Chapter 36
Thirty-Six
Enoch
I wiped my sweaty palms on my work pants, trying to gain some semblance of calm before I stepped into the storm.
I’d been rehearsing my apologies in my head all day and nothing I said ever came out right.
I had no fucking excuse for my behavior, and I knew my family would be looking for an explanation.
I kept circling back to the fact that maybe this was all a sign that I needed to finally tell my family the truth about my alcohol addiction. I needed to stop being a coward and grow up.
I finally punched in the code on the door, pushing it open. I’d stalled too long and now I was risking running late for Jae’s pre-opening night dinner party.
The house was loud with chatter but as the alarm rang out my entrance, someone shushed loudly.
“Nox? Is that you?” My mom’s head came into view as she leaned over the banister from upstairs. “Oh, good.”
I shot her a smile before focusing on removing my boots. My heart was pumping loudly in my chest as I sent a silent prayer for courage. I left my work backpack in the hall closet and climbed the stairs. My family was scattered around the living room and kitchen, all looking dressed and ready to go.
Jae held my eye contact, giving me a small smile.
The shittiest part in all of this was that I was overshadowing Jae’s big night with the negative energy I brought into the room.
I cleared my throat, feet already guiding me to my bedroom.
“I’ll just be a minute, if you need to leave to make the reservation, go ahead.”
I nodded as Jae said they had time and closed my bedroom door. I was quick to change into a pair of slacks and a dress shirt, matching the dress code that everyone else had followed. Jae’s parents had made a reservation at what they’d described as a ‘nice’ restaurant.
I made sure to reapply some deodorant in my bathroom.
I smiled to myself when I remembered that I had to steal some of Shiloh’s this morning after I showered at her place.
It probably made me a freak that I liked smelling like her, or more so liked the fact that she used a scent that reminded me of the one I wore.
Made me nostalgic for the time we'd spent together in high school and she wore my clothes and showered with my soaps.
I liked that she liked to smell like me.
I shook the thoughts away, grabbing a new toothbrush from beneath the sink as I had left mine at Shiloh’s. After messing with my hair for a minute, I gave myself one last look in the mirror before returning to the living room.
Everyone’s eyes landed on me, and I quickly averted my gaze to the stairs, motioning for us to get going.
It was awkward as hell as I climbed into my car and my mom, dad and Esther filled the seats. It was clear I needed to say something, but I worried that if I apologized now, it would lead to a bunch of questions I didn’t want to answer while driving. Especially not when the rain picked up.
It seemed to be mirroring the atmosphere in the car, so Iswitched on the radio, turning up the music to a comfortable level that hopefully interrupted the silence enough to discourage them from striking up a deep conversation.
I pulled up the family group chat to find the address to the restaurant and pulled out of the driveway.
Unfortunately, the music didn’t deter my father, who was in the front seat beside me, from watching me. I tried to ignore it as I focused on the road, but the weight on my chest got heavier the longer he stared and I stayed silent.
My mom spoke up about halfway to the restaurant. “So…how long ya been datin’ your girlfriend?”
I was prepared for the question and turned down the volume on the radio.
“Six weeks.”
“Wow. How’d y’all two meet?” My mom asked, clearly trying hard to conceal how excited she was to hear the details.
“Um,” I flicked the wipers on to a higher speed, “I met her at a work event.”
“So, she’s active duty too?” my dad asked. “That must be nice, to be with someone who understands your work commitments.”
“No,” I shook my head. “She just happened to be at the location where the event was held. She’s a civilian.”
“Oh.” My mom hummed and I glanced in the rearview mirror to see she had turned her attention out her window.
“Sounds pretty serious,” my dad said after a few moments of silence. “If you’re staying at her house.”
I nodded, unsure what to say. It was definitely serious, but how did I explain that we hadn’t known each other for just six weeks. That our story began five years ago. That I already loved her. Had practically proposed to her last night.
Jae’s call interrupted the awkward silence and I answered.
“Hey.”
“I found parking. There’s space in the garage one block behind.”
“Okay, thanks. We’re a minute out.”
“See you soon.”
I ended the call, adjusting my hands on the steering wheel. Fuck, this was painful.
“I wanted to apologize for my behavior yesterday,” I rushed out, glancing in the mirror to see my mom and sister’s reactions.
They both turned their heads to meet my eyes in the mirror.
