TWELVE
“Y ou know,” Elion said, joining me on the third-floor balcony, “there are better ways to spy.”
“I’m not spying,” I lied.
He huffed, tugging at the lapels of his stiff silver coat. He glanced up at the clouds stained by the pink of sunset and sighed. “You aren’t worried about the wedding being postponed?”
I didn’t much care about the wedding. My interests stalked elsewhere. But they did include the prince who’d fucked me in a crusty garden shed.
Although I’d ignored what I’d been doing over the past two days, it didn’t make it any less true.
I’d waited for him before each meal but ate alone or with silent and scribbling Pholly. I’d anticipated his rich voice, smoothed and deepened by apathy, whenever nearing conversation in the halls.
I’d looked for him endlessly, only to find his absence.
It certainly didn’t escape me that something I should have been grateful for had now become something I quietly lamented.
Admitting to any of that would be woefully unwise, yet I couldn’t bring myself to feign concern over the wedding to better hide what haunted me. “No,” I said. “I know it’s not safe.”
Elion studied the procession of warriors marching toward the guarded castle gates.
Blue flags bearing the sun insignia flapped in the early spring breeze. The king rode at the front, covered in black and silver armor. No hint of the prince nearby.
Elion and I both knew why the wedding had been postponed. That it wasn’t because of the attacks—the Unseelie warriors gaining ground toward the castle.
They were simply the perfect excuse.
The king and his son would prolong the union until it could be prolonged no longer. Wedding a halfling into their pure-blooded line was never something they wished to do. My father had known that. He might have had some lofty goals, but he was no fool. He’d made the deal regardless.
An agreement he expected would be upheld.
I wondered how long he would humor their avoidance before he threatened them. Maybe he’d take me home. Maybe he’d do something far worse.
I shifted, suddenly freezing.
The steward kept his voice barely above a whisper. “You were supposed to marry when you reached nineteen years, were you not?”
I hummed in confirmation.
“The war’s end got in the way,” he said casually. Too casually. “Of course.”
I smiled. He was good at this. “Of course.”
“And now, war may well intervene again.”
“It may well,” I agreed.
We watched the warriors and king file through the gates until wagons carrying the fallen came into view at the end of the procession.
Only then did Elion speak once more. “If it’s any comfort, I don’t believe there’s much to gain from your death.”
Containing a snort, I nodded. His attempt to comfort me wasn’t necessary, but that he wished to was a comfort in itself. “Thank you, Elion.”
He gave me a grave sort of smile, then hurried inside to greet his king.
A sea of armor and horses flooded the drive and the hillsides on either side of it. I waited on the balcony until warriors began to disassemble with their steeds, leaving the castle grounds for the barracks and stables down the mountain.
He wasn’t there.
A hollowing weight sank within me. It stopped the sluggish beat of my heart as I searched the two wagons of the deceased for white-blond hair.
My nails dug into the wood of the vine-wrapped railing, close to breaking, my lungs too tight and—
A hand covered my mouth and the scream that tried to leave it as I was pulled back into the dim hall of the third floor.
Atakan pushed me against the wall and removed his hand. “I do believe we’ve been in this exact spot before, dread.”
I scowled. “You need to stop sneaking up on me.”
“But I live to keep your heart galloping because of me.”
He lived .
His eye was cut and slightly swollen. Without thought, I took his chin and rose onto my toes, turning it side to side to inspect his face. Then I shoved him back, feigning disgust when really, I just wanted to assess the rest of him.
Unscathed, seemingly.
He saw right through it. Brows furrowed, he stared down at me. As though my display of concern might have ruined his horrid intentions, he appeared unsure how to proceed.
I gave him a taunting smile.
It did the trick. He closed the small space between us and seized my face. His fingertips dug into my jaw. His gaze searched mine. His features creased.
Then he kissed me.
Hungry and bruising, he claimed my mouth with a firm press and a graze of his teeth. Our tongues met, and his hand dropped to my chest to fold over my breast. He squeezed it hard, ensuring I felt it through the layers of velvet and cotton. My fractured exhale earned me a groan that washed over my lips.
Nearing steps clacked.
He ignored them, so I did, too.
“When you’re quite done tainting yourself with the halfling you would rather murder than wed…” Ruelle said crisply. “General Kern is asking for you.”
Amusement was the last thing Atakan’s smile conveyed when he released me and stepped back. His teeth flashed at Ruelle, a look in his eyes that typically promised punishment.
Glancing back at me, he vowed, “We’ll play later, dread.”
After the way he’d left me before his return to the mountains to hunt the Unseelie, I wasn’t sure that was wise.
But I was sure I didn’t care.
Dinner was spent alone in the dining room.
I couldn’t determine why I didn’t eat in Atakan’s chambers instead. The cluster of tangled feelings might have been to blame as I hoped for a glimpse of the heartless prince. Perhaps it was the longing to feel secure.
