Chapter 14
A toxic mixture of anxiety, fear, and a healthy dose of disgust roiled through Jamal’s gut as they made their way to the Aztec Ballroom of the Biltmore Hotel, where his sister’s wedding and reception were being held.
With each step he took, he had to talk himself out of turning around and driving back to Sedona.
He knew it was out of the question. He’d come here for Lauryn. He was not going to ruin her big day. He and Lawrence Johnson would just have to suck it up and tolerate each other’s presence.
Jamal glanced over at Phylicia, who had an excellent chance of outshining the bride. She was stunning in the formfitting strapless gray dress. Her subtle makeup transformed her face into a thing of breath-stealing beauty. He could spend hours staring at her.
“Stop staring at me like that,” she said in a hushed voice.
“I can’t help it. You’re just so damn good to stare at.”
The blush that blossomed on her cheeks made looking at her even more enjoyable. He loved making her blush. He’d figured out so many ways to do it over the past few months.
“Are you ready for this?” she asked.
Her inquiry doused his heated thoughts. Sucking in a heavy breath, he answered, “As ready as I’ll ever be.”
As soon as they entered the elegant ballroom, Jamal heard a sharp gasp. He turned and, a second later, was enveloped in a set of warm, familiar arms.
“Oh, Jamal,” his mother cried. She grabbed his face and kissed both of his cheeks.
“Don’t cry. You’ll ruin your makeup,” he teased. It was either make jokes or bawl along with her. God, how he’d missed this woman. “It’s great to see you, Mom.”
She cradled his cheek in her palm. “Oh, you too, darling. I’ve missed you so much. It isn’t the same with you being away.”
Jamal took her hand and kissed the back of her fingers. He turned to Phylicia, who’d stood a few feet back. The emotion on her face nearly did Jamal in. He realized that she could no longer have moments like this with her mother.
In that instant, the anxiety over returning to Arizona withered and died. He was blessed with a healthy, vibrant mother who meant the world to him, and he’d purposely stayed away because of his father? How selfish—how foolish—could he be? He was never staying away this long again.
He turned to Phylicia. “Mother, this is my date, Phylicia Phillips. Phylicia, my mother, Katherine Johnson.”
“It’s so nice to meet you,” Phylicia said, taking her hand. “And this place is absolutely beautiful.”
“So are you,” his mother returned, her eyes widening with unconcealed curiosity. “How did you two meet?”
“You remember Corey Anderson, my old roommate at Arizona State?” Jamal asked. “He and Phylicia went to high school together. She’s a restoration specialist in Louisiana. She’s helping me to restore the home that I’m turning into a bed-and-breakfast.”
“Oh, what fascinating work. You and Jamal must have so much in common. I’m guessing you’ve been spending a lot of time together?” Her voice was so hopeful that Jamal had to bite back a laugh.
“Um…yes, we have,” Phylicia said, her eyes darting his way, sparkling with amusement. “Your son has very unique ideas when it comes to design.”
“He’s a brilliant architect, and a great provider. He can play the saxophone, too. And I just know he’s going to be a wonderful father someday. He just needs to find the right woman.”
Oh, great. Way to be subtle, Mom. He wouldn’t be surprised if she pulled out a résumé listing his husbandly qualities.
Glancing around the room, Jamal spotted his father heading toward them. His jaw stiffened.
“I’m going to find Lauryn and say hello before the ceremony begins,” he said. “Phylicia, I’ll only be a few minutes.”
Covering his forearm with her gloved hand, his mother looked at him with mournful eyes. “Jamal, talk to him,” she said.
The pleading in her voice clawed at his soul, but as he took in the arrogant, haughty look on his father’s face, he knew that any confrontation between them right now would make his sister’s wedding a spectacle instead of the magical day she deserved.
He kissed his mother’s cheek and turned, heading for the opposite side of the vast ballroom.
By the time he found the suite where his sister and her bridesmaids were getting dressed, Jamal had only a few moments to talk to her. After being away for over a year, it wasn’t nearly long enough.
By the time he returned to Phylicia, the ceremony was beginning.
As the night wore on, it became evident that he and his father were on the same page when it came to getting through the evening.
They put equal amounts of effort into avoiding each other.
Even during the family photos, when they stood mere feet from one another, not a single word was spoken between them.
That was just fine with Jamal—until he noticed the sadness in his mother’s eyes. The sorrow evident on her face hit him square in the chest.
