Chapter 5
CHAPTER FIVE
cameron
AFTER A BUSY MONDAY morning full of meetings and prep work, I walked into my office to find Natalie London standing in it, staring at my bookshelves. Or, more specifically, at the pictures framed on it.
I had a few sitting there, scattered amongst textbooks.
A photo at my law school graduation with Julian’s arm slung around my shoulders, grins on our faces, my diploma in hand.
One of me with Beau and Collins at a Wednesday Elevett concert.
Another when I was about ten, at a baseball game with Pops, Dad, and Uncle Tony.
But the photo Natalie was staring at with a soft smile on her face was my favorite one.
I hadn’t been sure if she heard me come into the room, but then she glanced my way and asked, “Is that you?”
She nodded at the thirteen-year-old version of me, standing with my family on a beach.
“Sure is,” I murmured, coming to stand beside her.
I pointed at the young, curly-haired Collins whose face was scrunched next to mine in the picture.
“And that’s my sister, who you saw on Friday.
And my mom.” I moved my finger to the white woman with strawberry blonde hair and a smattering of freckles.
“And my dad,” I ended with, feeling that familiar deep ache in my chest as I brushed my fingertip over the tall Black man with my same brown eyes.
He wore a familiar blue ball cap, the one I still had, that was worn and fraying by now.
“You were such a cute kid,” Natalie said, the corners of her mouth upturned. “Where are you in this picture?”
“On Cape Cod,” I answered, feeling my throat tighten as I dropped my hand. “It was my mom’s birthday.”
I paused, and when Natalie didn’t say anything, seeming to wait to see if I had more I was going to add, I decided to keep talking. Because it felt good.
“When we were younger, my mom liked to make vision boards, collages. She and my sister have always had that sort of artist eye. Their crafts and projects could usually be found scattered throughout the house.
Anyway, Mom had made a board dedicated to places she wanted to go, and it included the vibes of a coastal New England escape.
So my dad recreated it for her birthday, surprising her with a weekend getaway.
We stayed in this tiny cottage by the beach, ate at quaint restaurants with Mom’s favorite foods, swam a lot.
The swimming was my favorite, but I also remember going to this little bookstore, where each of us picked out one book to read for the weekend. ”
I felt Natalie’s eyes shift to the side of my face, but I couldn’t tear my gaze away from the picture. “What book did you get?”
“The Lightning Thief,” I answered.
I still had the tattered copy of it.
“Chloe loves Percy Jackson,” Natalie said, delight in her voice at the mention of her daughter. “The new show is her absolute favorite.”
“A nine-year-old with good taste.” My chest warmed, and my lips twitched with a hint of a smile before sobering. “It’s the last picture of the four of us together before my dad passed.”
Natalie’s breath audibly hitched. “Oh, I’m so sorry, Cameron.” Her words punched me right in the gut with how genuine they seemed to be, like it truly broke her heart that the family in the picture didn’t quite exist anymore. “It’s such a lovely photo,” she added, her voice gentle.
“Thank you.” My throat was a little scratchy, and I cleared it before taking a step away from the bookshelf and forcing myself to sound casual. “But we’re not here today to talk about me.”
“I wouldn’t mind talking about you,” Natalie said, a threadbare laugh escaping through her lips.
I shook my head, knowing that was likely true. I was sure a part of her dreaded these conversations that all revolved around the one person she was trying to escape. I heard her heavy sigh as she followed me toward my desk. Rounding it, I sat in my chair, facing her.
“I just want to let you know before we get started that I’m on call today,” Natalie said as she sat down across from me, and I got a good look at her for the first time since she’d arrived.
And shit.
Somehow, I’d temporarily forgotten how goddamn gorgeous she was.
The thing about Natalie was that it all seemed so effortless.
She wore a simple white tee and jeans, her hair thrown up in her usual clip, but she radiated beauty.
And fuck if I wasn’t going to struggle to keep my shit together.
Even more than on Friday, when she’d been wearing that pretty pink dress, something she’d put on to go out with a guy who wasn’t fucking me.
“I apologize if I get pulled away,” she added. “I usually do shift work these days because it’s better for Chloe, but I still had this on-call on my calendar. And I tried to switch—”
“It’s okay, Natalie.” She didn’t need to justify herself this hard, not with me. “I don’t mind working around your schedule.”
