Chapter Twenty
TILLIE
It’s the beginning of the final week of the tour.
The guys have been doing amazingly well, and the fans’ support and adoration have been unimaginable.
These guys are seriously hitting it big.
There’s nothing they could ask for that they wouldn’t get, and in all honesty, they’re hot property right now.
And they only have themselves to thank for it.
They put in the hard work, and it pays off.
Not only is their music great, but they’re ridiculously gracious and humble with their fans.
They spend time with them, giving them the attention they need and deserve.
That’s what’s setting Recoil apart from the other bands out there at the moment and why they’re loved and adored.
They may not be the all-time number-one band in the world just yet, but sure as hell, they’re clawing their way up there fast.
It won’t be long.
My guys will get there.
I feel it in my bones!
They give back to their fans, like right now they’re doing an intimate show with just two hundred people, mainly competition winners.
The few tickets sold were pricey, with the proceeds going to Lunar’s foundation, which she’s running on the road with help from her foundation headquarters.
She’s so amazing in the way she can run her foundation across two countries, operate the merchandise booths, keep her relationship perfect, live the life of a rocker’s fiancée, and still look perfect every second of every day. That woman astounds me.
The strobe lights catch my attention as the encore performance starts.
The beat hits hard as Nate slams heavy on the percussion, and a smile forms on my face.
The vibration makes my entire body move without thinking about it.
The small room is dark, lit only by the stage lights—bright yellows and purples—strobing in time with the beats, thumping and thrashing a deep, hard rumble.
An electric wave sounds through the air, and my hairs stand to attention on my arms, sending a tingle down my spine.
I can’t see him, but I know he’s on the stage, shrouded in darkness, strumming at his guitar, sending a haunting sound through the room.
The crowd is silent as the music fills the space.
The guitar filters through along with the drums, the rhythm a perfect tune before Matt’s bass chimes in.
They’re in perfect sync. Everything is slow with a torturous tempo, a painful dance of anguish and woe.
Suddenly, the tempo picks up. Ryan slams on his guitar, and the lights shine down, illuminating him completely. He’s shirtless, his chest glistening under the heat of the lights. His muscles strain with the movements, and the slight outline of his abs is starting to appear.
The crowd erupts into a frenzy, cheering and screaming, jumping up and down in a mad haze of adoration for Ryan. He’s never looked as good as he does right now—in his element, center stage, and fitter than he has been for most of his life. He looks like the rock god he definitely is.
Taking a deep breath, I attempt to dull the throbbing ache I have for him by moving in a way a constant pressure sits across the bundle of nerves vibrating between my thighs. The man is delicious, and I know I’m not the only woman here with wet panties right now.
The fans scream even more when Danger runs onto the stage.
This place is erupting—their music is now only just audible over the screams.
It doesn’t take away from the performance. If anything, it adds to it.
As I stand back, I sway to the sounds, taking in the melody that my guys create together and enjoying their sound.
For once, I’m able to watch, and not from behind a cell phone.
There’s no live stream for this concert, seeing as it’s an exclusive event.
It’s only fair, seeing as a few of these fans paid such a hefty price to attend.
When it finally comes to an end, I smile so wide as the crowd explodes into applause and foot stomping, and I clap along with them. They work the room well, and I’m pleased to be a part of this.
The guys take their final bow and head off the stage.
I make my way behind the curtain, and Ryan spots me.
He turns, racing toward me, and I quicken my pace before launching myself at him.
He chuckles as I jump into his arms for an embrace.
He’s sweaty and sticky, but I don’t care.
He’s also shirtless, and that’s incredibly distracting as I wrap my arms around his neck and press my body against his completely.
My lips smash against his, and he runs his fingers through my hair, gently caressing my scalp.
We’re kissing in the back area, where the competition winners will be entering shortly. Hell, they’re probably coming in now. Watching Ryan up there on that stage does something to me. He turns me on like no man ever has, and seeing him handle his guitar gets me fired up.
I’m lost in a deep, sensual kiss when suddenly someone clears their throat right next to us, breaking the moment.
I pull back from Ryan, and we turn toward the noise.
Ryan’s face falls as he turns pale white, looking at the beautiful blonde bombshell like he’s seen a ghost. He lets go of me, taking a step back, his body instantly tense.
“Mel?” he asks as I swallow hard, trying to read his expression.
