14. Romy
14
romy
“ J ude, please, seriously! You’re killing me.” I was quickly unraveling. Unable to think about anything but this growing need .
His eyes were like twin pilot lights, blazing in the dark as he peered up at me from between my legs. I stroked the scruff of his cheek, twinning my fingers through his hair until I could grip his soft, dark locks.
That damn crooked grin of his made me rock my hips forward, seeking the friction I desperately wanted. God, I needed him to touch me.
He threaded his thumbs beneath the sides of my panties. Painfully slowly, he inched them down, never taking his eyes off mine.
My heart did a funny, little flutter, making me want to cough to return it to its natural rhythm.
Please, stop looking at me like that.
I didn’t want to think about the warmth now spreading from my chest, his eyes still holding mine.
So I gripped his hair harder, urging him on.
“Stay still, honey,” he practically growled this time.
He lowered his head, his eyes still watching me beneath dark lashes.
Then he flattened his tongue.
My mouth fell open on a moan as he ran it through my pussy up to my clit, circling that little bundle of nerves with the tip of his tongue, then gently nipped it between his teeth.
I moaned, closing my eyes. My hips rolled toward him. His fingers dug in, holding me in place as he sucked my clit into his mouth, then plunged his tongue inside of me.
“Jude!” I cried.
I ground my hips as he moved from sucking to flicking his tongue before swirling along my opening and plunging into my soaked center. His tongue rolled back up, lavishing me, and before I could demand more, his finger stroked my entrance and slid in. He continued to torture me with his tongue while his finger sank deeper, curling to hit the spot that made me feel as if I was going to fly off the seat.
God, he knew exactly what I needed. No one had ever read my body like he could.
I ground against his finger, wishing it was his cock—that I was filled with him .
“Fuck, Romy, my memory doesn’t do this justice.” His voice was low and rumbly, reverberating through my core while his lips brushed me.
“Play with your nipples while I fuck you with my finger and eat this beautiful pussy,” he told me.
My eyes cracked open to see his mouth glistening with me, and I wanted his lips. I wanted to taste myself on him.
“Kiss me, Jude.”
He cocked his head and gave me a little smirk. “I thought I told you to play with yourself, honey. Push up your shirt and take out your tits. I want to see you rub and pinch those perfect, hard nipples while you watch me fuck you. I’ll let you taste yourself when I’m good and done.”
A thrill went through me. This was a side of him I never saw when we were eighteen. I liked him bossy, especially if he was going to call me honey and talk dirty.
I pushed up my shirt, bringing my hands to my chest, feeling the hardened peaks through my bra. I released my breasts from their cups, squeezing them gently, brushing my thumbs across my nipples, sending an extra zing of intensity straight to my clit.
“Good girl.” He smiled. “Now you can taste how fucking good we are together.” He hovered over me, pressing his lips to mine.
I moaned, my mouth opening for him. As his tongue stroked across mine, he plunged two fingers into me.
Yes!
He swallowed my gasp.
“Do you taste yourself on my lips? Don’t you taste fucking good?”
I hummed, no longer capable of words, as he thrust his fingers in and out, curling them to stroke against that secret spot not even I could reach. My toes curled in my boots. He pressed his hardened cock against the inside of my thigh, continuing to thrust, stroke, and curl those damn fingers.
Was it this good before? As his body pressed against mine, I could barely remember before, this moment taking up space and expanding in every molecule of my body.
“That’s it, honey, ride my hand. Come for me.”
His lips pressed back against mine. My hand dove into his hair, holding him to me. I was on the brink, climbing that tidal wave, knowing I was so close to crashing, to finding that surge of pleasure.
I gripped him harder, feeling the pleasure skyrocket. The heel of his hand pressed against my clit, his fingers stroked my inner wall, and I rode it as if we were climbing altitude, my breath coming in jagged pants with the thinning air.
My climax hit me with such intensity, my mouth went numb. I gripped Jude to me, my hands clamping in his hair and shirt while my body curled in on him. His hand stilled, and he let me ride it until he milked every shudder out of me, my walls locking him in.
I held him to me, panting against his neck, while he slowly extricated his fingers, stroking up through my heat, drawing out an aftershock.
“ Jude ,” I gasped. “That was—” I could barely form words. My lips tingled. My body felt boneless. I hadn’t come like that since … well, since him.
He raised his head, his eyes hooded. “Incredible. If I could watch you come beneath me every night for the rest of my life, I’d die a happy man.”
His thumbs brushed across my cheeks almost reverently.
My heart did that silly, little leap again, and I quickly tamped it down.
Shut up, heart!
Voices and laughter pierced through the sound of our heaving breaths. We stilled, hearing the clops of horses nearing the stables.
“Let’s go to the house,” Jude said, shifting to help me pull up my panties and jeans.
He gave me that gut-crushing tilt of his lips before tucking a loose tendril of hair behind my ear, lightly kissing me again.
I was still buttoning my pants when Jude started the truck and wrapped his arm around my shoulders. He drew me against his side, and I let him, feeling completely Jell-O-fied.
