Chapter Five
Eddie
I’ve always wanted to kiss Lawliss and be with her in a way that felt too impossible. I knew the moment something happened between us, there was no going back. And I was right. The moment my lips met hers, I felt whole, and every demon I’ve been fighting stilled. I felt at peace with her in my arms.
I fucking laughed I’m no longer the guy that lets out a belly laugh or smile brightly but all I’ve done since meeting her this evening is be someone I barely recognize. My grandparents would have a field day should they see me now.
Years of keeping my distance and of telling myself that she couldn’t be mine just crumbled in an instant. I’d tried to keep my distance after moving and even when we were together, I tried being the big brother figure they needed—she needed to keep me from crossing the line. I wasn’t sure how she felt about me, nor was I sure how it was going to span out but damn, the second she looked at me with those hazel eyes, everything I’d tried to bury resurfaced.
Now she’s sitting on my lap just like she used to, except this time the electric pulling us together is stronger and her warmth seeps into me. I’m transfixed, trying to blend the past with the present. The way her body keeps moving against mine, Damn! I can barely breathe. Lynx hasn’t changed much. Same fire in her eyes, the same way of deflecting when things get too heavy. There’s something different about her now though she still carries the same confidence. There’s a sadness in her that wasn’t there before.
And she’s divorced.
Hearing her say it hit harder than I thought it would. A part of me feels guilty for not staying in touch and for leaving without a proper goodbye all those years ago. Another part of me wants to kick the bastard who cheated on her, which I definitely will. No one messes with what’s mine and goes away scot-free. By virtue of being divorced, she’s mine whether she likes it or not. In fact, she’s always been mine.
I loosen my grip on her waist, though my fingers itch to keep her close. I can’t stop myself from looking at her ring finger again. Empty. Which gives me a new meaning and purpose.
I should say something; apologize for disappearing, for not being there for her. But I don’t know if she even wants to hear it. The truth is, I’ve been keeping tabs on her, more than I’d like to admit.
“You didn’t answer my question, Ed.”
Her lips brush against mine, and I swear, for a second, time stops. I can feel her pulse racing under my fingers, the warmth of her breath mixing with mine.
Then she pulls back and the silence between us thickens. I try to act casual, but who am I kidding? Nothing about this feels casual.
“Why didn’t you leave?” she asks and I can’t meet her eyes. I can feel her waiting for an answer, but I know that whatever I say won’t be enough. Not after all this time.
How do I explain to her that I left because she was better off without me? She still is, except I don’t really mind now. Do I say that it was easier to stay away and deal with everything than to be close to her? How much can I reveal?
I run a hand through my hair, glancing out at the night sky, trying to find the words. But they get caught in my throat, stuck between regret and desire. This is Lynx, my Lynx , and she’s sitting right here, so close I can smell her perfume mixed with the scent of rain from the rooftop. But she’s also someone who I’ve already lost once, and I don’t know if I can handle losing her again.
“My life was in danger.” I finally settle on that and she sucks in her breath.
“But I’m fine now. I moved to London to stay with my maternal grandparents,” I add.
“is… is …”
“No… let’s not talk about that. let’s talk about what I can do to take your mind off the divorce.” Before she can protest, I add, “From what I know about you, you being here means one or two things. Either this place is part of a list you created five years ago because you never followed through with your personal list or your sisters instigated you to do something crazy, so which is it?”
“The second one,” she says, standing from my lap and I immediately feel the loss.
“I’m here to make a bold and reckless decision,” she says with a forced laugh.
“You don’t say.” I stand as well, then walk towards her. She turns to look at me and the way her eyes sparkle with mischief tells me I will not like what she’s going to say but I can’t deny her either. Reaching her, I turn my head to the left, take her right hand, and sigh.
“What do you have in mind? I’m all ears,” she smiles brightly, too brightly with our faces just inches apart. She licks her lips and then wraps her arms around me, pulling me closer. Without warning, she grabs my other hand, her fingers curling around mine with a firm but playful tug, guiding me back toward the couch.
“So, I haven’t really been living for the past months before the divorce,” she sits beside me, her fingers drifting into my hair. I don’t know if I should like where this is going or hate it because I’m on the verge of losing it and I think she knows what she’s doing to me.
“I was thinking… This is the best opportunity for me to live. Have a one-night stand and who better than you?”
“Lynx–” I growl, she knows what she’s doing.
“Let me finish. We won’t meet again because you probably live here, in London, or maybe not? Where do you live? Don’t answer; the mystery makes it better. So as I was saying, you no longer live in Louisville. You haven’t been there in years and you wouldn't.”
“How can you be so sure I wouldn’t be going back?”
“Because you would have already." She is wrong but I don’t correct her. “You are drunk,” I say instead.
