2. Jaxon
One Year Ago
The sticky summer air clung to my skin as I pushed myself to run harder, faster. I needed to be the best; I had to be for them to choose me since I’m so late in the game. I had to prove that I was worthy before it was too late.
The Georgia sun beat down my face. Sweat rolled down my face and along my neck until it reached the hem of the shirt I was wearing. I’d regretted wearing it the moment I stepped outside. But I had to protect my skin. I spent enough time in the sun to know the harm it could cause.
Tonight was my last chance to get recruited. The rosters were full for most of the bigger teams, but Coach had promised me the recruiters would be there tonight. He swore I had potential. ‘Natural talent,’ he called it.
God, I hoped he was right.
I wanted this.
I could taste it.
I just had to be the best.
Running along the trail, I spotted my best friend waiting for me, leaning against a tree trunk. A baseball cap covered his head, the logo of the Tampa Bay Rays gleaming in the sunlight. Sunglasses hid his eyes as he stood upright, his arms crossed over his broad chest, grinning.
“You do know killing yourself before the game tonight won’t help you get recruited, right?” Luke cracked a joke as I slowed to a jog, and he joined me, easily keeping pace.
We’d been running trails for the last year together before a big game. It was how we had become friends—through our love of letting off steam.
“I know that, but I have to get rid of the nerves somehow, and this does the trick,” I grunted, catching his nod out of the corner of my eye. I knew he understood. Probably the only person who did.
He’d been a wreck a few months ago when he was offered a spot on two different teams, so we did a lot of running together. It helped him think, and I was there when he finally decided, and now, he was here for me.
“I hear from the grapevine that the Marlins are looking for a pitcher,” he suggested. There had been talk of him being drafted to their team, so he had started to hang with some of the younger players, working his way in.
“I’ve had my eye on the Braves, to be closer to home. With my brothers settling down and starting families, I want to be involved, especially with my nieces and nephews.” He already knew this, but it didn’t stop him from cracking a joke.
“You thinking about settling down already? Isn’t it too soon for the girl, house, dog, and kids?” He knew I wasn’t interested in any of that. Hell, none of the guys on the team were thinking about marriage or kids.
I bumped my shoulder with his, and he nearly ended up in the bushes. But his laughter echoed around us.
“Melanie got you thinking about marriage again, buddy?” He snorted at my question about his girlfriend, the girl he’d been dating since high school.
“Look, I know she’s the one. Doesn’t mean we’re even talking about marriage or any of that crap.” He’d always been defensive about her. The entire team loved his girlfriend. Hell, she had been our biggest fan for a long time and took care of all of us.
“But you’ve thought about it?” I asked, slowing to take a drink from the water fountain we were nearing.
He leaned against the fountain as I bent to take a long gulp. He stared at the sky, searching for his answer, but I had three older brothers who had fallen for women. I knew what it looked like, and my best friend was a goner.
“Luke?” I stood, wiping away the sweat from my forehead.
He wiped a hand down his face and sighed, looking ten years older in just one minute. “We had a pregnancy scare a few nights ago,” he mumbled, looking at me and then back at the trail. “And you know the worst part?”
I waited for him to keep talking. He loved Melanie more than his next breath, not that he’d ever admit it out loud, but he wasn’t ready for kids, and neither was she.
“I got fucking excited, man. The thought of her pregnant with my kid… It just made sense in my head. For a whole hour, I saw the future. I saw the house, the dog, and the kids, and I was okay with it.”
“But she isn’t pregnant?” I questioned.
“Nah, just late. She forgot her doctor changed her to a new birth control.” We resumed our jog, nodding at the other joggers as we passed them.
“How was she?” I asked when we stopped at our hotel building thirty minutes later.
“Devastated. Relieved. Fuck, I don’t know. She locked herself in the guest bedroom and wouldn’t come out. I still haven’t spoken to her today,” he said as we head into the lobby, cold air hitting us immediately.
“You’ve got an hour until Coach wants us at the field. Go on and call her. Tell her how much you love her, and it’ll be okay. Girls just want to know you feel the same.” He raised his brow at me, and I knew immediately I was going to regret my advice.
“When did you become an expert?” We stepped into the elevator, and he pressed the button for our floors.
“Two sisters-in-law, man. Women talk; I listen.”
“Right. Well, I’ll see you in an hour. Go shower. You stink. And relax that arm or you won’t be any good tonight.” He clapped me on the shoulder and exited the elevator with a salute.
My older brothers had found their path. They weren’t fumbling, getting lost, and turning back to find their way anymore.
I wanted to be like them. I was tired of stumbling in the dark, tripping over metaphorical roots and other obstacles. I was tired of playing a game I hated, tired of living up to everyone’s expectations of who I was supposed to be.
Football had been everything.
Had been.
When Arch tore his ACL and was the first one of us to give up the game, I waited to see Dad’s reaction, but he had none—just pure disappointment. Everyone was more worried about if Archer would be able to find his way. And then, the girl he had loved since he was a child came back to Honey Magnolia to settle her parents’ estate. Suddenly, nobody, even Dad, seemed to care about the career Archer had lost. All they cared about was the love story between Archer and his now wife, Kenna.
Dante made it. He made the big league and even got close to playing in a Superbowl, but then, he gave it up. I watched Dad, saw his disappointment, but Dante was tired of the parties. He wanted the life Archer and Kenna were living. He wanted to settle down and start a family. The playboy of the family was tired of playing the field. And then, like all good things happen, the girl he’d been smitten with in high school ran back home, escaping her abusive husband. It was fate that he decided to come home that day.
Gage surprised us all when he quit football without telling a soul and dropped out of college to become a paramedic of all things. Then, just like our two brothers, he fell in love with his childhood friend.
I hadn’t outright told any of them just how much I hated football. Archer knew I took up baseball in the off-season to keep fit, but he didn’t know just how hard I fell for the sport. Standing there on the mound in the center of the field, preparing myself to pitch a strike…
The chaos in my mind finally fell to silence. The weight of everyone’s approval disappeared. All that mattered was me, the ball, and the other player. With time, I had mastered my position, just like I had in football.
And over time, I had caught the eye of a few recruiters and cleat chasers.
The cleat chasers were like any young, na?ve girl—chasing a guy, hoping to catch his eye for a chance at his fame. I had fallen for the trap once, and as soon as she started asking for money, I sent her packing and ignored all the other girls who wore my jersey number and screamed my name.
I wasn’t looking for someone to settle down with. I wasn’t looking for a quick tumble in the sheets either.
I was only focused on my path.