Chapter 12 Questioned
Questioned
Monte
Over the next week, Felix and I fell into a strange rhythm.
We were both intimately aware of one another, but neither acknowledged what we’d shared in the cottage.
We saw each other in the mornings and evenings, but he rarely returned home during the day, and when we did share meals, we hardly spoke a word.
Most distressing and reassuring at the same time was the fact that Felix kept his promise.
That night had been a one-time experience, and he made no attempts to repeat it.
When I lay next to him in bed, I yearned for his touch, yet I was grateful that he was so stubborn in his resolve.
I knew that I was teetering on the edge of losing control, and if we mated again, then I was sure that I’d form an attachment that could only break my heart in the end.
I no longer had the excuse of heat to hide behind.
For anything that happened from here on out, I would have only myself to blame.
Every night, he fell asleep facing away from me, and I drifted off to the comforting sound of his snoring.
Every morning, I woke in his embrace and waited for him to wake, at which point he pulled away and pretended it had never happened.
Fearing that he would return to the floor if I broached the subject, I said nothing at all.
But eight days after the night in the cottage, the issue was finally dragged into the open. Ironically, it happened when Felix was nowhere in sight.
After Ara and I finished driving a load of nonperishables out to the Goldfangs’ place, we stopped for a water break, and to catch our breath. Unloading and hauling the bags had been more strenuous than I’d been expecting, but at least I was pleased to be gaining a bit of muscle since my marriage.
Just then, a gray wolf stalked out of the forest’s edge.
Ara tensed at my side, but she didn’t warn me to flee, so I just sat and watched quietly, unease winding up my spine.
“Who is it?” I asked quietly.
“Wyatt. He must have been out on patrol.”
I hadn’t recognized him, as I’d never seen the Beta using his wolf or relaxing in any way, but now that she mentioned it, I could see it.
It didn’t notice us at first, as it lazily stretched and shifted back to his human form, fully naked. But then he spotted us, and his entire demeanor changed. His features darkened as he stalked toward us.
“Have you heard from Hunter?” he called out, far louder than necessary.
I winced at the volume, though there was nobody else nearby to hear. Then again, the Goldfangs might have heard every word. But even more so, seeing Wyatt naked wasn’t on my agenda for today—or any day, for that matter.
“Of course not,” I said with a defiant tilt of my chin. “I would have told Felix immediately if I had.”
Wyatt grunted noncommittally, drawing to a stop before us and folding his arms. He gave Ara a single dismissive glance before returning all his attention back to me.
“And did our Alpha mark you?”
Blood rushed to my face, and a wave of dizziness washed over me. He’d had the decency to lower his voice for that astonishingly personal question, but the shame and embarrassment still burned hot and bright.
“He didn’t, did he?” Wyatt pressed.
My lips went numb as I started to answer him, but then stopped. Why did he deserve a reply when he was being so rude, especially since he seemed to already know the answer?
And so I remained silent, eyeing him balefully. Clenching my hands into painful fists didn’t stop them from trembling, but it made the tremors less noticeable, if nothing else
A muscle twitched in Wyatt’s cheek, but I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of an answer, not when he was being so combative. I just had to hope that this was what Ara had been talking about when she’d said I needed to follow my instincts more.
“Don’t you have duties to attend to?” Ara growled at my side.
Wyatt turned his gaze on her with a long, piercing stare. He bared his fangs, but didn’t go so far as to growl back.
“The pack needs a Luna,” he snarled, turning his attention back to me. “And if you can’t fill that role, then the marriage should be dissolved, and you should leave so that Felix can find someone more suitable.”
Before I could recover from my shock at his blunt words, Wyatt shifted to his wolf and loped off into the woods to resume his patrol.
“I… I can’t believe it,” I sputtered after what felt like an eternity later.
“I can,” Ara said darkly. “Wyatt has always rubbed me the wrong way.”
“Felix has crossed a line,” I whispered, fighting back angry tears.
That caught Ara’s attention. “You think Felix put him up to this?” she asked. “You think the Alpha ordered him to say those words to you?”
“Wyatt’s loyal to a fault, and you’re the one who said that he’s Felix’s lap dog,” I snapped.
But Ara didn’t flinch at my tone. She only stared out into the darkness of the forest.
“I don’t think so,” she said slowly. “I think Wyatt might’ve been entertaining those thoughts himself. You said it yourself, he’s very loyal, so while he wouldn’t act against Felix’s wishes, he might do something of his own initiative if he thought it would serve Felix’s best interests.”
A horrible sinking sensation filled me. “Such as asking the unsuitable bride to leave because Felix is too noble to do it himself.”
“From Wyatt’s perspective,” Ara said quickly, patting my shoulder. “You’re only unsuitable from his perspective.”
