Chapter 5
Jonas
Iwas exhausted but pleased after our conversation. I also felt like an immature dumbass for letting things get to the point they did. But now it was like a heavy, guilt-laden weight had been lifted from my shoulders. Phoenix had forgiven me, and we were going to move forward. Friends again.
I’d have to shove aside my unrequited other feelings for Phoenix.
I would not make this awkward. Not when I had this chance to start over with him.
The ridiculous finger guns I’d made earlier flashed through my mind, and I groaned.
Finger guns were the very definition of awkward.
But it was fine. I supposed it didn’t really matter how awkward I was.
It wasn’t like I needed to impress him. We were friends; he’d seen me both bloody and puking over the years, and besides, he wasn’t a relationship kind of guy.
Brooklynn had shared plenty about his New York lifestyle with me, and I’d gleaned some of it myself from conversations we’d had before the pickle-tastrophe had caused me to nearly ruin over a decade of friendship.
“What’s the matter, dear?” Bronwyn asked as she passed behind me on her way to put the last of the dinner leftovers into the refrigerator. I assumed she’d heard my groan.
“Oh, I’m fine. Just full is all.” I shot her a smile.
“I’ll consider that a success,” she teased. Then she cleared her throat. “You seemed a bit quiet at dinner, though. Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Tired but good,” I confirmed. She nodded and, with a pat on my arm, left the room.
I grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and then headed upstairs.
Brooklynn, Amberly, and Phoenix had headed into town to grab a few things, and I’d opted to stay behind.
I really did want to give them some family time together and figured I’d use the time to unpack.
Grabbing my luggage from the hallway and toting it inside the bedroom, I stopped at the foot of the bed.
My suitcase dropped to the floor, and my duffel bag plopped down on my other side.
Butterflies kicked up in my stomach as I peered down at the fluffy green comforter.
I’d known there was only one bed, but I hadn’t fully thought that out when I’d agreed to the sleeping arrangement.
I chewed on my thumbnail as my brain went on an unhelpful tangent.
What if I ended up drooling on Phoenix? That was right up there with puke on the embarrassment scale.
I didn’t want to be unloading any more non-sexy bodily fluids on him.
Or what if I had a particularly vivid nightmare and drop-kicked him while fighting some evil dream ninjas?
I really didn’t want to sleep on the couch.
I didn’t want him to sleep on the couch either.
I wanted to be near him. It was as simple as that.
As ridiculous as it sounded to admit this, I hadn’t realized how much my avoiding Phoenix would hurt him.
We were close before, but at the same time, I didn’t think I’d really mattered that much to him.
I mean, my own sister loved me, but she’d always been happy for me to get out of her hair.
Why would Phoenix have been any different?
My assumptions had made a huge ass of me. I’d thought I had totally crossed the line with my drunken confession, not to mention the puking. I had selfishly been trying to avoid further humiliation, not considering how he’d been feeling on the other side of the chasm I’d forced between us.
And my infatuation was still alive and kicking. I was going to try my best to act like a normal human being around him, though. That would start right now. I’d unpack and then get ready for bed, like the thought of being in the same room as a naked Phoenix totally didn’t freak me out.
Before they returned, I slipped into the en suite bathroom to grab a shower and brush my teeth. I’d just stripped down to my boxers and climbed into bed when the door opened.
“Hey, Pickles. I’m gonna grab a quick shower, if the light won’t bother you,” Phoenix said.
“Of course,” I replied.
He strode toward the bathroom and then stopped and pivoted around. “We walked past The Parlor while we were out. Signboard out front said they brought back that banana ice cream you always loved. We should grab some while we’re here.”
“Oh! Nice. Okay, yeah. Let’s do that. Maybe we can all go after dinner sometime this week.
” The Parlor was this adorable little ice cream shop with the most delicious homemade desserts.
The banana ice cream reigned supreme forever and always, as far as I was concerned.
It had been a while since we’d all gone.
A dark eyebrow raised at my words. “Sure, but I meant just you and me.”
Well, that made sense. We had quite a bit of catching up to do. The intensity in his bright eyes heated my body to inferno temperatures beneath the covers. Or more likely, my mind was playing tricks on me because of my attraction to him. I’d need to get that under control—ASAP.
