Chapter 14 Cameron
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
cameron
SHIT.
I got so caught up in the moment with Natalie, with her admission that she wanted me to be the one to give her what she needed, that I lost track of time. I got off track. I didn’t use the last minutes before her deposition to ground her and encourage her, like a good attorney would have done.
No, I used it to tell her how good I would fuck her.
Great.
Excellent.
A clear goddamn example of why this wasn’t a good idea.
Yet I still couldn’t stop thinking about it, even as I settled in beside her at the conference table.
I couldn’t stop imagining what it might be like to be the one Natalie let in, the one Natalie trusted with her body and her desires.
To be the one she felt comfortable enough experimenting with.
I’d let her do anything to me. I’d give her anything she wanted, anything at all.
I’d be so good to her. So careful, so cautious, until she asked me not to be.
And then I’d give her fucking everything.
Not only did I hate thinking about her with other men, but I also couldn’t. I couldn’t imagine any other man giving her what I would, what I could.
Honestly, it should be me.
But that didn’t negate the fact that it really shouldn’t—all at the same time.
I sighed, feeling frustrated as I shifted in my seat. It probably had something to do with how close she was and how good she smelled, how her presence sort of wafted around me, invading every single breath I took, until it felt like I was slowly poisoning myself with want for her.
I looked at Natalie, who had lifted her chin, sitting tall.
Even though everything about her outward demeanor portrayed confidence and readiness, I could see the anxiety in her gaze, in the quick flick of her eyes as she looked from the camera to the court reporter next to her ex-husband’s lawyer, Mr. Keller, and then finally, to me.
You got this, Sunny.
Depositions were a big step in the discovery process.
There wasn’t a judge here, but this information would be provided to the judge, giving a lot of the necessary background for the case.
Depositions could be long and arduous and emotionally taxing for the client involved, but I had every faith that Natalie was going to do great.
Based on the look in her eye, I wasn’t so sure she had that faith right now, though.
I opened my mouth to reassure her before thinking better of it. Had he started the recording yet? I might have missed it when I momentarily got trapped in my own head, thinking about Natalie in contexts that had no place here in this room.
Pressing my lips together, I watched as Natalie drummed her fingers on the table, waiting for Korey’s lawyer to find the piece of paper he was looking for in the stack he’d brought with.
Her hand shook.
It was slight, likely imperceptible to most, but my brain seemed to automatically catalogue every small detail about Natalie London, which made it hard for me to ignore.
I couldn’t imagine that surgeons’ hands shook often.
Refusing to just sit there and let her be nervous on her own, I curved my palm over Natalie’s knee under the table, giving it an encouraging squeeze.
Her breath hitched as she focused forward again, but then she seemed to relax ever so slightly.
I didn’t trust myself to do anything else, not even a smile, not while other people were watching.
Noah had said something about looks, and that told me I hadn’t been hiding my emotions about Natalie as well as I should have.
I needed to work on that. Especially when we might be on camera.
Even this, the touch of my fingers on her bare skin where no one could see, was taking a gamble.
Especially when it reminded me of how much heat we could conduct between the two of us, like some kind of goddamn science experiment.
And that skirt? The one my fingers brushed as I found her warm skin?
God, she looked so fucking good in that tight skirt today.
Seeing her walk through the front doors of Gardner Law had been a punch to the gut, Gemma’s words on repeat in my mind.
You deserve to get laid, girl.
She did. By me, preferably.
No one fucking else.
I cleared my throat and started to pull my hand back, knowing I needed to keep it to myself, knowing that touching her right now was not going to help any bit of our situation.
But Natalie grabbed my hand beneath the table, staying it.
She put it back where it was and then placed her palm on top, smoothing my hand down so it gripped the inside of her knee.
Fuck me. She felt so warm, so welcoming.
I tried to keep the pressure of my grasp light, casual, but my heart pounded with a ferality that was anything but. I wanted to ease her trembles, sink my fingers into her flesh and become her anchor, stilling her in a storm.
That was what I did, after all.