“Oh,” I muttered, rubbing the back of my neck.
Why had I just reacted so strongly?
But deep down, I already knew the answer. After learning from Ara how much Felix valued directness above all else, I had felt sickeningly betrayed by the possibility that my husband was scheming behind my back, and trying to use others to confront me.
But then the rest of Wyatt’s words sunk in.
“Ara, is the Luna situation really that serious?” I asked.
She didn’t meet my eyes this time. She stared out toward the woods Wyatt had disappeared into, her brows furrowed in thought.
“Things have deteriorated quite a bit,” she admitted at last. But then she quickly patted me once more and brightened up.
“But the pack has been without a Luna for a long, long while, ever since the Alpha’s mother fled all those years ago.
It has survived this long, and it will survive a little longer. ”
Her words made the situation sink in like nothing else had.
I was married to Felix. Technically, I was his mate, but the pack hadn’t recognized me as their Luna.
Felix had made it clear from the start that what we had was temporary, that I would be passed on to Hunter whenever he returned.
And when that happened, Felix would finally be free to find his true mate.
His Luna. The person who would stand at his side and bring the Goddess’s blessing to the pack by bearing his pups.
Seeing their Alpha without a Luna was a mark of imbalance and a sign of weakness for any pack.
It was the right thing. Felix needed his own mate. I was the only one standing in his way.
My wolf stirred uneasily at the thought of someone else sharing Felix’s bed, touching him, holding him, giving him the children to continue his legacy.
I let out a shaky breath. I had no reason to feel jealous about that. None at all.
Once we returned to the house, Ara set off straight to the kitchen to help with dinner preparations. I went to the garden, hoping to check on the herbs, but I didn’t get far before I found another wolf already waiting for me.
A wolf I wanted nothing to do with.
“Out late again,” Jared mused. He leaned against the wall with folded arms, watching me with a disconcerting mixture of lazy nonchalance and hawklike focus. “Has Felix lightened up then, to allow you such free reign?”
I fought the urge to flee. I looked toward the house and saw that Ara was watching us through a small kitchen window. That gave me all the courage I needed.
“Perhaps you don’t know Felix quite as well as you think you do.” I thanked the Goddess that my voice didn’t crack as I knelt down in the soil just about as far from Jared as was possible.
His burst of laughter was even more unnerving, because it actually sounded genuine, far from the slick, calculated chuckle I expected.
“Oh I think I know him well enough.”
He moved and I tensed, waiting for him to approach, but he only shifted his stance.
“You know, I’ve been hearing talk,” he said conversationally, inspecting his fingernails. “Very interesting talk.”
I didn’t feel particularly compelled to dignify that with a response, but I didn’t want to seem rude enough to provoke him into escalating.
“Oh?” I asked, keeping almost all of my attention on a struggling patch of basil.
“Yes, people have been wondering how much longer this charade will last. When will Hunter return? When will you get yourself removed from the Alpha’s bed so that he can begin looking forward to the future of the pack?”
“I see,” I forced through gritted teeth, but my indignation was only a thin veil on the surface. Beneath, worries old and new were returning with redoubled sway.
Jared clearly wasn’t on good terms with Felix, yet he was echoing the same sentiments as Wyatt, the most loyal of Felix’s wolves. There was pressure from both sides, and neither wanted me here. Did anyone want me to stay?
I closed my eyes and tried to take deep breaths.
That was being unfair to Ara, and to some of the older wolves who were clearly thankful for my visits.
But if that was the extent of my support, then things were even worse than I’d realized.
Perhaps I’d stuck my head in the sand for too long, allowing myself to be blinded by Felix's grudging comfort and tolerance of my presence.
“And if Hunter doesn’t show up anytime soon?” Jared asked. “People around here have been saying that maybe you should go ahead and leave, dissolve the marriage, spare our Alpha the indignity. He’s too faithful to the rules to cast you aside, even when it would be the right choice.”
I hated his words, and I hated their source. Most of all, I hated how much sense he made. I didn’t know if it would have hurt less to hear these words from someone else, like Ara, but at the moment, it felt like the world was crushing the wind from my lungs.
“Don’t feel bad, it’s not your fault.” His voice was dripping with condescension. “But you should think it over, and do the right thing. For yourself, for the pack, and for Felix.”
Then he left. I had no idea how long I sat there, hunched down in the garden, staring sightlessly at the sprawling patchwork of greenery.
He was right. Leaving would make things easier for everyone.
If they really did need a Luna, then I had to go. There was really no other conclusion.
I considered talking to Felix, then laughed under my breath. Yeah, that’d go well. It’d just turn into another growling argument, followed by days of him pretending I didn’t exist.
No, I had to figure this out on my own.