Chapter 20
CHAPTER TWENTY
CALVIN
I’ve seen death. Up close, personal, and traumatizing.
But I’ve never seen a murder. It’s… messy.
Messy as fuck.
But Atlas handled it well. Better than I thought he would when he saw a man standing over me with a sharp knife, ready to end my existence.
Seeing him lay waste to the man, keeping me safe… wasn’t as scary as I thought it would be. It wasn’t some sexy thing that made me want to jump his bones, but it wasn’t frightening.
Atlas was cold and clinical, exactly what I would expect when he had to kill. But I expected nothing less from someone like him—put together, calculating.
After taking my bag to the car, I come back into the living room and sit down on the couch. I hear them moving around in my bedroom, talking in low voices, but I don’t join them. Just because I’ve seen fresh dead bodies doesn’t mean I want to see how they dispose of one.
I’m not sure how much more of this will be coming at us, but I need to be ready. What happened in my bedroom was fear and luck. There was nothing strategic about it, nothing that gave me the upper hand. I just moved at the right time, under the right circumstances.
If the man with the giant knife hadn’t wanted to gloat, had he just come up behind me and slit my throat like Atlas did to him, it would be me on the floor, my blood a halo around me as I gasped my last breath.
That can’t happen again.
Whatever this is, it’s not over, and I need to be better if I’m going to keep Atlas alive.
I scoff as I listen to him and North laugh about something. Laughing while cleaning up a body… are they psychopaths or something?
Atlas showed me he doesn’t need me to take care of him; it’s me who needs to be taken care of.
No, I won’t let that happen. We’re partners, a team. If he’s going to keep me safe, I have to do the same. When they’re done in my room, I’ll grab my gun and keep it on me at all times. We’re in a concealed carry state, so as long as I don’t flash it at anyone, I’ll be fine.
Fifteen minutes later, Atlas comes out of the room, his hands clean but his clothes a bloody fucking mess.
“We’re almost done,” he says, inclining his head toward the bedroom. “North just has to move him. I’m going to shower. Maybe you should come into the bathroom with me while he works.”
Yeah, good idea. I’m not sure about the state of the body and I don’t want to know. Whatever they do is their business.
“Okay, yeah,” I say, getting to my feet and skirting around Atlas and entering the bathroom.
My bedroom door opens and I busy myself getting the shower turned on and to a perfect temperature for Atlas. If I don’t focus on something, I’ll turn around and see something I might not want to see.
The two of them talk in the hall for a few seconds while I pull down a towel and washcloth from my rack.
I breathe out a sigh of relief when the door shuts behind Atlas, and I feel his body heat through my clothes.
“You okay?” he asks, his breath trailing across my neck.
“I will be.” I turn around and face him, seeing the worried expression on his face. “Atlas…” I sigh and lower my head, my forehead pressed to his chest. “I’m sorry. I should have… I don’t know, fought harder.”
“What?” Atlas tips my head up and I shiver at his touch. “Calvin, you did what you needed to do to stay alive. You called me.”
“What would have happened if I hadn’t had the chance? I was careless and I didn’t pay attention to my surroundings. Knowing what we’re going through, that was a mistake.”
“If you want to learn to protect yourself—”
I cut him off. “I want to learn to protect you.” He gives me a look and I huff. “Atlas, you might be a badass motherfucker who can kill a man in a single bound or some shit, but everyone needs help. Just let me, okay?”
He smirks and tilts his head, giving me that sexy look that I’ve fallen in love with. “I don’t think Superman killed anyone.”
I roll my eyes, but smile back. “Yeah, well, you’re my Superman, but you’re not invincible. Let me help you. Teach me like you taught your sons. We don’t have much time, but I’m a fast learner.”
Atlas hums and nods. “Okay. Let me clean the blood off and we can go. We’ll talk about you learning some hand-to-hand when I’m done.”
“Is it safe to go into the living room or should I… ?”
“You should definitely stay here. North is reveling in cleaning up after me. Blood might be all over the place.”
I give him a deadpan look. “I’m a nurse. I’ve seen blood.”
“I know. But I want you to keep me company too.”
“Fine.”
I help him get undressed—mainly so I can see his body—and Atlas climbs into the shower.
It strikes me as a little odd that I’m thinking about seeing Atlas’s body after I saw him execute a man, but it’s not like I didn’t know it was possible.
It’s not like Keegan will be content with Atlas killing his men, and Mitchell won’t allow authorities to apprehend him just because I want things to be bloodless.
There was always the chance this would be the outcome.
I won’t think too much about it. What I need to focus on is how I’ll keep us safe.
He steps under the shower spray and I sit on the toilet. We talk about nothing, steering away from the more serious conversation of what happened in my room or what could have happened.
It’s something we’ll talk about another day.
Way in the future.
“You can use anything as a weapon,” Atlas says the next day as we stand behind his house. “Even a pen.”
“Atlas,” I say patiently. “I’ve worked in the emergency room. I’ve seen some diabolical shit. Someone using a pen is the least inventive.”
His smile is both proud and primal. He takes my face in his hands and kisses me hard. “Yeah, I know. But you have to know how to strike someone with the pen so they’re mortally wounded, not just hurt.”
When we got home last night, the last thing I wanted to do was talk about what happened at my apartment. Thankfully, Ranen was there when we arrived and he kept me company while North and Atlas were doing whatever it is they did with the man who’d tried to murder me.
Ranen was all smiles, telling me the last time they’d had to dispose of someone, he had to wait with Atlas while North and Wylder did their thing. “It’s better hanging with someone who isn’t ancient.”
“Hey,” I said, gently slapping him on the arm, “don’t talk about my man when you’re dating a psycho who likes to gloat while cleaning up a body.”
Ranen smiled, his eyes going dreamy. “I know, right?”
Maybe it’s weird that Ranen and are in love with people who kill without remorse. But… fuck it, life is too short to deny ourselves, I guess.
Focusing back on Atlas, I say, “Okay, killing with a pen. Show me how.”
I know the points of entry on a body that will kill someone—anatomy was a big part of my nursing courses—but I like how Atlas explains things to me. He’s thorough, giving me insight that only someone with familiarity could.
Once we go through all the ways he’s shown me to kill, over and over, Atlas takes me through some hand-to-hand combat that will get me out of a similar situation to the one I was in yesterday, so I can get away if I don’t have the upper hand.
Atlas puts me on the ground, his arm around my neck, and tells me, “Get out of this hold, just like I taught you. Try not to actually hurt me, though, okay?”
I bark a strangled laugh and grab on to his wrist.
I’ve taken a few self-defense classes, but nothing like what Atlas has taught me. In those classes, I learned how to incapacitate briefly to get away. Atlas has shown me how to break holds and bones, leaving my attacker a crying mess before I finish them off. Hopefully, I’ll never need that part.
With a firm grip on him, I knock my head back into his nose, hearing Atlas grunt in pain.
I’m sure if he really wanted to hurt me, that wouldn’t stop him, but his grip loosens and I use my weight, slight as it is, against his bulk, and buck him off me.
When he’s on his back, I scramble onto him and straddle his lap, putting my hands around his throat.
I apply a small amount of pressure, watching Atlas’s eyes blow wide, his dick hardening under me. “How was that?” I ask in a voice I don’t recognize.
“Really fucking good,” he grunts, his hands trailing along my hips before landing on my ass. “You’re a good student. But there’s so much more I want to show you.”