Chapter 10
Not only do I dance like nobody is watching, but I also drink like I don’t work in the morning.
— Text from Keely to Cutter
KEELY
I was lost in my own thoughts, concentrating on what I was going to do when I got home, when two arms wrapped around me.
I tried to struggle at first, but I knew it was no use.
The conversation that I’d had with Dorie literally a couple of hours ago sprang to my mind as I continued to struggle and failed.
“ I’m just as strong as a man,” Dorie argued with her boyfriend, Michel .
Michel looked at her like she was crazy. “ Baby , you’re not. You lift. You’re five-foot-nine, and you’re a hundred and seventy-five pounds. But you’re not stronger than me.”
“ I am stronger than you,” she disagreed. “ Walking home by myself, I can definitely protect myself.”
“ Want to bet?” Michel asked her.
I rolled my eyes.
This was a constant fight with them.
Dorie felt like she was a badass and could protect herself if push came to shove.
Michel , however, didn’t feel that Dorie was capable of doing anything, let alone protecting herself.
I’d tried, and failed, to add in my two cents with Dorie .
She was dangerous, but not against other people, against herself.
She always walked home from the sleep center, which was in the middle of Dallas . We had homeless camping on every underpass within a ten-mile radius. We had criminals and gangs around every corner. And she had absolutely no care in the world.
She thought that she would be safe, no matter what, and she fought with Michel all the time about it, who just wanted to protect her and keep her safe.
Once I realized that I wasn’t going to break free, I started to freak out.
I cried and sobbed.
I couldn’t think straight.
All the shit from my childhood, from when my dad used to pin me down…
I just curled into a ball and cried.
My attacker let me go at some point.
A loud bang that would usually shock me back to reality only caused me to hiccup.
I was once again in someone’s arms, but these arms felt different.
Stronger . More firm.
But not intimidating.
I still cried—sobbed—but some innate sense of relief hit me as I was moved.
Warmth .
That’s what I felt as the overwhelming cold feeling started to thaw.
I don’t know how long that it lasted.
I did know that I was moved multiple times.
Softness encompassed my body as I was wrapped in something warm.
Then the soothing tones of someone speaking to me filled my senses.
The man’s voice was perfect.
Deep and raspy.
He talked to me about everything and nothing at the same time.
At one point, I guess my mind finally allowed me to come back online, and I came to wrapped in a blanket sitting in someone’s lap.
I froze, all crying ceased, and in a very careful voice, I said to the blanket that I was practically smothered in, “ Who are you?”
“ I’m guessing you already know,” he imparted.
I swallowed hard. “ You’re Shasha’s brother.”
I heard him hum his approval. “ Say my name.”
I swallowed hard. “ Dima .”
“ Good girl,” he crooned.
I shuddered in his arms and said, “ How did you know?”
There was a long pause and then, “ Do you want to know the safe answer, the one that won’t freak you out? Or do you want to know the real one?”
I thought about that long and hard for a few minutes before I said, “ I don’t know.”
He slid his fingers up my back and asked, “ How did you know it was me?”
I worried my lips for a few long seconds before I said, “ Your brother. He came over after Pettigrew was assassinated and asked me if I knew you. When I said that I had never met you, and didn’t know anything about you, he let it go. But he did say that you were in the area on another errand for him. That day before I went to bed, I went to the email you sent with your health report and found your name in small print at the top.”
“ I wasn’t trying to hide my identity from you…not really,” he admitted.
I stayed silent for so long that he must’ve thought I was asleep, because he stood up with me in his arms and walked on silent feet into his bedroom.
He laid me down on the bed, and went to move away, but I caught his hand, quickly clutching onto his wrist before saying, “ Stay .”
He crawled into the bed with me, fully clothed, and curled himself around my body.
The next thing I remembered, I was waking up still wrapped up in the warm blanket, in a completely empty house.
I got up and used the restroom, then cursed when I saw the time.
It was well past noon, and I only had a few hours until my shift.
But the thought of going to work…it sounded awful.
Like the worst idea ever.
Which was why I called in sick.
The thought of working with Dorie right now…no.
I couldn’t do it today.
I was so freakin’ mad at her.
Her and her inability to see anything outside of her little bubble of delusion had wrecked me last night.
Maybe my brother had the right idea.
To cut her off.
But she was really one of my only friends.
To say that I wasn’t the most open of people would be an understatement.
But Dorie had proven, time and time again, that she wasn’t a very good friend. Last night had only cemented that fact.
