30. Willa #2
“Yeah”—she buttons her green peacoat over her jumper—“the Christmas Spectacular is tonight, and they called for an early morning dress rehearsal. It’s a revue of all the holiday clichés. You’re coming with everyone, right?”
“Oh, I don’t want to intrude on any family traditions.”
Maya slides into the chair next to me and pulls the highchair beside her on the other side.
Her auburn curls cascade from a high ponytail, freckles covering every inch of visible skin.
“Willa, you’re family, and you’re coming.
Whether. You. Like. It. Or. Not.” She pokes my shoulder with a smile, punctuating her last words.
“Well, I’m excited to come then.” That’s twice in less than ten minutes I’ve been told I’m part of the family.
They’ve been more than accommodating. Everyone’s extremely friendly, but my cognitive dissonance surrounding family is working overtime.
I can’t get the feeling of impending implosion out of my head.
“Yay! You’ll love it!” Lainey squeezes my shoulder as she passes behind me and sits in the chair on my other side. “So tell me, what’s LA like?”
“Busy.” I laugh. “Loud and busy, but there’s lots to do.”
“I’ve always wanted to go to a musical out there. Tre took me to one in San Francisco a couple years ago, which was awesome, but LA just seems bigger and better.”
“Where’s T, anyway?” Maya asks to no one in particular.
“The boys went into town for supplies to fix the southern perimeter.” Adele slips a steaming platter of pancakes on the table, glancing at the sound of a door closing.
“The calves keep wandering over to Elizabeth’s training stables.
She’s been giving Eli an earful—I know you’re not wearing a hat in my house, Trevor. ”
“Uncle Tre!” Harper and Hazel bolt from their seats, taking hold of each of Trevor’s legs as he slips a black, snow-covered cowboy hat off his head.
“Who’s Uncle Tre?” he teases, lowering his neck gaiter and beaming down at them, then smiling at me as if I’m the only other person in the room.
He makes a show of hauling the twins across the floor while they giggle and squeal, trying to hang on as his boots shuffle across the hardwood.
His dark brown sherpa-lined coat is unzipped, exposing a gray US Coast Guard hoodie underneath.
Where has this damn cowboy been hiding ?
Shit. Now I’m having dirty thoughts of him, me, and that hat at the breakfast table.
Bringing the twins right up to my chair, he places a hand on the back of it. “I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. We’re about to head south, and I?—”
“Yes, T. She’s fin e.” Maya rolls her eyes. “You think we’re gonna vaporize her?”
“More like talk her to death,” he says.
“Is he always like this?” Lainey asks me.
I nod, squinting playfully at him. “Usually, it’s worse.”
“Hey! I came home this year and everything. Be nice to me,” he says to his sisters. He squeezes my shoulder, leaving his hand there for a few lingering seconds.
“We won’t lose her, Trevor. Might even feed her while you’re gone,” Adele teases.
His head shakes in exasperation, but the smile remains on his face. “Okay, I’m going. I’ll have my phone, so if any?—”
“We got it!”
“Boy, get out of my kitchen!”
“Chill, bro.”
All three voices ring out at the same time, and I don’t even try to hide the giggle bubbling from my throat.
“Look, I know how to take care of her better than anyone here. I will personally make sure she only rides one horse,” Maya says.
“Ooh, that sounds fun!” I say with a teasing smile. “Baby’s first horseback ride.”
He sucks his teeth, shaking his head at the collective laughter from his mom and sisters.
“Yeah. You’ll fit right in here, Gem.” Trevor presses a kiss on the top of my head and stoops to peel the nieces off his ankles.
He grabs a pancake from the table, smiles at the protest from his mom, and leaves the way he came.
“Aw, he calls you Gem ? That’s so sweet!” Lainey makes a puppy dog face, complete with a puffed out lower lip. “It’s nice to see him so happy.”
“He’s not usually like this?”
Maya snorts. “We wouldn’t know. He’s never brought anyone home before. Looks like you’re doing a great job keeping him on his toes though.”
Luckily, the room is so busy no one seems to notice how speechless I am. Never ? Trevor’s never brought anyone home before now? I’m the first one? How is that even possible?
Lainey scarfs down her breakfast and is out the door before I’ve added blueberry syrup to my pancakes.
Adele finishes up at the stove and joins us at the table, sitting directly across from me, right in between Hazel and Harper.
“Alright girls, it’s just us today. We got a fresh blanket of snow last night, so I’m thinking it’s a snowman day. ”
Harper dances in her seat, hyped up by Hazel’s cheering, accented by little Holland giving her best attempt at saying snowman . Maya nudges me with her elbow. “Perfect. She can tire them out while we stay warm and cozy in here. Do you like cross-stitch?”
“I’ve never done it before.” I shrug. “Photography’s my go-to hobby, but I’ll try it.”
Her eyes flash with amusement. “I’m not the best, but it keeps my fingers nimble for surgery. We can both ride the struggle bus today. ”
We finish up in the kitchen, and Adele takes the girls outside, leaving me and Maya to craft the day away , as she put it.
I wait in the family room, admiring the thick, white beams checkered across the ceiling as the matching carved column fireplace crackles on the far wall.
From here, we can watch the girls and Adele playing in the snow through the picture window.
My feet sink into the plush beige carpet as I settle on one couch with a sigh.
