Chapter 18
HUDSON
Iwas drunk. We all were. I didn’t think there was a sober one of us in the place. It had been a good time with no drama. Everyone was there to have a good time, and no one was interested in pulling any bullshit. That was the kind of night I liked to have.
The party had faded to just a few of us left. Huxley had been dragged out of the place about an hour ago by some very flirty blonde from out of town. I had a feeling the chick was going to be very disappointed when she got him home and figured out he was too drunk to perform.
I meandered over to Natalie, leaning against the bar and talking to a couple of women. She grinned up at me with bleary eyes. She was drunk as well. “Ready to get out of here?” I asked.
“I think we have to leave before Teresa throws us out,” she replied.
The moment she stood, she stumbled a little. I threw my arm around her shoulders and kissed the top of her head. “Come to my place,” I said. “I’m closer. I have to walk you home because that’s what a gentleman does, but I don’t think I can make it that far dragging the two of us.”
“Are you suggesting I’m too drunk to walk home?” she said.
“Are you suggesting you’re not?” I countered.
“Good point,” she said. “I guess it’s a sleepover at your place.”
We walked out of the pub and both paused to suck in the fresh air. It did little to sober me up. “Ready?” I asked.
“As I’ll ever be.”
We started walking, leaning against each other as we moved. “Did you have a good time tonight?” I asked her.
“I did.”
“Sorry I wasn’t able to be with you all the time,” I said. “I wanted to be, but I kept getting pulled away.”
“I don’t need a babysitter,” she replied. “I don’t expect you to shower me with attention every minute.”
“But I would like to,” I said with a laugh. “Trust me, I would have preferred staring at you than some of the ugly mugs I was forced to look at.”
“It was a wild night,” she said. “Poor Huxley is going to be feeling it again tomorrow.”
“He’s a big boy. He’ll figure it out.”
“I saw that little blonde had her talons dug into him pretty hard,” she said. “I hope she goes easy on him. Huxley is a dainty creature.”
“I doubt that,” I said. “I have a feeling there is going to be a lot of loving going on this night. There was a definite vibe in the pub tonight.”
“What kind of vibe were you picking up on?” she asked.
“Don’t act like you didn’t feel it,” I teased. “It was like a meat market. Everyone was eyeballing everyone else.”
“I think you’re right,” she said after a few seconds. “It was the vibe. It was making people do things they wouldn’t normally do.”
“Do you have something you want to tell me?” I joked.
“Let’s just say I did not have to buy a single drink tonight,” she said. “I had one particular suitor that was very attentive.”
“And you’re not talking about me.”
“I am not talking about you.” She leaned her head against my shoulder. “It was another young man.”
“Should I kick his ass for hitting on my date?” I joked.
“I guess you should have been paying closer attention.”
“Ah, so you are mad at me.” I dropped my hand to her waist and bounced her hip off my thigh. “Do you want to punish me when we get back to my place?”
“I’m not mad,” she said. “I just wanted you to know you almost lost me to a handsome man intent on getting me drunk.”
“Someone got you drunk,” I pointed out.
She giggled again. “I think that was you. Every time you did come back you were carrying a full pitcher. I lost count of how much I drank.”
“Good,” I said. “Tonight was about letting loose and having fun. You’re a grownup. You can get drunk now and then.”
“And end up going home with a man at the end of the night.”
“This is necessity,” I assured her. “I’m just looking out for both of us. I would hate for you to twist an ankle or fall flat on your face because you were too drunk to walk home.”
“Oh, I see.” She laughed. “This is you being a gentleman.”
“Exactly.”
I unlocked the door to my apartment and pushed it open.
“You got a couch!” she exclaimed and turned to look at me with surprise.
“Just delivered this morning,” I said.
She walked over and flopped down on it before bouncing up and down. “I like it,” she declared. “It’s comfy.”
“Should be, considering what it cost.”
“Look at you, a couch. Did you get a bed yet?”
“I’m working on it,” I said.
I walked to the fridge and stared at the scant contents. There wasn’t much of anything. “Want some toast?” I asked. “I don’t want to go to bed like this.”
She climbed off the couch and joined me in the tiny kitchen. “Like what?” she asked with her fingers trailing down my chest. “Drunk? Unsatisfied?”
I grabbed her wrist and stopped the downward descent of her hand. “We both need to eat something, or tomorrow is going to be rough,” I said. “We’re both drunk.”
“I know,” she said. “That was the point of drinking all that beer.”
I kissed her fingers, then gave her a quick peck on the lips. “Go sit down. I’ll find us something to eat.”
“I don’t think I’m hungry,” she pouted.
“Yes, you are,” I replied. I swatted her on the ass. “Go. Sit.”
“Fine,” she said and stumbled out of the kitchen. She flopped onto the couch once again. “Can I take off my shoes?”
“You can take off whatever you want,” I replied.
I heard her giggling as her shoes were tossed into the corner. As it turned out, I only had one heel left of the loaf of bread. Fortunately, I found some Eggos in the freezer. I stuffed them into the new toaster I had picked up earlier in the week.
“Drink this,” I said and handed her a glass of water. “And take these.”
