Chapter 31
thirty-one
Ainsley
“ Y es, Mr. Krispen, I’m sure.”
“I don’t understand. You got the exact position you wanted,” he says, pacing the room. “You wrote one of the most evocative pieces this company has seen, we gave you carte blanche to write about politics, and you want to quit?” he asks, clearly mystified.
I’m sure to anyone else this looks like a mistake, but ... it’s not. It’s Lachlan.
It’s the man I love, and he’s a dumbass, but there’s no one else in the world for me.
So I’m going out on a high note and searching for jobs.
“It’s truly what I want.”
“To be unemployed in New York City?”
I smile. “I’m moving to Ember Falls.”
He groans and tosses his hands up. “For the love of God. You fell in love, didn’t you?”
“I did,” I answer honestly.
“Of course you did. That’s why this article reads like a love letter.”
I shrug because that’s exactly what it is, and when it prints in three days, he’ll see exactly how I feel as I’m standing at his door .
“I think it was you who said writers who speak from their soul tell more than an article. They tell a story that’s rich and engaging ...”
“I was drunk.”
A laugh escapes from my lips. “I don’t think so.”
“No, I wasn’t, but ... I may have been hard on you, Ainsley, but it’s because I saw true talent. You were able to take a mundane topic that would be black and white and paint it in Technicolor. You’re gifted and I hate the idea of you leaving.”
I hate the idea of it, but not the reality. I want to continue doing what I love, especially now that I have free rein to write what I want, but at the same time, it’s not what I need.
I need Lachlan.
I don’t want to go back to a life without him.
“Would you give up everything for your wife?”
Mr. Krispen sighs. “I’m assuming there’s no way to change your mind on it?”
I shake my head.
His buzzer cuts off any chance at a reply. “Mr. Krispen, umm, a Mr. Knight is here. I’m sending him in.”
My boss’s eyes go wide as saucers. “The owner is here. Shit.”
A moment later there’s a knock on the door and Mr. Krispen nearly hurdles over the desk to get there quickly.
“Mr. Knight, hello.”
A very handsome man with light-blue eyes nods and smiles. “Charles, good to see you.” Then he looks to me. “Hello, I’m Carson Knight.”
I take his extended hand. “Ainsley MacKinley.”
“Well, this works out great,” Carson says. “I actually came here to meet you.”
Mr. Krispen clears his throat. “I apologize if I missed an email.”
He shakes his head. “You didn’t.”
Watching my boss nearly crap himself is pretty entertaining, but as intimidating as this man is, and he is, he pales in comparison to the Admiral .
“You wanted to meet me?” I ask.
Carson turns his attention to me. “Yes, I received an advance copy of the paper, as usual, and read your article. I wanted to tell you that it was outstanding, and my wife agreed as well. She said I was an idiot who should pay closer attention to Metro NY , since the talent is underappreciated.”
I smile at that, sounding like something I would say. “It’s an honor to meet you, and I wouldn’t say we’re underappreciated, but happy for you to see how great we are.”
He chuckles. “So tell me, Ainsley MacKinley, how long have you been a member of the team here?”
“About six months.”
“Six months and this is the first article I’ve read?” He turns to Mr. Krispen. “How is that?”
“She’s actually had quite a few articles printed, but this was the first time we gave her a human-interest piece.”
Mr. Knight nods. “Impressive. Well, now that I know what great staff I have, I plan to have you write more of these.”
Of course I get noticed when I’m leaving.
I smile warmly. “You do have great staff, Mr. Knight, and I will deeply miss being a part of Metro NY . It’s been both my honor and privilege to work here.”
“That sounds like you’re leaving.”
“I am,” I say with sorrow.
“Where are you going?” Carson asks, coming farther into the room. “Surely after writing an article like that you’re not being fired?” He looks to Mr. Krispen, who is shaking his head.
“Absolutely not, Mr. Knight.”
“Please, call me Carson, Charles. We’ve had this conversation.”
Mr. Krispen looks like he might be sick. “Of course, sir.”
Carson grins and turns to me. “If you’re not being fired, then why would you be quitting?”
“Can I be honest?”
“I’d hope you would be.”