He turned and entered the bathroom, softly shutting the door behind him.
It opened again about ten minutes later, and out stepped Phoenix wearing nothing but a towel.
I tried hard not to stare. I really did…
for all of three seconds. I wouldn’t be surprised if he felt the burn of my gaze on his body as I tracked him around the room.
So much for acting normal. That was definitely not a friendly or brotherly reaction.
All the surrounding oxygen combusted when he stopped beside his side of the bed, turned away from me, and let his towel drop to the floor.
I got an eyeful of round, muscular ass cheeks, and the quickest glimpse of some sort of ink that wrapped around his trim waist and muscular thighs, before he slipped into bed and pulled the sheet up to his hips.
My awe-filled expression must have been written all over my face in permanent marker.
“I sleep nude…” Phoenix said slowly. “I did warn you.”
“Uh, no shit, Sherlock. I gathered that by the naked ass that just mooned me,” I teased. “Warning or no warning, you can’t miss it.”
Phoenix’s lips twisted into a smirk. As he looked over at me, the smirk softened into a smile. “When did you start wearing glasses again?”
I rubbed my tired eyes behind the lenses. “Few months ago. I have those contacts that you can sleep in, but they started irritating my eyes, so I don’t sleep in them anymore.”
“The glasses suit you. They always did.”
“Thanks.” I slid my hands under the sheet and removed my boxers.
I sometimes slept nude too, and when in Rome and all that.
I heard a low, slow exhale from his side of the bed as I tossed my boxers to the floor and then set my glasses on my nightstand.
I wasn’t sure what that was all about. Exhaustion, probably.
He reached over to his nightstand and flipped the light off.
“Goodnight, Jonas.”
“Night, Phoenix.”
Our first full day here, we didn’t actually go on any hikes other than just traipsing around the area near the house.
This was the first time Maddie was old enough to take in more of her surroundings, and Bronwyn, Brooklynn, Amberly, and I spent a good chunk of the day walking around the property, letting Maddie soak in all the sights, sounds, and scents.
She stuck her face into almost every flower she could reach, sneezing once or twice but otherwise smiling widely, delighted by their sweet fragrances and soft petals.
Ever the curious toddler, she attempted to grab a bee that was hovering near a yellow lily but James scooped her up before any stings happened, gently spinning around with her in his arms. The wind in her face won out over any upset she had about not being able to touch the “buzz buzz.”
It was a nice calm day that turned into a relaxing evening.
Phoenix and James had a respectable blaze going in the backyard fire pit.
Garrett had one of those roasters going over the fire that cooked eight hot dogs at once, and Bronwyn had a feast of leftovers laid out nearby on the wooden picnic table.
By nightfall, we were all stuffed and lounging around the fire.
Smack! I whacked at my arm and squashed the mosquito that tried to have me for dinner. A moment later, one flew across my face and landed on my neck, followed by another on my leg. Smack! Smack!
“Great,” I muttered. “You’re coming out in droves to avenge your little blood-sucking friend, huh? Well, I’m sorry but I need all of my blood, thank you very much. Go find something non-human to sink your nasty needle things into.”
One went for my ear and—flick!—two fingers knocked it away before I could.
Phoenix set a massive lit citronella candle on the tree-stump table beside me, followed by one of those devices that emit some sort of electronic pulse that mosquitoes supposedly hate.
He dragged the chair beside me closer and plopped into it.
His handsome face held a wide grin that was made all the brighter by the flames.
“You must be pretty damn tasty,” he teased. The firelight danced in his eyes, drawing me in and holding my attention. “I was gonna have a s’more, but maybe I’ll just nibble on you instead.”
Did he just say…
My head whipped around to see if anyone else might have heard, but Amberly had just made her way inside to put Maddie to bed, Bronwyn and Garrett were over by the picnic table gathering empty dishes to lug back inside, and Brooklynn and James were sitting on the other side of the fire, chatting.
I laughed, and it came out all stuttered and high-pitched. “Well, if you’re feeling a little anemic, I’m your O-positive man.” Ugh, I did not just say that. I pressed my thumbs against my temples and rubbed, sinking down into my chair and wishing I could completely disappear.