Chapter 31
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
cameron
THE SENSATION I FELT in my chest when I looked down at my phone while at work and saw that Natalie was calling was undeniable.
I’d been counting down the hours, the minutes, the seconds until I saw her again. She was nothing short of incredible, brilliant, beautiful, and I couldn’t get enough. The night I’d brought her back to my place? Nothing short of mind-blowing. Even I hadn’t known sex could be like that.
And the baseball game? Taking Natalie and Chloe to Fenway left me feeling things that I was still processing. Walking out their front door at the end of the night after kissing Natalie had broken a small piece of me…and I think I left it there.
Today, my favorite single mom was supposed to come into the office to keep preparing for the trial, so this phone call was either her telling me that she was running late or early or—
“Cam, hi,” she said, her voice frantic from the moment I picked up the phone.
I sat forward in my chair, elbows on my desk.
“Natalie, what’s wrong?”
Her voice was half-muffled when she responded, like maybe she was trying to hold the phone to her ear with no hands. “I’m so sorry—fuck, goddamnit.” A clattering noise sounded in the background. “Sorry, I—”
“Don’t apologize,” I interrupted, feeling all my nerve endings tighten. Something was wrong. “Just tell me what’s going on.”
“I can’t come in today, I’m so sor—”
“Natalie.”
If she apologized one more time, I was going to lose it. If she thought I cared more about her keeping her appointment than why she couldn’t keep her appointment, I clearly had some things left to prove to her.
“There was an accident on I-93,” she said, and for some reason, I stood. As though I could do something about it while in the middle of Boston’s financial district. “A massive one. It’s all hands on deck at the hospital. I have to go in and—shit.”
Dread filled my entire being, taking me back to a moment when I was just a kid, hearing similar words.
“There was an accident. A bad accident, Cam.”
I swallowed hard, determined not to let my memories flood my present.
Right now, Natalie needed someone who was clearheaded because I could tell she wasn’t.
She sounded like she was trying to do twelve things at once, and while Natalie was the kind of woman who likely could figure out how to do twelve things at once, it wasn’t going too well for her at the moment, making me wish I were there to help.
“But you’re okay?” I clarified, my feet taking me back and forth across the length of my office.
“Yes, I’m fine.”
Relief trickled down my spine, nonsensical and silly.
Natalie was at home.
She wasn’t the one driving. Not the one in the accident.
“I just have to figure out about Chloe.” There was a jingle of keys and a slam of a door, and I tightened again, realizing that although she hadn’t been driving before, she was about to be.
“An incident like this might have a ripple effect across hospital networks, so I don’t think I should ask Blake and Delaney.
And Noah has mini camps this week, and Gemma’s already picking Chloe up from day camp and bringing her to skating afterward, but then Gemma has lessons after Chloe’s is done.
And she’s only just dipping her toes in after maternity leave, so I don’t want to put too much on her, but I guess—”
“Natalie, slow down.” I didn’t like the idea of her getting behind the wheel when her brain was running a mile a minute like this.
“I really don’t want to call Korey, but—”
“Do not call that man,” I interjected, firm. The last thing we needed to do was give Natalie’s ex any sort of fuel for his fire before the trial. I took a deep breath and softened my tone before going on. “Skating ends at six, right?”
A shuddering sigh left Natalie’s mouth, and, God, I wished I were there with her. “Right.”
“I’ll get Chloe from skating. I’ll bring her home, get her dinner, and stay with her as long as needed. Have you changed the code on the back door since I installed it?”
“No.”
Something burned in my chest.
“Good.”
“Cameron, I really appreciate this,” she started and then paused. A car door slammed, more light jingles, and then the dinging of a car with the key in the ignition. “But…”
I’d been waiting for that but.
Natalie didn’t accept favors without arguing about them first. But this wasn’t that for me. A favor. This was something else, something I couldn’t fully explain.
“Do you feel uncomfortable with me spending the evening with Chloe?” I asked.
“No, of course not. But—”
“Do you think Chloe would be uncomfortable with me alone at your house?”
Natalie snorted. “Are you kidding me? She’s probably going to demand you give her piggyback rides up and down the stairs. She’ll be ecstatic.”