I called my immediate boss and requested the night off. Then , I sent an email to the man that did scheduling and asked to be taken off all shifts with Dorie . If they couldn’t accommodate me, I’d be putting in my two weeks’ notice.
I received an email before I’d even finished in the bathroom that the request was granted, and from then on, no shifts would be given with Dorie . Nor would any of our shifts align in a way that we would have to see each other at all.
Once I was finished with my phone calls and snooping through Dima’s medicine cabinet in the bathroom—the man was a minimalist. He had deodorant, a toothbrush, toothpaste and soap in his medicine cabinet— I went in search of him in the rest of the house.
But , like I’d expected, I was completely alone.
There was, however, a note on the kitchen cabinet that said, “ Had to watch my sister’s brats for a bit. I’m at Nastya’s if you want to come over.”
I contemplated heading over there, but felt like that would raise too many questions I didn’t have answers to at the moment.
So instead, I stole his truck and headed home.
Though , I wasn’t sure if you could call it stealing if the keys were on the hook.
If he didn’t want me to drive it, he wouldn’t have left the keys, right?
I pulled into my parking spot at my place, then called my brother for a ride before he headed into his shift at the hospital.
Chevy was an anesthesiologist that usually worked twelve-hour overnight shifts at the hospital.
Today was no different as he pulled up on his bike and came to a stop in front of my complex’s front doors.
“ Why did you leave your car at Dorie’s place?” he asked.
“ I caught a ride home from a friend,” I evaded.
It wasn’t the whole truth, but it was enough of one that he didn’t call me on a lie.
He zipped through the downtown streets of Dallas and arrived on Dorie’s block about fifteen minutes later.
We pulled to a stop in front of my car, and I got off the bike.
Kissing Chevy on the cheek, I said, “ Thanks for the ride, brother bear.”
He rolled his eyes at the familiar nickname.
“ Get in,” he grumbled.
I did, starting my car up and pulling out once he gave me enough room.
He followed me for a bit, then took the turn-off that would lead to the hospital, while I kept going straight. I pulled into the parking lot for Costco , then got out once I found a spot near the back of the lot.
I was showing the woman my membership card when I felt a presence beside me. As in, right up in my space.
And , let’s just say, this being Costco , I was used to my personal space being invaded.
But after yesterday, there was no way in hell I could deal with that invasion.
I opened my mouth, ready to get pissed the fuck off at someone invading my personal space but looked up to spot Dima with his hat pulled down low over his eyes.
I promptly closed my mouth tight and kept walking.
He didn’t say anything as he walked beside me, but he did add a few things to my cart when I looked at them but didn’t get them.
The first of which was a chocolate cake that was the size of Jesus’s love.
The second was a platter of sushi that I had no hope of getting through in a week, let alone the three days it said it was good until.
I didn’t say anything because I wanted them, and I had a feeling he’d be sharing them with me.
But when he pulled out a brisket the size of Texas itself, I said, “ I have no clue how you think we’re going to be able to eat that, but I don’t have a stomach big enough for all of this.”
“ The brisket is for tomorrow. I’ll cook it at my place and you can come over for dinner,” he suggested.
“ Why not just go out to eat at a barbeque place and save the forty dollars?” I asked.
“ Because brisket that I cook will be a hundred times better than anything you can get at any barbeque place in town,” he said. “ How do you feel about naan?”
That was how our Costco trip went.
We got a lot of stuff that we didn’t need, and by the time that we were pulling up at the checkout line, the cashier asked if we were having a party.
It was me that said, “ He has zero control.”
She eyed the man at my side and said, “ I hate to tell you this, but that man looks like he has more control than the president.”
I snorted.
Dima said nothing.
And when the lady at the door checked our receipts, Dima placed himself behind me so that the asshole pushing his cart up to my ass couldn’t get any closer.
There were some whispered words, and when next I looked back, that guy had put about eight feet between us.
“ People need to learn personal space,” he murmured quietly.
“ Absolutely ,” I agreed. “ I’ve been saying that for years. I liked the time when social distancing was a thing because it allowed me to have six feet of space and no one complained at all.”
But I noticed as we walked that generally, everyone kept their distance.
So the key to people giving you space was obviously to have an intimidating man that looked like he could kill you with a flick of his finger at your side.
He helped me put my groceries into my trunk, then walked to his motorcycle that he’d squeezed between my parking space and the one next to me.
