Chapter 9
Jonas
After getting cleaned up, we came face-to-face with Brooklynn as we passed through the dining room again. I glanced around, searching for Marcus and expecting him to be nearby.
“He left,” Brooklynn said.
“Bummer,” Phoenix deadpanned.
I gave him a look and then turned to Brooklynn.
“Did he say why he left? I know we took a bit longer than expected, but I was going to ask him those questions for my article. He’d also mentioned wanting to get my opinion on some apartments in Raleigh.
He’s moving there at the end of the summer. It’s odd that he’d just up and leave.”
“Something about a hike tomorrow that he needed to prepare for.” She cleared her throat lightly. “If you ask me though, I’d say he was fairly put out by his loss this afternoon.”
I stared at the two of them silently for a moment, blinking. The smirk on Phoenix’s face was aggravating. “What do you mean by that?” I asked her.
Brooklynn gave me a one-armed hug and stepped back again.
“First of all, sweetie pie, best friend of mine—and don’t blame Phoenix, because he didn’t blab—I know that you and my brother are messing around in some way, shape, or form.
” She held a palm up when I opened my mouth to interject.
“Please, spare me the details. You two were sickeningly sweet at the top of the hill today—yes, I was totally eavesdropping a bit. But I already warned Phoenix that he may lose me in the divorce if he hurts you.” She glared at her brother, perhaps to reiterate her message.
My lips pressed into a thin line, and I nodded. I had a feeling she’d known something was up.
“Second of all, Marcus, bless his heart, has a massive thing for you, which you seem to be oblivious to, and he’s been trying to get your attention since he popped up at the end of the lane this morning. I suspect that’s why he’s so eager to talk about hiking with you for your article.”
“What?” I exclaimed. “No way! He’s been friendly, yeah, but you’re reading into things. He’s just a nice guy.” I glanced at Phoenix, and his jaw was set tight. He clearly agreed with her. “You’re both reading into things.”
“Come on, Pickles,” Phoenix said. “Did you not notice how he conveniently asked for another helping of mac and cheese before he’d even eaten the previous one, once he realized it meant Ma would come over and might have seen…” He gestured toward my dick. “You know.”
“Okaaaay,” I said, dragging out the word. “So, he’s a big fan of Bronwyn’s cooking. But who isn’t? That doesn’t mean he was trying to interfere—”
“It does, Jonas.”
First, the bug bites, and now these two were insinuating that I was too naive to understand Marcus’s real intentions.
This afternoon was turning into a real shitshow.
I turned the full force of my irritation toward Phoenix.
Anxiety swirled in the pit of my stomach. I hated confrontation with a passion.
“Is that why you wanted to detour into the garage when you did? To make Marcus jealous and piss him off?” I was so daft sometimes. “Tell me the truth,” I demanded. The guilty expression written all over Phoenix’s face was proof enough.
“I’d been wanting to do that all day anyway, Jonas,” he said quietly.
He reached toward me, but I pulled away abruptly.
I’d probably just been feeding his ego, and I was an idiot.
I should have known it was just another case of “Wham. Bam. Thank you, man,” for him.
I’d heard all about his dicktivities in NYC from Brooklynn.
I knew how he was. Phoenix and I hadn’t even talked about what this was or where it was going.
I’d been so caught up in the fact that my long-time crush was into me that I’d neglected to take his past into consideration before jumping into the sack with him.
“Damn it,” I muttered under my breath.
Brooklynn wrapped a hand around my forearm and brushed her thumb over my skin. “Jonas, I’m not sure that we’re all coming to the same conclusions about everyone’s activities and motives right now. Let’s grab a triple-layer cookie snack and talk through this.”
“I think I’m going to go lie down for a while instead.
Alone,” I clarified specifically for Phoenix.
I really wasn’t sure what to think right now.
“Then I’m going to call Marcus and apologize for whatever the hell weirdness happened today, and see if he’ll still let me interview him over the phone and talk about apartment options.
” Brooklynn’s lips turned down in a frown, and the rest of her expression fell along with it.
“For Marcus, not for me,” I told her. “I love you. I just need some quiet time to digest—” I motioned in a circle in the air between the three of us—“all this. We can have snack-o’clock later, okay? ”
“Okay, babe,” she said softly.
“Jonas, come on,” Phoenix sputtered, running his hands through his hair.
“I don’t understand what you’re so upset about right now.
Am I a jealous, competitive dick sometimes?
” He shrugged. “Yes. But you need to talk to me and tell me what you’re thinking.
This isn’t high school. We’re adults. Let’s talk. ”
“I just need some time to think, Phoenix.”