“Then we’re not going to argue about it,” I said, once again firm. “I’ll take care of Chloe. You go to work, save lives, and get home when you can.”
An indistinguishable sound filtered through the speaker, and I stopped pacing, standing still in the middle of my office. My pulse thrummed, loud and insistent in my ear as I waited for Natalie to say something else, anything else.
But eventually, I couldn’t take it anymore.
“Sunshine?” I ventured. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah.” She released a shaky breath, her voice thick with an emotion I couldn’t place. “Yeah, I’m okay. Thank you, Cameron. I—I don’t even know what to say.”
“Don’t say anything. Can you just take a few deep breaths for me before you put the car in drive?”
“Mhm,” she hummed. “Yeah. Yeah, good idea.”
“Good girl,” I said when I heard her inhale, nodding with encouragement, even though I couldn’t see her and she couldn’t see me.
Maybe I should change that. I needed to change that.
“I wanna see you. Just for a sec, okay?”
Since we were on a time crunch, I didn’t wait for her response before I switched the call to video.
She could choose not to accept it if she wanted to.
But she didn’t do that, and within seconds, I had a visual of Natalie sitting in her car, looking as gorgeous as ever.
Her hair was pulled back, giving a clear view of her face.
Of the way she was biting her lip anxiously and wiping beneath her lash line.
Of her vibrant green eyes as they sought mine and her pinkened, pretty cheeks.
“Hey, baby.”
She flashed me a weak smile, but her gaze sparkled at the soft tone I used. At my words.
“Hi, Cam,” she whispered.
“You good?” I wouldn’t blame her if she wasn’t, not in a million years. Fuck, I wasn’t good right now, even if I’d pretend to be for her sake. I needed this moment just as badly. “Should we take another deep breath together?”
When she nodded, I nodded, and then she breathed in, and I breathed in, a feeling of syncopation, even though we weren’t even in the same room.
I wanted so badly to be in the same room.
I’d never longed to hold someone like this before. Never been this desperate to wrap my arms around another person’s shoulders or lift them into my arms. My hands itched to grab hers, and it killed me that I couldn’t.
“I’m good,” she said after a few moments of breathing, and I was so fucking relieved to hear that she sounded like she was good.
Natalie’s voice held steady, in control.
There was squareness in the way she looked at me now, like she was ready to face things head-on, ready to tackle whatever lay ahead of her.
And thank God for that. Because I couldn’t even begin to imagine what she might deal with today. “I’ve got this.”
“I know you do, Sunshine. You’re so fucking amazing and talented.” Her eyes rounded at the reassurance, letting it fill her. “Did you eat something before getting in the car? Hydrate?”
She nodded and picked up a half-eaten sandwich of some kind, a bag of some veggies, and a bottle of water to show me. It wasn’t much, but it was something.
“That’s my girl. Do you need me to bring you anything else? Chloe and I could deliver dinner later.”
“No, I’ve got more food in my bag. This is just for now.” She visibly swallowed before adding, “But thank you. I owe you.”
All I could do was shake my head.
If we had more time, I’d explain to her that there was nothing about this that was transactional. That I cared about her far more than I should, and I’d always be there if she or Chloe needed me. That there was very little she could do to keep me from being there for her or Chloe.
One day, she’d figure it out.
Well, one day, I’d make sure she figured it out.
But I knew I had to continue my course. Slow, steady, and dependable. That was all I could be and do right now.
“Drive safe for me, okay?” I said, and she nodded.
Even that little bit of reassurance from her made me feel better.
And yet, unease still swirled in my gut, the same feeling I always got whenever I saw accidents on the news or heard of fatal crashes that brought me back to the worst moments of my life.
“Could you…” I cleared my throat, realizing how hoarse I sounded.
“I know you’re about to be really busy, but can you please just text me when you get to work? ”
“I can do that,” she agreed, voice breathy.
Fifteen minutes later, I got a text from Natalie that she’d made it to SCMC.
And the tension in my stomach finally began to melt.
“Sorry, Champ. Not gonna happen. Those stairs were not built for piggyback rides.”
I chuckled at the image in front of me: Chloe with her hands on her hips, standing at the bottom of the narrow, hundred-year-old steps in Natalie’s townhouse.
“It’s just that my legs are so weak from skating all night. I don’t think I can make it to my room to change for dinner.”