I smile. “I fell in love with the man in the article—more than I already did before I went there.”
He laughs once. “Did you?”
“Yes, we grew up together—it was a thing—but I’d rather give up everything than live my life without him.”
“My wife would love you,” Carson says with a grin as he sits on the couch and motions for me to do the same. “And I’m assuming this man in the article feels the same?”
“I think so.”
Carson leans back. “You think? You’re taking a pretty big chance on love.”
“I am.”
That seems to impress him in some way. “In business and in life, sometimes that’s what we have to do. Buying this paper, for instance, was a bit of both.”
The purchase of our paper was a huge thing. One day we were owned by a different company, and then Metro NY was bought by Carson Knight. No one knew why or how, but the staff who didn’t agree to his rules were let go, and everyone else stayed. We didn’t print for about a month, though.
“I think, sometimes, the biggest risks bring the greatest rewards,” I explain.
“I’d agree. Let me ask you, what would it take to get you to stay?”
I shake my head. “I don’t think ...”
“Don’t answer too fast. Is there a dollar value? A promotion?” Carson asks.
“No.”
He nods once. “I see. So it’s Ember Falls or bust?”
I grin at that. “Pretty much. I think, if I stayed, I’d be unhappy and then leave anyway. It’s better that I take the leap now.”
He gets to his feet and starts to pace. “I don’t think that’s going to work for me.”
I blink. “I’m sorry. What? ”
Carson turns to me. “I don’t like letting competent people go. Let’s negotiate.”
“Mr. Knight, I have nothing to negotiate.”
“Bullshit. There’s always a compromise.”
“Okay,” I say, knowing there really isn’t. “Move the paper to Ember Falls.”
He chuckles. “Starting at a pretty lofty place, I see.”
I shrug. “I’m giving you my terms.”
“Okay, then. Stay here and I’ll give you a large raise where you’ll be able to travel there easily.”
I shake my head. “I’m afraid that won’t work. I spent years away from him. I don’t want to endure another few years.”
His light-blue eyes turn soft. “I understand that more than you would think. Okay, how about this? You don’t quit and you get to keep the man you love?”
“I don’t see how that would work,” I say, feeling defeated.
He sits back down on the couch, and then steeples his fingers. “I believe in keeping good people in my company. When I purchased this paper, my thought was to just shut it down, but my wife encouraged me to keep it running and not have anyone willing to agree to the new company terms lose their jobs. Since then, I’ve just sort of let it do its thing, checking each circulation, not getting overly involved, but then I got this publication.” He leans forward. “And I read your article and wanted to come here, see more, learn about the talent we have that clearly is being underutilized.”
“I’m not sure what to say,” I admit. “I was only doing this article to be able to write the stories I was passionate about.”
“And what stories are those?”
I smile, imagining the things I would want to tackle. “World issues, politics, national issues where we could actually make a difference. I want to write about things people care about or should care about. Thought-provoking stories that make us want to be better, do better.”
Carson gets to his feet. “Here’s what I propose, you write those stories for this paper—from wherever it is that you were going to move to. You can work remotely and come up once a month for the major meetings.”
All the oxygen is sucked out of the room and I gasp. “What? Mr. Knight?—”
“Carson.”
“Carson, that’s an extremely generous offer, but how? The paper is here.”
He tilts his head slightly. “Do they have the internet wherever this man lives?”
“Of course, but . . .”
“But?”
I don’t even know what I was going to say. Clearly, I’m a dummy because he just offered me everything I want and I’m arguing.
“I don’t know, I just ... I came in here and gave my notice, and now you’re telling me I can keep my job and move to Ember Falls.”
Carson grins. “I’m just happy I came in before you left then.”
“Me too.”
“So you’ll stay at Metro NY ?”
I stand, tug on my shirt to straighten it, and nod. “It’ll be my pleasure.”
Now to go home and pack and prove that he’s my choice.
“I’m going to miss you so much. Who else is going to window-shop with me and ride out to Brooklyn so we can go to that bookstore for only romance books or go get pizza at midnight?” Caroline slumps in my desk chair.
“I’ll miss you, too, but now you have a reason to leave the city,” I say, knowing that’s not exactly a good thing.