Pulling away from the stables, the headlights hit the group of returning horses, giving us a flash of their knowing smirks.
Shit. They’re all going to know what we were doing.
I was too comfortable with the weight of Jude’s arm to shrug it off.
Did I just step into quicksand? Again? This time, I wasn’t sure it would be so easy to escape.
Thank God I was leaving tomorrow.
As we entered the double-wide, Jude flicked on lights, illuminating the living room. The pressure of his hand on my lower back followed me in, as if he wasn’t ready to let me go.
What was he expecting now? I wanted to invite him to bed with me. I didn’t feel half as satiated as I had hoped. Instead, I felt as though he was burrowing into my system, making me crave more of him. I wanted to taste him just like he tasted me. I wanted to slide my hands down his abs. I wanted to run my fingers along his tattoos. I wanted his cum on my lips. My mouth salivated with the thought.
But now, for some reason, my stomach cramped with nerves. He just gave me the most remarkable orgasm in his truck, and now I was nervous? What was wrong with me?
I knew this feeling well. Too well. And last time, I ran.
He grasped my hand, turning me to look at him.
Heat still radiated off him, his blue eyes soft and loving.
I was freaking weak in the knees. Who knew it was a real thing? I didn’t know if it was from the intense release my body just experienced that caused all the blood to rush out of my legs or if it was the way he was looking at me now.
He stepped into me, lowering his forehead to mine, and spoke softly, “Don’t think I don’t want you right now. Fuck. ” He closed his eyes briefly. “I’d love nothing more. But if I follow you to that bed, I don’t think I’ll be able to control myself, and I know I won’t want to let you go in the morning.”
My body did a little twitch, an echo of his fingers inside me. It now felt empty without him. It felt wrong .
“Are you sure?” I asked. I know I wasn’t.
Jude nodded, kissing my forehead. “Go get in bed. You need rest. Good night, Romy.”
The warm press of his lips was so sweet and gentle. Contrasting from the fevered kisses a moment ago.
“Night, Jude,” I said tentatively, taking off his jacket and handing it to him to hang up.
I walked away from him in the living room, down the hall to the bedroom. I wanted him to follow me. I held my breath and willed him to follow me. My center tightened with every step away from him.
But he didn’t follow me.
Waking up my last morning at Thornbrush, knowing I was leaving, felt as if I was being skinned alive. Each step I took, packing my bag, felt like I was being flayed.
I didn’t remember feeling this way before. Last time I left, it felt as though fire was licking at my heels and I needed to run before it consumed me.
Now, all I felt was anxiety. Leaving my sister to deal with this bullshit she got herself into, leaving the ranch that felt more like home than any place I’d ever lived, and leaving Jude … all to go back to a thankless career that was pushing me out the door. To the chance of running into my ex and his new girlfriend. None of it felt right.
It didn’t help that Travis texted me again this morning, asking me when I was going to come get my stuff out of the apartment. It was the last thing I wanted to deal with.
What was I doing? My life seemed more up in the air than it ever had.
I could stay here …
It was only a whisper of a thought. Too flimsy to grab ahold of before it drifted away.
Taking my bag out to the quiet living room, I heard Jude’s muffled voice. He was standing outside on the back porch, the sliding door closed. His bare back and tattoos on full display.
How did this man become so fucking hot?
I wanted to run my hand down those ridged back muscles, feel the warmth of his skin, but something stopped me from going to him.
Wearing his damn hat backward, his cell phone was pressed to his ear.
I strained to listen.
“Shit. An eight-week camp? I know, I know … we’ll talk about it when you get here. Did he really say that? Fuck Reyes! He makes it really easy to want to say yes to this fight just so I can pound his face in. Okay … watch the curves on the Pass. Truckers scream down the mountain. No.” He chuckled. “You’re not in Vegas anymore. Wait until you get to the ranch …”
Who was coming here from Vegas? Jude hadn’t told me anyone else was coming to the ranch. Did he need to tell me? It almost sounded like he was planning on getting back in the cage. The fucker hadn’t even fully recovered from his surgery.
A surge of frustration and irrational anger gripped my throat. I was in the dark, and for whatever reason, I felt as though he was hiding something from me. Just like Travis. I hated feeling that I was being shielded from the truth, that others knew something I didn’t when I walked into a room. There was obviously still a lot I didn’t know about Jude now. He had established a whole life and career without me over the past decade.
He doesn’t even live here, I had to remind myself. The ranch isn’t his life anymore. My life was a mess right now, and I wasn’t ready to put my heart on the line anyway.
Maybe it was my fucking trust issues or my habit of avoiding conflict, but it was exactly the swift ass-kicking I needed.
Dodge this while you still can, Romy.
My bag in hand, I turned and walked out the door.
Just like the coward I was before, once again, I was leaving without saying goodbye.
I shook my head, disappointed in myself. But not enough to make me turn back.
The rental car was parked next to Jude’s truck. I pressed the button to unlock the doors. Throwing my purse and carry-on into the passenger seat, I didn’t waste time turning it on and reversing out of the driveway. But I wasn’t leaving.
Not yet.