She took the Advil and popped them in her mouth before washing them down. “Thank you. I’m not that drunk.”
“You’re not sober,” I countered.
“Neither are you,” she said.
“True, but it doesn’t last long with me. I don’t want you miserable in the morning.”
I went back to the kitchen and slapped some butter on the waffles before sliding a couple on a paper plate for her. I joined her on the couch with my own waffles. “Eat,” I ordered.
“I’m not sure I should,” she said with a grimace.
“Do you feel sick?”
“No, but I did drink a couple shots of tequila,” she answered.
I frowned. “Why?”
“Because my dashing young suitor wouldn’t take no for an answer.” She smiled before taking a bite. “I figured it was easier just to do the shots. It always made him go away.”
“Did you know this guy?”
“A little,” she said.
“You know, I probably don’t have to tell you, but you really need to be careful of guys bringing you drinks,” I cautioned.
“I know,” she said. “But you and Hux were there. And I know the guy. And everyone else there knows me. I wasn’t in danger.”
“I’m going to have to keep a closer eye on you,” he said. “I’m not sure I like some dude trying to get you hammered when you’re out with me.”
“I’m not hammered,” she argued.
“Eat your waffles.”
She grinned like a child as she stuffed her face. “These are so good,” she said with her mouth full.
“Do you want more?”
“No.” She shook her head. “I really don’t want to push it.”
“You can sleep on the air mattress,” I told her. “I’ll sleep out here.”
“No, sleep with me,” she pouted.
“I’m not trying to take advantage of the drunk woman in my apartment,” I said.
“You don’t have to take advantage if I’m offering,” she said seductively. “Don’t you want it?”
“I want it more than you could possibly know, but you’re drunk. I’m not going to do that. I’m not exactly stone-cold sober. I’d hate to be a disappointment.”
She smiled and patted my knee. “I doubt you even know how to be a disappointment. You’re good at everything.”
“I’d like you to keep that opinion, which is why I’m not going to fuck you tonight,” I told her bluntly.
I got up and pulled her up from the couch. “Come on, let’s get you to bed.”
“You’ll come with me, right?”
“I’ll sleep with you,” I said. “Nothing else.”
“Sometimes you don’t have to be a gentleman,” she pouted.
“Maybe not, but that’s not this time.”
I took off my shirt but left my shorts on. It would be too easy to take her up on her offer. I was a lot of things, but I wasn’t a bastard. I didn’t take advantage of drunk women. Ever. There had never been a need to and I wasn’t going to start with someone like Natalie.
She rolled to her side and kissed me. “Are you sure?” she asked in the darkness. “I’m not that drunk.”
“Baby, fucking you would be a dream, but not tonight. Not like this.”
“Alright,” she said and flopped onto the bed.
“Goodnight.”
The only thing I heard was a soft snore. I chuckled to myself and was glad I had stuck to my guns. She was in no condition to have sex. I was sure she wanted me, but I didn’t want to give her any reason to think I had taken advantage. I closed my eyes, content to simply sleep beside her.
I didn’t know how long it had been before I jerked myself awake in a cold sweat.
It took me several seconds to realize where I was.
The person softly snoring on my right wasn’t one of the guys.
We weren’t in the field catching a quick nap under a canopy of stars occasionally blotted out by an explosion in the distance.
My heart was racing. The clamminess I felt clinging to my body told me I had another one of the nightmares. Fortunately, I didn’t remember it, but my body had felt the effects.
I couldn’t lie next to her in a cold sweat.
Like I did so many other nights, I got out of bed and stumbled into the shower.
It was probably the exact wrong thing to do to help me sleep, but I couldn’t stand the stickiness of the dried sweat clinging to my skin.
I had to wash away the evidence of the dreams.
I turned on the water to a cool lukewarm and stepped under the shower spray.
I closed my eyes and practiced some deep breathing.
The anxiousness slowly faded. My heartrate returned to normal.
I took a few minutes to completely relax my body and mind.
I doubted I would be able to sleep, but I would lie beside her for a while.
I didn’t want her to know I’d been up. She’d ask about the dreams. That was not the kind of pillow talk I was interested in.
I stepped out of the shower and quickly toweled off before slinging the towel around my hips.
I looked at myself in the mirror and saw the dark shadows behind my eyes.
I wondered if anyone else could see them.
Maybe it was just me. I didn’t know. I hoped I was doing a better job at hiding what was happening behind the smile.
I quickly brushed my teeth and turned off the light before opening the bathroom door and tiptoeing back into the bedroom. I knelt on the floor and dug through my bag to find some clean underwear. One of these days I’d get a dresser.
“Hudson?” she murmured.
“Shh,” I whispered.
“What time is it?”
I looked at my waterproof watch. “Five,” I said. “It’s early. Go back to sleep.”
She sat up in the faint morning light. “Are you wet?” she asked with confusion.
“I took a quick shower,” I said. “I’m coming back to bed.”
She reached out and put her hand on my back. “You’re cold.”
“I’m okay.”
Before I could grab the underwear, she pulled me back until I was flat on my back. I stared up at her. Her mascara was smudged under her eyes and her hair was a mess. She’d never looked hotter.