“Oh, just two glasses of Margarita isn’t going to get me drunk. Moreover, if you don’t agree, I’m going to get someone else to agree to it tonight either way.”
“Jeez, is that your planned impulsive decision?” I ask because if that’s it, then there’s no stopping her. She nods and I sigh.
I want her more than anything but for me to have her, I will have to make her mine completely. I’ve been preparing for this day but I didn’t dare to think it could become a reality so if it is, then who am I? I’ve always been selfish toward everyone except her but maybe it’s time I extended it to her.
“Before the divorce…” she continues, breaking my train of thought “Before I caught him cheating on me, we had not been sexually active for months. If I don’t do something about it, I will continue to think about him and feel something is wrong with me. If I’m being honest, currently I feel so undesirable.”
I lean in, brushing her lips with mine, so close I can feel her breath against me. There’s no way I’m letting some asshole make her feel undesirable. And there’s no way I’m doing this without a stamp that says she is mine.
“How about before we do what you’re asking?” I murmur, my voice low, “you sign a few documents for me? Without reading them.”
She raises a brow, the hint of a smile playing at her lips. “You want my properties, Ed?” she asks, amused.
I chuckle, though my heart is pounding in my chest. She’s too close, and I know she can feel it. “No, Empress. I have enough to last a lifetime. But let’s add this to your list of reckless decisions for the night.”
Her eyes narrow, playful but questioning. “You know I could just find another guy to do this, right?”
“Maybe,” I say, holding her gaze, letting a dangerous smile slip through. “But I promise you, that man wouldn’t live to tell the tale.”
She rolls her eyes, but there’s a spark of mischief there. “Fine, bring whatever document you want me to sign.”
I don’t waste a second. Keeping my voice steady, I send a quick text to Josh, asking him to bring the prepared documents from my car to the rooftop.
I travel with them wherever I go. These weren’t random papers. I’d been renewing and updating them for years, like some insane dream I never thought would come true. And now, here she is, sitting inches away, asking me to indulge her in one reckless decision. I can barely breathe.
Minutes later, Josh appears, glancing between the two of us with raised brows. He knows what the document contains but even he seems taken aback by my sudden request.
I meet his eyes, giving him a silent nod. “Thanks, Josh,” I say quietly, keeping my tone casual, though I feel anything but.
He hesitates, the documents clutched in his hand. “Are you sure about this?” he asks under his breath, eyeing me with an intensity that suggests he knows exactly what I’m planning but not why.
“Just file them immediately,” I say, keeping my voice steady and low. My grip tightens on the papers as I hand them to Lawliss, who’s watching with a slight smirk, still assuming this is part of the game. She doesn’t even glance at the papers as she takes them, signing her name with a flourish and a laugh, like we’re in on some secret joke.
I watch her, my heart pounding, barely able to believe what just happened. I turn and hand the papers back to Josh, who gives me a look—one that says you’ve finally lost it—before disappearing down the stairs.
Lawliss lets out a soft sigh, leaning back slightly, her gaze steady on mine. “Now that the reckless decision is done,” she says, her voice low and daring, “let’s see what else you’ve got in mind, Ed.”
Her fingers toy with the edge of the glass, which contains the remaining drink. Her lips curve into a faint, almost teasing smile. There’s a challenge in her eyes, a spark that pulls me in, daring me to close the distance.
I can’t hold back anymore. The moment stretches between us, heavy and electric, until finally, I lean forward, my eyes never leaving hers. And before I can second-guess myself, I close the distance between us, crashing my mouth onto hers. The kiss is fierce and possessive, fueled by every pent-up emotion I’ve tried to bury. Her breath hitches against my lips, but she doesn’t pull back. Instead, she melts into me, her hands finding their way to the back of my neck, and then they move up, tangling in my hair.
With my lips barely leaving hers, I guide her backward, my hand firm on her waist, steering her through the rooftop shadows. Thankfully, I know every inch of this place by heart—every hidden passage and private retreat.
We move together, caught in the slow burn of the kiss, her body molding against mine as I lead her toward a discreet door tucked behind a wall. With a quick swipe of my key card, I nudge her into a small, mirrored elevator.
The elevator doors close, enclosing us in a space so small that the world outside seems to disappear. I use my hands to cup her face, my mouth claiming hers with a kind of hunger I’ve kept buried for too long. The ride is quick, but it stretches endlessly in the hazy, electric pull between us.
We arrive in front of a door. Breaking the kiss, I swipe my card again, and a soft chime sounds. The doors slide open to reveal a dimly lit penthouse suite, a place of velvet sofas, crystal decanters, and walls of tinted glass that offer an even more breathtaking view of the city below. The room is perfectly isolated from everything else.
I pull her into the suite, barely pausing to close the door before I press her back against it, deepening the kiss with a passion that has nowhere left to hide.