Although Gardner Law was on the smaller side, it had enough breadth that it was able to provide specialized consultation in more than one area of law.
Family law was what I gravitated towards, though.
Families came to me with problems, and I went to battle for them.
I became the person they looked to when a part of their world crumbled.
And I liked doing it, liked the process, the learning, the fight, the outcomes.
It made me feel useful, like I had control in my fingertips.
I wanted to win for Natalie.
But more than that, I wanted to be a man she could count on—and not just because it was my job. I was fully aware that this was different from any other case or any other feeling I’d had about a client.
“Ms. London,” Korey’s lawyer started, and I already found myself tensing at how he addressed her.
“It’s—”
“Dr. London,” Natalie inserted, and I watched her rise into a different version of herself. The version that I knew was going to kick this deposition’s ass.
“Dr. London.” Korey’s lawyer made an unattractive grimace as he corrected himself. “Let’s get started, shall we?”
“Please,” Natalie said, flashing a forced smile as she folded her hands on the table in front of her.
I squeezed her thigh again and watched as the smile shifted.
Suddenly, it felt genuine.
Warm and sunny, like her.
Korey’s weaselly-ass lawyer asked Natalie questions for hours, and she handled every single one of them like a pro.
I had to cut in a few times to make sure he kept in fucking line, but overall, his lack of ability to rattle her filled me with so much goddamn pride, knowing how nervous she probably was on the inside.
Her confidence in her ability as a mother to care and provide for her daughter shone through in an undeniable way, and despite some of the things stacked against us, I had to believe that any judge would see how fit she was to maintain full custody.
We took a break halfway through, and it was only then that I removed my hand from Natalie’s leg.
She stood, went to use the bathroom, and returned a few minutes later, wearing a hard-to-read expression.
She’d put up those walls again, the ones Noah had mentioned.
And I couldn’t blame her, not after being poked and prodded in all the sensitive parts of her soul for the better part of today.
I gave her space, leaning on the armrest that was on the opposite side of my chair than where she sat.
I wasn’t sure if she’d want me to slip beneath the guard she’d put up while she was in the bathroom or if she needed it to stay intact to get through the rest of today.
I kept my palms firmly on my own knees. If she wanted my hand, it would be there, waiting for her.
It was hers to grab, the only part of me I could really offer her right now when we were sitting before a camera, before a man scrutinizing her—our—every action, word, inflection.
But I wanted her to take it if she needed it.
Natalie dropped back into her chair, pulling herself toward the table.
Her eyes darted to me. A flicker of a smile passed over her lips, but it vanished as soon as she trained her attention forward again.
She cleared her throat, and I thought that was the end of our brief interaction, but then I felt her.
Her fingers brushed against my pant leg first, like she was searching blindly and couldn’t quite find me beneath the table.
I widened the spread of my legs, pressing my knee against hers.
The contact was…disarming, to say the least. I suppressed a shudder, swallowing hard as I tried to maintain my expression, staring ahead at the camera, which luckily was still off.
Korey’s lawyer was looking at his phone when I felt Natalie’s fingertips brush my knee again.
I flexed my knuckles until our hands grazed, finding each other.
She hooked one finger with my middle one, giving it the tiniest tug, and I understood what she wanted.
How could I deny her when it was exactly what I wanted, too?
I’d never take touching Natalie for granted, not when it felt like a rare prize, when feeling her like this was forbidden, something that should be out of my grasp.
But she was very much within reach right now. I curved my palm over her knee again, sliding it back into the same place it had been before, finding her inner thigh.
Natalie’s muscles calmed. I could actually feel the way they loosened beneath my touch, and I tried not to think about what it could be like to do that to her entire body.
Fuck, I just knew I could make her feel so good.
The camera flicked on again, and I gritted my teeth.
The red light on the front of it blinked in our faces, taunting. Reminding.
Natalie cleared her throat, leaning forward with her elbows on the table. Korey’s lawyer gave her a once-over, as if to ascertain if she was ready to continue, but I didn’t like how he did it with his eyes. And I didn’t like the way they lingered. Actually, I fucking hated it.