If Caroline could, she’d never leave Manhattan. It has everything she needs, and she feels it’s far superior to anywhere else.
While I’ve loved every minute I’ve spent in this city, I’m ready to go where it feels like home .
“I’m not sure about that.”
I grin. “Well, it gives me a reason to come back.”
“So what exactly is the full agreement?” she asks as I’m cleaning off my desk, putting things in a box.
“I’m going to remain a reporter for Metro NY but write what I want, kind of. I can cover politics or anything that I’ve pitched since I started here.”
“That’s amazing.”
“I just have to convince Lachlan that we can actually be a couple and ask if I can move in.” I let out a nervous giggle.
That’s the only kink in my plans. There’s not a lot of real estate or rental options in Ember Falls. I have, like, three choices. The cabin in the woods, Lachlan’s house, or sleeping in my car. So, really, I have one option.
“That’s going to go over well.”
“Yeah, this plan is flawed.”
Caroline pushes back, tossing her legs up on my desk. “You’ll be so much closer to DC too.”
“Yeah, that’ll be the good thing. I can get there in a few hours to cover anything big.”
Although I really want to focus on smaller-level government issues to start. I want to talk about what will give immediate help to others.
“I know that politics and all that is what you really wanted to write about, but this article about Lachlan is really good. You should consider more human-interest pieces, just maybe not athletes.”
I laugh and lean against the edge. “I think I did okay.”
“Look, most people didn’t even know Ultimate Frisbee was a thing, so you could’ve written anything about the rules and no one would know.”
“I’m pretty sure I could do the sports reporting.”
“No.”
I laugh and then let out a long sigh. “I’m going to miss you.”
Caroline was the first friend I made here. I was this sheltered military brat from Virginia Beach who felt as though I was dropped off in another world. Caroline was in the room across the hall, and we instantly clicked.
She was from Jersey and spent most of her teenage years taking the train into the city, so I had a tour guide.
“I always thought you and I would be like Carrie and Charlotte, always living here, but you’d marry well, and I’d still be writing in my apartment.”
I thought the same. “I’m not sure I’m Charlotte. I feel like I’m more Samantha.”
She laughs at that. “You’re not tough enough.”
“Whatever. I can be tough.”
“You can be, but you’re not jaded yet. The city only gave you a few scratches. You haven’t felt the deep cuts.” Caroline stands, helping put more things in the box. “I’m proud of you, Ainsley.”
“What? Why?”
“Because you’re going after what you want, no matter what obstacles are in your way.”
“Well, it’s one large obstacle that I may not be able to get around.”
Especially if he remains his normal stubborn self.
“You’ll get around it or over it or on top of it.” We both laugh and she nudges me. “Seriously, if he doesn’t see how amazing you are, then he doesn’t deserve you, and you come back here.”
“I think he knows. I just think he’s scared.”
The sky opened up when I was three blocks from my apartment, soaking my cardboard box with the contents of my desk, and I look like a drowned rat.
Seriously, today went from being sort of amazing to ending in a crazy mess.
Lachlan didn’t answer my calls or texts, and I want to at least tell him about meeting my boss. I plan to just show up tomorrow with a suitcase and be like, I’m not leaving until you stop being stupid .
That’s the best plan I’ve got.
My bad luck changes a little when a neighbor is holding the door open.
“Thank you.”
He smiles. “No problem. It’s really coming down out there.”
I nod. “It is.”
I make my way up the stairs, my hair and clothes sticking to me, and I do thank God I wore black and not a white shirt today. When I get to the top of the stairs, I put the soaked box down, brush my soppy wet hair back, and fish for my keys.
“Do you need help with that?”
The voice causes my breath to catch. I lift my eyes and see Lachlan crouching beside me with a smile on his face and flowers in his hands.
“Lachlan? What are you doing here?”
“Let me help you and I’ll explain.”
My heart is pounding, and I’m one of those stupid people on television who look dumbstruck and can’t speak. “Here, these are for you.”
I take the most gorgeous bouquet of roses I’ve ever seen. “Wow.”
“They’re called Juliet roses.”
