Chapter 19
CHAPTER NINETEEN
For months, a heaviness had always settled upon Caelian’s chest whenever she woke.
Like she was being crushed beneath the weight of a boulder and couldn’t catch her breath.
Her body was always too heavy. Her eyes were swollen, the skin beneath them marred from exhaustion.
And her temples were usually throbbing, a dull, pulsing ache that never quite went away.
But this morning, everything had been lifted.
Her lungs expanded fully, filling with air.
There was no drumming headache, no puffiness around her eyes.
Likely because she hadn’t cried herself to sleep.
Her bones didn’t feel weary, and for the first time in what felt like an eternity, despair didn’t hold her in its icy grip. In fact, she almost felt…normal.
Save for her heart and the gaping hole left behind from her lack of magic.
Tiny ribbons of grayish light slipped between the drapes framing the only window in the room.
She could only assume it was the early hour of dawn, though it was difficult to tell in a land perpetually cloaked in gloom.
Easing herself up from the bed and propping her hands behind her, she glanced about the room.
Dying embers burned in the hearth, their waning glow casting the nest of dragon eggs in amber light.
And sprawled in one of the high-back chairs was Kjeld with his eyes closed, arms folded across his chest, and legs kicked out before him.
Even in sleep he looked disgruntled, a tiny line marring his brow, like he didn’t trust the world of dreams.
Caelian crept from the bed, unabashedly naked, and sifted through the pile of clothing Queen Viktoria had left for her.
There wasn’t much in the way of appropriate traveling clothes. Heavy silks and leathers, rough lace, and smothering satin were hardly ideal. But she would have to make do.
Caelian opted for the least irritating material—a plum satin skirt dripping with gold beads, a cream-colored blouse with open, flowing sleeves, and a black corset that thankfully hooked up the front as opposed to one with ribbons down the back.
She grabbed a pair of heels because the boots were covered in mud, then crept across the floorboards toward the bathing suite.
Her plan had been to freshen up and do her best not to disturb Kjeld, but his rumbling, sleepy voice caught her off guard.
“You needn’t tiptoe around me.”
She spun around to face him, biting back the habitual apology on the tip of her tongue.
“I heard the shift in your heartbeat the moment you woke.” Kjeld shrugged, then stretched, the chair creaking beneath his weight as he unfolded his massive frame, reaching his large arms above his head. “Fae senses and all that.”
His summer blue eyes, heavy with sleep, flicked to her.
Despite her best efforts to remain unaffected by him, her stomach fluttered.
“Yes. Well.” She jerked her head toward the bathing suite. “I’m just going to…”
Caelian didn’t bother finishing her sentence and slipped inside the adjoining room.
She went through the motions of brushing her teeth and washing her face but didn’t bother with her hair.
It was still in a messy braid from the night before and she wore it well.
She fiddled with a few of the flyaways, attempting to tame them into place, but she was stalling.
Her words to Kjeld last night had been strong.
She’d spoken from her heart, from a place inside her she barely recognized, and though it made her ache, she knew it had been necessary.
It was the first step in her recovery from making the tragic mistake of loving a male who did not love her in return.
Caelian assumed she had wasted enough time in the bathing suite, but when she opened the door and stepped into the bedroom, she drew up short, her gaze devouring the magnificence of Kjeld in all his glory.
He was pulling up a new pair of pants, giving her a full view of his sculpted buttocks.
He was shirtless, and her gaze tracked all the lines, the expanse of his broad shoulders, and the bulge of his impressive biceps.
The muscles of his back rippled with every movement, and when he fastened the last button, he turned around to face her.
She swore he was carved from granite, shaped by the hands of a god.
Or a goddess, most likely. The rune tattoos along his neck blended with other unrecognizable objects and swirls, crawling all over his left shoulder and down the length of his arm, stopping just above his elbow.
His stomach was chiseled, defined to perfection, and there was a slight dusting of hair across his chest and navel, disappearing beneath the waistband of his pants.
