Chapter Ten
Harper woke up and knew everything had changed.
She was still the same woman, but she was different. Last night had been the worst and best experience of her life. Mateo taking her virginity hadn’t been … fun. The moment he thrust inside her, the pain had shocked her to her core, and she’d tensed up. Part of her had been tempted to call an end to their night of passion, but something held her back.
Mateo had not forced her, but he’d held himself still within her, giving her a chance to become accustomed to the feel of him. No words were spoken.
The tears had fallen, but they had been so fleeting, as had the pain, and she’d been the one to start moving her hips, wanting Mateo to make love to her. No, not make love, but to fuck her.
Opening her eyes, Harper stared toward the curtain that was partially open, allowing some of the morning sunshine to spill into the room.
Mateo was still in her bed. She sensed him close, but she didn’t know if he was asleep or awake.
After their first time, Mateo had been the perfect gentleman, and like she’d read in so many of her books, he’d taken care of her, which had made her love him just a little.
She wouldn’t admit it to anyone, but it had been amazing. They shared a bath, and Mateo had been so attentive, and once they arrived in her room, he’d pulled her into his arms and whispered that he was now going to show her just how good it could be. At first, she’d been shocked. She had tensed up, but there hadn’t been any pain or discomfort.
It had been perfect, the way she had always hoped it would be. She couldn’t believe how long she had waited for this very moment.
“How are you feeling?”
Harper turned her head to see Mateo was already awake. He’d moved onto his elbow, resting his head in his hand, watching her.
“I didn’t know you were awake.”
“I watched you wake up.”
“You watched me.”
“I might have been watching you sleep for the last half hour.”
“What time is it?” she asked.
“A little after six-thirty.”
“Oh.” She became aware that the blanket was at her waist, and her breasts were on display.
Mateo reached out, putting his hand at her waist. “How are you feeling?”
“I don’t know,” she said.
He frowned.
She chuckled. “It … feels strange.” She rolled over and Mateo didn’t let her go. He kept his hand on her side. She pushed some of her hair out of the way. “I’m not … angry or upset. Is that normal?”
“I hope so,” he said.
“You’ve been with women before.” The moment she said it, she pressed her lips together, because she hated the thought of him being with any other woman. The jealousy took her by surprise.
Years ago, Franny had asked her what she would think if Mateo was with another woman at that very moment, all those years ago, and she’d responded that she didn’t care. She had meant it. Her anger and feel of betrayal had been so acute that she didn’t think for a second she would care if he’d been with another woman. Yet, now, the very thought of him being with anyone was enough to tense her up.
“I’ve not been with a woman in a long time,” Mateo said.
“How long?” she asked.
Harper didn’t know if she even wanted the answer. What if she visited her whole pack and she smelled Mateo on other women? Would she hurt them? It would certainly give him a good reason to banish her if she did attack them.
This was insane. She had never felt this way and she quickly sat up.
“Before your transition,” Mateo said.
This made her turn back toward him. “Huh?”
“I’ve not been with a woman since before your transition.”
She frowned. “You’ve not had anyone since?”
“No.”
“But … how?”
“Harper, I may have banished you and rejected you, but it didn’t stop you from being my mate. There was no other woman, and there is not going to be any other woman. You’re my mate, no one else.”
She stared at him in shock. “There wasn’t any other man for me either.”
“Good, but I did already know that. Either way, if there had been, I would have to kill any other man you had been with.”
Harper felt her wolf was close, and she wanted to close the small distance between her and Mateo. She didn’t fight it and slid closer to him, reaching out of her own volition, and gripping the back of his neck.
Mateo moved closer, and when his lips were on hers, Harper groaned. He gripped her hip, and she didn’t know how they were able to do it, but one moment she was sitting by his side, kissing him, and in the next, she was straddling his waist, wrapping her arms around his neck, and feeling the hard length of him press against her core. She wanted him inside her, and she reached down, acting without question. She needed him inside her.
Mateo growled as she wrapped her fingers around his length, and with his help, she guided him inside her.
Like their second time the previous night, this didn’t hurt. She was already so wet that he slid in deep.
His grip went to her hips, and he tightened on her, drawing her down onto his length. She cried out as with the last inch, he drew her down against his body with a slap of their flesh. It sounded so good, echoing around the walls.
“Oh, fuck, you feel so good,” he said.
Harper pulled back just a little, and Mateo ran his hands up her body, cupping her tits, playing with them before pulling her in closer. She watched as he took one nipple into his mouth, and she felt the answering pulse between her thighs.
He wasn’t too rough as he moved between each nipple. When he used his teeth, she cried out, but at no point did she want him to stop. She gripped his shoulders and began to move up and down his length, feeling him inside her. He was so large. So thick. And Harper didn’t want to stop as she felt that answering pleasure.
“That’s it, baby,” he said. “Fuck my cock.”
He let go of her tits, going back to her hips, and Mateo picked up the pace, showing her exactly what he wanted. Harper didn’t know it could be this way.
They could have been having this for seven years, but she pushed those thoughts to the back of her mind, and instead focused on what they did have right now. She wasn’t going to lose that.
One of Mateo’s hands left her hips, and he reached between them. He started to stroke her clit, and Harper stopped. One touch of her clit, and she sunk her teeth into her bottom lip. The pleasure was out of this world and with him inside her, it felt even better than the night before. Harper didn’t think it was possible to feel this good. Even her wolf was in a state of pleasure.
Something was changing between them. Deep down, Harper knew they had started to mate with one another, and it did terrify her a little, but it felt too good to deny.
****
The whole pack was tense.
For Mateo, that was the first thing he noticed that was different on the day of the full moon. Franny was already waiting outside the shop. Some places were already closed.