Chloe pretended to wilt against the railing, even as the corner of her lips tweaked in a secret smile.
I told Chloe we could either order pizza or walk to the grocery store around the block to make homemade pizza. Surprisingly, she picked the latter. And then asked if we could also pick up root beer and ice cream while we were there, which I suspected explained the dinner decision.
But now, suddenly, her legs weren’t operating.
“Do I need to tell Gemma she’s working you too hard?” I asked, flashing her a look of pretend concern. “Call your mom and tell her your legs stopped moving?”
“No!” Chloe’s eyes grew wide as she straightened. “No, you know what? I think I’m good, actually.”
“Oh, thank goodness,” I laughed as I watched Chloe start bounding up the stairs. “I’d hate to stress your mom out any more than she already is.”
Chloe flew around the corner at the top of her stairs, disappearing into her bedroom, and I waited in the living room for her to change and come back down, tossing my briefcase on the couch.
I’d gone right from work to the rink, and to her credit, Gemma didn’t even bat an eye when I said I was there to pick Chloe up.
I suspected Natalie had told her, but if Gemma thought it was weird, she didn’t say anything.
She just smiled when Chloe popped off the bleacher and jumped to reach my high-five greeting.
This was the last thing I expected to be doing tonight, and I still had a pile of work waiting for me after Chloe went to bed, but I couldn’t imagine being anywhere else, doing anything else.
I could tell myself that I was here so that Natalie didn’t have to call Korey, so we could keep our upper hand in the custody trial, that by being here, I was helping my case at work. But all of that would be a lie.
I was here because I wanted to be here. I was here because having to leave after the baseball game the other night had twisted something in my chest, and not even just because I’d wanted to take Natalie to bed and return to my favorite place between her thighs.
I was here because nothing else really mattered if Natalie and Chloe weren’t safe and happy and cared for.
“Okay, ready!” Chloe announced as she bounced back down the stairs, wearing jean shorts and a shirt that read Back Bay Skating Star. She slipped on a pair of sandals before bounding out the front door without even waiting for me.
I would be lucky if I ever had as much energy as this child.
With a peek outside, I found Chloe sitting on the stoop, told her to stay there, and then locked up the house, exiting through the back before going to meet her in the front.
She popped up right away, flashing me with a bright, excited grin that dimmed a little as she went down each step toward the sidewalk.
I was about to ask what was wrong when she cocked her head to the side and looked at me. “You said Mom was stressed?”
The question caught me off guard; it had been a good ten minutes since I said that.
“It’s always a little stressful when things pop up unexpectedly, you know? Your mom has a big job to do and lives to save.” I studied her for a second before deciding to add, “One time, my parents were in a car accident, and someone just like your mom saved my mom’s life.”
My dad’s injuries might have been too extensive, but because of surgeons like Natalie, I still had my mom. And I was grateful for that every goddamn day.
I smiled reassuringly at Chloe, hoping to wipe the worry off her face while also being realistic. Chloe was old enough to understand some semblance of the truth. “Being a superhero is a lot of work, but your mom is really good at it.”
“Wow.” Chloe grinned at that, softer than usual, a tenderness in the gaze that matched her mother’s. “She is kind of like a superhero, isn’t she?”
“She sure is, Champ.”
“Maybe we should get her something at the store,” Chloe said, giving me a funny little side-eye. “Like flowers.”
“Flowers sound like a great idea,” I said, ignoring the curious way that Chloe was looking at me, like she was putting things together in her mind that I should really be dispelling. But I couldn’t turn down the idea of doing something for Natalie, not after the stress on her face earlier.
“Yeah?”
Chloe looked a little too excited about the idea of flowers, but I just nodded.
“Yeah, I think I have the perfect ones in mind.”
“Hey, Cam?”
“Chloe?”
“Is your mom okay now?”
My throat tightened. “My mom is great, kiddo. That was many years ago.”
“Oh, good.” Chloe surprised me, looking visibly relieved. “Should we get her flowers, too?”
I chuckled. “She lives in New York. But next time I visit her, I’ll be sure to bring her some flowers.”
Chloe gave an emphatic nod, as if she approved.
“Perfect.”
And that was exactly how it felt.