It’s so peaceful here . My phone buzzes.
Trevor
Ready for a nap yet?
Me
It’s only been an hour.
Trevor
This fence is gonna take a lot longer than I was led to believe. Say the word, and I’ll come back.
Me
I’m fine, Tre. About to hang out with Maya
*Trev
Trevor
You can call me Tre if you wanna, since we’re about to be family.
Me
According to everyone here, I already am.
Trevor
Must be true then
“Okay, we have lots of choices here. Mom’s hobby is collecting craft supplies so we have everything from ‘beginner’ to ‘what the hell was she thinking buying this professional pattern?’”
“Definitely beginner. Between pregnancy brain and pregnancy clumsiness, I don’t want to press my luck while wielding a needle. ”
“Isn’t the brain fog the worst ?” Maya laughs as she digs through a blue plastic tote.
“It’s so bad. I used to be smart, and now I find my car keys in the microwave.”
“When I was pregnant with the twins, my husband Ben would follow behind, replacing anything I put in the wrong place. He’s on call at the hospital for the holiday, but he should be here tonight for Lainey’s show.
” She smiles, her gaze falling into one of professionalism.
“How are you feeling otherwise? Any complications?”
“Nope. Nothing besides the morning sickness, but that’s kind of died off too.”
“That’s good news. I was on bedrest for both of my pregnancies. My cervix just did not like holding them in there. Plus the whole ‘advanced maternal age’ aspect.”
I shudder at the thought. “I’d go crazy if I was forced to be in bed all day. How did you make it?”
“Cross-stitch.” She laughs and digs in the box, coming out with beginner and intermediate patterns.
“And yet, I somehow didn’t master it.” Maya hands mine over and plops on the opposite end of the couch, pulling her legs up on the cushion.
We take a few minutes of silence to read the instructions and sort the multicolored floss.
I’m stretching my canvas over the plastic frame when Maya’s phone buzzes by her feet.
She snorts. “Trevor told me to make sure you’re drinking enough water, like I don’t take care of pregnant women for a living. ”
“Has he always been so attentive?”
“Yep.” Her nose wrinkles. “He was a super shy kid and needed to observe every situation before joining in. In foster care, he would watch everything from the corner, no matter where we were. The shyness melted away once we got stable here, but his protectiveness only got worse, as you’ve seen.
” Her giggle reveals the slight impression of dimples on her cheeks.
They’re not as deep, but I can see the resemblance to her brother.
Well, to Trevor. Eli, on the other hand, looks completely different with his dark brown skin and black hair.
“Can I ask…you and Trevor look so much alike, but Eli…” My voice trails as I realize how personal this conversation is. Not everyone likes talking about their family business like this.
Her smile melts my worry. “Yeah, so T and I have the same bio mom and dad, and we take after our dad. Eli has a different dad, but he takes after our birth mom.”
“So your dad had the auburn hair too?”
“Yep. A Black man with red hair and freckles. Minus all the freckles that I got, T looks just like him, which was a big part of the problem…”
Nodding, I slide my gaze to the embroidery hoop in my hand. I don’t have the slightest clue what she means, but we’re crossing into some private history I have no business asking about until the information is offered up to me.
“He hasn’t talked about all of that much, has he?”
“I know the basics, but we don’t have to get into it. It’s personal.”
“Girl, you’re family now. You’re carrying a part of him. These are things you should know, if just to be able to pass the information on to your child.”
Family . The way Maya sets down her cross-stitch and puts all her attention on me makes me feel like they all might just be serious.
I’m family . I haven’t felt awkward once since arriving yesterday.
If anything, they’ve been a little too open at times.
Like you’d expect from family . These strangers have opened up their home and hearts so easily, but it doesn’t feel strange.
I’m more at home here, in one day, than I’ve ever been in my parents’ house.
“You’ve seen his nervous habit, right?” Maya asks.
“Um…”
“The love songs?”
“Oh.” I laugh. “Yeah, he doesn’t do it as much anymore, but it was all the love ballads every time I got in his car for the first few weeks of the pregnancy. ”
“Yeah, he was overwhelmed. He’s been listening to them to calm his nerves since he was little.
And I’ve learned enough about you to know you’re not going to ask why, so I’ll just tell you.
” Her eyes narrow as she wags a finger at me playfully.
“Whenever our birth parents would fight, I’d grab headphones and my portable cassette player, crank it loud, and put Trevor in the closet so he didn’t have to see or hear any of it.
The only cassettes I had were ’90s R&B and boy bands.
We’ve worked through a ton of shit, but that habit of his is one soothing technique he’s held on to. I’m the one that gave it to him.”
My mouth drops. I’m such a bitch . “Oh my God. I’ve been teasing the hell out of him. If I had known…”
“Hey, don’t feel guilty about not knowing.
” She smiles, placing her hand on my knee.
“We’ve both been through extensive therapy, and he’s a good sport about it now.
He accepts it as a part of his self-regulation toolbox.
” After a squeeze, she sits back against the arm of the sofa, getting right into her stitching.
“Now, I don’t know how long Nana can keep those girls outside, so let’s get started. ”
How can I focus on making tiny x ’s in the fabric now? My mind is busy replaying every single time I got into Trevor’s car and rolled my eyes at his music choices. How many times did he hide his overwhelm, all because I was being mean as hell?