“Well, they’re stunning. You came here to bring me flowers?” I ask. I’m hoping that he came here to bring me home, but I tamper that hope down.
“Come on, we’ll talk inside.” He grabs my box of stuff from the office, and we head to my apartment. My nerves are going bananas, and it takes me three tries to get the key in the lock.
Lachlan brings the box inside after I open the door. He looks around, taking in my mismatch of an apartment. Nothing goes together, and yet somehow it seems like it all belongs. One of the articles I wrote about was how fun antique shopping can be, which required me to spend a lot of time doing it.
In the end, I learned it actually was fun.
However, he’s not here about antiquing or my apartment .
I go to speak, my mouth open, and he steps forward, talking first. “I need to say something.”
I close my mouth and nod.
Lachlan steps toward me. “I was stupid.”
This is off to a good start. “Yes, you were, but what exactly are you talking about?”
“I thought that if I made the hard decision for you, that it would hurt us both less. You wouldn’t regret leaving a job, a city, and a life you love. I thought if I took away the choice, and I bore the brunt of it, then you’d be happy, and you wouldn’t hate me. In my head, it made perfect sense, but then I spent the last few days without you, wishing I wasn’t so stupid and didn’t push you away.”
I cross my arms over my soaking-wet chest and nod. “I guess that’s not working out so well?”
He laughs and comes closer. “It’s not. You see, I love you, Ainsley MacKinley. I love you more than I have ever thought possible. I’m not asking you to choose me, because I choose you. If that means I have to move to this city to have you, then so be it. If it means I’m on a flight every weekend or taking a train or driving. No matter what, I’ll do it.”
My eyes widen. “But Rose.”
She was his biggest worry, and I understand that he needs to put her first.
“Rose loves you too. We both do, and I think that love is what matters, don’t you?” His right hand cups my cheek. “I think that you matter, we matter, and I choose you, however I can have you. If it means we fly back and forth until we figure out what’s next, then that’s what we do, but we make that decision together. I’m not making choices for you, and you’re not for me. I never want to take things from you, sweetheart. I just want to give you the world, whatever I can. I want to make plans, build a life together. I want you. No, I need you, Ainsley.”
A tear falls down my cheek. “That’s good, because I quit my job.”
“You what? ”
“I quit today. That’s why I have that box. See, I wasn’t going to let you choose to be done with me. I’m not done. We’re not done. I love you, and I do not want to be in this city if it means I can’t have you.”
Lachlan pulls me into his arms, kissing the top of my head. “Call them and get your job back. I’ll move. I’ll find a way to make this work. Please, baby. I need you to have all your dreams.”
I shake my head. “That’s the thing. They wouldn’t let me quit.”
“No?”
“No. The owner came because he read my article, and he told me I shouldn’t have to choose between them when there’s internet in Ember Falls. I’m going to be able to keep my job and move.”
He smiles, cupping my face. “You’re serious?”
“Yes, I know we’re extremely new to dating, but I’d like to move to Ember Falls. I can look for a place close by?—”
He cuts me off by sealing his mouth to mine. “Ainsley MacKinley, you’ll live with me.”
I hoped he’d say that. “You’re sure? It’s really quick and ... Rose.”
“Rose is the one who told me I better come get you and bring you home.”
I smile. “She did?”
“We talked. I told her that I loved you and wanted you to come back. She was very happy when I told her I was coming here to win you over.”
My hand rests on his chest, and I stare up into his beautiful eyes. “We haven’t been together long. I don’t want it to feel too sudden.”
“Is it? I feel like we’ve been dancing around a relationship for a really long time.”
“I know I’ve been in love with you for most of my life, but this is different.”
Lachlan closes his eyes and rests his forehead on mine. “Live with me. Please. ”
How the hell could I ever say no to that? “I would love to.”
He lifts his head and kisses me softly. “You’re going to be okay leaving this place?” he asks with a little shake in his voice.
“I know all too well what it feels like to live without you, Lachlan, and I don’t want to ever do it again. I’ll live in a cardboard box as long as it means I’m with you.”
“Then let’s go home.”
But before we do, we kiss, and he makes love to me on the floor of the apartment.