She already knew what that part of him looked like, and the image of him fisting his cock in the forest flooded her memory.
Warmth siphoned through her, spilling into her veins, spreading through her belly then lower still.
Caelian’s tongue was papery, her throat dry and thick. And when Kjeld cleared his throat, her gaze snapped to his face.
“Apologies, my lady.” He grabbed a fresh shirt of gray cotton and tugged it over his head. “I meant to finish getting dressed before you came back into the room.”
He didn’t look the least bit sorry.
In fact, he looked as though she’d unknowingly inflated his ego.
“It’s fine,” she muttered, collecting the rest of her things, shaking off the distraction of him. “We should prepare to leave. Though I worry you have not gathered the information necessary to report back to Ariesian. Perhaps you should stay, and I will—”
“Out of the question.” He cut her off before she could finish speaking, pulling on a black leather vest. “Besides, I learned enough about Queen Viktoria these past three days while you slept.”
Caelian steeled her spine into place, adjusting and readjusting the blouse that swept from her shoulders yet somehow managed to suffocate her. “Is that so?”
“Indeed.” Kjeld stalked past her and walked into the bathing suite, leaving the door open as he scrubbed his face, the scruff lining his jaw having grown into a beard.
“Her magic is quite powerful. She knows exactly who we are, why we’re here.
She knew we weren’t engaged, though she mentioned we were quite good at pretending. ”
Caelian ducked her head when Kjeld met her gaze in the reflection in the mirror. “I see. Next, I imagine you’ll tell me she knew we were coming here before our arrival.”
“Honestly, it would not surprise me if she did, given her sort of magic.” He quickly brushed his teeth, then examined the length and shape of his facial hair in the onyx mirror.
She debated turning away, giving him some privacy, but then he flattened his palms on the counter, glancing over at her. “She can walk through dreams, Caelian.”
“What?” Surely she must have misheard. “You cannot be serious. I didn’t think that sort of magic existed.”
“It does exist. And she’s in possession of it. That’s how she meets with Ariesian, how she’s able to reach him and his mind, through his dreams.” Kjeld roughed a hand over his face, smoothing his beard. “No wonder she knew everything about us, she’s already seen it.”
Wrapping her arms around herself, Caelian considered this new bit of information.
The ability to control dreams was an entirely different sort of magic than what she was usually accustomed to, as most fae in Aeramere’s power stemmed from the natural and celestial worlds.
But dreams? To create them, ruin them, manipulate them…
that was something else altogether. For Queen Viktoria to even be able to reach Ariesian, oceans apart, without ever having met him…
then she was most certainly a fearsome creature to behold.
And Caelian would have to be extremely cautious. So would Ariesian, for that matter.
“And what of you?” Kjeld pushed away from the counter and stood in the doorway separating the bathing suite from the bedroom.
He lifted his arms overhead, grabbing the wooden frame, and Caelian tried to ignore the way his muscles flexed.
The way he seemed to press in on her without even trying.
“Did you learn anything from Elder Lothaire before…”
Before her magic returned for a breath and she fainted.
“Your episode,” he finished quietly, his bright blue eyes intent.
She had learned that vampires, more specifically fae vampires, were incredibly sexual in nature.
Lothaire aroused every last one of her senses, to the point where she was practically incoherent with desire.
He was carnal. Lustworthy. But she wouldn’t voice such things to Kjeld. Instead, she opted for a safer option.
“He took Queen Viktoria in when she had nowhere else to go. I’m not sure if he raised her, but it sounded as though that could very well be the case.
” She toyed with the lace edge of her corset, slowly lifting her gaze only to find Kjeld’s eyes trained on her.
Calm. Calculating. And a shadow of something else she didn’t want to see.
Caelian abruptly took a step back. “He said he is in Brackroth at her request, and I don’t know about you, but if the queen is visiting my brother frequently in his dreams, then I’m not even sure why we’re here.
Certainly he would know by now if she meant Aeramere any harm. ”
“A fool’s errand, it would seem.” Kjeld nodded slowly, agreeing.