Chapter 36
SOFIA
“Can you believe it?” I asked Haley once I’d told her everything I’d learned at the base. “It’s absolutely crazy. He’s supposed to be retired, but he’s been working behind the scenes to get rid of Lincoln.”
My best friend leaned back against the pillows on her bed, clutching one to her chest, and stared at me with disbelief shining in her wide eyes. “I always knew he would do whatever he thought was necessary to protect you, but this does seem like overkill.”
“You think?” I groaned, collapsing onto her bed and lying back. “It’s such a mess. I just can’t believe he would do that to someone.”
“Least of all to one of his precious SEALs,” she murmured. “He lives for those guys.”
“It figures that he’d treat them all like his sons, except for the one I end up falling for.” I covered my face with one of her pillows, digging deep to find a sliver of calm to grasp onto.
Haley had still been at the deli when I’d arrived at her place after that meeting with my dad. Having some time alone had been good for me, but I’d been more than ready to talk once she arrived home.
Armed with a bottle of wine, she’d sat me down and listened patiently as I ranted and raved. It had taken me hours to get everything out, and now I was out of words but still emotional.
She rolled over to face me, propping her head on the stack of pillows and her hand underneath her cheek. “I know it sucks. Nothing I can say can really make it better, but I don’t think he did it to hurt you.”
“Maybe he didn’t realize how much it would hurt me, but he knew it would.
” That was what made it even worse. “I’m just struggling to wrap my head around it all, you know?
Thanks for letting me sleep here tonight.
I really wasn’t looking forward to having to go home and starting with round two just yet. ”
“Both of you might have ended up saying things you’d regret.” She smiled. “You know you’re always welcome here. I’m glad you decided to stay.”
“So am I.” I sighed as I flicked off the lamp on the nightstand on my side of the bed. Haley’s was still on, but it wasn’t very bright all by itself.
With the room softly lit and the quiet both inside it and out, I couldn’t believe the madness my life had become. Sighing as I wondered when I’d been catapulted into a world where my father was the villain, I folded my hands over my stomach and shook my head.
“I’m thinking about transferring to a school closer to home,” I said. “I know UCLA isn’t that far away, but I want to be here. You’re here, Lincoln’s here, and Dad’s here. We might be fighting now, but I hope we won’t always be.”
“Where is this coming from?” she asked quietly. “You’ve been looking forward to going to UCLA since we were juniors.”
“Yeah, I know. I want to be closer to you all, though. I also want to be able to be there for Lincoln in the coming months. I can’t do that from LA.”
“Why do you need to be there for him?”
I shrugged, licking my lips as I tried to verbalize the decision I’d made before she’d gotten home. “One way or the other, I think he’s going to leave the military. I wouldn’t blame him if he did, even if they gave him another chance and didn’t discharge him.”
“Makes sense.” I heard the concern creeping into her voice. “But transferring to a different school at this point of your degree seems risky. What happens if your dad found out you transferred to be closer to Lincoln? How will that affect your relationship with him?”
“Honestly? I don’t care what he thinks about it at this point.
He made a mistake. A big one. As I said, I hope we’ll move past it, but I don’t know when that’s going to happen.
In the meantime, I want to be closer to you and Lincoln.
I can help you out with the deli’s marketing and promotion and be there for Linc.
Being closer will also help when Dad and I start getting our relationship back on track. ”
“You don’t have to help me,” she said. “It’d be great having you closer, but I think you need to put the time you could spend helping me out toward your studies.”
“True, but I could do both.”
She chuckled. “You’re brilliant at school, but not even you are that good. Trying to juggle your studies, promotion for the deli, and whatever is happening with Lincoln and with your dad won’t end well.”
“Maybe.” I nibbled at the back of my bottom lip. “It doesn’t have to be a full-time thing, though. I could help you out when I have time, be there for Lincoln, and still focus on school.”
She reached out to squeeze my arm. “Thanks for the offer, but I’d rather you use the time you would have been helping me on your schoolwork. Depending on what happens with Lincoln, he might also need your help more than I do.”
I snorted. “Even if he does, he’ll never admit it.”
“Maybe not, but that doesn’t mean he won’t need you.” She paused for a beat. “Do you really think he’ll leave the military?”
“I don’t know. Whatever he decides, I’ll support him. I just hope he gets to make a decision and that it isn’t made for him.”
“After everything Eden said, do you think your dad would have changed his mind about him and give him another chance?”
“I have to believe he will.” I closed my eyes and sent up a brief prayer.
“My dad might be strict and set in his ways, but surely, he can’t continue with a crusade as irrational and unreasonable as this one.
I have to keep my faith in him. No matter how pissed off I am, I have to believe he’ll do the right thing. ”
“What if his idea of the right thing and yours aren’t the same?”
Pain lanced through me at the thought. “Then I guess I’ll just have to make peace with the fact that he’s not the person I thought he was. Talking about honor and living with it are two very different things.”
“I guess that’s true.” Both of us fell silent after that. After a while, Haley flipped her light off too and I felt the mattress move as she got comfortable. “Try to get some sleep, okay? We don’t have to figure everything out today.”
“Thank God for that,” I said. “Good night, Haley. Thanks again for letting me vent to you.”
She laughed softly. “Anytime, friend. Any damn time.”
Despite thinking I wouldn’t be able to sleep, I drifted off surprisingly fast. When I woke up the next morning, Haley was already making coffee.
It was mid-morning, and she had to rush to open the deli, so we didn’t get much more talking done. I took a quick shower, dressed in a pair of old yoga pants and a tank top I kept at her house precisely for all the nights I’d stayed over spontaneously, and headed home.
My father’s car was in the driveway when I got there. I hadn’t expected him to be home, but I was kind of glad he was. I had to face him at one point or another. It was probably better to get it over with.
