fighters.
Plus, by the end of the Sun Wars, she had a young child and another on the way.
There are rumors that Veera’s daughter and unborn child were illegitimate—the result of an ongoing affair. I don’t know if it’s true.”
Lena’s wide eyes search mine.
“I guess the affair began sometime before Katri was born. A few years before the final battle, whispers spread that alluded to Veera’s lover being your father.
” I huff out a quiet sigh. This rumor hurt the Astors’ reputation greatly.
It also explains why Katri is as cutthroat and as determined as she is to live up to the image of the perfect noble heiress.
“After the war, the Dark Suns were hunted down and tried as traitors. When Adrik was captured and imprisoned, Katri’s mother ran.
Veera was found and executed for her part in the rebellion and for harboring Adrik.
Some people are under the impression that you and Katri are, well… ”
“They think we’re sisters.” Lena lets out a strangled breath. “And that’s why she’s so actively committed to the theory that I’m half human. It would mean we don’t share a mother.”
“That’s my guess, yes.” I run my hand through my hair.
There is no proof to the theory that Veera is Lena’s mother, but it’s a popular rumor.
“And then, well, Katri’s insignis as a seraphim, and coming from the house she does, makes her a prime candidate for betrothal to Boden.
Thus making her a contender for the future queen to the Throne of Light.
You showing up here throws a wrench into that potential future.
” I huff out a low laugh. A lot of people assume they’ll end up together.
Although I know Boden respects her, I don’t believe his feelings extend any further than friendship.
“Because her sister being a traitor’s daughter would damage her reputation further?” Lena raises one beautifully arched eyebrow at me.
“Correct,” I confirm and mumble, “Among other things.”
“Because, technically, I suppose I’m a direct descendant of some lost princess?” A minimally amused smile spreads across Lena’s lips.
Now it’s my turn to arch an eyebrow. “You know about that?” And if she knows about that, what else could she be aware of?
She scoffs at me, shaking her head. “I may not have some posh degree, but I can read, you know.”
“Well then, yes,” I admit. “You being of a royal line complicates things.”
“Because now I’m also a potential bride for Boden?” She smiles humorlessly.
My heart skips a beat. I didn’t even think of that; she is a direct competitor for Katri and any other seraphim looking to marry into royalty.
We were so focused on Lena making a bid through the Challenge, or outside of the Epoch like her father, that we never stopped to consider what other ways she could come into power.
As a powerful seraphim from a royal house, she’s Katri’s biggest competition for Boden’s future wife.
Lena rolls her eyes. “Well, you can assure her, I have no intentions toward her boyfriend. He’s kind of an asshole. I know that gets some girls going, but that’s not really my thing.” She quirks her lips.
“You prefer your lovers to be sweet to you?” I can’t help but ask.
She waves her hand casually. “I’m not into nonconsensual degradation.”
“But consensual degradation?” I glance sideways at her with heightened attention.
She blushes. A shy smile dances at the corners of her lips as she fiddles with the moss around her ankles. Interesting.