“Hey, fucker,” she says and launches herself at him. He thrusts himself at her, and they collide in an epic-scale hug before they sway each other from side to side.
“Fucking hell, what are you doing here?” he asks, his look now changed to utter jubilation.
She shrugs. “Won a competition.”
Ryan slumps his body as I wrap my arms around mine. “If you wanted to see me, you could have called.”
She sighs and winces as I stand back, watching the two obvious friends? exes? relatives? interact.
“I know, it’s just… hard.”
Ryan’s face falters, and he nods in acknowledgment. “I know.”
“Katie would have been so proud,” she says, making me furrow my brows.
“You think?” he asks while I stand back, wondering who the hell Katie is.
“I know! Being my best friend and all, I think I knew her pretty well,” she says, gripping his shoulder tightly. Seeing her hand on Ryan’s bare skin sends a wave of jealousy right through me, and I hate that I feel that way.
“Who’s Katie?” I ask, wanting to join in on their conversation.
Ryan looks at me, eyes wide like he’s forgotten I am here. “Someone I used to know.”
Mel stiffens while screwing up her face. “Really, Ryan?”
“Mel, please… leave it,” he chides, making goose bumps litter my skin.
There’s more to this… Katie, whoever she is.
I want to ask, but I can tell he’s shutting down.
Mel frowns. “Fine! It’s been good seeing you. I’m proud of you, Ryan,” she says, leaning in and kissing his cheek. Then, she turns and heads off toward Danger.
I glance at Ryan, who’s purposely not looking at me. Huffing, I grab his hand, and he looks at me with glassy eyes.
That look? It worries me completely.
He’s on edge, and I have no idea why.
“Ryan—”
“Don’t! Just leave it.”
He walks off, leaving me standing here with my heart aching and a knot forming in my stomach. I exhale, feeling the weight of the distance between us. I want to know more than anything about who Katie is and how she fits into everything, but he won’t let me in.
He sets up with the other guys to meet his fans, all smiles and charm, while I stand back, my insides slowly unraveling. It’s like watching a stranger, someone who can pretend everything is fine while I’m left drowning in uncertainty.
Ryan has a secret, a past he doesn’t want to share, and I’m not sure if that says more about him or me.
Am I not worth trusting?
Or is he too scared to reveal the truth?
I feel like I’m losing him, one piece at a time, and it terrifies me that I might not be able to hold on.
Where the hell do we go from here?
***
After the meet and greet, Ryan did his utmost to keep away from me.
He managed to find a way always to be talking to someone else.
He even sat with Nate on the way back to the hotel, which is weird because he thinks Nate’s the biggest asshole of all time, and he hates listening to him bitch and moan.
Now we’re walking to the penthouse, and I’m wondering if he’s even going to sleep in the same room as I am tonight.
Lunar steps up to me and raises her brow. “You guys have a fight?”
“No, I don’t think so… I don’t know. I just asked him who Katie was, and now he’s avoiding me.”
She purses her lips. “Katie… you say?” I nod. “Never heard that name mentioned before. What makes you think he knows a Katie?”
“Was something a friend of his said. I think Katie might be an ex or something, maybe the girl that broke his heart. I don’t know, but I pushed a button, and I think he’s pissed at me.”
She frowns. “Well, if he decides to be too much of a bitch, come tell me. You can sleep in my room tonight, and I’ll make Danger sleep with Ryan. Deal?”
“I don’t think Danger would—”
“Deal!” she says, opening her eyes dramatically.
“Okay, okay… deal.” I giggle, shaking my head. “Thank you.”
“What are friends for, if not to throw our men out on their asses if our bestie’s man is being a douche?”
I laugh. “Right.”
“It’ll be fine. Ryan doesn’t hold onto temper tantrums for long. I’m sure once you get in the bedroom, he’ll forget all about it.”
I fake a smile. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”
She pulls me to her side and wraps her arm around my shoulders, hugging me to her as we all walk inside the penthouse. “Right, I’m off. Let me know if you need me to kick Danger out.”
“Will do, and thanks again.”
“Chicks before dicks, Tillie!” she calls out as she crosses the living room.
The guys look at her and furrow their brows, especially Danger. I giggle, shaking my head as I move down to the bedroom and walk in to get changed for bed. It’s late, and I want to go to sleep.