Chapter 4
CHAPTER FOUR
natalie
MY THERAPIST. ANY ONE of my brothers. All four of my brothers. The teacher in high school who told me I’d never make it past my freshman year of college. The professor who said I’d never make it through med school. The charge nurse on the fourth floor of SCMC who kept us all on our toes.
All of the people I’d rather see right now than Cameron Bryant.
His brown eyes, filling me with the kind of warmth that could easily be from embarrassment or awareness—take your pick—trailed over me once, lingered, and then traveled to the man sitting across from me.
Right.
My date.
Cameron’s lips dipped into a frown. And then his entire expression pulled tight. I watched as his fingers flexed around his drink as he brought it to his mouth, not taking his eyes off the man across from me.
I realized that I’d probably given him the impression that dating wasn’t in my wheelhouse, what with the explosion of explicit content in his office and the subsequent insinuation that I had no sex life.
All that, combined with the way I’d shut him down and pushed him away that night at the bar, probably led him to believe I didn’t go out much.
And I didn’t, really.
But it wasn’t that I didn’t want to date.
Or have sex. I was just trying to be careful about how I approached the topic.
Even if I wanted to brazenly push forward on both fronts, I knew I had to be mindful of the damage my previous marriage had caused.
I would be irresponsible to ignore it—proof I had learned things in therapy—and the uncertainty that had filled my entire body when Cameron sought that kiss six months ago told me I couldn’t ignore it.
I just needed a little practice.
Time to warm up, if you will.
And the way I’d felt with Cameron, it hadn’t been warm.
It was hot. Burning. It had felt uncontrollable and frantic, heading straight toward something I just knew I wasn’t ready for, not after the last time I’d experienced a rush of emotions like that and the decisions I made from it.
It wasn’t the kiss that I’d been afraid of; it was what I knew the kiss would lead to with the chemistry flaring between us, undeniable and indescribable.
I needed to be responsible about dating. About what I exposed myself to. What I exposed Chloe to. I needed to be responsible about how I took care of myself when I finally had life going in a direction that I wanted it to, when I’d finally created something good for us—for Chloe and me.
So tonight’s date was as simple as that; it was just practice.
With someone safe, who caused no feelings of rampant desire or urges I couldn’t control.
Because Josh, my online date, had barely stopped talking.
He was explaining some kind of tech that his start-up was designing, a new socials app that he was sure would blow up.
He hadn’t asked me a question once. I found it hard to believe that he took a look at me and thought I didn’t have one interesting thing to say, but what did I know?
At the very least, he could ask about my job.
What trauma surgeon didn’t have a good story or two to tell?
Or my daughter. I personally thought my nine-year-old was the most interesting person on the planet.
I sighed, wishing Cameron would stop scrutinizing him. Even though that was exactly what I was doing, too.
So I stopped and looked at his date instead. She was a gorgeous woman with brown skin and a bright smile. Curly shoulder-length hair. A coral fitted dress that probably cost the same amount as one of my paychecks. Which was, well, a decent amount. Just saying.
Something hot turned in my stomach, and I internally chastised myself. I was not going to be jealous that he was on a date with another woman when one, he was my lawyer, and two, I’d been the one to reject him. That would be so very unreasonable of me.
“And then when my friend filed for the patent…”
I flicked my attention back to Josh, trying not to focus too hard on how poorly he’d arranged his tie. It might have been endearing if he had kids and his four-year-old had tied it, but as far as I knew, he was childless.
He kept talking. For so, so long. I’d finished my meal, and he’d still only taken a few bites of his, simply because he didn’t seem to want to pause his boring story long enough to put food in his mouth.
I tried, more than he was probably worth, to stay engaged with what he was saying and not focus on the heat that kept warming the side of my face, coming from where Cameron sat.
It felt like his eyes were on me, but that would be ridiculous, right?
For him to keep looking at me when he had his own date right there in front of him.
Picking up my gin and tonic, I took a long sip, hoping that maybe I’d find an escape from this situation at the bottom of it.
“Dr. London, it’s so nice to see you.”
I looked up in surprise to find that Cameron was standing beside our table. Right there. Next to me.
What was he doing?
I thought during our mutual once-over we’d also mutually, silently, decided not to acknowledge one another.