To keep carving space for myself until I might fit.
Regardless, there was something odd and gratifying about sitting alone at the grand dining table in this castle that had played a role in many of my nightmares.
As I made to leave, distant steps pricked at my senses, and I halted in the doorway.
“Kern is right. Mark my words.” Disappointment lowered my shoulders at the growing sound of Garran’s voice. “He’s vanishing in and out of the wards.”
“We need more proof,” Atakan said, and those tangled feelings exploded into terrifying sparks.
“The influx of his warriors is all the proof we need. You cannot possibly believe they’ve all been hiding within our lands since the wards were created.” Their steps stopped. “Despite our victories, their numbers only climb higher.”
Atakan said nothing.
“The witches even said there was a possibility the king could vanish beyond the cursed borders.”
Atakan drawled, “I did warn you that keeping one of them alive would be beneficial.”
My breathing stalled. They’d killed the witches who’d survived spelling The Bonelands?
“Find him, Atakan,” Garran ordered, voice little more than a seethed whisper. “Kill him, and their antics come to an end. All of this ends.”
My thoughts fell free of confusion. For there was only one king they could have been talking about—the Unseelie king.
Atakan took his time responding. When he did, it was not about King Vane but my father. “What of Julis?”
Irritation sharpened Garran’s tone. “What about him?”
Silence.
Then, “Don’t be obtuse. He’s made two requests for a meeting since we postponed the wedding.” Atakan hissed his next words. “ Again . He’s more than displeased.”
“So we let him calm down. Few things are more grating than dealing with mortals and their undeserved entitlement.” Rustling sounded, followed by their continued footsteps. “A couple more weeks will give us time to fix this mess and assemble solid reason.”
If I wasn’t mistaken, something akin to impatience tightened Atakan’s response. “You are aware that no amount of excuses, no matter how reasonable, will be accepted.”
Garran groaned as if tired of the conversation. “Then perhaps it’s time we make Julis accept that his daughter’s life is meaningless to us, and he should be grateful we’ve humored him thus far.”
Believing the conversation had ended, I slunk back toward the dining table in case they approached.
But Garran laughed, a boisterous bark. “Don’t tell me you’ve begun to grow a heart after all these years.” He continued to laugh, even as he said with eye-widening seriousness, “Not when we are reliant on its lack of existence, my cold son.”
“You disgust me.” Garran’s rising laughter muffled Atakan’s venomous tone. “Almost as much as the halfling.”
I waited until they’d moved on down the hall before returning to Atakan’s tower.
His words didn’t bother me.
It wasn’t because I thought them a ruse to hide his growing affections for me. Such contempt had become a blade dulled by too much time.
It was the conversation itself that unnerved me. The confirmation my suspicions needed.
This betrothal was nothing more than a game. Another war that would drag out over years. Potentially lifetimes. It wasn’t supposed to be a squabble that would reach a bloodied climax any time soon.
But as my skirts dragged upon the stairs I slowly climbed, I feared my father would not stand to be further insulted.
That neither kingdom would stand for it.
Cold air blistered when I opened the balcony doors in Atakan’s chambers. I welcomed the chilled caress until I felt my frayed nerves calm, then I turned inside for Bernie’s coat.
Tucking my hands into the velvet pockets, I returned to the balcony.
My fingers brushed against more velvet inside the pocket before I remembered the hidden featherbone. I stroked the little bag, eyeing the dark and wooded expanse of the mountains.
There was no more smoke. The fires had been extinguished before the king and his warriors had returned. Guards once again lined the perimeter of the castle grounds and patrolled the trees beyond. Now and then, glints of armor, the swords at their backs, winked beneath the watery moonlight.
The sharp point of the bone poked through the velvet bag, snagging gently on the skin of my thumb.
A beastly snarl startled birds from trees. They screeched as they flapped toward the sky. Envy filled my heart at the sight, immediately followed by a bolt of shame.
I’d never wanted this. This treacherous life. This betrothal. The heartless prince.
Yet I couldn’t deny that a part of me now did.
I should want nothing more than to have this wedding postponed again and again and again. I should wish only for what I needed—the power to escape this fate.
But I’d learned long ago that wishing was futile. That survival was found in careful steps and the outrunning of fear.
Though even if I could seduce Atakan, play his games until he wanted nothing but me, I would never be free. Never be loved. A partial cage for a pet was still the best I could hope for.
Decade-old rage rattled the steel I’d spent years forging around my heart. Tears filmed my vision. For the first time in years, I didn’t care about survival.
For the first time in weeks, all I wanted was to go home.
Unaware I’d been squeezing the tiny bag, my breath caught as it cooled within my fist. Pulling it from my pocket, I opened the velvet and peered into the pouch lit by the creamy featherbone.
Curious, I walked inside and carefully pried it from the bag.
The bedchamber darkened.
My scream was lost—swallowed within a void of twisting, thunderous night.