“Thank you.” She gave a perfunctory nod. “I appreciate it.”
I sucked in a breath, trying to focus on anything that wasn’t how good she looked today. Every day. Always.
“Let’s start by chatting about Chloe,” I said, flashing a smile I hoped was reassuring. “Okay?”
Natalie nodded again, folding her hands in her lap.
She sat straight in her chair, her shoulders back, her chin held high.
Her guard was up today, almost like she was practicing for court.
And while I found Natalie’s strength and determination attractive as hell, I wish she didn’t think she needed to use it as a shield all the time.
“Why don’t you tell me a little more about her?”
Maybe talking about Chloe in a low-stakes way would help her relax a little.
“Well…” Natalie started, her lips pulling into an inward grin, something I doubted she realized she was doing.
“She’s really smart, and I’m not just saying that because I’m her mom.
” Natalie gave a light laugh before adding, “Her teacher tells me that she thinks Chloe gets bored quickly at school because the pace is a little slow for her, so they’re working on finding some enrichment to help with that. ”
“That’s not surprising,” I said with a smile, and Natalie gave me a funny look, like she couldn’t understand why I’d say that. So I added, “Her mom is a literal trauma surgeon. If she inherited your genes, I’m sure she’s brilliant.”
Natalie blushed and shook her head, not wanting to acknowledge the compliment.
And I quickly decided all I really wanted to do in life was feed Natalie London compliments like candy.
“Come on, Natalie. I might not have a medical background, but I know you’ve gotta be one of the youngest surgeons on staff. I know you’re older than Noah, but not by that much.”
“I’m thirty-two,” she admitted, her cheeks still pink.
“I…graduated high school with a lot of college credits under my belt already. Not a big deal.” She was a very big deal.
“Chloe loves to learn, too,” Natalie continued, doing a quick dive into talking about her daughter instead.
“I never thought she liked it when I talked about medicine or work, but apparently, Blake has been helping her memorize all the names of the bones. He’s a doctor, too, if you didn’t know. ”
I did know. I’d recently decided it was important to know everything I possibly could about the London family. For work purposes.
“Cardiologist, right?”
She nodded. “I’m sure he sprinkles in little heart facts along with the bones.”
“There are worse influences.” I leaned back in my chair, crossing one leg over the other. “What other things does Chloe like?”
“Animals. She loves them,” Natalie answered, and a look of warmth spread over her face.
“I think she gets that from my mom, who runs a pet rescue organization in the Twin Cities. And Noah adopted a puppy last summer, Winnie. Chloe’s absolutely obsessed with her.
” Her expression dimmed slightly as she added, “As you can probably tell, she spends a lot of time with adults, being an only child with no other kids her age in the family. Which I think is why she relates to adults a lot better than other kids. Sometimes she struggles with making new friends, and I blame myself for that. For not giving her more opportunities with her peers when she was younger. But I think being in figure skating has really helped.”
“Chloe seems very well loved and cared for,” I said, reassuring her. I suspected that Natalie put a lot of pressure on herself to be perfect at everything, including being a parent.
“Yeah.” There was a softness to her exterior now, her guard lower, not as noticeable. “She is.”
I took a deep breath, knowing we had to deepen the conversation, get into the bits that might be less comfortable for her.
“The judge will want to know why it will be in Chloe’s best interests for you to keep full custody,” I said. “So I think it’s important to consider your answer.”
A flash of emotion crossed Natalie’s face, but she stayed silent.
I let her think on it for another moment before encouraging her.
“You can just say what you’re feeling, Natalie.
We’re not in court yet. My job is to help you prepare for it, take your thoughts, and frame them into responses you can use. ”
“I have a lot of feelings,” she said with a shaky breath. “And thoughts.”
“Any parent in your shoes would, I’m sure.”
She crossed her arms over her chest and nibbled on her bottom lip. And since that caused a visceral reaction inside me at literally the most inopportune moment, I lowered my eyes to my computer screen, watching the blinking cursor as I waited for her to answer.
“Korey has never been a present father,” she finally said, and I lifted my gaze again. “Even when he lived with us. In some ways, I think with the visitation he has now, she sees him more and has a better experience than she ever did when we were together.”
“Can you explain that?”