Dragging in a deep, calming breath, I opened the door and hated the anxiety I felt over having to see my own father. He was sitting at the kitchen table reading the newspaper but looked up as soon as I walked in.
“We need to talk,” he said, motioning toward the coffeepot. “Fix yourself a cup and come have a seat. Thank you for letting me know you were staying at Haley’s, by the way.”
I nodded stiffly, taking my seat without getting a dose of caffeine. “What do you want to talk about?”
Dad’s hazel eyes settled on mine. “I brought Lincoln back.”
I sat bolt upright, my palms suddenly sweaty. “You did? Where is he? What did you do to him?”
“I didn’t do anything to him,” he said gruffly. Drumming his fingers on the table, he sighed and ran his other hand through his hair. “Look, I know you and I haven’t seen eye to eye on this matter.”
“This matter being you trying to destroy my boyfriend’s career?” I raised my eyebrows. “Seriously, Dad. You might as well say it like it is.”
Dad exhaled loudly, his eyes narrowing on mine. “Did I act brashly when I found out you were seeing him? Yes, but I had my reasons.”
“Yeah, you think he’s dangerous because he has the balls to stand up to you.” Deciding that I needed that coffee after all, I shoved my chair back and went to get some. “He’s not dangerous, Dad. Not to me anyway. I respect him for doing what he needs to if it gets the job done.”
“So do I,” Dad said.
The words came as such a surprise that I dropped the teaspoon in my hand. It fell to the counter with a tinkering clatter, but I’d get it later. Whirling around, I frowned at my father. “If that’s true, why are you so hellbent on punishing him for it?”
“I’m not hellbent on punishing him for it.” He scowled but then hung his head and ran his hands over the back of it multiple times. “Jesus. I don’t have to explain myself to you, but let me try. It’s obvious that you still think I’m on the wrong side of this.”
“Because you are,” I replied simply.
Dad merely rolled his eyes. “No, I’m not. Lincoln has always had the potential to be great, but he’s disappointed a lot of people over the years.”
“So that makes it okay to kick him out?”
“Well, yes.” He held up his hands when I tried to interrupt. “Hear me out, okay? The last thing I want is for the Navy to lose someone who has his potential, but there comes a time when men who don’t realize their potential become dangerous.”
Genuine sadness darkened his eyes. “I can only train these people for so long. I can make them the best I can, but then it’s up to them.
Every once in a while, someone with great instincts and natural talent comes along.
It’s always exciting, and everyone always expects great things, but those great things don’t always happen. ”
“Why? Because they don’t follow your timelines about when they have to start climbing the ranks?”
“No, Sofia.” He huffed out a breath. “It’s not my timelines, and it’s not about climbing the ranks.
It’s about egos. Guys like him know how good they are, but that tempts them to act out.
They think they can do whatever the hell they want to because their over-inflated egos make them believe they know better than their superiors. ”
“Maybe they do,” I countered.
Dad’s palm slammed into the table. “No, they don’t. It’s that attitude that gets people killed. There’s a hierarchy for a reason. If one person falls out of line, good people die.”
“But Eden said Lincoln saved all those people,” I argued. “No one died because he saved them all.”
“In that instance, yes. It doesn’t always work out that way. He’s gotten lucky, but luck runs out. It’s my job to stop him before that happens.”
“So that’s it?” I sat back, crossing my arms as my chest deflated. “You kicked him out because of something that hasn’t happened yet?”
“No, I reined him in before something like that could happen.” He shook his head, his jaw tight. “The investigation served its purpose. We found out the truth, and we acted accordingly.”
“What does mean?” My head dropped to the side, fear suddenly gripping my heart. “You said you didn’t do anything to him.”
“I didn’t do anything to him,” he muttered. His hands balled into fists as he glared at me. “The Navy needs him, so I gave him a choice.”
“What choice?” My voice was tight and thick with emotion.
Dad’s features relaxed, and I even saw a flash of sympathy in his eyes. “I told him he would have to command his own unit if he wanted to stay.”
“Command his own…” I trailed off, not really believing what I was hearing. “You’re sending him to war to keep him away from me?”
“It’s not to keep him away from you.” His gaze hardened again. “Lincoln has needed a push for a long time. You just happened to be the push he needed.”
“Are you kidding me?” I stepped back, my hip crashing into the counter. A sharp jab traveled up my side, but I didn’t care. “I’m the push he needed? He didn’t need a push, Dad. What’s wrong with being happy with where you are?”
“He wasn’t happy where he was. He was born to lead, Sofia. If he wasn’t, he wouldn’t have taken control regardless of his rank. As I said, the Navy needs him. It was time for him to finally step up.”
Spiky trickles of terror danced down my spine. “Step up how? Where did you send him?”
“For now?” He sighed, his shoulders coming down as if he felt defeated. “We’ve sent him home, but he’ll be leaving soon. He’ll be gone for six months.”
“Six months?” I whispered. Hot tears jumped to my eyes and welled in the corners before leaking over.
“You’re sending him away for half a year because you think it’s time for him to step up?
That’s bullshit, Dad. All you’ve done is to force him into a position where he didn’t want to be.
After effectively eliminating all his other options by launching an investigation to prevent him from doing something he hadn’t yet done. ”
Dad opened his mouth again, presumably to tell me how wrong I was. I didn’t stick around to listen. He’d asked me to hear him out, and I had.
Arguing with him wouldn’t get me anywhere. More importantly, arguing with him wouldn’t keep Lincoln here. If anything, it might just turn his tour into twelve months instead of six.
Obviously, I’d been a fool for believing Dad would do the reasonable thing and admit his mistake. Instead, my own father had gone and corralled the man I loved into an impossible situation.
And in doing so, had put me right there with him.