His brows knitted together, and he crossed his arms tightly. At the stubborn look on my face, his arms dropped to his sides, and his shoulders slumped. A twinge of guilt hit me in the chest, but I shoved it aside.
“Okay,” he said. “I can give you that. Just remember what you said. Don’t bail on me now, please.” He kissed my forehead as he walked past and left the room. Brooklynn patted my arm and trailed out after him, giving me the peace and quiet I’d asked for.
I wandered to the bedroom and flopped backward onto the bed. Phoenix’s words had hit me in the gut in a way he probably hadn’t even intended them to.
We’re adults. Let’s talk.
We were both technically adults, yes. But Phoenix was a real adult—someone who owned his own business, made good money, and had other real adult friends.
I was…not. Hell, Brooklynn and I still relied on our childhood snack routine when we needed a pick-me-up.
Today’s shitshow aside, I was beginning to realize just how different my world was compared to Phoenix’s world.
We were at two very different points in life.
I worked at a bar and wrote articles on the side for paltry amounts of money.
I’d come here to focus on one of those articles and have some fun, and instead, I was overwhelmed and in over my head with Phoenix in only a few days.
I’d been attracted to him for so long that I think I ended up putting him on some sort of pedestal.
That wasn’t fair to him, nor to me. I didn’t want to hurt him if he did have some sort of real feelings for me, but I didn’t want to get hurt either.
And it was looking like either way, one of us was going to end up feeling the pain from this vacation.
Probably just me. After all, I’d ended up with bug bites and heartache, but at least I hadn’t tripped and fallen off the edge of a mountain and plummeted to my death.
Small wins.
That would probably be my only win from this trip. It didn’t feel like much of a win at all, though. I supposed I deserved it, really. Karma.
Brooklynn sat on the bed in the green bedroom as I packed my things into my duffel bag and suitcase. She picked up the T-shirt I’d just thrown in, folded it for me, and laid it back in nicely.
“I’m sad that you’re leaving.” She was clearly as unhappy as I was about my decision.
Last night, Phoenix had slept on the couch in the family room without prompting, part of the whole giving me space thing.
The whole situation was confusing and annoying.
He’d gone from crush to lover to ex all in the span of three days.
That was not normal. I brought a big bag of chaos with me everywhere I went.
Someday, Phoenix would probably look back on this experience and be thankful he’d been given an out by way of my indecision and stupid insecurities.
“I don’t really want to leave either, but…
” I shrugged. “To put it bluntly, this was an ill-timed vacation fling. That’s what he does.
He flings people.” My words made no sense, but they matched the jumble of confusion that was my brain.
“You told me that yourself. I’m trying to get out before either of us gets hurt any more than we already have. ”
“Is that your concern then?” Brooklynn pulled my suitcase toward her and started refolding the clean clothes I hadn’t even worn yet. “That he sees you as a fling and not a potential relationship? Which is a totally valid concern, if that’s how you feel. I’m just trying to put the pieces together.”
“Yes, that and the fact that I’m in a very different place than him from a personal life and career perspective. Let’s say we did get serious. How would that even work? He lives in New York City. I live in Raleigh. The distance does not math out in our favor.”
She groaned and lay back against the pillows. I was going to suggest she move over a foot or so, but thought better of it. This was probably already awkward enough, with things involving her best friend and brother.
I crawled up on the bed and lay my head down beside hers, so we were facing each other.
She blew out a puff of air, then spoke. “I’m just really frustrated right now that Phoenix went balls to the wall on this path with you, and now things have gone south.
I’m sad for you both, but he’s had a thing for you since our college graduation.
” A small smile crept up, and she shook her head.
“Talk about being daft. He thought he’d kept it well hidden. ”
Balls to the wall?
“What?” I asked. Obviously, I knew the expression, but in terms of Phoenix and me, I wasn’t quite sure what she meant.
“Oh yeah. He thinks he’s good at keeping things hidden, but my bullshit detector is stronger.”
I didn’t know how to unpack that, so I sat up and just finished packing my suitcase. Brooklynn walked with me outside. When we got to her vehicle, she handed me the keys rather than getting in herself.
I shoved them back at her. “I can’t drive your car to the rental place. I’d have to leave it there, and there’s no way in hell that’s going to happen.”
She shook her head and shoved the keys at me again. “Just take my car home. You’ll get there faster.”
“I must be really pathetic right now if you’re trusting me with your baby.”
She rolled her eyes and pushed me toward the driver’s side. “Get going so you make it home before the roads get too crowded.” I nodded and got in. She leaned against the open door frame and cleared her throat. “Did you at least tell Phoenix you were leaving?”
I stared at my hands as I gripped the steering wheel.
“I did.”