“Are you okay?” Phylicia asked as he rejoined her at their table.
Jamal reached for her hand and brought it to his lips. “I’m good,” he said. “Especially with you here with me.”
The lead singer of the live band that had covered songs from the nineties announced that it was time for the traditional bride-and-groom dance, but instead of going to the center of the ballroom, his sister headed for the stage and gestured for the microphone.
“Hello again, everyone,” Lauryn started, that smile she’d been wearing all night as bright as ever.
“I hope you all are enjoying yourselves and adding up a huge tab at the bar, since my dad is paying for it all.” Laughter flittered around the room.
“Michael and I had picked out a song for this dance, but at the time I didn’t know if my big brother, Jamal, would be here.
” She looked directly at him, her brown eyes, so much like his, softening.
“Since he is, I would be so honored if our wedding song came from his saxophone. Jamal, will you play for us?”
Without hesitation, Jamal set his drink on the table and made his way to the stage.
“You know that I usually don’t play another person’s sax,” he told his sister. “But for you, I’ll make an exception.”
Lauryn beamed. She stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek. “Thank you, big brother. You shouldn’t even have to ask which song,” she said.
Jamal glanced over at the sheet music on the stand and let out a sharp crack of laughter. “I should have guessed,” he said.
He positioned his fingers on the keys, getting a feel for the unfamiliar sax. Moments later, he started playing Boyz II Men’s “On Bended Knee.” For an entire summer, the song could be heard coming from his sister’s bedroom twenty-four seven.
As he serenaded the couple, his eyes found Phylicia. She sat with her elbow propped up on the table, chin in her hand. A wistful smile graced her lips.
Jamal was suddenly struck with a sense of déjà vu.
It was in an atmosphere like this one that he’d first started to fall for her.
He hadn’t even known her all that well at Mya and Corey’s wedding, yet he’d been drawn to her.
Later that night, as they’d talked about every insignificant thing under the moon, he’d realized that she was the type of woman he could easily see himself spending the rest of his life with.
He blew out the last few notes of the song, shrugging off the bevy of applause from the audience with a modest wave. He leaned over and whispered something to the band leader before walking over to Lauryn and his new brother-in-law. He enveloped them both in a hug and kissed his sister’s cheek.
God, she looked happy. He could only hope to find such happiness one day.
With that thought in mind, Jamal headed straight for Phylicia.
“That was lovely,” she said.
“Thank you,” he answered. He held his hand out. “This next dance is for us.”
She tilted her head to the side, her brows raised in question. As the song he’d requested started, a slow smile spread across her face. She captured his hand and allowed him to guide her onto the dance floor. Phylicia rested her cheek against his shoulder as they swayed back and forth.
“This is the song that played for the bridal party dance at Mya and Corey’s wedding,” she said.
Jamal nodded. “It was the first song we ever danced to.”
“I can’t believe you remembered that,” she said.
“That song played in my head for days after the wedding. I couldn’t get it out of my mind.” He pulled slightly away and peered down at her. “You really don’t have a clue how much you affected me that night, do you? I fell for you. Hard. And I’ve been falling ever since.”
She stared up at him, her eyes filled with the same emotion that was tightening his chest. “I’m falling too,” she admitted in a soft voice. “I’m not sure I can fall much deeper.”
The air between them vibrated with an intense energy. It was as if everyone else had disappeared, leaving the two of them to savor this experience in their own private universe. This song, this place, this moment—it was just for them.
“I’m in love with you,” Jamal said. He hadn’t meant to say it; the words came out involuntarily. But now that he’d put them out there, he wouldn’t take them back.
Phylicia just stared at him, her expression unreadable.
Something close to panic clawed up Jamal’s throat. It was too soon. She was good and spooked; he could feel it in the way her body stiffened against him.
She dropped her gaze to his chest. “If I tell you the same thing, you have to promise you won’t hurt me,” she whispered, her soft voice saturated with uncertainty.
“I told you before that I would never hurt you, Phylicia.” He captured her chin between his fingers and lifted her gaze to meet his. “I’m not Kevin. Don’t make me pay for his mistakes.”
“No, you’re not Kevin,” she agreed. “I know you would never hurt me the way he did.”
The song ended, but Jamal didn’t move. He refused to leave this spot until he knew how she truly felt about him.