It wasn’t a Harley like my brothers’ bikes. It was a sleek, black, fast-looking number that looked like it could easily go two hundred miles an hour.
I backed out, and he followed suit, following me all the way home.
And let me tell you another benefit of having a tall, capable man at your side.
He could carry in a shit ton of groceries without breaking a sweat and didn’t complain when you took too long checking your mail.
After I had the mail in my hands, we took the stairs up three flights—another thing that he knew about me—him leading the way like he knew I was going to go that way.
Another little niggle at the back of my brain that said that I was being very carefully watched without my knowledge.
But there was a part of me that liked that he knew so much about me.
I liked that I didn’t have to tell him something.
I liked that he already knew that I was a little bit eccentric.
We put everything away except for the sushi, which he brought to the coffee table in my living room.
It was there that he queued up my favorite show and even went to the correct season I’d left off at the last time I’d been able to watch.
He pressed play, pointed at the chair directly in front of the television and said, “ Sit . I’ll grab our drinks.”
He came back moments later with two sets of chopsticks, a water for him, and a glass of tea for me.
I took a sip and knew before the brew had hit my tongue that it would be the perfect way that I liked it.
And it was.
The blend of lemon and sweet tea was just how I would’ve made it myself.
I licked my lips when I was done, setting the glass down beside his water, and said, “ How long have you been watching me?”
I hit pause on my show as he said, “ Want it all?”
I licked my lips, then nodded.
“ If I tell you, there’s no going back for me. Once you know…”
Once I knew, I’d have to be quiet about what I heard.
I kind of had an idea of what I would hear— IE him killing a man to protect me.
But what I got was so much more.
“ I’ve been watching you for months,” he began. “ Way before your brother and my sister met.”
I nodded.
“ Shasha had an issue with the doctor that worked with you. McCinnish ,” he continued. “ He was drugging his patients…”
He then went on to explain all the bad things that the doctor had done in his time at our sleep center. From assault, to rape, to stealing. He’d done it all.
When he’d explained that he’d finished him off by making him look like he’d had a heart attack, I couldn’t find a single ounce of pity for McCinnish .
That part of me was broken—the one that felt sympathy for others when they’d experienced something horrendous.
I mean, sure, logically, I could sympathize with actual victims. But with men that hurt innocent people all for his own personal gain? No , I wasn’t ever going to feel bad about a man like that no longer living on this earth.
I hoped there was a special place in hell that he went and reaped what he’d sown.
While he’d spoken, Dima hadn’t once taken his eyes off of me.
“…and then I saw you,” he explained. “ And I became…obsessed.”
I turned my full attention toward him. “ Are you sure that this is a good idea?”
“ You mean, you and me?” he asked.
I licked my lips and nodded.
“ I’m not one hundred percent sure that I’m altogether sane anymore,” he admitted. “ There’s something fundamentally broken inside of me. The United States government made sure of that. My gut says I got out too late.”
I leaned back in my seat and said, “ Whatever is broken inside of me is drawn to that broken part in you.”
He picked up a piece of sushi with his chopsticks and said, “ I have cameras in your place.”
I nodded. “ I figured.”
“ I followed you home multiple times,” he continued.
“ I figured that, too.”
“ I shot your friend’s boyfriend last night,” he confessed.
I blinked at him. “ Really ?”
“ Really ,” he replied. “ He doesn’t know who I am or anything, but I’m sure it won’t take them very much to connect all the pieces if they see us together.”
“ I’m done with her,” I admitted. “ I can’t deal with that kind of stupidity anymore.”
He picked up another piece of sushi—my favorite—and handed it to me.
I took the whole piece into my mouth and chewed.
His eyes sparkled as he said, “ I killed that man that hurt you when you were younger, too.”
I smiled then.
It wasn’t a pleasant smile. “ I wish I’d been there to see it.”
His eyes gleamed then. “ I have it recorded.”
I barked out a laugh around another bite of sushi.
Food went everywhere.
He didn’t seem to care, only grabbing a piece of paper towel and wiping it all up into his palm before depositing it into the towel and folding it in quarters.
Once he was done, he said, “ I don’t know that I should have kids. I’m violent, Keely .”
“ I haven’t gotten that far into my thought process on us,” I told him honestly. “ I’m just getting comfortable with an idea that there is an us, let alone an us and more.”
He nodded once. “ Fair .”
“ So what next?” I asked.
He held out another bite of sushi for me before saying, “ Now we dance.”