“You’re a doctor?” Josh said from across the table, coming to an abrupt halt in his story.
Thank God.
Cameron’s gaze turned sharp as he looked toward my date. His brows pulled together as if he couldn’t quite understand what was wrong with this man.
“Yes,” I said with the kind of patience I usually used on my daughter. “That’s why I said I worked in the emergency department at Suffolk County Medical Center.”
“I mean, yeah,” Josh said with a shrug. “I just didn’t know that meant you were a doctor. I assumed you were like a—”
“Do yourself a favor and don’t finish that sentence,” Cameron cut in.
“I’m a trauma surgeon,” I said kindly. Too kindly, I think. I watched Josh’s eyes grow wide before I turned to Cameron. “It’s nice to see you, too, Mr. Bryant.” And because I didn’t know what to say after that, I decided introductions were the best course of action. “Josh, this is my lawyer.”
For some inexplicable reason, Cameron’s jaw, which was covered with a light scruff I had the strange urge to run my fingers over, ticked.
This was going great.
So great that I could not have been happier to see the waitress approach our table, giving us all a distraction that we needed.
“Are we ready for the check?” she asked.
I nodded. “Yes, please.”
“Will that all be on one?”
“Two, please.” Josh held up two fingers. “But I’m happy to take the appetizer.”
The waitress could not have walked away faster.
Damn, I needed her.
“Ah, I thought this was a date,” Cameron said, his voice like a caress.
I hated that it made me feel things, that all he had to do was speak a few words to send my pulse haywire, when after listening to Josh for what felt like hours, I still felt nothing.
“Since it’s not, I’d love to steal Natalie away after dinner.
I have a few things I’d like to discuss. ”
Josh choked on air.
Finally, some speechlessness.
“Sure,” I said breathlessly, not really knowing what else to say.
I tried not to feel satisfaction that Cameron had put Josh in his place so effectively, but it was impossible.
And while I’d been kind to Josh, I didn’t feel kind enough to stick up for him.
Because while it had been a date, it had been a very bad one.
Cameron winked at me once before walking away.
And I tried very hard not to trail my gaze after him.
It took me another twenty minutes to escape Josh, and I assumed that by the time I exited the restaurant, Cameron would be long gone, considering I’d seen him leave with his date some time ago.
But the moment I walked out the door and turned to my left to start my trek home, I ran head-on into a wall of muscle. A suit-covered chest.
Two hands gripped my bare shoulders, steadying me and unraveling me all at the same time. Because a man was touching me. And I knew exactly who he was—the only man who had ever made me feel this way from a simple brush, a mere taste of skin-on-skin contact.
His breathy chuckle made me shiver, and I leaned into his warmth for just a second, until the sound of his voice, so very close and masculine and husky, made me jump away again.
“We seem to like the same restaurants and bars,” he commented, sounding thoughtful. “I’m surprised we haven’t had more run-ins over the last six months.”
I shook my head. He had no idea how many times I’d been tempted to go back to that pub, to see if he might still be there. Because while one part of my brain knew what I needed, the other part knew what I wanted.
“That would mean I’d have to go out more than twice in one year,” I said before finally looking up at him, just in time to see the sparkle in his eyes dim slightly at my words. “What are you doing?”
“Waiting for you. Wishing I’d just plucked you from that man before I walked away.” His features tensed. Was he impatient to leave? “I should have realized he’d try to hold you captive longer.”
“But what about your date?” I looked around for her, but Cameron was alone. “She was very pretty.”
Cameron looked over his shoulder in the direction that I assumed she’d left.
“She is.” His lips spread in an amused smile. “Probably because we share the same DNA.”
Oh.
Heat returned to my skin, and shit, he could probably tell. My cheeks felt it the most. But that was okay, as long as he didn’t realize that I was also, admittedly, relieved.
“She’s your—”
“Sister,” he finished for me. “You couldn’t tell? We have the same eyes, same nose, same complexion.”
I shrugged, feigning nonchalance. “She doesn’t have dimples.”
Cameron’s smile grew, his eyes glittering as he let the words sit between us.
“No,” he finally agreed. “She doesn’t have dimples.”
“Did you have a nice dinner?” I asked, wanting to push the conversation away from the fact that I was very aware of this man’s dimples.