“Why do they close?” he asked.
“Some people like to enjoy the whole day preparing for tonight,” Harper said.
He didn’t know if she even realized it, but they were holding hands, and she had yet to shrug him off. They’d left her home, and as soon as they cleared the front yard, he’d grabbed her hand, pulling her close.
His wolf couldn’t stand any distance between them, and was constantly trying to get as close to Harper as possible. There was no way Mateo would let her go. Not after having a taste of her last night.
He’d enjoyed and hated taking Harper’s virginity. From this point on, there wasn’t going to be a moment when he wouldn’t attempt to make it up to her.
“I see you two finally worked out your differences,” Franny said. In her hand were three coffees, and he scented the cinnamon buns already. He’d come to realize cinnamon was Harper’s favorite sweet treat.
“The coffee shop is still open?”
“Yeah, only a couple of places close today,” Franny said.
Harper let them into the shop. While she wasn’t looking, Franny gave him a thumbs-up and a thumbs-down, looking at him in question, and all he could do was shrug. He had no idea if last night was the start of something great. For him, it was. He didn’t know how Harper felt.
Franny rolled her eyes, and then forced a smile to her lips as Harper turned toward them.
“I know what my job is,” Mateo said. “I’m checking the stock that came in last night, and you were a little pissed with how they dropped off the order. I’m already on it.” He took his coffee and package of cinnamon buns, and made his way into the stockroom.
This was where Harper always sent him, but he found ways of drawing her back to him. He did stop a few feet inside, and attempted to listen.
“You don’t look like you want to murder him, that’s got to be a good sign, right?”
Harper laughed. “Yeah, it is.”
“So, did you take my advice? You look like you took my advice.”
He smiled.
“Yeah, I took your advice.”
“And? Come on, Harper, was I a genius?”
He heard Harper sigh. “You’ll only know if you are a genius tonight.”
Franny groaned. “At least tell me if it was good? You need to give a girl a clue here.”
Harper chuckled. “Why should I? All I’m doing is exactly what you told me to do.”
“And did it feel good? Did you love it? Is it what you always hoped it would be?” Franny asked.
Harper sighed. “Yes and no, I guess. I don’t know.”
He frowned. He didn’t like how sad she finally sounded. What the fuck did he have to do to show her that things were going to be different?
“Look, take a sip of your coffee, and tell me,” Franny said.
There was silence for several seconds, and then Harper released another sigh, and he heard her move.
“I don’t know, I guess I’m scared.”
“What would you have to be scared of?”
“The rest of our lives, Franny. Don’t you see, yes, for now, he wants to stick around, and last night was one of the best nights of my life, but don’t forget why I did it.”
Franny groaned. “Don’t think of it like that.”
“I did it so at least I had a choice before tonight. None of us know how our wolves are going to react.”
“I thought your wolf hated Mateo,” Franny said.
“She did, but I don’t know, I guess the whole closeness makes the heart grow fonder. I don’t know. All I know is something is different. I’m nervous, but for some reason, she isn’t. She trusts him.”
“And does that bother you?” Franny asked.
“A little. I don’t know if I can trust him. I don’t know if this is all a ruse or what. I don’t know, and that part is where I’m totally going crazy.”
“Why don’t you forgive him and talk to him, and try to move past it?”
He heard Harper sigh. “You know what, I want to do that, but I can’t help feeling that a part of me is giving in. His rejection hurt.”
“Men are assholes, Harper. You’ve witnessed it time and time again, with male mates coming here as a last resort because they had forgotten some anniversary or birthday,” Franny said.
“Yeah, well, we’re not exactly talking about Mateo forgetting a birthday or anniversary.”
“No, you’re right, he did forget all of those.”
Mateo gritted his teeth. He had always been tempted to get her a gift to celebrate her birth, and there had even been multiple times over the last seven years where he had thought about getting her an anniversary gift, but to him it felt insensitive.
He was fucked either way. Why did he always think he knew best? He sensed his wolf agreeing with him. Fuck!
“So, once this full moon is over, you’re just going to send him back to his own pack?”
Mateo held his breath, waiting for the cruel rejected words, that he knew deep down he deserved.
And he waited.
“I don’t know,” Harper said.
There was a brief silence.
“Well, isn’t that, like, I don’t know, a shock of a lifetime?” Franny said. “I was expecting you to say you wanted nothing to do with him, and that’s final. So come on, tell me, what has changed?”
“Again, I don’t know. Nothing has changed and yet everything. It has been amazing having him around the past couple of weeks, and not just because he can lift those large boxes or anything. I’ve liked having him here.”
“I see that smile, Harper.”
Mateo remembered to take a sip of his coffee before it got too cold. It was just at the right temperature.
“I know, I feel like smiling when he’s around, and that’s crazy as well, right?”
“No, of course it’s not crazy. If anything, I think that’s more natural.”
Harper chuckled. “I don’t know what I’m going to do, because I don’t want to string him along or give him false hope. But I don’t want him to leave either. It’s all confusing.”
There was silence.
“Have you considered going back with him?” Franny asked.
“What?”
“Well, think about it. You have two choices to make. Either you choose to mate with him and go back with him, or you stay here and tell him once and for all that you and he will not work. How does that make you feel?”
“I don’t know,” Harper said. “I don’t even know if the Fox pack will accept me.”
Franny snorted. “There is no chance of that. If Mateo takes you back, he’s the alpha, they’ll accept it.”
Mateo was tempted to agree with Franny, but he didn’t want them to know he was listening. What he’d heard wasn’t total rejection, but it also wasn’t confirmation of what he wanted to hear.