“I shouldn’t have spoken to either of you the way that I did. And I’m sorry.”
My mom reached forward, squeezing my shoulder.
“Thanks, honey. I knew ya didn’t mean it.”
No, at the time I really fucking did. When she dropped her hand, I rolled my shoulders back. Esther remained silent and I accepted the sadness that followed the increased guilt.
She had a right to still be upset with me.
I sighed and pulled into the parking garage, looking for Jae’s car as I drove through the aisles until I found a spot near his.
When I stepped out of the car, my mom pulled me into a hug, and I forced a smile as I hugged her back.
We ran into Eden, Seb and the kids at the crosswalk. They were too preoccupied keeping the kids from splashing in a giant puddle to strike up conversation and we all just wanted to get out of the rain. I cursed myself for not grabbing an umbrella from the hall closet before we left.
After shaking off the rain, which had soaked through my shirt quite a bit, we followed the hostess as she led us to the table that Jae, his parents, and Baba and Ded were seated at.
They stood, greeting us as if we hadn’t just seen each other a few minutes ago at the house and I took the chair at the end of the table across from Uncle Q, hoping my mom would sit next to me so I didn’t have deal with any awkwardness from someone else.
I wasn’t lucky enough.
Sebastian took the chair next to me, helping Benji into the chair beside him.
The hostess let us know our waiter would be by shortly for drinks or starters.
I was actively ignoring the fact that there was a large bar taking up the length of the wall in front of me, regretting not choosing to sit on the bench seat on the opposite side of the table that had a view of the ocean.
I rolled my neck, trying to ease some of the tension in my shoulders as I opened the menu in front of me.
At least the alcohol had its own separate menu that thankfully wasn’t placed beside mine.
I cleared my throat, shifting in my seat as I looked up to give Jae a silent look. Holy shit, this place is expensive.
I flicked my eyes down to the menu and he winced. He mimed sending me a text and my brows furrowed. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and realized I did in fact have a text from him.
You’ll have to confirm with the chef what hasn’t been cooked with alcohol.
My eyes skimmed the menu. Nearly everything was cooked with alcohol. It made sense with this being a primarily seafood restaurant. I probably should have researched the menu before coming this evening.
I gave Jae a nod and he smiled, returning his full attention to his dad who had asked him a question.
I flinched as Sebastian leaned into my personal space, to speak into my ear. “What are you thinking?”
I turned my head with a questioning gaze before I realized he was referring to the menu.
“Um, not sure yet. You?”
“Probably the pasta or a burger. I’m not a fan of fish.”
I nodded in agreement. Reading the ingredients listed beneath the burger he was referring to. That sounded like the safest option for me too. I’d just have to find out if the ‘house sauce’ contained any alcohol. Surely they had a kids menu. Would it have been weirder if I just ordered off of that?
It was several long minutes of listening to my family chat before the waiter arrived.
“Hi folks, I’m Mike, I’ll be taking care of you tonight. What are we all dressed for this evening? A birthday?”
“No,” Uncle Q answered with a smile, throwing his arm over the back of Jae’s chair. “We’re celebrating my son’s business opening tomorrow.”
Mike gasped with a wide smile, “Congratulations! Can I get some cocktails going, or a bottle of wine for the table?”
I knew Jae was looking at me, but I ignored him as everyone actually looked toward him for direction. I had already told Jae when he texted earlier today that I was fine if they ordered alcohol for the table. I guessed they bought the lie he told them last night about him not drinking alcohol.
“Um, Dad?” Jae asked.
“You sure?” Uncle Q asked.
“Yeah. It’s fine.”
Uncle Q pursed his lips, staring at Jae for a moment longer before nodding and turning to the rest of the table. “Everyone okay with white wine?”
Everyone of drinking age at the table was in agreement, aside from myself and Jae, and the waiter asked some follow-up questions on which bottle they would like. He took drink orders for the rest of us non-drinkers and then left.
“We don’t need to drink,” Uncle Q said softly, leaning closer to Jae.
“It’s fine. I just don’t like it in the house,” Jae replied with a smile.
Uncle Q gave Jae’s shoulder a gentle squeeze before pulling away.
The waiter arrived only a few moments later, offering my Uncle the chance to taste the wine before he poured it for the table. After he gave his approval, I blocked the wine glass beside my place setting with my hand when he offered it. He nodded, swiftly moving around the rest of the table.